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The Struggles of Having Immigrant Parents

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Published: Sep 12, 2023

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Language barriers, cultural clashes, economic struggles, identity and belonging, the rewards of resilience.

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I’m a First-Generation American. Here’s What Helped Me Make It to College

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My father is an immigrant from Mexico who decided to sacrifice his home to give me a better life. He grew up with the notion that the United States had one of the best education systems in the world and he saw that education as my ticket to participate in the pursuit of happiness.

When he moved to America, he chose Flushing, Queens, in New York City—which this year became an epicenter of the COVID-19 crisis—because the public elementary school was highly regarded for its academics and safety. But navigating the public school system was extremely difficult, marked with constant reminders that the system was not designed for students like me. These difficulties and inequities have been exacerbated by the COVID-19 crisis and will continue to impact students if they remain unaddressed.

My father always lived with the fear that if people found out I was the son of a Mexican immigrant, I would be ostracized in the classroom. From the first day of elementary school, he prayed that no one would bother me for being Mexican American, and that I would learn English quickly so I could defend against attacks on my identity. I have gone through all my academic career fighting the stereotypes that Mexicans are all “lazy” and “undocumented.”

I have experienced an interesting duality as a Mexican American, one that has played a formative role in my education and development. I have two languages, two countries, two identities. I learn in English but live in Spanish. I am Mexican at home but American at school.

I first became aware of this code-switching in middle school. The ways I interacted with my white, wealthy peers were far different from with my Latinx friends. I understood that English held more power than Spanish. Many people associate an accent or different regional variants of English to be unsophisticated, so I worked to be perceived as “articulate” and “well-spoken” at my local elementary and middle schools. In fact, it was my attention to coming across as “articulate” that helped me get into the high school that I attended.

I wanted to attend a high-achieving high school, but I did not perform well on the Specialized High School Admissions Test (SHSAT) and therefore failed to be admitted into one of New York City’s specialized high schools. But the principal of Millennium High School, a selective public high school in Manhattan, offered me a spot—and gave me a shot. Principal Colin McEvoy saw more than the student who failed to get into a SHSAT school. He saw a well-spoken kid who was determined to find a school that would have the resources to achieve his goal of graduating and going to college. My father had sacrificed everything so I could go to college, and I saw Millennium as the means to get there.

Not every student can have the same opportunity I did, but every school community and educator can take certain steps to support students who feel at odds within a system that was not designed for them. Here are three steps that will help students like me:

1. Play an active role in their students’ lives outside of academics. While this is important during “normal” times, it is even more important now during the global pandemic when students are worried about their family, cut off from friends, and unsure what the future holds. Each student should be assigned a teacher who also serves as adviser, an additional adult figure in their life to help guide and assist them—even if this is done virtually. At Millennium, each student in the beginning of the high school experience is assigned an adviser and meets in advisory class three days a week to complete college-preparatory activities and check in with their adviser about academics and their personal life.

2. Acknowledge how political developments may affect students. Schools should provide students who may be affected by a policy decision with the tools to protect their education. I have many friends who have been affected by the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals policy and had to go through the complex process of ensuring they could study in the country without their parents. This June, the Supreme Court rejected the Trump administration’s efforts to rescind DACA, but immigrants’ fight for protection under the law is far from over. It is important for teachers to understand how politics can impact the well-being of students—and how the fear of those impacts often take a toll on students’ academics.

3. Offer guidance on how to apply to college and options aside from college. My former high school requires every student to meet with the college guidance counselor at least twice, once each in their junior and senior years. As the first in my family to apply to college, these meetings were essential for me to figure out the application process, as well as for navigating financial aid and scholarships. It was only with this guidance that I applied for a Posse Foundation scholarship and earned a full scholarship to Middlebury College—opportunities that I would not have even known about otherwise.

As the COVID-19 vaccine gets rolled out more widely, there remain a lot of unknowns in higher education and in many families’ financial futures. Educators can help students explore alternate opportunities during this difficult time, including community college, internships, apprenticeships, gap years, or service-learning options.

