giving and receiving presents essay

THE JOY OF GIVING: The more you give of yourself, the more you find of yourself

We all know how great it feels to receive gifts. However, the joy of getting is short-lived. Our lives are richer when we share, and that great inner joy comes from helping others to better their lives.

Truly giving from the heart fills your life with joy and nourishes your soul. Giving provides an intrinsic reward that’s far more valuable than the gift. As Mahatma Gandhi said, “To find yourself, lose yourself in the service of others.”

Giving takes you out of yourself and allows you to expand beyond earthly limitations. True joy lies in the act of giving without an expectation of receiving something in return.

Academic research and thousands of years of human history confirm that achieving meaning, fulfillment, and happiness in life comes from making others happy, and not from being self-centred. Mother Teresa is a famous example. She found fulfillment in giving of herself to others. She helped change the expression on dying people’s faces from distress and fear to calmness and serenity. She made their undeniable pain a little easier to bear.

Adventure, Height, Climbing, Mountain, Peak, Summit

When people are asked why they give, the readiest answers include: God wants me to; I feel better about myself; others need, and I have; I want to share; it’s only right. The question I would ask is how did you feel? I imagine you felt very pleased with yourself and happy inside.

It has been my experience that when you’re focused on giving to others you’re less likely to become consumed by your own concerns and challenges. Giving provides an opportunity to look beyond our own world and see the bigger picture.

A great perspective can be achieved by stepping out of our own world and venturing into the world of other people. Your worries and challenges may not seem as significant when compared to other people’s situations.

The act of giving kindles self-esteem and brings happiness. Scientists have discovered that happiness is related to how much gratitude you show. After several years of soul searching, I discovered that my unhappiness was due to my want for things to fill the void of loneliness.

My search for inner happiness led me towards gratitude. During this process of self-realization, I also discovered “ The Purpose of Living.” Yes, I believe that giving thanks makes you happier. But don’t take my word for it—try it out for yourself.

The power of giving and the joy of helping others

Giving is one of the best investments you can make towards achieving genuine happiness. True giving comes from the heart, with no expectation of reciprocation. You’ll find that the more you give, the more you’ll receive.

Frog giving another frog flowers - The joy of giving

The power of giving is manifested in the kindness and generosity that you bestow on someone else. When you give to another unselfishly, the vibrational energy emitting from your subconscious is at its strongest. The power of giving, according to neuroscience, is that it feels good.

A Chinese proverb says: “If you always give, you will always have.” A famous American author and management expert, Ken Blanchard, declared “The more I give away, the more comes back.”

If you find yourself feeling unhappy, try making someone else happy and see what happens. If you’re feeling empty and unfulfilled, try doing some meaningful and worthwhile work and see how you feel. The catch is that you must do this work with passion and enthusiasm.

There are many organizations, institutions and people who are engaged in exemplary works of giving. Narayanan Krishnan is a management graduate from Madurai, India who gave up his career as chef with a five-star hotel when he saw a man so hungry that he was feeding on his own excreta. From there on Krishnan started his noble initiative to feed thousands of destitute and homeless people in his state—free of cost.

Another example of giving is Sanjit “Bunker” Roy, founder of the Barefoot College . Since graduating from college in 1965, Mr. Roy has committed his life to serve the poor and to help rural communities become self-sufficient. The Barefoot College education program encourages learning-by-doing, such as training grandmothers from Africa and the Himalayan region to be solar engineers so they could bring electricity to their remote villages.

It’s the joy and love that we extend to others that brings true happiness or union with God. When we give, we reap the joy of seeing a bright smile, laughter, tears of joy and gratitude for life . We know that if people give just a little more—of their time, skills, knowledge, wisdom, compassion, wealth and love—the world would be a more peaceful and healthier place.

The rewards of giving are priceless. If you want to have happiness, you need to give happiness. If you want love, you need to give love. It is only in giving that you receive. No matter what your circumstances in life, you have the ability to give.

I encourage you to look for opportunities where you can give and help others. The gift of joy will come to you when you give of yourself to others. That’s what life is all about. Let’s practice and commit our lives to giving joy. Try it! It works!

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overhead view of two pairs of hands, each extending a gift

What’s the point of giving gifts? An anthropologist explains this ancient part of being human

Associate Research Professor of Anthropology, University of Colorado Denver

Disclosure statement

Chip Colwell receives funding from the National Endowment for the Humanities and National Science Foundation. He is affiliated with the Wenner-Gren Foundation and SAPIENS.

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Have you planned out your holiday gift giving yet? If you’re anything like me, you might be waiting until the last minute. But whether every single present is already wrapped and ready, or you’ll hit the shops on Christmas Eve, giving gifts is a curious but central part of being human.

While researching my new book, “ So Much Stuff ,” on how humanity has come to depend on tools and technology over the last 3 million years, I became fascinated by the purpose of giving things away. Why would people simply hand over something precious or valuable when they could use it themselves?

To me as an anthropologist , this is an especially powerful question because giving gifts likely has ancient roots . And gifts can be found in every known culture around the world.

So, what explains the power of the present?

Undoubtedly, gifts serve lots of purposes. Some psychologists have observed a “warm glow” – an intrinsic delight – that’s associated with giving presents. Theologians have noted how gifting is a way to express moral values, such as love, kindness and gratitude, in Catholicism , Buddhism and Islam . And philosophers ranging from Seneca to Friedrich Nietzsche regarded gifting as the best demonstration of selflessness. It’s little wonder that gifts are a central part of Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa and other winter holidays – and that some people may even be tempted to regard Black Friday , the opening of the year-end shopping season, as a holiday in itself.

But of all the explanations for why people give gifts, the one I find most convincing was offered in 1925 by a French anthropologist named Marcel Mauss .

happy girl opens a box glowing from within by a Christmas tree

Giving, receiving, reciprocating

Like many anthropologists, Mauss was puzzled by societies in which gifts were extravagantly given away.

For example, along the northwest coast of Canada and the United States, Indigenous peoples conduct potlatch ceremonies. In these dayslong feasts, hosts give away immense amounts of property. Consider a famous potlatch in 1921 , held by a clan leader of the Kwakwaka’wakw Nation in Canada who gave community members 400 sacks of flour, heaps of blankets, sewing machines, furniture, canoes, gas-powered boats and even pool tables.

In a now-famous essay titled “ The Gift ,” originally published almost a century ago, Mauss sees potlaches as an extreme form of gifting. Yet, he suggests this behavior is totally recognizable in most every human society: We give things away even when keeping them for ourselves would seem to make much more economic and evolutionary sense.

Mauss observed that gifts create three separate but inextricably related actions. Gifts are given, received and reciprocated.

The first act of giving establishes the virtues of the gift giver. They express their generosity, kindness and honor.

The act of receiving the gift, in turn, shows a person’s willingness to be honored. This is a way for the receiver to show their own generosity, that they are willing to accept what was offered to them.

