personal essay analysis

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Ultimate guide to writing a personal essay, carla johnson.

• June 14, 2023
• Essay Topics and Ideas , How to Guides

A personal essay is a type of creative nonfiction in which the writer tells the reader about their own thoughts, experiences, and feelings. In contrast to other types of essays that focus on research, analysis, or making an argument, a personal essay is more about thinking about yourself and what you want to say.

The point of a personal essay is to show who the writer is, what they’ve been through, and how they see the world. By sharing personal stories and thoughts, the writer can connect with the reader on a deeper level and give a unique and personal view on a certain topic or issue.

There are many reasons why personal essays are important. They let writers explore their own thoughts and feelings and share what they’ve learned with other people . Personal essays can also be a great way to help people understand and care about each other by giving them a window into the lives of others.

In this article , we’ll show you how to write a personal essay from start to finish, with 10 examples and ideas to get you started. We will talk about the basic structure of a personal essay and give you tips on how to tell a good story and connect with your audience.

Whether you’re a student who wants to improve your writing skills or a professional who wants to share your personal experiences and insights with others, this guide will give you the tools you need to write a compelling personal essay.

What You'll Learn

Elements of a Personal Essay

To write a compelling personal essay, it is important to include the following elements:

1. The importance of a clear theme: A clear theme provides focus and coherence to your personal essay. It should be a central idea that ties together all of the events and experiences you describe in your essay .

2. Creating a compelling introduction: Your introduction should grab the reader’s attention and provide a hook to draw them in. It should also introduce your theme and provide some context for the events and experiences you will describe in your essay .

3. Developing a narrative arc: A narrative arc is the structure that guides your personal essay. It should include a beginning, middle, and end, with a clear progression of events that build toward a climax and resolution.

4. Creating dynamic characters: Your personal essay should include characters that are well-developed and engaging. This can include yourself, as well as other people who have played a significant role in your experiences .

5. Dialogue and description: Dialogue and description are important tools for bringing your personal essay to life. They can help to create a sense of immediacy and intimacy, and can help to convey the emotions and experiences you are describing.

6. Reflection and analysis: Your personal essay should include reflection and analysis on the events and experiences you describe. This can help to provide insight into your thought processes and personal growth.

7. Conclusion and takeaway: Your personal essay should include a conclusion that provides closure and a sense of resolution.It should also leave the reader with a takeaway or lesson that they can apply to their own lives .

Choosing a Topic

Choosing a topic for your personal essay can be challenging, but it’s important to select a topic that is meaningful and relevant to your life experiences. Here are six categories of topics to consider:

1. Personal experiences: Write about a significant event or experience in your life, such as a difficult decision you had to make, a moment of triumph or failure, or a life-changing experience.

2. Relationships and family : Explore the dynamics of your relationships with family members, friends, or romantic partners. Write about the challenges, joys, and lessons you have learned from these relationships.

3. Identity and self-discovery: Reflect on your personal identity and the experiences that have shaped your sense of self . Consider how your background, culture, or beliefs have influenced your worldview.

4. Travel and culture: Write about your experiences traveling to different parts of the world, and how these experiences have broadened your perspective and challenged your assumptions.

5. Challenges and obstacles: Write about a difficult challenge or obstacle you have faced , and how you overcame it. Consider the lessons you learned and how this experience has shaped you.

6. Hobbies and interests: Write about a hobby or interest that is important to you, and how it has influenced your life and worldview.

You can write an interesting and powerful personal essay if you choose a topic that is important to you and relates to your life. When writing your piece, keep in mind the parts of a personal essay and take the time to think about your experiences, feelings, and personal growth. With these tools, you can write a personal essay that will connect with readers and show them your unique thoughts and experiences.

Personal Essay Examples

Reading personal essay examples can be a helpful way to understand the elements of a strong personal essay. Here are 10 inspiring personal essay examples:

1. “The Fourth State of Matter” by Jo Ann Beard

2. “On Keeping a Notebook” by Joan Didion

3. “Me Talk Pretty One Day” by David Sedaris

4. “The Year of Magical Thinking” by Joan Didion

5. “Notes of a Native Son” by James Baldwin

6. The Death of My Father” by Steve Martin

7. “The White Album” by Joan Didion

8. “Consider the Lobster” by David Foster Wallace

9. “The Empathy Exams” by Leslie Jamison

10. The Glass Essay” by Anne Carson

Each of these personal essays is characterized by its unique voice, vivid storytelling, and thoughtful reflection. Reading these examples can help you develop an understanding of the different ways that personal essays can be structured and the types of topics that can be explored.

Personal Essay Topics

Choosing a topic for your personal essay can be challenging, but there are many different areas of your life that you can explore. Here are 15 personal essay topics to consider:

1. A meaningful experience that changed your life

2. A challenge you overcame

3. A relationship that impacted your life

4. Your cultural identity

5. A place that is special to you

6.A hobby or interest that defines you

7. A pivotal moment in your life

8. A difficult decision you had to make

9. An obstacle you faced and how you overcame it

10. Your personal beliefs and values

11. The importance of family in your life

12. Your greatest achievement

13. A time you failed and what you learned from it

14. A lesson you learned from someone you admire

15. A childhood memory that has stayed with you

These personal essay topics can be adapted and expanded to fit your own experiences and interests. Remember to choose a topic that is meaningful to you and that you can explore in depth through storytelling and reflection. With the right topic and approach, you can write a personal essay that is both engaging and impactful.

Personal Essay Structure

A clear structure is essential to a well-written personal essay. Without a clear structure, your essay may feel disjointed and lack coherence. Here are some tips for structuring your personal essay effectively:

1. Start with an engaging introduction that captures the reader’s attention and sets the tone for the rest of the essay .

2. Develop a clear narrative arc that guides the reader through the events and experiences you describe. This should include a beginning, middle, and end, with a clear progression of events that build toward a climax and resolution.

3. Use descriptive language and sensory details to bring your experiences and characters to life. This can help to create a sense of immediacy and intimacy, and can help to convey the emotions and experiences you are describing.

4. Include reflection and analysis on the events and experiences you describe. This can help to provide insight into your thought processes and personal growth.

5. End with a conclusion that provides closure and a sense of resolution. It should also leave the reader with a takeaway or lesson that they can apply to their own lives.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. what is the difference between a personal essay and a memoir.

A personal essay is a short, non-fiction piece that focuses on a single event or experience. A memoir, on the other hand, is a longer work that typically covers a larger period of time and may include multiple events and experiences .

2. Can I use humor in a personal essay?

Yes,humor can be a powerful tool in a personal essay. However, it’s important to use humor in a way that is appropriate to the tone and content of your essay .

3. Should I use first person in a personal essay?

Yes, it is generally appropriate to use first person in a personal essay. This allows you to speak from your own perspective and to share your personal experiences and insights with the reader.

4. How do I make my personal essay stand out?

To make your personal essay stand out, focus on developing a unique voice and perspective. Be honest, authentic, and vulnerable in your writing, and try to convey your experiences and emotions in a way that is both relatable and insightful.

5. How long should a personal essay be?

The length of a personal essay can vary depending on the assignment requirements. However, a typical personal essay is usually around 500-800 words.

In conclusion , personal essays are an important type of creative nonfiction that let writers share their own experiences and insights with others. You can write a powerful and memorable personal essay by making sure it has a clear structure, an interesting story, and thoughtful reflection.

Remember to choose a topic that is important to you and to use descriptive language and sensory details to bring your experiences to life. With the right approach and frame of mind, you can write a personal essay that makes readers feel something and gives them a unique and personal view of the world.

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How to Write a Personal Essay: Best Tips and Easy Guide

How to Write a Personal Essay: Overview

If you're a student or someone who writes professionally, chances are you've encountered the task of composing a personal essay. Personal essays stand apart from other types of academic writing because they provide an opportunity for writers to unveil their unique personalities, recount their personal experiences, and express their deepest emotions. Crafting such college essays can pose challenges, yet it can also yield profound rewards by fostering self-discovery and forging connections with readers. In this article, we will guide you on how to write a personal essay step by step.

Defining What is a Personal Essay

Also referred to as a personal statement, a personal essay allows the writer to express their thoughts and experiences on a particular topic. It is a form of creative nonfiction writing that reveals the writer's personality, beliefs, values, and emotions. They are often used in college applications to give the admissions officers a glimpse into the applicant's life experiences and personality. They can also be used as a tool for self-reflection and personal growth.

One of the unique aspects of a personal essay is that it is written in the first person. This allows the writer to connect with the reader on a personal level and create a sense of intimacy. The writer can use their own voice and style to convey their message, making the essay more engaging and relatable.

Personal essays can take many different forms, such as a memoir, personal narrative essay, or personal reflection. They can be humorous, serious, or a combination of both. No matter if you want to learn how to write a personal narrative essay for high school or upper education, the key is to be authentic and honest in your writing, as this will make the essay more compelling.

When writing personal essays, it is important to have a clear focus and purpose. What message do you want to convey to your reader? What do you want them to take away from your essay? By answering these questions, you can create a great college essay with a lasting impact on readers.

Importance and Benefits of Personal Essay Writing

Personal essay writing is a powerful tool that can provide several benefits to the writer. The process of writing about your personal story and emotions can lead to growth and self-awareness. Here are some of the key benefits of personal essay writing:

Understanding Your Experiences and Emotions

Personal essay writing allows you to reflect on your experiences and emotions in a meaningful way. By putting your thoughts and feelings down on paper, you can gain a deeper understanding of yourself and your life experiences. This can help you to process difficult emotions, work through challenging situations, and gain a new perspective on your life.

Improving Your Writing Skills

Personal essay writing is also an excellent way to improve your writing skills. As you write more personal essays, you will develop your own unique style and voice. You will learn how to structure your writing, use language effectively, and connect with your audience. These skills will not only help you in your personal writing, but they will also be valuable in your professional life.

Finding Emotional Release

Personal essay writing can also be therapeutic. By writing about your experiences and emotions, you can release pent-up feelings and find a sense of closure. This can be especially helpful if you have experienced trauma or difficult life events. Writing can provide a safe and private space to process your emotions and work through challenging situations.

Connecting with Your Audience

Finally, personal essay writing can help you connect with your audience. By sharing your personal experiences and emotions, you can build a relationship with your readers based on shared experiences and emotions. This can be a powerful way to connect with others, build empathy, and create a sense of community.

How to Write a Personal Essay: 9 Things to Consider

Personal essays are a great way to share your experiences, thoughts, and beliefs with others. They allow you to connect with your readers on a personal level and convey a message that is unique to you. Here are 9 main things from our personal essay writer to consider while writing.