Students of marginalized communities are both fighters and academics. Going through the American education system is difficult, and there are active ways that schools and educators can help their students navigate it. This is not a matter of doing the work for the students but acknowledging that there are several challenges present in students’ lives—challenges that may be exacerbated during a pandemic—and helping them navigate them.

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Your chance of acceptance, your chancing factors, extracurriculars, how should i approach writing my first-generation immigrant college essay.

Hi everyone! I'm a first-generation immigrant, and I want to write my college essay about my experiences and how they've shaped me. I want to make sure my essay stands out and isn't just another 'immigrant story.' Any advice on how to approach this topic in a unique way? Thanks in advance!

Hi there! It's great that you want to share your first-generation immigrant experience in your college essay. To make it unique, I suggest focusing on specific aspects of your journey that have impacted you the most. Here are a few tips to help you get started:

1. Reflect on the moments of your life that you feel define your immigrant experience. It could be a turning point, a struggle, or a triumph. Be as detailed as possible to make your story stand out.

2. Consider discussing how your background has influenced your perspective, values, and goals. Colleges appreciate students who bring diverse viewpoints to their campus.

3. Show, don't tell! Use descriptive language and anecdotes to paint a vivid picture of your experiences. This will help your essay come to life for the reader.

4. Avoid clichés and generalizations. Remember, your story is unique to you, so don't be afraid to be authentic and honest.

5. Lastly, proofread and revise your essay multiple times. This will ensure that your writing is polished and effectively conveys your message.

Good luck with your essay, and I'm sure you'll create something that is both meaningful and memorable!

About CollegeVine’s Expert FAQ

CollegeVine’s Q&A seeks to offer informed perspectives on commonly asked admissions questions. Every answer is refined and validated by our team of admissions experts to ensure it resonates with trusted knowledge in the field.

How to Write a Standout College Essay about Immigrant Parents

Kate Sliunkova

AdmitYogi, Stanford MBA & MA in Education

If you're a high school student, chances are you've been asked to write an essay before. Writing about your immigrant parents can be a daunting task, but it can also be a beautiful opportunity to share your unique perspective. With the right strategies and mindset, you can craft an essay that not only showcases your writing skills but also honors the sacrifices and experiences of your immigrant parents.

Acknowledge the Significance of Your Parents' Journey

Before delving into writing your essay, it's crucial to acknowledge and appreciate the significance of your parents' immigration journey. Recognize the sacrifices they made, leaving behind their home country, family, and familiar surroundings, to provide a better life for you and your family. This appreciation will help you approach your essay with a deeper understanding and empathy. To explore successful college essays that highlight the importance of family sacrifices, visit AdmitYogi for inspiring examples.

Use Their Story as a Springboard for Self-Reflection

Your parents' immigration story serves as a powerful springboard for self-reflection. Reflect on the impact their journey has had on you - your identity, values, and aspirations. Consider how growing up in a multicultural household has shaped your worldview and influenced the choices you've made. This self-reflection allows you to connect your personal growth to your parents' experiences, providing a rich and compelling narrative. AdmitYogi can provide additional guidance on how to effectively incorporate self-reflection into your essay.

Choose a Meaningful Essay Topic

Selecting the right essay topic is crucial to capturing the attention of college admissions officers. Instead of focusing solely on your parents' story, choose a topic that reflects your own experiences and values, while weaving in elements of their journey. For example, you can explore moments where you grappled with language barriers and how those challenges fostered your determination to excel academically and embrace diverse perspectives.

Consider discussing the cultural differences you navigated while transitioning to the United States. Highlight the lessons you've learned about cultural diversity and your ability to adapt and thrive in new environments. This demonstrates your resilience and adaptability, qualities that colleges value in their applicants.

Infuse Your Essay with Personal Anecdotes

To make your essay engaging and memorable, infuse it with personal anecdotes that illustrate key moments or lessons from your own journey. Share specific stories that demonstrate your growth, resilience, and unique perspective. For instance, you can write about a time when you bridged a cultural gap between your parents' native traditions and American customs, showcasing your ability to navigate cultural complexities with sensitivity and openness.