The third component of gift giving is reciprocity, returning in kind what was first given. Essentially, the person who received the gift is now expected – implicitly or explicitly – to give a gift back to the original giver.

But then, of course, once the first person gets something back, they must return yet another gift to the person who received the original gift. In this way, gifting becomes an endless loop of giving and receiving, giving and receiving.

This last step – reciprocity – is what makes gifts unique. Unlike buying something at a store, in which the exchange ends when money is traded for goods, giving gifts builds and sustains relationships. This relationship between the gift giver and receiver is bound up with morality. Gifting is an expression of fairness because each present is generally of equal or greater value than what was last given. And gifting is an expression of respect because it shows a willingness to honor the other person.

In these ways, gifting tethers people together. It keeps people connected in an infinite cycle of mutual obligations.

busy city street with lights and holiday decorations

Giving better gifts

Are modern-day consumers unknowingly embodying Mauss’ theory a little too well? After all, many people today suffer not from the lack of gifts, but from an overabundance.

Gallup reports that the average American holiday shopper estimates they’ll spend US$975 on presents in 2023 , the highest amount since this survey began in 1999.

And many gifts are simply thrown out. In the 2019 holiday season, it was estimated that more than $15 billion of gifts purchased by Americans were unwanted, with 4% going directly to the landfill . This year, holiday spending is expected to increase in the U.K. , Canada , Japan and elsewhere.

Modern-day gifting practices may be the source of both awe and anger. On the one hand, by giving presents you are engaging in an ancient behavior that makes us human by growing and sustaining our relationships. On the other hand, it seems as if some societies might be using the holiday season as an excuse to simply consume more and more.

Mauss’ ideas do not promote runaway consumerism. On the contrary, his explanations of gifts suggest that the more meaningful and personal the present, the greater the respect and honor being shown. A truly thoughtful gift is far less likely to end up in a dump. And vintage, upcycled, handmade goods – or a personalized experience such as a food tour or hot air balloon ride – might even be more valued than an expensive item mass-produced on the other side of the world, shipped across oceans and packaged in plastic.

Quality gifts can speak to your values and more meaningfully sustain your relationships.

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Reciprocity
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Essay on Gift

Students are often asked to write an essay on Gift in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Gift

Understanding gifts.

Gifts are a way to show love, appreciation, and gratitude. They can be anything from toys, books, clothes, or even time spent together.

The Importance of Gifts

Gifts are not just about the material things. They symbolize the giver’s affection and thoughtfulness. They help in strengthening relationships and creating happiness.

The Joy of Giving

The act of giving gifts brings joy not only to the receiver but also to the giver. It’s a way of expressing love and care, making both parties feel valued and special.

250 Words Essay on Gift

The essence of gifting.

Gifts are more than just material objects. They are embodiments of sentiments, gestures that communicate love, respect, and appreciation. They serve as a bridge, connecting individuals and strengthening bonds. In a broader sense, gifts can be seen as a social glue, a tool that facilitates interaction and fosters relationships.

Gifts: A Psychological Perspective

The symbolism of gifts.

Gifts carry symbolic meanings, often reflecting the giver’s perceptions about the receiver. A thoughtfully chosen gift can speak volumes about the depth of a relationship, and the effort invested in choosing the right gift can be a testament to the level of care and consideration between individuals.

Gifts and Cultural Significance

Gifts also play a significant role in various cultural practices and traditions. They are used to mark milestones, celebrate achievements, and honor individuals. The type, value, and manner of giving gifts can vary greatly across different cultures, reflecting diverse societal norms and values.

In conclusion, gifts are more than just material objects exchanged between people. They are a complex interplay of emotions, symbolism, and cultural significance, playing a crucial role in human relationships and societal structures. The act of gifting, thus, is a profound expression of human connection and shared experiences.

500 Words Essay on Gift

Introduction.

Gifts, in their many forms, have been an integral part of human societies since time immemorial. They serve as tangible representations of human emotions, acting as a bridge between the physical and emotional realms. They are often used to express love, gratitude, friendship, and even apology. This essay explores the concept of gifts from various perspectives, including their social, psychological, and economic implications.

The Social Significance of Gifts

Gifts play a crucial role in the social fabric of societies. They are used as a medium to express emotions and sentiments that are sometimes hard to put into words. In many cultures, gifts are used to celebrate milestones, such as birthdays and weddings, to honor achievements, or to express condolences during times of loss. They help maintain social relationships and foster a sense of community. Gifts also serve as a mechanism for reciprocity, helping to establish and maintain social norms and expectations.

The Psychological Impact of Gifts

Economic implications of gift-giving.

Gift-giving also has significant economic implications. It stimulates economic activity by creating demand for goods and services. The gift industry, encompassing various sectors like retail, packaging, and logistics, contributes significantly to the global economy. However, it also brings to light the concept of ‘deadweight loss’, an economic phenomenon where the value of the gift to the recipient is less than its cost to the giver. This highlights the importance of thoughtful gift selection to maximize value for both the giver and the receiver.

Gifts in the Digital Age

The advent of the digital age has transformed the landscape of gift-giving. E-gifting, gift cards, and online wish-lists have added a new dimension to the tradition of gift exchange. These digital innovations offer convenience and personalization, allowing individuals to give and receive gifts that truly align with their preferences. Yet, they also raise questions about the impersonality of digital gifts and the potential loss of the emotional connection inherent in traditional gift-giving.

If you’re looking for more, here are essays on other interesting topics:

Understanding the brain science behind giving and receiving gifts

The acts of giving and receiving gifts activate core areas of the brain associated with reward and pleasure, says associate professor Jessica Andrews-Hanna.

The hustle and bustle of the holiday season is upon us and part of the holiday cheer revolves around exchanging gifts.

The acts of giving and receiving gifts encompass many emotions. Spending money on others brings happiness to the gift-giver , studies say. In fact, psychologists have confirmed that the warm glow of kindness, the feel-good rush after being kind to others, is real . A 2019 study says that people who give benefit regardless of whether they gain something from gifting others.

Jessica Andrews-Hanna.

In this Q&A, Jessica Andrews-Hanna , an associate professor in the Department of Psychology , in the College of Science , discusses in detail the psychology and neuroscience behind giving and receiving gifts.

Q: What happens to our brain when we gift others?

A: There is a decent amount of research showing that the act of giving actually makes us feel better. Evidence from brain imaging also suggests that both giving gifts and receiving gifts activate core areas of our brain associated with reward and pleasure. These brain regions also stimulate the neurotransmitter dopamine. All in all, psychology and neuroscience suggest that giving gifts to other people can be a very rewarding phenomenon that can bring happiness to ourselves and others. In order to maximize the benefits of gift giving, however, it will be important to take time to savor the act and not let the holiday season turn into a source of stress, as can sometimes happen when things get busy.

There is also a related area of research involving compassion that I think nicely intersects with giving gifts.