Choose a Topic

The first step in writing a personal essay is to choose the best one out of several personal essay topics that you are most passionate about. It should be a topic that reflects your experiences and resonates with your readers. Consider significant life events, childhood memories, personal beliefs, or observations that you have made. Choose a topic that you can write about in detail, and that will keep your readers engaged.

Make an Outline for Personal Essay

When curious about how to start a personal essay, create an outline for personal essay first. This will help you organize your thoughts and ideas in a logical sequence. Your outline should include an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.

• In the introduction, you should hook the reader with an engaging opening sentence, provide background information, and a thesis statement.
• In the body paragraphs, you should provide details about your personal experiences and reflect on them.
• Lastly, in conclusion, you should summarize your key points and leave a lasting impression on the reader.

Develop a Compelling Introduction

The introductory paragraph is the most crucial part of your personal essay. It is where you hook the reader's attention and provide context for your essay. A compelling introduction should be concise, engaging, and relevant to your topic.

• Start with a startling fact, a rhetorical question, or a personal anecdote to grab the reader's attention.
• Then, provide background information to inform the reader about your topic.
• Finally, end your introduction with a thesis statement that encapsulates the central theme of your entire essay.

Share Personal Experiences

The body paragraphs of your essay should be dedicated to sharing your personal experiences and reflecting on them. Use vivid details and sensory descriptions to paint a picture for your reader. Be honest and authentic in your writing, and do not be afraid to reveal your emotions. Use literary devices such as metaphors, similes, and personification to make your writing more engaging. The body paragraphs should be well organized, with each paragraph focusing on a particular aspect of your personal experience.

Structure the Body Paragraphs

The body paragraphs of your personal essay should be structured with a clear topic sentence, supporting details, and a concluding sentence. Each paragraph should be connected to the central thesis statement and flow smoothly into the next paragraph. Use transitions to connect one paragraph to the other, and make your essay easy to read.

Reflect and Analyze

Personal essays require reflection and analysis. After sharing your personal experiences, analyze them and reflect on what you have learned. Think about how your experiences have impacted your life and your outlook on the world. Analyze the lessons you have learned and how they relate to your thesis statement. This reflection and analysis will give your essay depth and help your readers connect with you on a personal level.

Maintain Authenticity and Honesty

When wondering about how to write a good personal essay, remember that it requires honesty and authenticity. Do not try to hide your flaws or weaknesses, but rather, embrace them. Be honest about your experiences and emotions, even if they are uncomfortable. Your honesty will resonate with your readers and make your essay more relatable. Also, avoid using a fake voice or imitating other writers, as it will come across as insincere. Your personal essay should be a reflection of who you are and what you believe.

Write a Memorable Conclusion

When it comes to writing a memorable conclusion for a personal essay, there are several tips that can elevate your piece and leave a lasting impact on readers.

• Revisit the central theme or message of your essay
• Summarize the key points and experiences you have shared
• Incorporate a personal reflection or anecdote to create an emotional connection
• End with a thought-provoking question or a call to action
• Provide a sense of closure by showcasing personal growth or resolution
• Customize the conclusion to align with the overall tone and style of your essay

Edit and Revise

Editing and revising your final personal essay is a vital step in the writing process that ensures your piece is polished, cohesive, and impactful.

• Start by reviewing the overall format of personal essay, checking for a logical flow of ideas and a well-developed introduction and conclusion.
• Consider the clarity and effectiveness of your language, eliminating any unnecessary or repetitive phrases.
• Pay close attention to grammar, spelling, and punctuation errors, as they can distract readers from your message.
• As you read through your essay, assess the strength of your arguments, examples, and supporting evidence, making revisions where needed to strengthen your overall argument.
• Take time to refine your choice of words and sentence structure, aiming for clarity and precision.
• Finally, seek feedback from trusted individuals, such as teachers or peers, who can provide valuable insights and suggestions for improvement.

4 Extra Tips on How to Write a Good Personal Essay

While we've already provided you with a step-by-step guide on writing a personal essay for college, we believe that a few extra tips can take your writing from good to exceptional. So, explore some extra tips and tricks on how to write a personal narrative essay that will help you unleash the full potential of your storytelling abilities.

• Embrace vulnerability : Personal statements have the power to resonate deeply with readers when they offer genuine vulnerability. Don't be afraid to share your fears, struggles, or insecurities. By revealing your authentic self, you create a connection with readers and invite them to empathize with your experiences.
• Utilize vivid sensory details : To bring your personal essay to life, incorporate vivid sensory details. Engage your readers' senses by describing the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and textures of the moments you're recounting. This not only adds depth and richness to your writing but also helps readers immerse themselves in your narrative.
• Experiment with structure : Personal essays don't necessarily have to follow a traditional linear structure. Feel free to experiment with different structures, such as flashbacks, circular narratives, or non-chronological storytelling. Playing with structure can add intrigue and make your essay stand out, allowing you to present your experiences in a unique and captivating way.
• Reflect on broader implications : While many personal essays are centered around your experiences, it's valuable to reflect on the broader implications and universal lessons they offer. Consider the insights and lessons you've gained from your personal journey and explore how they connect to larger themes or issues. By making these connections, you can create a personal essay that resonates on a deeper level and offers thought-provoking insights to your readers.

Personal Essay Examples

Personal essay examples have a special power to grab readers' attention and take them into the personal world of the writer. In order to best learn how to write a personal essay for college, we will look at a practical example that highlights the genuine honesty, deep thinking, and inner strength that make this type of writing so remarkable.

Unveiling My Silent Strength

In a world filled with noise, finding my voice was a journey of self-discovery and courage. Growing up, I was always the quiet one, preferring to blend into the background rather than stand out. It wasn't that I lacked opinions or thoughts; rather, I lacked the confidence to express them. But as I embarked on the path of self-reflection, I realized that my silence was hindering my personal growth.

It was during my freshman year of college that I decided to challenge myself. I joined a public speaking club, where I was exposed to a supportive community of individuals eager to improve their communication skills. Week after week, I stood before the group, trembling at first but gradually finding my footing. I learned the power of eye contact, gestures and the importance of vocal projection. The more I practiced, the more my confidence grew.

Beyond the club, I sought opportunities to raise my voice in other areas of my life. I engaged in class discussions, voicing my perspectives and challenging ideas. I started writing articles for the college newspaper, sharing my thoughts on various topics. With each step, I discovered that my voice carried weight and that my words mattered.

Finding my voice extended beyond the realm of public speaking. It became a metaphor for asserting my identity and speaking up for what I believed in. I realized that my silence had held me back from connecting with others and making a difference in the world. Through finding my voice, I found empowerment and the courage to advocate for causes that mattered to me.

Now, as I reflect on my journey, I am proud of the person I have become. While I still appreciate moments of solitude, I no longer fear raising my voice. I embrace the power of my words and the impact they can have. Finding my voice has not only transformed my self-perception but has also allowed me to forge deeper connections, inspire change, and navigate the world with a newfound sense of purpose.

In this guide, we have explored what is a personal essay along with the art of writing compelling personal narrative essay examples, uncovering valuable tips to guide you along the way. From selecting a meaningful topic to crafting an engaging piece, you have learned the importance of weaving personal experiences and emotions into our narratives.

In the meantime, you can always use our expert writing help whether you need assistance with brainstorming ideas for a personal essay, structuring your work, refining your writing style, or creating an entire paper from scratch!

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• How to write a rhetorical analysis | Key concepts & examples

How to Write a Rhetorical Analysis | Key Concepts & Examples

Published on August 28, 2020 by Jack Caulfield . Revised on July 23, 2023.

A rhetorical analysis is a type of essay  that looks at a text in terms of rhetoric. This means it is less concerned with what the author is saying than with how they say it: their goals, techniques, and appeals to the audience.

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Table of contents

Key concepts in rhetoric, analyzing the text, introducing your rhetorical analysis, the body: doing the analysis, concluding a rhetorical analysis, other interesting articles, frequently asked questions about rhetorical analysis.

Rhetoric, the art of effective speaking and writing, is a subject that trains you to look at texts, arguments and speeches in terms of how they are designed to persuade the audience. This section introduces a few of the key concepts of this field.

Appeals: Logos, ethos, pathos

Appeals are how the author convinces their audience. Three central appeals are discussed in rhetoric, established by the philosopher Aristotle and sometimes called the rhetorical triangle: logos, ethos, and pathos.

Logos , or the logical appeal, refers to the use of reasoned argument to persuade. This is the dominant approach in academic writing , where arguments are built up using reasoning and evidence.

Ethos , or the ethical appeal, involves the author presenting themselves as an authority on their subject. For example, someone making a moral argument might highlight their own morally admirable behavior; someone speaking about a technical subject might present themselves as an expert by mentioning their qualifications.

Pathos , or the pathetic appeal, evokes the audience’s emotions. This might involve speaking in a passionate way, employing vivid imagery, or trying to provoke anger, sympathy, or any other emotional response in the audience.

These three appeals are all treated as integral parts of rhetoric, and a given author may combine all three of them to convince their audience.

Text and context

In rhetoric, a text is not necessarily a piece of writing (though it may be this). A text is whatever piece of communication you are analyzing. This could be, for example, a speech, an advertisement, or a satirical image.

In these cases, your analysis would focus on more than just language—you might look at visual or sonic elements of the text too.

The context is everything surrounding the text: Who is the author (or speaker, designer, etc.)? Who is their (intended or actual) audience? When and where was the text produced, and for what purpose?

Looking at the context can help to inform your rhetorical analysis. For example, Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech has universal power, but the context of the civil rights movement is an important part of understanding why.

Claims, supports, and warrants

A piece of rhetoric is always making some sort of argument, whether it’s a very clearly defined and logical one (e.g. in a philosophy essay) or one that the reader has to infer (e.g. in a satirical article). These arguments are built up with claims, supports, and warrants.

A claim is the fact or idea the author wants to convince the reader of. An argument might center on a single claim, or be built up out of many. Claims are usually explicitly stated, but they may also just be implied in some kinds of text.

The author uses supports to back up each claim they make. These might range from hard evidence to emotional appeals—anything that is used to convince the reader to accept a claim.

The warrant is the logic or assumption that connects a support with a claim. Outside of quite formal argumentation, the warrant is often unstated—the author assumes their audience will understand the connection without it. But that doesn’t mean you can’t still explore the implicit warrant in these cases.

For example, look at the following statement:

We can see a claim and a support here, but the warrant is implicit. Here, the warrant is the assumption that more likeable candidates would have inspired greater turnout. We might be more or less convinced by the argument depending on whether we think this is a fair assumption.

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Rhetorical analysis isn’t a matter of choosing concepts in advance and applying them to a text. Instead, it starts with looking at the text in detail and asking the appropriate questions about how it works:

• What is the author’s purpose?
• Do they focus closely on their key claims, or do they discuss various topics?
• What tone do they take—angry or sympathetic? Personal or authoritative? Formal or informal?
• Who seems to be the intended audience? Is this audience likely to be successfully reached and convinced?
• What kinds of evidence are presented?