By incorporating personal anecdotes, you showcase your individual experiences and emphasize how you have been shaped by your parents' immigration story, while maintaining the focus on you.

Reflect on the Intersection of Your Identity and Values

Colleges are interested in understanding who you are as an individual and the values you hold dear. Reflect on how your parents' immigration journey has influenced your own identity and values. Discuss the lessons you've learned about perseverance, determination, and the importance of education.

Highlight the ways in which your parents' sacrifices have motivated you to seize educational opportunities and strive for excellence. Emphasize how their story has instilled in you a deep appreciation for the value of education and the pursuit of knowledge.

Showcase Your Personal Growth and Aspirations

A compelling college essay should demonstrate personal growth and aspirations. Reflect on how your parents' experiences have influenced your own aspirations and goals for the future. Discuss the career paths, community involvement, or social initiatives that you are passionate about, and how they align with your values and the experiences you've had growing up as a child of immigrants.

Craft a Narrative That Captivates Admissions Officers

To make your essay truly standout, craft a narrative that captivates admissions officers. Start with a powerful and attention-grabbing opening. This could be a personal anecdote, a thought-provoking question, or a vivid description that draws the reader in from the very beginning.

Throughout your essay, use descriptive language and storytelling techniques to paint a vivid picture of your experiences and the impact of your parents' journey on your life. Engage the reader's senses and emotions, allowing them to connect with your story on a deeper level.

Writing a college application essay about your immigrant parents is an opportunity to celebrate your unique perspective and honor their experiences. By focusing on you and infusing your personal growth, values, and aspirations into the essay, you create a compelling narrative that highlights your individuality.

Remember to reflect on the intersection of your identity and values, choose a meaningful topic, and craft a narrative that captivates admissions officers. AdmitYogi , a trusted resource for successful college essays, offers a wealth of examples and guidance to help you throughout your writing journey. With these strategies and the support of AdmitYogi, you can write a standout essay that makes colleges eager to admit you and the incredible journey you represent.

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COLLEGE ESSAYS ABOUT IMMIGRANT PARENTS

College essays about immigrant parents have been part of the curriculum for ages. It is sporadic for students to get a forum allowing them to share their experiences with fellow students and lecturers. Their incorporation into the education system is to allow the appreciation of immigrant students and their backgrounds. Therefore, college essays on immigrant parents create a space to learn more about various upbringings, creating a newly found respect for people’s experiences.

This article will highlight various aspects of essays concerning immigrant parents. The importance of these essays, challenges faced by immigrant parents and their impact on the children, examples of college essays on immigrant parents, and tips on how to write these essays will be discussed in the article.

Importance of college essays on immigrant parents

The education system in the 21 st century has had applaudable efforts in integrating various aspects within the curriculum. Appreciation elements incorporated in the syllabus have also brought solutions to problems among school students, such as harassment and bullying. In addition, giving insights into people’s backgrounds allows students to fledge admiration and respect for their counterparts. The following are the importance of COLLEGE ESSAYS ABOUT IMMIGRANT PARENTS:

• Appreciating people’s backgrounds and culture

The best form of education is acquired through experience. Students have sat through several history lessons highlighting Mexican or Hispanic history. However, nothing beats these lessons, such as one-on-one engagement with a fellow student which foreign roots. Interaction with these students allows more insight into their backgrounds and culture. With a spice of school-organized events such as cultural days, students experience the magnificence of other cultures surrounding them and get a slice of the world’s vastness.

College essays also give acumens on the struggles encountered by immigrant parents as they try to provide the best for their children. 

• Creating diversity within the institution.

The spectacle of having students gracing the colleges with their differences can be whimsical. Likewise, experiencing people in their cultural and national attires would be a sight to admire. However, due to college policies or the embarrassment of embracing one’s roots, it may be challenging to identify the diversity of cultures and nationalities within an institution.

College essays on immigrant parents spark and promote diversity within an institution. It also allows students to know and treat each other better after acquiring knowledge of their counterpart’s histories and backgrounds. Learning about the nationalities of students within the institution may also promote events set to appreciate the diversity and various opportunities offered to them.