Q: How exactly is being compassionate related to giving gifts?

A: When we feel compassionate toward another person, we are often motivated to do something nice for that person, such as to help them relieve their suffering. There is a growing body of research suggesting that feeling close to someone, or caring deeply for them, involves considering this person as part of ourselves, and enhances our willingness to engage in an act of kindness for that person. And vice versa, when we do something nice for another person, we feel closer to that person as a result.

What this all means is that when we are kind to others, we are, in a way, being kind to ourselves. There is a psychological term called "vicarious reward" that suggests that when we witness something positive happening to another person, we vicariously feel in that person's pleasure, too. We can capitalize on this phenomenon by making ourselves happy by doing good deeds for others, including by giving gifts.

We all know people who exemplify what it means to live a life of compassion. Some people have spent thousands of hours training in a kind of meditation called "compassion meditation" or "loving kindness meditation," which involves sending love, kindness and warm thoughts to others. When these compassion experts send thoughts of love to other people, their brain lights up with dopamine and they feel happy. The good news is that we can all train ourselves to become more compassionate. In fact, the University of Arizona has a Center for Compassion Studies that offers regular workshops on this topic.

Q: What happens when we see someone open our gift?

A: This is an understudied area in psychology and neuroscience. We give gifts to other people because we expect that our gifts will bring others happiness. In this sense, we would presumably derive the most personal pleasure if we knew that our gifts were well received. Giving the perfect gift involves a process called perspective-taking, where we might mentally put ourselves in another person's shoes and imagine what would bring us happiness if we were that person. Perspective-taking is a kind of empathy often referred to as "cognitive empathy," and is considered a key ingredient of compassion. Ultimately, however, regardless of whether or not people receive the perfect gift, many people just like to know that they are on your mind. In many cases, it's the thought that counts.

Q: We often come across the term "warm glow of giving." Can you elaborate on that?

A: The "warm glow of giving" is a theory that suggests that when we give something to others, it leaves a warm fuzzy feeling in ourselves that persists over time and creates a glow of kindness about us. We can create this warm glow not just by giving physical gifts, but by engaging in other acts of kindness like complimenting others and telling others how much they mean to us. This process can also extend beyond the giver and recipient; when we do something nice for another person, the other person may be more apt to pay it forward. I think today's society would especially benefit from experiencing more of a warm glow this holiday season. This warm glow could help combat the rise in interpersonal conflict and mental health challenges. A big dose of kindness would help bring people closer together and spread more happiness around.

Resources for the Media

Niranjana Rajalakshmi Science Writer, University Communications [email protected] 917-415-3497

Jessica Andrews-Hanna Department of Psychology [email protected]

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For Gift Giving, Research Shows It's the Thought That Counts

Bailey Mariner / Verywell

Key Takeaways

Gift givers often mistake value over thoughtfulness as being most appreciated by gift recipients.
Research shows that gift givers overestimate how much a recipient’s liking of their gift increases or decreases when it compares favorably or unfavorably to other gifts.
Sharing the story behind a gift and not comparing your gift to others can make gift buying less stressful.

Finding the right gift can be stressful , especially when the receiver will be opening gifts from others, such as at birthdays, winter holidays, graduations, retirement parties, and bridal and baby showers.

“A lot of times, we tend to give things that will make for a great time when the bow comes off, but what people actually want to receive, if you ask them, are things that are not great in the moment, but great down the line, from a long-term perspective,” Julian Givi , PhD, assistant professor of marketing at West Virginia University, tells Verywell.

Givi led research that examined 12 studies about gift-giving. Researchers discovered that gift givers overestimate how much a recipient’s liking of their gift increases or decreases when it compares favorably or unfavorably to other gifts.

This is driven by the giver’s incorrect assumption that recipients appreciate the value of a gift over its thoughtfulness.

Julian Givi, PhD

When you are receiving something, you’re not too worried about how the gift compares in cost to other gifts because you are focused on the idea and thought. You’ll like it despite what others give you.

“When you are receiving something, you’re not too worried about how the gift compares in cost to other gifts because you are focused on the idea and thought. You’ll like it despite what others give you,” says Givi.

Mistaking Cost for Value

Givi points out that all people involved in gift-giving and receiving focus on thoughtfulness, but will incorrectly believe that others focus on relative gift value. Because of this misconception, when givers know beforehand that others will be giving gifts at the same occasion, they are more likely to spend more money upgrading their gifts, or skip the gift-giving occasion.

For example, if a gift giver plans to give a $25 gift card, but knows someone will give a $50 gift card, they are more likely to one up, as opposed to knowing someone will give only a $5 gift card.

Givi says this happens for two reasons.

“First is that in relation to the $50 gift card, I think my $25 gift isn’t going to be liked much, so as a giver, I’m going to want to make the person happy and upping it might do the job. Second, I don’t want to look bad. Basically, it could be a negative experience for you if you don’t like it and a negative experience for me because I might look embarrassed, and that might not make for a good time for everyone,” explains Givi.

Kathleen Vohs , PhD, chair in marketing at the University of Minnesota, adds that gift value is easily understood and comparable.

“Meaning that we grasp whether one gift was costlier than another…so if you want to choose a gift that’s not likely to make the receiver unhappy, choosing an expensive one is safe,” Vohs says.

By contrast, she says thoughtfulness is vague.

“[A] gift considered to be rather unthoughtful to one person wouldn’t be considered the same for another, so gift givers may not be very sure what it means to buy a gift for thoughtfulness,” says Vohs.

Because what the gift giver thinks is a thoughtful gift may not be perceived that way to the receiver, she says the risk of choosing the wrong gift is higher, especially when compared to buying for price.

Since gift givers are often gift recipients at some point, can’t they just tap into their gift receiving side?

Givi says it’s not that easy.

“When in one role, it is not easy to take a step back and think, ‘What would it be like if I were in the other role?’ We just aren't hard-wired to do so, much like we don't take the time to think about the other person's perspective when in an argument or a negotiation,” he says.

However, Givi’s research shows that when givers are forced to think of themselves as a gift recipient when buying a gift, they often make better choices.

Vohs, agrees, noting that it’s challenging to really know what someone else thinks or wants.

Kathleen Vohs, PhD

As a gift giver, I could choose a gift that would be thoughtful if I were receiving it, but that may not be what the other person would think is thoughtful.

"I may think it was very thoughtful to have my romantic partner make me a card, whereas if I did that for my partner, they may have preferred that we have a unique experience together," she says. "Meaning, as a gift giver, I could choose a gift that would be thoughtful if I were receiving it, but that may not be what the other person would think is thoughtful."

Tips for Buying a Gift

To take the stress out of gift giving, consider the following:

Forget About the Unveiling

Rather than envisioning the moment when the recipient opens your gift, Givi says think about the days, weeks, months, and years ahead in which they will think about using the gift.