By asking these questions, you’ll discover the various rhetorical devices the text uses. Don’t feel that you have to cram in every rhetorical term you know—focus on those that are most important to the text.

The following sections show how to write the different parts of a rhetorical analysis.

Like all essays, a rhetorical analysis begins with an introduction . The introduction tells readers what text you’ll be discussing, provides relevant background information, and presents your thesis statement .

Hover over different parts of the example below to see how an introduction works.

Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have a Dream” speech is widely regarded as one of the most important pieces of oratory in American history. Delivered in 1963 to thousands of civil rights activists outside the Lincoln Memorial in Washington, D.C., the speech has come to symbolize the spirit of the civil rights movement and even to function as a major part of the American national myth. This rhetorical analysis argues that King’s assumption of the prophetic voice, amplified by the historic size of his audience, creates a powerful sense of ethos that has retained its inspirational power over the years.

The body of your rhetorical analysis is where you’ll tackle the text directly. It’s often divided into three paragraphs, although it may be more in a longer essay.

Each paragraph should focus on a different element of the text, and they should all contribute to your overall argument for your thesis statement.

Hover over the example to explore how a typical body paragraph is constructed.

King’s speech is infused with prophetic language throughout. Even before the famous “dream” part of the speech, King’s language consistently strikes a prophetic tone. He refers to the Lincoln Memorial as a “hallowed spot” and speaks of rising “from the dark and desolate valley of segregation” to “make justice a reality for all of God’s children.” The assumption of this prophetic voice constitutes the text’s strongest ethical appeal; after linking himself with political figures like Lincoln and the Founding Fathers, King’s ethos adopts a distinctly religious tone, recalling Biblical prophets and preachers of change from across history. This adds significant force to his words; standing before an audience of hundreds of thousands, he states not just what the future should be, but what it will be: “The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.” This warning is almost apocalyptic in tone, though it concludes with the positive image of the “bright day of justice.” The power of King’s rhetoric thus stems not only from the pathos of his vision of a brighter future, but from the ethos of the prophetic voice he adopts in expressing this vision.

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The conclusion of a rhetorical analysis wraps up the essay by restating the main argument and showing how it has been developed by your analysis. It may also try to link the text, and your analysis of it, with broader concerns.

Explore the example below to get a sense of the conclusion.

It is clear from this analysis that the effectiveness of King’s rhetoric stems less from the pathetic appeal of his utopian “dream” than it does from the ethos he carefully constructs to give force to his statements. By framing contemporary upheavals as part of a prophecy whose fulfillment will result in the better future he imagines, King ensures not only the effectiveness of his words in the moment but their continuing resonance today. Even if we have not yet achieved King’s dream, we cannot deny the role his words played in setting us on the path toward it.

If you want to know more about AI tools , college essays , or fallacies make sure to check out some of our other articles with explanations and examples or go directly to our tools!

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The goal of a rhetorical analysis is to explain the effect a piece of writing or oratory has on its audience, how successful it is, and the devices and appeals it uses to achieve its goals.

Unlike a standard argumentative essay , it’s less about taking a position on the arguments presented, and more about exploring how they are constructed.

The term “text” in a rhetorical analysis essay refers to whatever object you’re analyzing. It’s frequently a piece of writing or a speech, but it doesn’t have to be. For example, you could also treat an advertisement or political cartoon as a text.

Logos appeals to the audience’s reason, building up logical arguments . Ethos appeals to the speaker’s status or authority, making the audience more likely to trust them. Pathos appeals to the emotions, trying to make the audience feel angry or sympathetic, for example.

Collectively, these three appeals are sometimes called the rhetorical triangle . They are central to rhetorical analysis , though a piece of rhetoric might not necessarily use all of them.

In rhetorical analysis , a claim is something the author wants the audience to believe. A support is the evidence or appeal they use to convince the reader to believe the claim. A warrant is the (often implicit) assumption that links the support with the claim.

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College Admissions , College Essays

The personal statement might just be the hardest part of your college application. Mostly this is because it has the least guidance and is the most open-ended. One way to understand what colleges are looking for when they ask you to write an essay is to check out the essays of students who already got in—college essays that actually worked. After all, they must be among the most successful of this weird literary genre.

In this article, I'll go through general guidelines for what makes great college essays great. I've also compiled an enormous list of 100+ actual sample college essays from 11 different schools. Finally, I'll break down two of these published college essay examples and explain why and how they work. With links to 177 full essays and essay excerpts , this article is a great resource for learning how to craft your own personal college admissions essay!

What Excellent College Essays Have in Common

Even though in many ways these sample college essays are very different from one other, they do share some traits you should try to emulate as you write your own essay.

Visible Signs of Planning

Building out from a narrow, concrete focus. You'll see a similar structure in many of the essays. The author starts with a very detailed story of an event or description of a person or place. After this sense-heavy imagery, the essay expands out to make a broader point about the author, and connects this very memorable experience to the author's present situation, state of mind, newfound understanding, or maturity level.

Knowing how to tell a story. Some of the experiences in these essays are one-of-a-kind. But most deal with the stuff of everyday life. What sets them apart is the way the author approaches the topic: analyzing it for drama and humor, for its moving qualities, for what it says about the author's world, and for how it connects to the author's emotional life.

Stellar Execution

A killer first sentence. You've heard it before, and you'll hear it again: you have to suck the reader in, and the best place to do that is the first sentence. Great first sentences are punchy. They are like cliffhangers, setting up an exciting scene or an unusual situation with an unclear conclusion, in order to make the reader want to know more. Don't take my word for it—check out these 22 first sentences from Stanford applicants and tell me you don't want to read the rest of those essays to find out what happens!

A lively, individual voice. Writing is for readers. In this case, your reader is an admissions officer who has read thousands of essays before yours and will read thousands after. Your goal? Don't bore your reader. Use interesting descriptions, stay away from clichés, include your own offbeat observations—anything that makes this essay sounds like you and not like anyone else.

Technical correctness. No spelling mistakes, no grammar weirdness, no syntax issues, no punctuation snafus—each of these sample college essays has been formatted and proofread perfectly. If this kind of exactness is not your strong suit, you're in luck! All colleges advise applicants to have their essays looked over several times by parents, teachers, mentors, and anyone else who can spot a comma splice. Your essay must be your own work, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with getting help polishing it.

And if you need more guidance, connect with PrepScholar's expert admissions consultants . These expert writers know exactly what college admissions committees look for in an admissions essay and chan help you craft an essay that boosts your chances of getting into your dream school.

Check out PrepScholar's Essay Editing and Coaching progra m for more details!

Links to Full College Essay Examples

Some colleges publish a selection of their favorite accepted college essays that worked, and I've put together a selection of over 100 of these.

Common App Essay Samples

Please note that some of these college essay examples may be responding to prompts that are no longer in use. The current Common App prompts are as follows:

1. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story. 2. The lessons we take from obstacles we encounter can be fundamental to later success. Recount a time when you faced a challenge, setback, or failure. How did it affect you, and what did you learn from the experience? 3. Reflect on a time when you questioned or challenged a belief or idea. What prompted your thinking? What was the outcome? 4. Reflect on something that someone has done for you that has made you happy or thankful in a surprising way. How has this gratitude affected or motivated you? 5. Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others. 6. Describe a topic, idea, or concept you find so engaging that it makes you lose all track of time. Why does it captivate you? What or who do you turn to when you want to learn more?

7. Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

Now, let's get to the good stuff: the list of 177 college essay examples responding to current and past Common App essay prompts. 

Connecticut college.

• 12 Common Application essays from the classes of 2022-2025

Hamilton College

• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2026
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2022
• 7 Common Application essays from the class of 2018
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2012
• 8 Common Application essays from the class of 2007

Johns Hopkins

These essays are answers to past prompts from either the Common Application or the Coalition Application (which Johns Hopkins used to accept).

• 1 Common Application or Coalition Application essay from the class of 2026
• 6 Common Application or Coalition Application essays from the class of 2025
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2024
• 6 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2023
• 7 Common Application of Universal Application essays from the class of 2022
• 5 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2021
• 7 Common Application or Universal Application essays from the class of 2020

Essay Examples Published by Other Websites

• 2 Common Application essays ( 1st essay , 2nd essay ) from applicants admitted to Columbia

Other Sample College Essays

Here is a collection of essays that are college-specific.

Babson College

• 4 essays (and 1 video response) on "Why Babson" from the class of 2020

Emory University

• 5 essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) from the class of 2020 along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on why the essays were exceptional
• 5 more recent essay examples ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 , 5 ) along with analysis from Emory admissions staff on what made these essays stand out

University of Georgia

• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2019
• 1 “strong essay” sample from 2018
• 10 Harvard essays from 2023
• 10 Harvard essays from 2022
• 10 Harvard essays from 2021
• 10 Harvard essays from 2020
• 10 Harvard essays from 2019
• 10 Harvard essays from 2018
• 6 essays from admitted MIT students

Smith College

• 6 "best gift" essays from the class of 2018

Books of College Essays

If you're looking for even more sample college essays, consider purchasing a college essay book. The best of these include dozens of essays that worked and feedback from real admissions officers.

College Essays That Made a Difference —This detailed guide from Princeton Review includes not only successful essays, but also interviews with admissions officers and full student profiles.

50 Successful Harvard Application Essays by the Staff of the Harvard Crimson—A must for anyone aspiring to Harvard .

50 Successful Ivy League Application Essays and 50 Successful Stanford Application Essays by Gen and Kelly Tanabe—For essays from other top schools, check out this venerated series, which is regularly updated with new essays.

Heavenly Essays by Janine W. Robinson—This collection from the popular blogger behind Essay Hell includes a wider range of schools, as well as helpful tips on honing your own essay.

Analyzing Great Common App Essays That Worked

I've picked two essays from the examples collected above to examine in more depth so that you can see exactly what makes a successful college essay work. Full credit for these essays goes to the original authors and the schools that published them.

Example 1: "Breaking Into Cars," by Stephen, Johns Hopkins Class of '19 (Common App Essay, 636 words long)

I had never broken into a car before.

We were in Laredo, having just finished our first day at a Habitat for Humanity work site. The Hotchkiss volunteers had already left, off to enjoy some Texas BBQ, leaving me behind with the college kids to clean up. Not until we were stranded did we realize we were locked out of the van.

Someone picked a coat hanger out of the dumpster, handed it to me, and took a few steps back.

"Can you do that thing with a coat hanger to unlock it?"

"Why me?" I thought.

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame. Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally. My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed. "The water's on fire! Clear a hole!" he shouted, tossing me in the lake without warning. While I'm still unconvinced about that particular lesson's practicality, my Dad's overarching message is unequivocally true: much of life is unexpected, and you have to deal with the twists and turns.