• Sheds more light on how to treat immigrant students

Knowledge is power, and the lack of it may cast blindness on essential aspects required for smooth development. Immigrant students or students with immigrant parents have been subject to harassment and bullying for ages. They have also been socially cast out and considered different. Progressively, this has created unadmirable traits such as fear, anxiety, depression, and stress. 

Essays about immigrant students or students with immigrant parents may bring many to tears. Most of these students have encountered daunting challenges to be graced with college opportunities. These essays, therefore, offer guidance to students and lecturing s on how to treat these students. The papers allow the identification of triggers and discernment of ways to tread with the students and make them feel welcomed and cozy within the school environment.

• Finding out your roots.

It would be ignorant to assume that all students cognize their roots. Parents may have wanted to shield their children from their struggle stories or may not have found it necessary to make their children aware of their backgrounds. College essays on immigrant parents allow students to dig further into their roots and experiences. It also allows them to appreciate their parents’ efforts in raising and providing their amenities.

• Morphing new perspectives

The mind is like a river that flows to no bounds. Limiting the reason would be challenging, as it is natural to want to experience it.

According to travel advisors, one main reason for travel is to free your mind from being jammed in a furrow. Our environment highly constitutes our behaviors and characteristics. The mind goes as far as the eyes can see and the ears hear. New and captivating experiences change the game plan and improve our perspectives.

Interactions with students from various backgrounds are ideal for creating new perspectives. It allows you to learn that viewpoints are not always similar, and there is plenty more to learn about beyond our environment. Trying out new cultures and foods will leave a raw and unexplored craving in your mind, which drives you to significant ends, thus acquiring new perspectives on life.

Challenges faced by immigrant parents

Every parent dreams that their children encounter a better life than they did. Immigrant parents often get too engrossed in setting out for greener pastures, and their children may not realize their challenges.

Immigrant parents have been in dire straits as they look to provide a better future for their children. The challenges faced by immigrant parents include:

• Fear of being deported

Daunting thoughts of fear of being banished have terrorized the minds of immigrant parents for far too long. History has had far too many cases of immigrants being expedited back to their original countries. Some homeland countries do not have appropriate policies to cater to and protect their citizens in foreign countries. Visa and passport hiccups have been recorded among immigrants, sending them back to their countries for a fault that was not theirs. The change in management may also threaten immigrants when an order by a new president is issued, thus sending them back to their original countries.

This has subsequently been challenging for parents, as they fear for their children in case such ordeals happen.

• Fitting into a new country

Embracing new experiences and environments can be nerve-wracking, especially when doing it alone. The experiences faced by immigrant parents as they try to fit into a new country would be terrifying even to the sturdiest guru. Immigrant parents have faced the challenges of acquiring new jobs, enrolling their children in schools, and finding a neighborhood to raise them. Most have had to do all these without a mentor or acquittance to assist them. Looking back at your success can be emotionally gratifying, but the process can shatter you into a million pieces.

• Struggle to adapt to new cultures and languages

Imagine having to learn Russian or Mandarin as a native American of 35 years. Unfathomable, right? Survival in these new places would feel impossible, but most immigrant parents were accorded with these challenges, and they made it. In the 21 st century, this may not strike you as a challenge due to technologies such as Google Translate or Duolingo. 

However, immigrant parents encountered language barriers and culture shocks. Nothing may have prepared them on what to expect. Many might have also suffered an identity crisis and were forced to cocoon their original cultures and languages for smooth adaptation.

• Financial pressure

Moving and settling into a new country is financially draining. Factors such as securing a house or buying a car may become challenging due to a weak credit score. Many immigrants have returned to their original countries after facing financial difficulties. Paired with the challenge of securing a job, this matter has frustrated parents and created fear of sustaining their families in foreign countries. 

• Discrimination and prejudice

Prejudice against nationality, culture, color, and other differences has posed many difficulties for immigrant parents. As a result, the intention of providing a better future for children can become clouded due to fear of their children experiencing prejudice or racism. For example, immigrants from Syrian or Arabic countries may often be prejudiced as terrorists. The biases may be due to news exacerbated and consumed by people.