“That could be practical, useful, sentimental, something that might grow with time, such as if a family has a baby, rather than giving them infant clothes, it would be more useful to give them older clothes that will fit when the child is say 2 to 4 years old,” he says.

Share the Story Behind Your Gift

To take the focus off the cost of a gift, Vohs suggests conveying how much you tried to find the right gift, without bragging.

“That way, even if choosing a gift that doesn’t, on the surface, come off as very thoughtful, the receiver can get a sense of the effort and intention behind it,” she says.

Don’t Compare Your Gift to Others'

Buy the gift you think is best suited, and don’t worry about how it will compare to what other people give.

“[Also], don’t adjust your spending level based on this concern, as recipients' liking of gifts does not depend on comparisons ,” says Givi.

Put Yourself in the Receiver’s Shoes

As hard as it can be, Vohs says imagine how you feel and think when receiving gifts.

“The more that you can be happy and grateful when you are receiving a gift, the more you may realize that, in general, people are going to be fine with whatever you get them,” she says.

Consider Monetary Gifts

While givers often avoid giving monetary gifts, Givi says recipients are open to receiving them.

“That fits the idea of exchange versus ownership. As a giver, giving someone $20 dollars seems like a lame birthday present, but as a recipient it might be more useful to me than a shirt down the road; I can buy whatever I want,” he says.

Gift Out of the Blue

While we often give gifts on holidays and birthdays, we rarely give people gifts unexpectedly.

“If you give me something on my birthday, I may be a little sensitive to what the gift is. If you give me something on a Tuesday, I’ll love it no matter what,” says Givi. “These gifts are well received. They make the person feel thought about and cared for.”

What This Means For You

The stress of gift giving can turn to joy when you realize that gift recipients appreciate the thoughtfulness of a gift over its value.

Givi J, Galak B, Olivolab C. The thought that counts is the one we ignore: How givers overestimate the importance of relative gift value . Journal of Business Research . 2021. doi:10.1016/j.jbusres.2020.10.009

By Cathy Cassata Cathy Cassata is a freelance writer who specializes in stories around health, mental health, medical news, and inspirational people.

Giving versus receiving

Is it better to give or to receive?

All the Yes points:

Receiving gifts from others can be nice but it is much more satisfying to see the pleasure that the …, giving more gifts than you receive is good for your social status. traditionally gift exchange has …, how many of the gifts we receive are truly welcome anyway most presents we get given simply reveal…, in the developed west, we all have too much stuff anyway – more books, music, clothes, hardware and …, it may briefly be fun to get presents, but for well-brought up people everywhere the pleasure of rec…, choosing presents for other people is an excellent excuse for going shopping. visiting shopping mal…, all the no points:, yes because….

Receiving gifts from others can be nice but it is much more satisfying to see the pleasure that the gifts you have chosen give to others. Covetousness (desiring material possessions) can only be temporarily satisfied even by opening a whole stack of presents, but the warm glow of a truly altruistic (unselfish) act lasts much longer. Even young children learn that it is fun to see the pleasure mummy gets when they give her something they have made at kindergarten. And now scientists have proved the connection, using brain scans to show that giving someone else a gift results in more activity in the parts of the brain associated with happiness than receiving a gift from someone else. This is further supported by a Harvard Business School study which found that, for a given level of income, those who gave away more of their money were on average happier.

No because…

Everybody says that giving presents is better, but everyone secretly prefers to receive them. We all love the excitement of opening a parcel, the thrill of surprise and acquisition, and the glow of knowing the giver cares for you. Really, the only reason we bother to traipse round stores sorting out presents for other people is because if we didn’t provide presents for others, we wouldn’t get so many ourselves. The trick, of course, is to make sure that overall you gain from the overall gift exchange. In this way, we are all “homo economicus”, the rational economic actor who always seeks to maximise the value of what they own. And for young people, receiving presents is especially important – it is the greatest single way in which economic resources are transferred down through the generations. The young simply can’t afford financially to give presents that are worth as much as those they receive, and frankly, they wouldn’t want to anyway.

Giving more gifts than you receive is good for your social status. Traditionally gift exchange has been an important part of social relationships in many societies, with those who give the most presents to others signalling their higher position in society. A patron who gives gifts to others who cannot reciprocate in kind establishes their economic superiority, and places the recipients in a socially-indebted, client relationship to the giver. In this way, it is definitely more advantageous to give than to receive, and even in a modern society the generous gift-giver can establish a beneficial network of relationships that may help them achieve business or social success throughout the rest of the year.

Society today is much more egalitarian than the feudal structures of the past. No one who calculates the net gain or loss in status from gift exchange will ever really be happy with their place in society. It is much better to accept each gift gratefully, seeing it as a symbol of how much others love and value you. We can never truly know the mind of another person, so we can’t know exactly how much joy our presents have given them. But we can know our own minds and take pleasure in the loving gifts of others. In this way, it is indeed better to receive than to give.

How many of the gifts we receive are truly welcome anyway? Most presents we get given simply reveal how little our friends or relations really know about our tastes. From sweaters we will never wear, to books we will never read and music we will never listen to, what we receive is often not what we want. At least when we give gifts we have some control over the process and can hope that they will be welcome. By contrast, the process of opening others gifts to us is inevitably tinged with disappointment.

It is just as true that the presents we give are often not wanted by the recipients, so this argument cuts both ways. In fact, studies have found that the value people put on the gifts they receive is usually considerably lower than the amount they cost the giver to purchase. But there is a solution; just as it might be a good idea to ask those you are buying for what they actually want (yes, really), so you can help them in turn. Simply leave a few relevant catalogues lying around the house, perhaps with helpful asterisks against desirable items, or, for your more web-savvy relatives, try emailing them the URLs of appropriate online retailers’ choicer items. After undertaking such helpful preparation work, you will truly deserve to enjoy receiving the resulting presents!

In the developed west, we all have too much stuff anyway – more books, music, clothes, hardware and electronics than our grandparents could even have imagined when they were our age. So most gifts we receive make very little difference to our comfortable lives, other than providing yet another thing to be found room for. Some people even pay experts to help them “de-clutter” their houses and lives by getting rid of the vast mass of unnecessary stuff that surrounds them – much of it, no doubt, given to them by well-meaning friends and relatives as gifts. For such people, giving without having to receive in return is definitely preferable.

Who says you can ever have too much stuff? Whatever you have in life, it is always nice to have more – in evolutionary terms, it allows us to hoard resources against an uncertain tomorrow. Often others know us better than ourselves and give us presents we would not have thought of for ourselves, surprising us with their thoughtfulness and challenging us through their gift to try new things. And friends and relatives can also give us things that we have really wanted, but which we could not justify buying for ourselves.

It may briefly be fun to get presents, but for well-brought up people everywhere the pleasure of receiving is tainted by the demands of good manners. When you receive presents you have to go through the dreaded ritual of writing thank-you notes (or worse, forcing your children to write them!). Few indeed are the gifts that make this burden worthwhile, which is why most middle-class people enjoy giving other people presents much more than they like receiving them.