Living in my family, days rarely unfolded as planned. A bit overlooked, a little pushed around, I learned to roll with reality, negotiate a quick deal, and give the improbable a try. I don't sweat the small stuff, and I definitely don't expect perfect fairness. So what if our dining room table only has six chairs for seven people? Someone learns the importance of punctuality every night.

But more than punctuality and a special affinity for musical chairs, my family life has taught me to thrive in situations over which I have no power. Growing up, I never controlled my older siblings, but I learned how to thwart their attempts to control me. I forged alliances, and realigned them as necessary. Sometimes, I was the poor, defenseless little brother; sometimes I was the omniscient elder. Different things to different people, as the situation demanded. I learned to adapt.

Back then, these techniques were merely reactions undertaken to ensure my survival. But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The question caught me off guard, much like the question posed to me in Laredo. Then, I realized I knew the answer. I knew why the coat hanger had been handed to me.

Growing up as the middle child in my family, I was a vital participant in a thing I did not govern, in the company of people I did not choose. It's family. It's society. And often, it's chaos. You participate by letting go of the small stuff, not expecting order and perfection, and facing the unexpected with confidence, optimism, and preparedness. My family experience taught me to face a serendipitous world with confidence.

What Makes This Essay Tick?

It's very helpful to take writing apart in order to see just how it accomplishes its objectives. Stephen's essay is very effective. Let's find out why!

An Opening Line That Draws You In

In just eight words, we get: scene-setting (he is standing next to a car about to break in), the idea of crossing a boundary (he is maybe about to do an illegal thing for the first time), and a cliffhanger (we are thinking: is he going to get caught? Is he headed for a life of crime? Is he about to be scared straight?).

Great, Detailed Opening Story

More out of amusement than optimism, I gave it a try. I slid the hanger into the window's seal like I'd seen on crime shows, and spent a few minutes jiggling the apparatus around the inside of the frame.

It's the details that really make this small experience come alive. Notice how whenever he can, Stephen uses a more specific, descriptive word in place of a more generic one. The volunteers aren't going to get food or dinner; they're going for "Texas BBQ." The coat hanger comes from "a dumpster." Stephen doesn't just move the coat hanger—he "jiggles" it.

Details also help us visualize the emotions of the people in the scene. The person who hands Stephen the coat hanger isn't just uncomfortable or nervous; he "takes a few steps back"—a description of movement that conveys feelings. Finally, the detail of actual speech makes the scene pop. Instead of writing that the other guy asked him to unlock the van, Stephen has the guy actually say his own words in a way that sounds like a teenager talking.

Turning a Specific Incident Into a Deeper Insight

Suddenly, two things simultaneously clicked. One was the lock on the door. (I actually succeeded in springing it.) The other was the realization that I'd been in this type of situation before. In fact, I'd been born into this type of situation.

Stephen makes the locked car experience a meaningful illustration of how he has learned to be resourceful and ready for anything, and he also makes this turn from the specific to the broad through an elegant play on the two meanings of the word "click."

Using Concrete Examples When Making Abstract Claims

My upbringing has numbed me to unpredictability and chaos. With a family of seven, my home was loud, messy, and spottily supervised. My siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing—all meant my house was functioning normally.

"Unpredictability and chaos" are very abstract, not easily visualized concepts. They could also mean any number of things—violence, abandonment, poverty, mental instability. By instantly following up with highly finite and unambiguous illustrations like "family of seven" and "siblings arguing, the dog barking, the phone ringing," Stephen grounds the abstraction in something that is easy to picture: a large, noisy family.

Using Small Bits of Humor and Casual Word Choice

My Dad, a retired Navy pilot, was away half the time. When he was home, he had a parenting style something like a drill sergeant. At the age of nine, I learned how to clear burning oil from the surface of water. My Dad considered this a critical life skill—you know, in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed.

Obviously, knowing how to clean burning oil is not high on the list of things every 9-year-old needs to know. To emphasize this, Stephen uses sarcasm by bringing up a situation that is clearly over-the-top: "in case my aircraft carrier should ever get torpedoed."

The humor also feels relaxed. Part of this is because he introduces it with the colloquial phrase "you know," so it sounds like he is talking to us in person. This approach also diffuses the potential discomfort of the reader with his father's strictness—since he is making jokes about it, clearly he is OK. Notice, though, that this doesn't occur very much in the essay. This helps keep the tone meaningful and serious rather than flippant.

An Ending That Stretches the Insight Into the Future

But one day this fall, Dr. Hicks, our Head of School, asked me a question that he hoped all seniors would reflect on throughout the year: "How can I participate in a thing I do not govern, in the company of people I did not choose?"

The ending of the essay reveals that Stephen's life has been one long preparation for the future. He has emerged from chaos and his dad's approach to parenting as a person who can thrive in a world that he can't control.

This connection of past experience to current maturity and self-knowledge is a key element in all successful personal essays. Colleges are very much looking for mature, self-aware applicants. These are the qualities of successful college students, who will be able to navigate the independence college classes require and the responsibility and quasi-adulthood of college life.

What Could This Essay Do Even Better?

Even the best essays aren't perfect, and even the world's greatest writers will tell you that writing is never "finished"—just "due." So what would we tweak in this essay if we could?

Replace some of the clichéd language. Stephen uses handy phrases like "twists and turns" and "don't sweat the small stuff" as a kind of shorthand for explaining his relationship to chaos and unpredictability. But using too many of these ready-made expressions runs the risk of clouding out your own voice and replacing it with something expected and boring.

Use another example from recent life. Stephen's first example (breaking into the van in Laredo) is a great illustration of being resourceful in an unexpected situation. But his essay also emphasizes that he "learned to adapt" by being "different things to different people." It would be great to see how this plays out outside his family, either in the situation in Laredo or another context.

Example 2: By Renner Kwittken, Tufts Class of '23 (Common App Essay, 645 words long)

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver. I saw it in my favorite book, Richard Scarry's "Cars and Trucks and Things That Go," and for some reason, I was absolutely obsessed with the idea of driving a giant pickle. Much to the discontent of my younger sister, I insisted that my parents read us that book as many nights as possible so we could find goldbug, a small little golden bug, on every page. I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Then I discovered a real goldbug: gold nanoparticles that can reprogram macrophages to assist in killing tumors, produce clear images of them without sacrificing the subject, and heat them to obliteration.

Suddenly the destination of my pickle was clear.

I quickly became enveloped by the world of nanomedicine; I scoured articles about liposomes, polymeric micelles, dendrimers, targeting ligands, and self-assembling nanoparticles, all conquering cancer in some exotic way. Completely absorbed, I set out to find a mentor to dive even deeper into these topics. After several rejections, I was immensely grateful to receive an invitation to work alongside Dr. Sangeeta Ray at Johns Hopkins.

In the lab, Dr. Ray encouraged a great amount of autonomy to design and implement my own procedures. I chose to attack a problem that affects the entire field of nanomedicine: nanoparticles consistently fail to translate from animal studies into clinical trials. Jumping off recent literature, I set out to see if a pre-dose of a common chemotherapeutic could enhance nanoparticle delivery in aggressive prostate cancer, creating three novel constructs based on three different linear polymers, each using fluorescent dye (although no gold, sorry goldbug!). Though using radioactive isotopes like Gallium and Yttrium would have been incredible, as a 17-year-old, I unfortunately wasn't allowed in the same room as these radioactive materials (even though I took a Geiger counter to a pair of shoes and found them to be slightly dangerous).

I hadn't expected my hypothesis to work, as the research project would have ideally been led across two full years. Yet while there are still many optimizations and revisions to be done, I was thrilled to find -- with completely new nanoparticles that may one day mean future trials will use particles with the initials "RK-1" -- thatcyclophosphamide did indeed increase nanoparticle delivery to the tumor in a statistically significant way.

A secondary, unexpected research project was living alone in Baltimore, a new city to me, surrounded by people much older than I. Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research. Whether in a presentation or in a casual conversation, making others interested in science is perhaps more exciting to me than the research itself. This solidified a new pursuit to angle my love for writing towards illuminating science in ways people can understand, adding value to a society that can certainly benefit from more scientific literacy.

It seems fitting that my goals are still transforming: in Scarry's book, there is not just one goldbug, there is one on every page. With each new experience, I'm learning that it isn't the goldbug itself, but rather the act of searching for the goldbugs that will encourage, shape, and refine my ever-evolving passions. Regardless of the goldbug I seek -- I know my pickle truck has just begun its journey.

Renner takes a somewhat different approach than Stephen, but their essay is just as detailed and engaging. Let's go through some of the strengths of this essay.

One Clear Governing Metaphor

This essay is ultimately about two things: Renner’s dreams and future career goals, and Renner’s philosophy on goal-setting and achieving one’s dreams.

But instead of listing off all the amazing things they’ve done to pursue their dream of working in nanomedicine, Renner tells a powerful, unique story instead. To set up the narrative, Renner opens the essay by connecting their experiences with goal-setting and dream-chasing all the way back to a memorable childhood experience:

This lighthearted–but relevant!--story about the moment when Renner first developed a passion for a specific career (“finding the goldbug”) provides an anchor point for the rest of the essay. As Renner pivots to describing their current dreams and goals–working in nanomedicine–the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” is reflected in Renner’s experiments, rejections, and new discoveries.

Though Renner tells multiple stories about their quest to “find the goldbug,” or, in other words, pursue their passion, each story is connected by a unifying theme; namely, that as we search and grow over time, our goals will transform…and that’s okay! By the end of the essay, Renner uses the metaphor of “finding the goldbug” to reiterate the relevance of the opening story:

While the earlier parts of the essay convey Renner’s core message by showing, the final, concluding paragraph sums up Renner’s insights by telling. By briefly and clearly stating the relevance of the goldbug metaphor to their own philosophy on goals and dreams, Renner demonstrates their creativity, insight, and eagerness to grow and evolve as the journey continues into college.

An Engaging, Individual Voice

This essay uses many techniques that make Renner sound genuine and make the reader feel like we already know them.

Technique #1: humor. Notice Renner's gentle and relaxed humor that lightly mocks their younger self's grand ambitions (this is different from the more sarcastic kind of humor used by Stephen in the first essay—you could never mistake one writer for the other).

My first dream job was to be a pickle truck driver.

I would imagine the wonderful life I would have: being a pig driving a giant pickle truck across the country, chasing and finding goldbug. I then moved on to wanting to be a Lego Master. Then an architect. Then a surgeon.

Renner gives a great example of how to use humor to your advantage in college essays. You don’t want to come off as too self-deprecating or sarcastic, but telling a lightheartedly humorous story about your younger self that also showcases how you’ve grown and changed over time can set the right tone for your entire essay.