Impact of these challenges on the children

The difficulties cited may have the following effects on the children

• Fear of being left alone

Due to the fear of the deportation of immigrant parents, children may live on the edge in fear of this uncertainty. The fear of fending for themselves may cause disorientation in their academic as well as personal lives

• Goal orientation and hard work

Most children with immigrant parents may develop the urge to be hardworking and develop skills in goal orientation. This is after the understanding that a golden spoon is forged on fire and force after sharing their parents’ experiences. The fear of disappointing their parents may also work as a motivation

• Pressure to become successful

Parents are instrumental influencers in the shaping of children’s futures. However, due to the formidable experience encountered by parents, children may gain pressure to ensure their success. This successively leads to anxiety and depression, or even resentment against their immigrant parents, pushing them to greater levels.

• The pressure of being discontinued from schools

Financial constraints on a parent may influence a child’s performance. Fear of being chased out of school due to fee arrears may subsequently degrade the performance in school. Fear of being embarrassed among other students may also create social anxiety.

Examples of college essays about immigrant parents

There are plenty of examples in college essays about immigrant parents. Accessing straightforward samples on the internet can sometimes be sapping. However,  writemyessays.com is a companion to students streamlining their educational process and helping them bag that degree. 

An example of an essay of immigrant parents is one of an Assyrian student in America. The student explains how petrifying it was to adapt and fit in. The pressure of fitting in was numbing to the point of wanting to look like the American kids and having a ‘normal’ name. Having strict Middle Eastern Parents felt like a step back in her favor, as they would emphasize accommodation and retaining their culture through matters such as dressing. The parents also restricted interactions with other children, hence struggling to relate with her peers.

However, their experiences in navigating life as young immigrants were helpful to the student since her parents enabled her to embrace her identity retrospectively without shedding her personality as they had. Eventually, the child appreciates her parents’ efforts, especially in preserving their culture. She also developed better judgment, was true to herself, and followed her dreams.

Another example of immigrant parents is a student who witnessed his mother rise from tragedy to grace. The immigrant parent had faced many challenges, and being widowed made her accustomed to providing for her four children. She had to work more than 60 hours a week to sustain her family. His mother, unfortunately, fell ill, and the student took it upon himself to fend for his mother. His academics significantly suffered due to his engrossment in employment. The student sustained while trying to attain a balance through these tasks. However, he was able to place his mother on an insurance plan and finish the mortgage on their house.

Having an immigrant parent sprouted the student’s hard work. But, despite the challenges, he also gained sustenance skills and resilience, which eventually put him on the path of being a teacher.

Tips for writing essays on immigrant parents

• Write about yourself truthfully and your life experience with your immigrant parent.

No one can fit into your shoes as well as you would. Only you know where it pinches and where it sags. Student experiences with immigrant parents are unique to them. As you write your story, believe that it is the best. Avoid the notions of what to write and to avoid. Let your thoughts flow through the paper, and share your authentic experience through the voice of words. Mimicking other people’s experiences will create an off-balance and cause you to lose your etch.

• Create a vivid explanation

Everyone has a story to tell. Several other students have compelling experiences to captivate the college admission officers. It is all a matter of how well you tell and describe your report to create higher stakes for your competitor. 

You can create a mirage with the right words and allow your audience to experience with you. Paint an arresting image of your experience with an immigrant parent. Describe your journey vividly and showcase how your immigrant parents have influenced aspects of your life through their experience and sacrifice. Vividly showcase how their challenges have been instrumental through your academic life and all steps encountered to allow you to experience life as it is. Remember also to depict how they overcame stumbling blocks along their path.

• Focus on how you solved the problem

A common mistake students make while writing essays on immigrant parents is focusing too much on the challenges encountered. It is appropriate to give reverence to hiccups immigrant parents may have experienced in the quest for greener pastures. However, too much wallowing in the challenges beats the point of the essay.