What a miserable, bourgeois and thoroughly uptight outlook on life. First, lighten up and enjoy the moment. Second, please don’t inflict your own hang-ups on your kids. After all, it’s a present! You didn’t have to earn it. Someone gave it to you because they like you. Isn’t that great? Doesn’t it make you want to thank the person who gave it to you? Maybe instead of writing you should call them to express your gratitude. There, that wasn’t so hard, was it?

Choosing presents for other people is an excellent excuse for going shopping. Visiting shopping malls and department stores has become the most popular leisure activity in the developed world, but there is still an unfortunate stigma attached to consumption for its own sake. But no one can criticise you for heading for the warmth, colour, bright lights and food courts of the nearest retail centre if you are doing it for others.

Shopping is an exhausting and depressing experience, even if some of it is done online these days. It is slow, expensive and frustrating, with so much choice between so many types of essentially pointless objects, sold to you by inept, uncaring salespeople amid heaving and unhygienic crowds. What is the purpose of all this conspicuous consumption anyway? Certainly it would be better to forget about shopping for gifts one Christmas, and be happy that the people who give you things slogged round stores instead of you. Even if you got given fewer presents next year it would still be worth it.

We would love to hear what you think – please leave a comment!

Greater Good Science Center • Magazine • In Action • In Education

Five Ways Giving Is Good for You

Holiday shopping can be terrifying, yes. But research suggests it’s worth it: New studies attest to the benefits of giving—not just for the recipients but for the givers’ health and happiness, and for the strength of entire communities.

Of course, you don’t have to shop to reap the benefits of giving. Research suggests the same benefits come from donating to charities or volunteering your time, like at a soup kitchen or a homeless shelter. Here are some of the ways that giving is good for you and your community.

1. Giving makes us feel happy. A 2008 study by Harvard Business School professor Michael Norton and colleagues found that giving money to someone else lifted participants’ happiness more that spending it on themselves (despite participants’ prediction that spending on themselves would make them happier). Happiness expert Sonja Lyubomirsky, a professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside, saw similar results when she asked people to perform five acts of kindness each week for six weeks.

These good feelings are reflected in our biology. In a 2006 study, Jorge Moll and colleagues at the National Institutes of Health found that when people give to charities, it activates regions of the brain associated with pleasure, social connection, and trust, creating a “warm glow” effect. Scientists also believe that altruistic behavior releases endorphins in the brain, producing the positive feeling known as the “helper’s high.”

2. Giving is good for our health. A wide range of research has linked different forms of generosity to better health, even among the sick and elderly. In his book Why Good Things Happen to Good People , Stephen Post, a professor of preventative medicine at Stony Brook University, reports that giving to others has been shown to increase health benefits in people with chronic illness, including HIV and multiple sclerosis.

A 1999 study led by Doug Oman of the University of California, Berkeley, found that elderly people who volunteered for two or more organizations were 44 percent less likely to die over a five-year period than were non-volunteers, even after controlling for their age, exercise habits, general health, and negative health habits like smoking. Stephanie Brown of the University of Michigan saw similar results in a 2003 study on elderly couples. She and her colleagues found that those individuals who provided practical help to friends, relatives, or neighbors, or gave emotional support to their spouses, had a lower risk of dying over a five-year period than those who didn’t. Interestingly, receiving help wasn’t linked to a reduced death risk.

Researchers suggest that one reason giving may improve physical health and longevity is that it helps decrease stress, which is associated with a variety of health problems. In a 2006 study by Rachel Piferi of Johns Hopkins University and Kathleen Lawler of the University of Tennessee, people who provided social support to others had lower blood pressure than participants who didn’t, suggesting a direct physiological benefit to those who give of themselves.

3. Giving promotes cooperation and social connection. When you give, you’re more likely to get back: Several studies, including work by sociologists Brent Simpson and Robb Willer, have suggested that when you give to others, your generosity is likely to be rewarded by others down the line—sometimes by the person you gave to, sometimes by someone else.

These exchanges promote a sense of trust and cooperation that strengthens our ties to others—and research has shown that having positive social interactions is central to good mental and physical health. As researcher John Cacioppo writes in his book Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection , “The more extensive the reciprocal altruism born of social connection . . . the greater the advance toward health, wealth, and happiness.”

What’s more, when we give to others, we don’t only make them feel closer to us; we also feel closer to them. “Being kind and generous leads you to perceive others more positively and more charitably,” writes Lyubomirsky in her book The How of Happiness , and this “fosters a heightened sense of interdependence and cooperation in your social community.”

4. Giving evokes gratitude. Whether you’re on the giving or receiving end of a gift, that gift can elicit feelings of gratitude—it can be a way of expressing gratitude or instilling gratitude in the recipient. And research has found that gratitude is integral to happiness, health, and social bonds.

Robert Emmons and Michael McCullough, co-directors of the Research Project on Gratitude and Thankfulness, found that teaching college students to “count their blessings” and cultivate gratitude caused them to exercise more, be more optimistic, and feel better about their lives overall. A recent study led by Nathaniel Lambert at Florida State University found that expressing gratitude to a close friend or romantic partner strengthens our sense of connection to that person.

Barbara Fredrickson, a pioneering happiness researcher, suggests that cultivating gratitude in everyday life is one of the keys to increasing personal happiness. “When you express your gratitude in words or actions, you not only boost your own positivity but [other people’s] as well,” she writes in her book Positivity . “And in the process you reinforce their kindness and strengthen your bond to one another.”

5. Giving is contagious. When we give, we don’t only help the immediate recipient of our gift. We also spur a ripple effect of generosity through our community.

A study by James Fowler of the University of California, San Diego, and Nicholas Christakis of Harvard, published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science , shows that when one person behaves generously, it inspires observers to behave generously later, toward different people. In fact, the researchers found that altruism could spread by three degrees—from person to person to person to person. “As a result,” they write, “each person in a network can influence dozens or even hundreds of people, some of whom [they do] not know and [have] not met.” ] Giving has also been linked to the release of oxytocin, a hormone (also released during sex and breast feeding) that induces feelings of warmth, euphoria, and connection to others. In laboratory studies, Paul Zak, the director of the Center for Neuroeconomics Studies at Claremont Graduate University, has found that a dose of oxytocin will cause people to give more generously and to feel more empathy towards others, with “symptoms” lasting up to two hours. And those people on an “oxytocin high” can potentially jumpstart a “virtuous circle, where one person’s generous behavior triggers another’s,” says Zak.

So whether you buy gifts, volunteer your time, or donate money to charity this holiday season, your giving is much more than just a year-end chore. It may help you build stronger social connections and even jumpstart a cascade of generosity through your community. And don’t be surprised if you find yourself benefiting from a big dose of happiness in the process.