Technique #2: intentional, eye-catching structure. The second technique is the way Renner uses a unique structure to bolster the tone and themes of their essay . The structure of your essay can have a major impact on how your ideas come across…so it’s important to give it just as much thought as the content of your essay!

For instance, Renner does a great job of using one-line paragraphs to create dramatic emphasis and to make clear transitions from one phase of the story to the next:

Suddenly the destination of my pickle car was clear.

Not only does the one-liner above signal that Renner is moving into a new phase of the narrative (their nanoparticle research experiences), it also tells the reader that this is a big moment in Renner’s story. It’s clear that Renner made a major discovery that changed the course of their goal pursuit and dream-chasing. Through structure, Renner conveys excitement and entices the reader to keep pushing forward to the next part of the story.

Technique #3: playing with syntax. The third technique is to use sentences of varying length, syntax, and structure. Most of the essay's written in standard English and uses grammatically correct sentences. However, at key moments, Renner emphasizes that the reader needs to sit up and pay attention by switching to short, colloquial, differently punctuated, and sometimes fragmented sentences.

Even with moving frequently between hotels, AirBnB's, and students' apartments, I strangely reveled in the freedom I had to enjoy my surroundings and form new friendships with graduate school students from the lab. We explored The Inner Harbor at night, attended a concert together one weekend, and even got to watch the Orioles lose (to nobody's surprise). Ironically, it's through these new friendships I discovered something unexpected: what I truly love is sharing research.

In the examples above, Renner switches adeptly between long, flowing sentences and quippy, telegraphic ones. At the same time, Renner uses these different sentence lengths intentionally. As they describe their experiences in new places, they use longer sentences to immerse the reader in the sights, smells, and sounds of those experiences. And when it’s time to get a big, key idea across, Renner switches to a short, punchy sentence to stop the reader in their tracks.

The varying syntax and sentence lengths pull the reader into the narrative and set up crucial “aha” moments when it’s most important…which is a surefire way to make any college essay stand out.

Renner's essay is very strong, but there are still a few little things that could be improved.

Connecting the research experiences to the theme of “finding the goldbug.”  The essay begins and ends with Renner’s connection to the idea of “finding the goldbug.” And while this metaphor is deftly tied into the essay’s intro and conclusion, it isn’t entirely clear what Renner’s big findings were during the research experiences that are described in the middle of the essay. It would be great to add a sentence or two stating what Renner’s big takeaways (or “goldbugs”) were from these experiences, which add more cohesion to the essay as a whole.

Give more details about discovering the world of nanomedicine. It makes sense that Renner wants to get into the details of their big research experiences as quickly as possible. After all, these are the details that show Renner’s dedication to nanomedicine! But a smoother transition from the opening pickle car/goldbug story to Renner’s “real goldbug” of nanoparticles would help the reader understand why nanoparticles became Renner’s goldbug. Finding out why Renner is so motivated to study nanomedicine–and perhaps what put them on to this field of study–would help readers fully understand why Renner chose this path in the first place.

4 Essential Tips for Writing Your Own Essay

How can you use this discussion to better your own college essay? Here are some suggestions for ways to use this resource effectively.

#1: Get Help From the Experts

Getting your college applications together takes a lot of work and can be pretty intimidatin g. Essays are even more important than ever now that admissions processes are changing and schools are going test-optional and removing diversity standards thanks to new Supreme Court rulings .  If you want certified expert help that really makes a difference, get started with  PrepScholar’s Essay Editing and Coaching program. Our program can help you put together an incredible essay from idea to completion so that your application stands out from the crowd. We've helped students get into the best colleges in the United States, including Harvard, Stanford, and Yale.  If you're ready to take the next step and boost your odds of getting into your dream school, connect with our experts today .

#2: Read Other Essays to Get Ideas for Your Own

As you go through the essays we've compiled for you above, ask yourself the following questions:

• Can you explain to yourself (or someone else!) why the opening sentence works well?
• Look for the essay's detailed personal anecdote. What senses is the author describing? Can you easily picture the scene in your mind's eye?
• Find the place where this anecdote bridges into a larger insight about the author. How does the essay connect the two? How does the anecdote work as an example of the author's characteristic, trait, or skill?
• Check out the essay's tone. If it's funny, can you find the places where the humor comes from? If it's sad and moving, can you find the imagery and description of feelings that make you moved? If it's serious, can you see how word choice adds to this tone?

Make a note whenever you find an essay or part of an essay that you think was particularly well-written, and think about what you like about it . Is it funny? Does it help you really get to know the writer? Does it show what makes the writer unique? Once you have your list, keep it next to you while writing your essay to remind yourself to try and use those same techniques in your own essay.

#3: Find Your "A-Ha!" Moment

All of these essays rely on connecting with the reader through a heartfelt, highly descriptive scene from the author's life. It can either be very dramatic (did you survive a plane crash?) or it can be completely mundane (did you finally beat your dad at Scrabble?). Either way, it should be personal and revealing about you, your personality, and the way you are now that you are entering the adult world.

Check out essays by authors like John Jeremiah Sullivan , Leslie Jamison , Hanif Abdurraqib , and Esmé Weijun Wang to get more examples of how to craft a compelling personal narrative.

#4: Start Early, Revise Often

Let me level with you: the best writing isn't writing at all. It's rewriting. And in order to have time to rewrite, you have to start way before the application deadline. My advice is to write your first draft at least two months before your applications are due.

Let it sit for a few days untouched. Then come back to it with fresh eyes and think critically about what you've written. What's extra? What's missing? What is in the wrong place? What doesn't make sense? Don't be afraid to take it apart and rearrange sections. Do this several times over, and your essay will be much better for it!

For more editing tips, check out a style guide like Dreyer's English or Eats, Shoots & Leaves .

What's Next?

Still not sure which colleges you want to apply to? Our experts will show you how to make a college list that will help you choose a college that's right for you.

Interested in learning more about college essays? Check out our detailed breakdown of exactly how personal statements work in an application , some suggestions on what to avoid when writing your essay , and our guide to writing about your extracurricular activities .

Working on the rest of your application? Read what admissions officers wish applicants knew before applying .

The recommendations in this post are based solely on our knowledge and experience. If you purchase an item through one of our links PrepScholar may receive a commission.

Anna scored in the 99th percentile on her SATs in high school, and went on to major in English at Princeton and to get her doctorate in English Literature at Columbia. She is passionate about improving student access to higher education.

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Personal Essay

Essay writing  are compositions which basically includes a general idea or an in depth discussion of a particular subjects or topics. They are commonly written as non-fictional pieces which carry the writer’s point of view on a certain topic of his/her choice or interest.

In schools, teachers often assign students how to write an essay  composition about different topics, usually in order to assess their writing skills. There are different essay types, which can be written using the standard structure (introduction, body, and conclusion), and through different writing styles.

What Is a Personal Essay? A personal essay, in the broadest sense, is a written composition which contains information and personal opinions about a specific individual (usually famous and influential individuals). It is one of the most common essays given as an assignment to students of different levels. In some cases, a personal essay (at times known as a  personal statement ) may include the writer’s personal information, as a requirement for an application. They may be used as basis whether to grant an individual’s application or not.

Personal Essay Format

Introduction.

Hook : Begin with a compelling sentence to grab the reader’s attention. This could be an intriguing question, a surprising fact, or a bold statement related to your story. Background Information : Provide some context to your story. This might include the setting, the circumstances leading up to your narrative, or key characters involved. Thesis Statement : Conclude the introduction with a clear thesis statement that presents the main theme or lesson of your essay.

Body Paragraphs

Each paragraph should focus on a single idea that supports your thesis. Use the following structure for each body paragraph:

Topic Sentence : Start with a sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph. Evidence and Examples : Use personal experiences, anecdotes, or reflections to support your point. Be descriptive to help the reader visualize and feel your experiences. Analysis : Explain how these examples support your thesis. Connect your personal story to larger themes or universal truths. Transition : End with a sentence that smoothly transitions to the next paragraph.

Summary : Begin your conclusion by restating your thesis in a new way, summarizing the key points you made in your essay. Reflection : Share what you’ve learned from your experiences. Reflect on the growth or change that occurred as a result. Closing Thought : End with a final thought or call to action that leaves a lasting impression on the reader. This could be a question, a prediction, a hope, or a call to personal reflection.

Example of Personal Essay

My Journey Through Silence: Finding My Voice It was in the quietest moments that I discovered the loudest parts of myself. Growing up with a stutter, I navigated a world that often felt like it was designed for everyone but me. Conversations were minefields, and every word was a battle. Yet, it was through this journey of silence and struggle that I found my true voice, not just as a speaker, but as a person with something valuable to say.   My stutter was more than a speech impediment; it was a barrier to my identity. In school, I avoided speaking at all costs. Presentations were nightmares, and group discussions were silent movies in which I played the mute protagonist. This silence, however, became my loudest cry for self-expression. I turned to writing, where words flowed unimpeded. Writing became my refuge, but it also set the stage for a greater transformation.   The turning point came when I was asked to write a speech for a community event. Faced with the daunting task of not only writing but delivering it, I felt the familiar cloak of fear. But the message I wanted to share was louder than my fears. Standing on that stage, stuttering yet undeterred, I realized my voice’s power didn’t come from its fluency but from the truth it carried. That moment marked the beginning of a new chapter in my life.   The journey from silence to expression taught me the value of listening. I learned to listen not only to the words of others but to the unspoken messages in their pauses, their breaths, and their eyes. This deepened empathy and understanding fueled my desire to advocate for those who, like me, struggled to be heard. My personal battle had evolved into a broader mission.   My stutter, once a source of shame, became my greatest teacher. It taught me the power of perseverance, the art of listening, and the value of voice. I’ve learned that our imperfections are not limitations but invitations to find unique paths to self-expression. In finding my voice, I discovered that the most profound conversations often start in silence. And it is in embracing our vulnerabilities that we find our true strength.   This journey of overcoming, learning, and ultimately embracing my stutter has not only shaped my identity but has also shown me the universal power of resilience and the beauty of human connection through vulnerability.