Therefore, students must avoid pity cards. Instead, highlight the issues and problems you have encountered briefly. Then, to outline the light at the end of the tunnel, explain how your parents rose above their challenges. Describe how their encounters have made you a better individual and how their sacrifices have shaped your life and future.

• Avoid clichés

This advice, as it is, is already a cliché. Nevertheless, this advice is at the tip of every lecturer’s tongue. However, as repetitive and vague as it may be, students must avoid clichés in their articles.

Your story may be the average dust to grace. However, one way to avoid clichés when writing about immigrant parents is to think of it’s your parents’ biography. Since you would want it to be the best and most tremendous moving story the college admission officers have ever read, try as much to avoid clichés. Customize your essay to your experience and be creative about it. 

• Make the essay about you, not your parents.

This may sound tricky, primarily because the essay requires you to write about your immigrant parents. However, the report must highlight your experience with them and how their being immigrants have influenced your life

Speak about the challenges you may have encountered and vividly describe how their challenges ulteriorly impacted you. Then, create your rainbow of the experience and highlight how their sacrifice has positively impacted you. It is also vital to include adapted characters gained as a result and how they will be helpful through your life as a student and even in the future.

Shaun Hick quotes that people need to spend more time in the shadows to appreciate standing in the sun. Immigrant parents’ efforts may often go unnoticed by children and society. Schools have awarded a forum for discussing these experiences and chiseling an understanding to the children on the struggles encountered. Through essays on immigrant parents, students can observe life through a magnified lens, thus allowing them to be more appreciative of the life conferred to them by their parents.

With the tips provided, you can now furnish your immigrant parents’ story that will move the audiences to share in your experience and render their hats down in respect. 

Lesley Hummings

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College Essay: Sum of All My Parts

Korean adopted.

All powerful words that make me who I am.

People sometimes ask me when I knew I was adopted. My response is always the same: I always knew. There was never an ah-ha moment. My parents, a middle-class couple who met in a college classroom, constantly brought the topic up. They taught me my culture was something to be proud of. Although my parents and I had different experiences of becoming a family, they love me. There is no doubt. My parents could have had kids but chose not to, so my sister and I were never a second option to them. They taught me how to love differences and be inclusive to everyone.

Everyone, no matter their story or the path they take, is equal. I carry that mentality with me every day; it makes me who I am. My values influence me in what I do and how I act. No matter skin, age, identity, religion or gender, nothing should get in the way of someone being treated fairly.

But, regardless of how I’ve gotten here, living in a world with so many people and things working against you is still hard. People judge you for what you wear and what you say. People constantly stare because I have two white parents. I’ve had to learn to become perceptive to the judgment of others.

I’ve been forced to realize my place in society. I’ve had to learn to be understanding and patient and learn how to control my emotions. I stand strong and block out people’s stares and comments toward my family. I ignore their insensitivity, and I am patient with people’s ignorant questions. I am asked, “Are you from North or South Korea?” I want to yell, “If you knew your history, or anything at all, you’d know I’m from South Korea.” Instead, I politely answer the question and accept that they don’t know better, that the person asking the question might not realize its impact. Can you imagine a complete stranger coming up to you and asking you a totally personal question? How would that make you feel?

When people come up to me and ask these questions, I choose to take the high road rather than judge them , because I enjoy helping them understand the impact of their words. I like the feeling of knowing I personally helped someone understand something important to me just a little more, and this feeling drives me to continue advocating not just for myself, but for the other things I care about too: Black Lives Matter, LGBTQ pride, freedom of religion, women’s rights, animal cruelty, anti-Trump activism, access to education, refugees, sexual harassment, child soldiers, child labor, protecting our oceans, police brutality, borders, migrants and countless other social justice issues around the world. Being driven and having goals in my life has only helped me become a more aware leader.

I know I have felt left out in both cultures—American and Korean. That is what made me resilient. I have come to terms with my identity and who I am, and I now know that some voices aren’t heard loudly enough. I advocate for others the way I would advocate for myself. Going to college will allow me to explore my options and the ways I can apply my talents toward amplifying the voices of others.

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