About the Authors

Jill Suttie

Jill Suttie, Psy.D. , is Greater Good ’s former book review editor and now serves as a staff writer and contributing editor for the magazine. She received her doctorate of psychology from the University of San Francisco in 1998 and was a psychologist in private practice before coming to Greater Good .

Jason Marsh

Jason Marsh is the executive director of the Greater Good Science Center and the editor in chief of Greater Good .

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This is a thoughtful entry. I’m used to hearing that giving makes you happy and that it is healthy, but there are many other benefits.

In fact, giving is so good for us that I can think of several other benefits right off the bat: Giving can actually alleviate minor mental illness. Certain forms of it, like formal volunteering, can help you create a winning resume or application for something. Giving can result in personal growth. Giving can help you be a good role model to the young people in your life. And most importantly, giving makes the world a better place for us all to live in. If everyone did their part, maybe we could all reduce the amount of crime, violence, prejudice, and suffering.

Amanda | 5:38 am, January 8, 2011 | Link

“Giving has also been linked to the release of oxytocin, a hormone (also released during sex and breast feeding) that induces feelings of warmth, euphoria, and connection to others. “

I love it! I am forwarding this article to my husby to answer his complains on not enough sex. He is not giving me enough!

Club Wear | 10:41 pm, January 10, 2011 | Link

Wow. I’m really glad I found this article and this site. I’ve been looking for some solid research on why we should give and encourage the act of giving and this site is excellent.

“A 1999 study led by Doug Oman of the University of California, Berkeley, found that elderly people who volunteered for two or more organizations were 44 percent less likely to die over a five-year period than were non-volunteers, even after controlling for their age, exercise habits, general health, and negative health habits like smoking.”

I would love to get this into the minds of general society. How often do we hear about driven people who work all their lives, but quickly die once they retire?

Perhaps engaging voluntary work would not only benefit others, but also prolong the life of the volunteer.

Darren | 12:09 am, August 7, 2011 | Link

I’m a millionaire and I often help my employees during financial hardship. I prefer to spend on others rather than myself.

Mike | 1:28 pm, January 16, 2013 | Link

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A Neuroscientist Explains Why It's Better to Give Than to Receive

Generosity offers a range of neurological and psychological benefits, but not all gifting is equal..

The belief that “it’s better to give than to receive” can be traced back at least as far as the Bible. But while the sentiment is often understood as a moral lesson, there’s also a vast amount of scientific support for the benefits of generosity. As gift-giving ramps up amid the holiday season, those wondering how they end up spending so much might be interested to learn that generosity offers a wide range of benefits — neurological, psychological and even evolutionary.

“Studies of generosity in the human brain have revealed several regions involved in these behaviors,” says Catherine Franssen, a neuroscientist at Longwood University and the Science Museum of Virginia.

She points to a study published in Nature Communications in 2017, led by investigators at the University of Zurich in Switzerland, that compared subjects’ brain activity while spending money on themselves or on others. Those that spent on others had increased activity in the temporal parietal junction and ventral striatum, parts of the brain associated with empathy and happiness respectively.

“The connectivity between these two parts of the brain was modulated by the generosity that subjects showed in the experimental task,” said Thorsten Kahnt, a co-author of the study, in a press release . “And what’s interesting is that the signal of the striatum itself was directly related to increases in happiness.”

Other studies have linked generous behaviors with activity in the reward regions of the brain, such as the nucleus accumbens, and an increase in dopamine (the neurotransmitter involved in motivation and pleasure). Researchers have also found that behaving generously can trigger neural patterns similar to those triggered by parental behavior. This may seem intuitive, considering that generous actions often mirror the selfless behaviors required for childrearing.

“The act of giving is rewarding to the brain and makes us feel good,” Franssen says. “Interestingly, these brain connections can take a bit longer to develop, which is why children and adolescents aren’t quite as excited about giving as receiving, but most adults make the transition.”

It's Not Just for Humans

The evolutionary value of generosity, and the social bonds it strengthens, isn’t limited to humans. The act of giving — for example, when animals give “nuptial gifts” to their potential mates — helps develop trust. Franssen gives the examples of penguins gifting rocks or male spiders who might give a “web-wrapped bug meal to a partner to tempt her not to eat him.”

Read More: Humans Aren’t the Only Animals That Give Gifts

Generosity can help to develop platonic relationships as well, as some species give gifts to strengthen friendships; bonobos, for example, have been found to gift fruit to potential new friends . Just as humans make mental notes of the behaviors of those around them, other animals develop keen awareness of who shares their supplies and who hoards it.

“Vampire bats are quite tiny and need to eat nightly or risk starvation, and will generously share a blood meal with other generous bats, but not with bats that have been selfish in the past,” Franssen says. “Several species, including humans , rate generosity as an attractive trait, and some individuals make sure they display generosity when they can be observed. Whether observed or not, gift giving can develop many kinds of social bonds and the emotional rewards of receiving a gift can heighten the experience with someone and enhance your memories of that person.”

Not All Giving Is Equal

How one gives (and to whom) can, of course, impact how rewarding the experience is.

Anyone who has felt moved to make a donation after hearing about a person’s particular plight has experienced the “ identifiable victim effect .” This term describes our tendency to expend resources to help specific individuals rather than a general group — for example, giving more when shown an individual orphan rather than an anonymous silhouette, as a 2013 study demonstrated. The neuroscientists behind the study found that certain regions of the brain were activated when participants looked at another person’s face, leading them to feel a greater sense of empathy and subsequent desire to help.

Extending this concept further, humans have also been found to be more generous with those they perceive to share their own values, interests or physical appearance. Studies on this “ ingroup favoritism effect ” found that subjects spent more time thinking about their decision and examining potential recipients of their giving when in-group members were involved.

“The indications are that those who are generous may have a stronger neurobiological reward response to giving; it makes them happier and they feel that much better when they give,” Franssen says. “Some individuals feel very strongly about gifting to their family or in-group but are not generous to strangers, while others are more stingy or generous across all groups.”

Franssen points to new neuroscience work that has identified specific regions within our prefrontal cortex that seem to control these deliberations and limit our generosity. “Individual variance also exists in our neural empathy, the amount of activation in certain regions of the brain that indicate that we can feel what someone else feels,” she adds.

Whether we’re giving elaborate gifts, charitable donations or “web-wrapped bug meals,” there’s plenty of scientific support for the belief that generosity is good for us.

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December 16, 2023

Why Do We Give Gifts? An Anthropologist Explains This Ancient Human Behavior

Gifts play an important role in human relationships and are about more than consumerism

By Chip Colwell & The Conversation US

Woman's arms in brown sweater holding gift wrapped in green paper with orange bow on black backdrop

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The following essay is reprinted with permission from The Conversation , an online publication covering the latest research.

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To me as an anthropologist , this is an especially powerful question because giving gifts likely has ancient roots . And gifts can be found in every known culture around the world.

So, what explains the power of the present?

But of all the explanations for why people give gifts, the one I find most convincing was offered in 1925 by a French anthropologist named Marcel Mauss .