Personal Essay for Students

Embracing Change: My First Year in High School Starting high school was a monumental change in my life. It was a blend of excitement and anxiety, stepping into a world that seemed so vast and unknown. I had always heard that high school was where you found yourself, where lifelong friendships were formed, and where the future started to take shape. My journey through the first year of high school taught me about adaptability, resilience, and discovering my own path.   The summer before high school, I oscillated between dreaming about the independence it would bring and fearing the challenges of new academic pressures and social dynamics. The thought of navigating a larger school with students from different backgrounds and the pressure to perform well academically loomed large. Yet, there was this underlying current of excitement about joining clubs, exploring new subjects, and the chance to redefine myself.   The first day was a whirlwind of emotions. The hallways were bustling with students, and the air was thick with anticipation. I remember feeling like a small fish in a big pond, surrounded by unfamiliar faces and the daunting task of finding my classrooms. It was overwhelming, but there was a sense of adventure in not knowing what each day would bring.   Adapting to the academic rigor of high school was challenging. The workload was heavier, and the expectations were higher than I was accustomed to. I learned the hard way that procrastination was my enemy. Balancing homework, extracurricular activities, and personal time became a juggling act. It was during these times that I discovered the importance of time management and setting priorities. I also learned to ask for help when I needed it, whether it was from teachers or classmates, which was a humbling and educational experience in itself.   Socially, high school was a maze. Finding where I fit in was not immediate or easy. I joined clubs and sports teams to meet people with similar interests, which helped me form friendships. Some of these friendships fizzled out, while others grew stronger, teaching me about the qualities I valued in friendships and in myself. It was a time of self-discovery, of figuring out my interests, beliefs, and values.   One of the most significant lessons from my first year was learning to embrace change. Change was constant, whether it was adapting to new teachers’ styles, the evolving dynamics of friendships, or my own personal growth. I learned that change wasn’t something to fear but to embrace as an opportunity for growth. It taught me resilience, the ability to bounce back from setbacks and to keep moving forward, even when things didn’t go as planned.   Reflecting on my first year of high school, I realize it was a year of growth, challenges, and invaluable lessons. It was the beginning of understanding who I am and who I want to become. High school is a journey of transformation, and my first year laid the foundation for the rest of my high school experience. It taught me that while change is inevitable, how I respond to it is within my control. This realization has empowered me to face the future with optimism and an open heart, ready for whatever comes my way.

Personal Essay about Yourself

A Tapestry of Memories: My Story Life, in its essence, is a collection of moments, each thread in the tapestry of our existence weaving a unique story. My story is one of resilience, curiosity, and the relentless pursuit of passion, marked by moments of triumph and trials that have shaped me into who I am today.   Born into a family that valued education and hard work above all, I was taught from a young age that the pursuit of knowledge was not just a journey but a responsibility. My childhood was filled with books and the encouragement to question, explore, and dream. This instilled in me a deep-seated love for learning, whether it was understanding the mechanics behind a toy car or unraveling the mysteries of the stars. My parents, my first and forever teachers, nurtured this curiosity, teaching me that every question had an answer and every problem a solution.   However, life has its way of testing our mettle. During my teenage years, I faced a significant health challenge that threatened to derail my academic and personal life. Days in the hospital and long periods of recovery became my routine, turning my world upside down. This period was a crucible, testing my resilience and forcing me to find strength I never knew I had. It was a stark reminder of the fragility of life but also a powerful lesson in perseverance. I learned to adapt, to find joy in the smallest of victories, and to keep moving forward, even when the path was obscured by uncertainty.   My passion for learning transformed into a love for writing as I navigated through these trials. Writing became my solace, a way to express the whirlwind of emotions and to document my journey through recovery. It was through this medium that I discovered my voice and the power of storytelling. Writing allowed me to step outside my circumstances and to see my story as part of a larger narrative of hope and resilience. It became a catalyst for my recovery, offering a sense of purpose and direction.   As I emerged from this challenging chapter, my perspective on life had irrevocably changed. I realized that our experiences, both good and bad, are not just isolated incidents but stepping stones in our journey of personal growth. This realization fueled my desire to make a difference, to use my experiences and my voice to inspire others facing their own battles.   Today, I stand as a testament to the power of resilience, the importance of curiosity, and the strength found in vulnerability. My journey has taught me that while we cannot control every aspect of our lives, we can choose how we respond to the challenges we face. I have chosen to face mine with optimism, courage, and an unwavering commitment to growth.   In sharing my story, I hope to light a spark in others, to encourage them to embrace their own journeys with courage and to remind them that they are not alone in their struggles. Life is an intricate tapestry of memories, and each of us has a unique story to tell. My story is one of countless threads in the vast tapestry of human experience, a reminder that our stories, in all their complexity and beauty, are what truly make us who we are.

Personal Essay Ideas & Topics with Samples to Edit & Download

• How do you handle fear
• My best friend essay
• The impact of family traditions
• A place you try to avoid
• An event that changed your life
• Childhood memories
• Describe a person you admire
• Had a Dream Come True
• How do you make hard decisions
• The best moment of your life
• What is a book you love
• Your bravest moment
• A row with my peers
• What makes you proud

Personal Essay Examples & Templates

Personal narrative essay template.

Personal Interview Essay Template

Personal Reflective Essay Template

Scholarship Personal Sample

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Personal Narrative

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Nursing Essay Example

ukessays.com

Personal Descriptive

factmonster.com

Personal Reflective Example

tailoredessays.com

Short Personal Essay

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Personal Experience

essaylib.com

Statement Essay Sample

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Importance of a Personal Essay

Essays, in general, covers different topics. A personal essay may discuss about prominent people or the writer himself/herself. Like other essays, a personal essay is basically written to inform the readers. You may also see tips for writing an effective essay .

Writing a conclusion for essay helps a writer practice the expression of personal opinion. It also helps in improving the writer’s skill in communicating with the readers. Because a personal essay is a mixture of facts and opinions on a particular matter, the readers may be able to learn about such topic while at the same time learning about the writer’s opinion.

In an application writing , a personal essay can help an individual inform the admission committee about his/her qualifications for a certain job or school admission.

How to Write Personal Essay

Writing a personal essay is a journey into your own experiences, emotions, and insights. It’s an opportunity to share your story, reflect on your life’s events, and express your unique perspective. Here’s a comprehensive guide to crafting a compelling personal essay.

1. Choose Your Topic

• Reflect on Your Experiences : Think about moments in your life that have shaped who you are. These can be milestones, challenges, triumphs, or even everyday occurrences that hold special meaning.
• Identify Your Message : Determine the insight or message you want to convey through your story. What do you want the reader to learn or feel?

2. Create an Outline

• Introduction : Start with a hook to grab the reader’s attention, followed by a brief overview of the story you will tell. Conclude with a thesis statement that encapsulates the main theme of your essay.
• Body Paragraphs : Outline each paragraph with a main idea that supports your thesis. Include specific details, experiences, and reflections.
• Conclusion : Plan to tie your narrative together, restate your thesis in a new light, and leave the reader with something to think about.

3. Write with Authenticity and Emotion

• Be Honest : Authenticity resonates with readers. Share your true thoughts, feelings, and experiences.
• Show, Don’t Tell : Use descriptive language to show the reader what happened and how it affected you. Include sensory details to bring your story to life.

4. Structure Your Essay

• Introduction : Begin with an engaging hook. Provide background information and introduce the central theme or question of your essay.
• Body Paragraphs : Each paragraph should focus on a specific event or aspect of your story. Use transitions to smoothly connect ideas and maintain flow.
• Conclusion : Reflect on the story and its implications. Highlight how the experiences have shaped you or changed your perspective.

5. Edit and Revise

• Take a Break : After writing your first draft, take some time away from it. This will help you return with a fresh perspective.
• Read Aloud : Reading your essay out loud can help you catch awkward phrasing and grammatical errors.
• Seek Feedback : Share your essay with trusted friends or mentors. Constructive feedback can offer new insights and help improve your writing.
• Revise : Focus on clarity, coherence, and conciseness. Ensure each sentence serves a purpose and supports your thesis.

6. Pay Attention to the Details

• Follow Guidelines : If you’re writing for a specific purpose (like a college application), make sure to follow any given instructions or word limits.
• Check Grammar and Spelling : Use tools or have someone proofread your essay to catch any mistakes.

7. Reflect on Your Growth

A personal essay is not just about recounting events; it’s about showing how those events have led to personal growth or a change in perspective. Reflect on what you’ve learned and how you’ve changed.

8. Conclusion

Writing a personal essay is an opportunity to delve into your own story and share it with the world. It requires introspection, honesty, and a willingness to be vulnerable. By following these steps, you can craft an essay that not only tells your story but also touches the hearts and minds of your readers. Remember, the most powerful essays come from a place of truth and a desire to communicate genuinely.

What are the Essential Elements of Personal Essay

1. a clear theme or thesis.

• Every personal essay should have a central theme or thesis that guides the narrative. This theme is the essay’s underlying message or insight that you wish to convey to your readers. It should be evident throughout the essay, providing coherence and unity to your story.

2. A Strong Opening

• The opening of your essay should immediately engage the reader. It can be a provocative question, a striking anecdote, a vivid description, or an intriguing statement. The goal is to pique the reader’s interest and set the tone for the rest of the essay.

3. Personal Experience and Anecdotes

• The heart of a personal essay lies in the author’s experiences. Detailed anecdotes and personal stories not only make the essay relatable but also help to illustrate the essay’s main theme. These narratives should be vivid, descriptive, and emotive, allowing readers to see through the author’s eyes.

4. Authentic Voice

• A personal essay should reflect the unique voice and personality of the author. It’s an opportunity to express yourself in a personal and intimate manner. Your voice should be consistent throughout the essay, giving readers a sense of who you are.

5. Reflective Insight

• Beyond narrating events, a personal essay should delve into what these experiences mean to the author. It involves analyzing events, drawing lessons, and reflecting on the impact these have had on your life or perspective. This reflective insight differentiates a personal essay from mere storytelling.

6. Emotional Resonance

• Emotional resonance helps to connect with the reader on a deeper level. By sharing feelings, vulnerabilities, and personal struggles, you invite the reader into your world. The ability to evoke empathy or emotional response is a powerful tool in personal essays.

7. A Thoughtful Conclusion

• The conclusion of a personal essay should not only wrap up the narrative but also leave the reader with something to ponder. It could be a reflection on the journey, insights gained, or questions raised by the essay. A strong conclusion reinforces the essay’s theme and echoes the emotional or intellectual impact of your story.

8. Clear, Concise Language

• While personal essays are expressive, they also benefit from clear, concise language. Avoid overly complex sentences or unnecessary jargon. The goal is to communicate your story and insights in an accessible and engaging manner.

9. Craftsmanship in Writing

• Attention to the craft of writing—such as the use of vivid imagery, metaphorical language, and a well-structured narrative—can significantly enhance the impact of a personal essay. It’s not just what you say but how you say it that matters.

Tips and Guidelines in Writing a Personal Essay

A personal essay can be written for different purposes. An effectively written personal essay has the ability to inform the readers, while at the same time, inspiring them. In writing a personal essay (or essay examples in doc ), a writer must keep the following things in mind.

1. Pick a topic.

Choose a topic that is both timely and significant in your area. Your life story can also be considered as a great topic in writing your personal essay. You may also see personal essay examples & samples.

2. Determine the focus.

You cannot cover everything, so find an angle which you can focus on.