Giving, receiving, reciprocating

Like many anthropologists, Mauss was puzzled by societies in which gifts were extravagantly given away.

Mauss observed that gifts create three separate but inextricably related actions. Gifts are given, received and reciprocated.

The first act of giving establishes the virtues of the gift giver. They express their generosity, kindness and honor.

In these ways, gifting tethers people together. It keeps people connected in an infinite cycle of mutual obligations.

Giving better gifts

Are modern-day consumers unknowingly embodying Mauss’ theory a little too well? After all, many people today suffer not from the lack of gifts, but from an overabundance.

Gallup reports that the average American holiday shopper estimates they’ll spend US$975 on presents in 2023 , the highest amount since this survey began in 1999.

Quality gifts can speak to your values and more meaningfully sustain your relationships.

This article was originally published on The Conversation . Read the original article .

Giving Really Is Better than Receiving

Does giving to others (compared to oneself) promote happiness.

Posted December 25, 2010 | Reviewed by Abigail Fagan

During the holiday season, one custom that is shared across many religious and cultural traditions ranging from Christmas to Hanukkah to Kwanzaa is the act of giving to others.

For instance, we often hear the phrase "it is more blessed to give than to receive" (Acts 20:35) quoted a lot during this time of year. Although holiday gift-giving has often become associated with shopping aggravations and as a key indicator of the economy's general state of health, there is considerable evidence in support of this frequently-cited biblical passage.

Science supports the benefits of giving.

For example, research by social psychologist Liz Dunn and her colleagues appearing in the journal Science shows that people's sense of happiness is greater when they spend relatively more on others than on themselves.

In one survey of over 600 U.S. citizens, Dunn and colleagues found that spending money on others predicted greater happiness whereas spending money on oneself did not, and this pattern was found across all income levels. In other words, even those with little money reported greater happiness when their proportion of spending on others, relative to the self, was greater.

In a more controlled experiment, Dunn and colleagues gave students at the University of British Columbia an envelope containing money and told them that they either (1) had to spend the money on themselves before 5 p.m. that day or (2) had to spend the money on someone else before 5 p.m. Those who gifted for others were happier than those who gifted for themselves.

In some cases, there were 5 dollars in the envelope and in other cases there were 20 dollars. The amount didn't matter — the results were the same. Spending on others made people happier than spending on themselves. Ironically, when asked to predict which outcome would make one happier (i.e., spending on oneself or spending on others), another group of students at the same university thought spending on themselves would make them happier than spending on others.

In short, people's selfish assumptions were proven wrong when they actually had the opportunity to give to others.

Transcendental leaders support the benefits of giving.

In addition to solid scientific evidence supporting the benefits of giving to others, it's not surprising to see that many of the most prominent transcendental leaders emphasize the importance giving in their teachings.

For example, emphasizing the Buddhist principle of dependent origination, the Dalai Lama notes that one's own happiness is dependent on the happiness of others. In his book Ethics for the New Millennium , the Dalai Lama observes that happiness does not come from material things but rather from a deep, genuine concern for others' happiness. In fact, the Dalai Lama contends that focusing on one's own needs instead of others' results in negative emotions that prevent true and lasting happiness for the self.

Similarly, one of my favorite quotes from Mahatma Gandhi regarding self-understanding is, "The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others."

And lastly, and to bring things full circle with Christian gospel this holiday season, the value of giving to others was one of the themes reiterated by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. In arguably his finest sermon, The Drum Major Instinct , King notes that personal greatness and service to others are intertwined. In a world filled with people's selfish endeavors and nations' destructive engagement in war and violence, King emphasized that a desire to be the best (the drum major) can be transformed from a selfish impulse to an instrument for justice if people adopt service to others as their goal. In King's poignant words, "Everybody can be great, because everyone can serve."

It is fitting that when King delivered this sermon to his congregation at Atlanta's Ebenezer Baptist Church exactly two months before he was assassinated, he emphasized that he hoped he would simply be remembered as a man who tried to help others, serve others, and give to others. For someone who was an accomplished international leader , it is poignant that in the end, King recognized the most powerful and enduring statement about one's life is not personal accolades such as winning Nobel Prizes but rather living a life of service to others.

During this holiday season, let's not lose sight of the value of giving to others. It does not matter whether you give a lot or a little, give gifts or intangible things. What matters most for meaningful happiness is appreciating the importance of those around you — family, friends, and community — and do so each and every day of the year, not simply on Christmas morning.

Allen R. McConnell , Ph.D. , is the James and Beth Lewis Professor of Psychology at Miami University.

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Why Gift-Giving Makes You Anxious

H ow could anyone dislike giving and receiving gifts? A good gift can be totally life-changing. For example, the toy basketball hoop that LeBron James received for Christmas in 1987 arguably changed the course of NBA history. Likewise, a lovely commercial from John Lewis & Partners, a chain of high-end department stores in the UK, has convinced me that a Christmas time piano is what launched Elton John’s career. (Some fact-checkers have raised questions about that sequence of events, but I’m not here for that kind of “Bah! Humbug” energy.)

Gifts are so meaningful that some people identify “receiving gifts” as their primary “love language.” Many believe that gifts from their romantic partner are a big way they can understand how much their partner loves them. Indeed, on the surface, gift-giving occasions seem like wonderful opportunities to experience and create delight. But according to a 2023 survey by Preply, gift-giving and receiving is actually the least popular love language overall.

This begs the question: Why do most people say that gift-giving stresses them out?

Read More: 10 Thoughtful Gifts That Don’t Cost a Thing

Part of the problem is that occasions that involve gift giving are steeped in uncertainty. If it’s an occasion like Christmas, where people are simultaneously shopping for each other, people might be nervous about whether the gift they give will be in the same category as the gift they will also receive. For instance, you don’t want to give someone a gag gift when they’re giving you a sincere, heartfelt gift—or vice versa. It’s what game theorists call a “coordination game”: your main objective is simply to use whatever strategy you think your partner is using. Mismatched approaches to gift-giving are a recipe for awkwardness. Fans of The Office might recall how Michael’s outlandish Yankee Swap gift—an iPod (highly coveted at the time)—made the entire event uncomfortable for everyone.

There can also be tremendous uncertainty around how your gift will be experienced by the recipient. For example, imagine that someone you’re close to is showing some signs of Seasonal Affective Disorder, and you’re considering giving them a light therapy lamp as a holiday gift. Indeed, the recipient of such a gift may very well be appreciative, indicating that this is “just what they needed.” At least, that’s how it’s all likely to unfold in the hopeful imagination of the lamp-giver. But what if the lamp-recipient interprets the gift as an unwelcome piece of commentary on their affective state? One could imagine a reaction along the lines of “Gosh, I’m sorry I’ve been so unpleasant to be around. Thanks for the feedback.” The message we send with gifts (or emails, texts, or just about any form of communication) is not necessarily the same as the message received.

Another issue is that there are just so many opportunities to get gift-giving wrong. For example, if you’re a married parent in the U.S., you’ll likely need to navigate at least five gift-giving occasions per year: your spouse’s birthday, your anniversary, Valentine's Day, perhaps Mother's and Father's Day, and the December holidays. Eventually, you’re probably going to give a bad gift, and that bad gift might overshadow the many good gifts you’ve given. The stench of a bad gift can linger. That’s because of a bedrock principle of behavioral science known as loss aversion . The idea, simply put, is that bad outcomes have a stronger psychological impact than comparable good outcomes. Few baseball fans remember all the ground balls that Bill Buckner fielded cleanly, but many remember the one that went through his legs .

Even if you’re a wonderful chooser of gifts, you might feel stressed about everything involved in the acquisition and delivery of those gifts. The prospect of navigating mall parking lots, crowded stores, and long lines at the post office fills me with dread. Much can be done online, of course, but some combination of procrastination, insufficient shipping speed, and imperfect product availability drives many of us back into brick-and-mortar stores. And then there’s all the gift wrapping. Gift wrap is an essential part of gift-giving, and I love a beautifully wrapped gift. But I personally find the wrapping process to be deeply frustrating, and this sentiment appears to be widely shared .

Worst of all, there’s the anxiety that comes with receiving gifts. If you’re anything like me, you may have, on occasion, found yourself in a setting where you expect that a lot of well-meaning but disappointing gifts are headed your way. There can be some dread that comes with knowing that you’ll soon need to perform joy and appreciation. Even worse, you might worry that the gift-giver will detect your insincerity, wounding them in the process.

It’s not all bad, of course. When done carefully, gift-giving can be a wonderful way to communicate to loved ones that we appreciate and understand them. Gifts can absolutely draw people closer together, in a lasting way. And, as a huge basketball fan, I’m just so glad LeBron got that basketball hoop when he was three years old. That was truly a gift for all of us.

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Learn What to Say in English When You Give or Receive a Gift

ThoughtCo / Hilary Allison

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Every culture has its own customs for gift-giving, and there are special words and phrases for such occasions in every language, including in English. Whether you're new to the language or are fairly proficient, you can learn what to say when you're giving or receiving a gift in just about any situation.

Formal and Informal Situations

In much of the English-speaking world, it is customary to use the right tone when giving and receiving gifts. In informal situations, such as when you're with friends or family, gift-givers and their lucky recipients can both be casual or clever. Some people like to make a big fuss when they give and receive presents; others are very modest. The important thing is to be sincere. Speech tends to be more conservative in formal situations such as a wedding or a workplace or when giving or receiving a gift from someone you don't know well.

Phrases for Giving Gifts

Informal situations.

Here are some common informal phrases you can use when giving a gift to a close friend, a family member, or a loved one:

I got you something. I hope you like the gift ( or , I hope you like it).
Look what I have for you!
I thought you might like this for...
Happy Birthday! [Happy Anniversary!] Here's a little gift/present for you.
[Handing present to someone] Enjoy!
It's only something small, but I hope you like it.
Here's a little present for you.
Guess what I bought you!

Formal Situations

These are a few common phrases for gift-giving in formal settings, such as a wedding or a business dinner:

[Name], I'd like to give you this present/gift.
[Name], This is a present that I/we/staff got you.
I'd like to present you with this...(very formal, used when giving an award or special present)
In the name of [xyz], I'd like to give you this present. (also very formal)
Here is a token of our appreciation.

Phrases for Receiving Presents

A sincere "thank you" spoken with a smile is the only English phrase you really need when someone gives you a gift. But if you want to expand your vocabulary , you'll want to know some other phrases to use in different situations:

Thank you so much!
That's so kind!
You shouldn't have!
Thank you! It's beautiful.
I love it! I'll put it on/hang it up/... immediately.
That is so thoughtful of you. It matches my...perfectly!
How did you know I've always wanted a...to go with my...?
Thank you. I really needed a...
Fantastic! I've been thinking about getting a...
This is exactly what I needed. Now, I can...
How kind of you! I've always wanted to see...in concert/at the movies/at an exhibition.
Wow! This is a dream come true! Tickets for...
Thank you so much! I've hoped/wanted to travel to...for a long time.

Practice Dialogues

Now that you know more about what to say when you give or receive a present, practice the statements to keep your skills sharp. The following two dialogues are a good place to start. The first one is an informal setting between two people who know each other. The second dialogue is what you'd hear in a formal setting like an office.

Friend 2: Anna, hi! It's good to see you.

Friend 1: Hi Tammy! I got you something. I hope you it.

Friend 2: I'm sure I will. Let me open it!

Friend 1: It's only something small.

Friend 2: Come on, thank you so much!

Friend 1: Well, what do you think?

Friend 2: I love it! It matches my sweater!

Friend 1: I know. That's why I bought it.

Friend 2: How did you know I've always wanted a broach to go with this sweater?

Friend 1: I'm glad you like it.

Friend 2: Like it? I love it!

Colleague 1: Your attention, your attention! Tom, could you come over here?

Colleague 2: What's this?

Colleague 1: Tom, in the name of everybody here, I'd like to give you this token of our appreciation.

Colleague 2: Thank you, Bob. I'm so honored.

Colleague 1: We thought you might be able to use this at home.

Colleague 2: Let's see...let me open it.

Colleague 1: The suspense is killing us.

Colleague 2: You've wrapped it up so tightly! Oh, it's beautiful.

Colleague 1: What do you think?

Colleague 2: Thank you so much! This is exactly what I needed. Now I can get to work building that birdhouse.

Colleague 1: We had a little help from your wife. She told us about your love of woodworking.

Colleague 2: What a thoughtful gift. I'll put it to good use immediately.

Colleague 1: Thank you, Tom, for all you've done for this company.

Colleague 2: My pleasure, indeed.

Discussion Questions to Use in English Conversation
How to Say Good Night, Rest Well, and Good Morning in English
Past-Tense Regular Verb Pronunciation
Heart Idioms and Expressions
Tongue Twisters: "Woodchuck"
Voiced vs. Voiceless Consonants
How to Use 'It Depends' in Conversation
Word Pronunciation: Hard and Soft 'C' and 'G' Sounds
How to Improve Your Pronunciation
Content or Function Word? Pronunciation Practice
Asking for and Giving Directions in English
How to Ask Questions in English
Job Interviewing Example
How to Speak English
Stress Types in English Pronunciation
Interrupting in English

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Giving and receiving gifts is a common practice in many cultures around the world. People remember speacial gifts or presents that they receive. Why does this happen and what factors are kept in mind while giving gifts.

IELTS essay Giving and receiving gifts is a common practice in many cultures around the world. People remember speacial gifts or presents that they receive. Why does this happen and what factors are kept in mind while giving gifts.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors
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? Present relevant ideas
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