3. Know the purpose.

See if you can satisfy your purpose in writing your composition.

4. Create an outline.

Essay   Outlines provide a better division and organization of ideas. This gives the writer a direction on what to focus on.

5. Write the draft.

With a draft, you will be able to write without hesitations or restrictions.

6. Provide the facts.

Research on the topic you want to write about and provide the facts. You may also like samples of formal essays .

7. Share your opinions.

Share what you think about the topic.

8. Be consistent.

Remain focused on your topic throughout your whole composition.

9. Write simply and briefly.

Using simple language will enable you to explain your topic clearly, at the same time helping you to effectively shorten your sentences and paragraph. You may also check out analytical essay examples & samples.

10. Edit your essay.

Improve your short essay by rechecking and reviewing for errors.

Personal Essay Generator

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Write a Personal Essay on a life-changing experience.

Discuss a moment of failure and what you learned from it in your Personal Essay.

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5.46: Assignment- Personal Analysis Essay

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Personal Analysis Essay Introduction

This module will ask you to practice the stages of the writing process. You will develop an essay about your personal experiences relating to your ethical values, to be finalized by the end of this module.

This essay asks you to reflect on your own ethical values. As a writer, you have two options in crafting this essay:

• You can narrate and reflect on the process of “coming to consciousness,” focusing on a personal experience(s) leading to a deeper awareness of a social or ethical issue or a more general commitment to social justice. For example, you might write about one or two key influences on your ethical development. The influence(s) may be person(s), experience(s), religion(s) or text(s) (e.g., books, films). You might write about the development of a generalized social consciousness, or focus on your experiences of becoming aware of social issues such as climate change, hunger, gender inequality, or unemployment.
• You can focus on “ethics in action,” reflecting on an experience or moral choice that affirmed a personal commitment to particular ethical or social values. Some writers may choose a pivotal life choice or moral decision, while others focus on “everyday ethics,” smaller expressions of ethical values such as compassion, cooperation, or integrity in daily settings such as colleges, workplaces, homes, houses of worship, or playing fields. You might write about the difficulty of living up to your ethical standards, or narrate an internal struggle or confusion about what you believe in respect to a particular question or issue.

Be richly descriptive in your writing. Take the reader inside the experience(s) to appreciate its power. When focusing on an individual or a setting, for example, use rich description; include dialogue, if appropriate. Alternately, if you are writing about a film, book, or political speech, describe visual images, scenes, quotations, or excerpts to communicate the power of the text(s).

Writing Ideas

If you are (or have been) involved in community service, this assignment enables you to draw on that experience. If you have a strongly held position on a social issue (such as capital punishment, gun control, or abortion rights), this essay offers you the opportunity to trace the roots of that stance or show how your position on this issue influences your daily life. Remember that writing about an internal ethical conflict or confusion is an option.

Assignment Details

The final essay will be 500-750 words long. It will include a thesis statement that is supported by evidence. It will be well-organized, and display evidence of careful application of the writing process.

In order to successfully complete this assessment, a submitted essay must reach “Meets or Exceeds Expectations” in all categories.

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10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

• Essay 1: Summer Program
• Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
• Essay 3: Why Medicine
• Essay 4: Love of Writing
• Essay 5: Starting a Fire
• Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
• Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
• Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
• Essay 9: Eritrea
• Essay 10: Journaling
• Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally. 

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read. 

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.”  They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great. 

Table of Contents

Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.  

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day? 

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture. 

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality. 

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration. 

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars. 

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”.  They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in. 

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite. 

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin. 

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose. 

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.  

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res  is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side.  Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents. 

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger  waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I  am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate,  perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student  from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient  streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells.  Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and  Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books  borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is.  No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted  dunes.  No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother,  her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes).  It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too  early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal  lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no  films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus  Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time.  You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the  crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells.  I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding  against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a  sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting  in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero .  I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic.  “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.”  Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential.  Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader. 

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay. 

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

How to Write an Analysis Essay: Examples + Writing Guide

An analysis / analytical essay is a standard assignment in college or university. You might be asked to conduct an in-depth analysis of a research paper, a report, a movie, a company, a book, or an event. In this article, you’ll find out how to write an analysis paper introduction, thesis, main body, and conclusion, and analytical essay example.

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So, what is an analytical essay? This type of assignment implies that you set up an argument and analyze it using a range of claims. The claims should be supported by appropriate empirical evidence. Note that you need to explore both the positive and negative sides of the issue fully.

Analytical skills are the key to getting through your academic career. Moreover, they can be useful in many real-life situations. Keep reading this article by Custom-writing experts to learn how to write an analysis!

❓ What Is an Analytical Essay?

• 🤔 Getting Started

📑 Analytical Essay Outline

• 📔 Choosing a Title
• 💁 Writing an Introduction
• 🏋 Writing a Body
• 🏁 Writing a Conclusion

🔗 References

Before you learn how to start an analysis essay, you should understand some fundamentals of writing this type of paper. It implies that you analyze an argument using a range of claims supported by facts . It is essential to understand that in your analysis essay, you’ll need to explore the negative sides of the issue and the positive ones. That’s what distinguishes an analytical essay from, say, a persuasive one.

These are the steps to write an academic paper :

• Review the literature . Before starting any paper, you should familiarize yourself with what has already been written in the field. And the analytical essay is no exception. The easiest way is to search on the web for the information.
• Brainstorm ideas. After you’ve done your search, it is time for a brainstorm! Make a list of topics for your analysis essay, and then choose the best one. Generate your thesis statement in the same way.
• Prepare an outline . Now, when you’ve decided on the topic and the thesis statement of your analytical essay, think of its structure. Below you will find more detailed information on how your paper should be structured.
• Write the first draft. You’ve done a lot of work by now. Congratulations! Your next goal is to write the first version of your analysis essay, using all the notes that you have. Remember, you don’t need to make it perfect!
• Polish your draft. Now take your time to polish and edit your draft to transform it into the paper’s final version.

You are usually assigned to analyze an article, a book, a movie, or an event. If you need to write your analytical essay on a book or an article, you’ll have to analyze the style of the text, its main points, and the author’s purported goals.

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🤔 Analytical Essay: Getting Started

The key to writing an analysis paper is to choose an argument that you will defend throughout it. For example: maybe you are writing a critical analysis paper on George Orwell’s Animal Farm The first and imperative task is to think about your thesis statement. In the case of Animal Farm , the argument could be:

In Orwell’s Animal Farm , rhetoric and language prove to be more effective ways to keep social control than physical power.

The University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill gives a great explanation of the thesis statement , how to create one, and what its function is.

But that’s not all. Once you have your thesis statement, you need to break down how you will approach your analysis essay to prove your thesis. To do this, follow these steps:

• Define the main goal(s) of your analysis . Remember that it is impossible to address each and every aspect in a single paper. Know your goal and focus on it.
• Conduct research , both online and offline, to clarify the issue contained within your thesis statement.
• Identify the main parts of the issue by looking at each part separately to see how it works.
• Try to clearly understand how each part works.
• Identify the links between the various aspects of the topic .
• By using the information you found, try to solve your main problem .

At this point, you should have a clear understanding of both the topic and your thesis statement. You should also have a clear direction for your analysis paper firmly planted in your mind and recorded in writing.

This will give you what you need to produce the paper’s outline.

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An outline is the starting point for your work. A typical analytical essay features the usual essay structure. A 500-word essay should consist of a one-paragraph introduction, a three-paragraph body, and a one-paragraph conclusion. Find below a great analytical essay outline sample. Feel free to use it as an example when doing your own work!

Analysis Essay: Introduction

• Start with a startling statement or provocative question.

“All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal”. Animal Farm abounds in ironic and provocative phrases to start an analytical essay.

• Introduce the work and its author.
• Give background information that would help the reader understand your opinion.
• Formulate a thesis statement informing the reader about the purpose of the essay. Essay format does not presuppose telling everything possible on the given topic. Thus, a thesis statement tells what you are going to say, implying what you will not discuss, establishing the limits.

In Animal Farm, Orwell uses different irony types to ridicule totalitarianism to manifest its inability to make every member of society equal and happy.

Analysis Essay: Body

The analytical essay structure requires 2-3 developmental paragraphs, each dedicated to one separate idea confirming your thesis statement. The following template should be used for each of the body paragraphs.

• Start with a topic sentence that supports an aspect of your thesis.

Dramatic irony is used in Animal Farm to point out society’s ignorance.

• Continue with textual evidence (paraphrase, summary, direct quotations, specific details). Use several examples that substantiate the topic sentence.

Animals are unaware of the fact that Boxer was never sent to the hospital. He was sent to the slaughterhouse. However, the reader and writer understand that this is a lie.

• Conclude with an explanation.

By allowing the readers to learn some essential facts before the characters, dramatic irony creates suspense and shows how easy it is to persuade and manipulate the public.

Analysis Essay Conclusion

The next four points will give you a short instruction on how to conclude an analytical essay.

• Never use new information or topics here.
• Restate your thesis in a different formulation.
• Summarize the body paragraphs.
• Comment on the analyzed text from a new perspective.

📔 Choosing a Title for Your Analysis Essay

Choosing a title seems like not a significant step, but it is actually very important. The title of your critical analysis paper should:

• Entice and engage the reader
• Be unique and capture the readers’ attention
• Provide an adequate explanation of the content of the essay in just a few carefully chosen words

In the Animal Farm example, your title could be:

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“How Do the Pigs Manage to Keep Social Control on Animal Farm?”

Analysis Essay Topics

• Analyze the media content.
• Analyze the specifics and history of hip-hop culture.
• Sociological issues in the film Interstellar .
• Discuss the techniques M. Atwood uses to describe social issues in her novel The Handmaid’s Tale .
• Compare and analyze the paintings of Van Gogh and George Seurat.
• Analysis of Edgar Allan Poe’s The Black Cat .
• Examine the juvenile crime rates.
• Describe the influence of different parenting styles on children’s mind.
• Analyze the concept of the Ship of Theseus .
• Compare and analyze the various views on intelligence .
• Analysis of The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman .
• Discuss the techniques used by W. Shakespeare in A Midsummer Night’s Dream .
• Analyze the biography of Frederic Chopin .
• Manifestation of the Chicano culture in the artwork An Ofrenda for Dolores del Rio .
• Similarities and differences of Roman, Anglo-Saxon, and Spanish Empires .
• Describe the problem of stalking and its impact on human mental health.
• Examine the future of fashion .
• Analyze the topicality of the article Effectiveness of Hand Hygiene Interventions in Reducing Illness Absence .
• Discuss Thomas Paine’s impact on the success of American revolution.
• Meaningful messages in Recitatif by Toni Morrison .
• Explore the techniques used by directors in the film Killing Kennedy .
• Compare the leadership styles of Tang Empress Wu Zetian and the Pharaoh Cleopatra .
• Evaluate the credibility of Kristof’s arguments in his article Remote Learning Is Often an Oxymoron .
• Analyze genetically modified food .
• Examine the influence of Europeans on Indian tribes in The Narrative of the Captivity and Restoration of Mrs. Mary Rowlandson .
• Describe the rhetoric techniques used in The Portrait of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde .
• The importance of fighting against violence in communities in the documentary film The Interrupters .
• Analyze indoor and outdoor pollution .
• Analyze the issue of overprotective parenthood .
• Explore the connection between eating habits and advertisement.
• Discuss the urgence of global warming issue .
• Influence of sleep on people’s body and mental health.
• Analyze the relationship between Christianity and sports .
• Discuss the concept of leadership and its significance for company efficiency.
• Analyze the key lessons of the book Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki .
• Examine the specifics of nursing ethic .
• The theme of emotional sufferings in the short story A Rose for Emily .
• Analysis of bias in books for children .
• Analyze the rhetoric of the article Public Monuments .
• Describe the main messages in Jean-Paul Sartre’s Nausea .
• Explore the problem of structural racism in healthcare .
• The reasons of tango dance popularity.
• The shortcomings of the American educational system in Waiting for Superman.
• Analyze and compare Erin’s Law and Megan’s Law .
• Analyze the James Madison’s essay Federalist 10 .
• Examine symbols in the movie The Joker .
• Compare the thematic connection and stylistic devices in the poems The Road Not Taken and Find Your Way .
• Describe and analyze the life of Eddie Bernice Johnson .
• Explore the social classes in America .
• Crucial strengths and weaknesses of the main translation theories .

💁 Writing Your Analytical Essay Introduction

You must understand how to compose an introduction to an analysis paper. The University of Wollongong describes the introduction as a “map” of any writing. When writing the introduction, follow these steps:

• Provide a lead-in for the reader by offering a general introduction to the topic of the paper.
• Include your thesis statement , which shifts the reader from the generalized introduction to the specific topic and its related issues to your unique take on the essay topic.
• Present a general outline of the analysis paper.

Watch this great video for further instructions on how to write an introduction to an analysis essay.

Example of an Analytical Essay Introduction

“Four legs good, two legs bad” is one of the many postulates invented by George Orwell for his characters in Animal Farm to vest them with socialist ideology and control over the animal population. The social revolution on Manor Farm was built on language instruments, first for the collective success of the animals, and later for the power consolidation by the pigs. The novel was written in 1945 when the transition from limitless freedoms of socialist countries transformed into dictatorship. Through his animal protagonists, the author analyzes the reasons for peoples’ belief in the totalitarian regime. In Orwell’s Animal Farm , rhetoric and language prove to be more effective ways to keep social control than physical power.

🏋 Writing Your Analytical Essay Body

The body of the paper may be compared to its heart. This is the part where you show off your talent for analysis by providing convincing, well-researched, and well-thought-out arguments to support your thesis statement. You have already gathered the information, and now all you may start crafting your paper.

To make the body of an analytical essay, keep the following in mind:

• Discuss one argument per paragraph , although each argument can relate to multiple issues
• Strike a balance between writing in an unbiased tone, while expressing your personal opinion
• Be reasonable when making judgments regarding any of the problems you discuss
• Remember to include the opposing point of view to create a balanced perspective

The bottom line is: you want to offer opposing views, but you must pose your arguments so they will counter those opposing views and prove your point of view. Follow these steps when constructing each body paragraph:

• Choose the main sentence. The main or topic sentence will be the first line in your essay. The topic sentence is responsible for presenting the argument you will discuss in the paragraph and demonstrate how this argument relates to the thesis statement.
• Provide the context for the topic sentence , whether it relates to a quote, a specific incident in society, or something else. Offer evidence on who, what, where, when, why, and how.
• Give your analysis of the argument and how it adequately proves your thesis.
• Write a closing sentence that sums up the paragraph and provides a transition to the following paragraph.

Example of an Analytical Essay Body

Literacy can grant power, provided that there are animals who cannot read or write. In the beginning, the animals’ literacy and intellect are relatively the same. Old Major is the cleverest pig; he is the kind old philosopher, like Karl Marx or Vladimir Lenin. During his retirement, he develops a theory that all humans are the root of evil. His speech was the foundation for the pigs’ assumption of power. They refined his ideas into a new ideology and called it Animalism. They also learned how to read. It allowed the pigs to declare themselves the “mind workers.” Therefore, the pigs’ literacy assured the illiterate animals in their objective superiority.

Meanwhile, as the pigs were the intellectual elite, they were not supposed to work, which raised their social status by itself. Snowball tried to promote education among all the animals, but most of them failed to master the alphabet. This is a metaphor for the general public being predominantly ignorant and easy to manipulate. At the same time, Boxer and other animals that spend most of the day in hard work merely have no time to develop their intellect. Thus, the pigs’ intention to build a school for pig children was highly efficient. Unequal access to education and unequal ability to express one’s thoughts in perspective reinforce the social divide, making the pigs smarter and more powerful and undermining other animals’ self-esteem.

At this point, the pigs resort to propaganda and rhetoric. Squealer uses his oratorical gift to refine the pigs’ message to the other animals. Upon Napoleon’s order, he breaks the Seven Commandments of farm governance. At night, he climbs the ladder to change them, and once even falls from the ladder trying to change the commandment on alcohol. The “proletarian” animals soon forget what the Seven Commandments were like in the first place and are unsure if they have ever been altered. Further on, Minimus writes a poem praising Napoleon. Finally, Squealer replaces the Commandments with a single assertion: “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.” Language is no longer used to convince. It is used to control and manipulate.

🏁 Writing Your Analytical Essay Conclusion

The conclusion is short and sweet. It summarizes everything you just wrote in the essay and wraps it up with a beautiful shiny bow. Follow these steps to write a convincing conclusion:

• Repeat the thesis statement and summarize your argument. Even when using the best summary generator for the task, reread it to make sure all the crucial points are included.
• Take your argument beyond what is simply stated in your paper. You want to show how it is essential in terms of the bigger picture. Also, you may dwell on the influence on citizens of the country.

Example of an Analytical Essay Conclusion

Because of everything mentioned above, it becomes clear that language and rhetoric can rise to power, establish authority, and manipulate ordinary people. Animal Farm is the simplified version of a communist society. It shows how wise philosophers’ good intentions can be used by mean leaders to gain unopposed power and unconditional trust. Unfortunately, this can lead to the death of many innocent animals, i.e., people, as totalitarianism has nothing to do with people’s rule. Therefore, language and oratory are potent tools that can keep people oppressed and weak, deprive them of any chance for improvement and growth, and make them think that there is no other possible existence.

Now you are ready to write an analysis essay! See, it’s easier than you thought.

Of course, it’s always helpful to see other analysis essay examples. The University of Arkansas at Little Rock provides some great examples of an analytical paper .

✏️ Analysis Essay FAQ

A great analytical paper should be well-structured, cohesive, and logically consistent. Each part of the essay should be in its place, creating a smooth and easy-to-read text. Most importantly, the statements should be objective and backed by arguments and examples.

It is a paper devoted to analyzing a certain topic or subject. An analysis essay is all about reviewing certain details of the subject and interpreting them. For example, such an analysis for a poem includes a description of artistic means that helped the poet convey the idea.

Writing an analytical essay on a book/movie/poem start with an outline. Point out what catches the eye when reviewing the subject. See how these details can be interpreted. Make sure that you refer to the main idea/message. Add an appropriate introduction and a logical conclusion.

Being more analytical in writing can be essential for a student. This is a skill that can be self-taught: try to start noticing subtle details and describe them. As you write, interpret the facts and strive to draw conclusions. Try to be as objective as possible.

• Elements of Analysis
• How Can I Create Stronger Analysis?
• How to Write a Literary Analysis Essay: Bucks.edu
• Essay Structure | – Harvard College Writing Center
• Analytical Writing: Looking Closely (Colostate.edu)
• Analytical Thesis Statements – University of Arizona
• Writing an analytic essay – UTSC – University of Toronto
• Organizing Your Analysis // Purdue Writing Lab
• How to Write an Analytical Essay: 15 Steps (with Pictures)
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Module 3: Writing Process

Performance assessment: personal analysis essay, personal analysis essay introduction.

This module will ask you to practice the stages of the writing process. You will develop an essay about your personal experiences relating to your ethical values, to be finalized by the end of this module.

This essay asks you to reflect on your own ethical values. As a writer, you have two options in crafting this essay:

• You can narrate and reflect on the process of “coming to consciousness,” focusing on a personal experience(s) leading to a deeper awareness of a social or ethical issue or a more general commitment to social justice. For example, you might write about one or two key influences on your ethical development. The influence(s) may be person(s), experience(s), religion(s) or text(s) (e.g., books, films). You might write about the development of a generalized social consciousness, or focus on your experiences of becoming aware of social issues such as climate change, hunger, gender inequality, or unemployment.
• You can focus on “ethics in action,” reflecting on an experience or moral choice that affirmed a personal commitment to particular ethical or social values. Some writers may choose a pivotal life choice or moral decision, while others focus on “everyday ethics,” smaller expressions of ethical values such as compassion, cooperation, or integrity in daily settings such as colleges, workplaces, homes, houses of worship, or playing fields. You might write about the difficulty of living up to your ethical standards, or narrate an internal struggle or confusion about what you believe in respect to a particular question or issue.

Be richly descriptive in your writing. Take the reader inside the experience(s) to appreciate its power. When focusing on an individual or a setting, for example, use rich description; include dialogue, if appropriate. Alternately, if you are writing about a film, book, or political speech, describe visual images, scenes, quotations, or excerpts to communicate the power of the text(s).

Writing Ideas

If you are (or have been) involved in community service, this assignment enables you to draw on that experience. If you have a strongly held position on a social issue (such as capital punishment, gun control, or abortion rights), this essay offers you the opportunity to trace the roots of that stance or show how your position on this issue influences your daily life. Remember that writing about an internal ethical conflict or confusion is an option.

Assignment Details

The final essay will be 500-750 words long.  It will include a thesis statement that is supported by evidence.  It will be well-organized, and display evidence of careful application of the writing process.

In order to successfully complete this assessment, a submitted essay must reach “Meets or Exceeds Expectations” in all categories.

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• Revision and Adaptation. Provided by : Lumen Learning. License : CC BY-NC-SA: Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike
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• Writing and Rhetoric: Rhetoric and Social Issues Essay 1. Authored by : Walsh. Provided by : MIT OpenCourseware. Located at : https://ocw.mit.edu/courses/comparative-media-studies-writing/21w-011-writing-and-rhetoric-rhetoric-and-contemporary-issues-fall-2015/assignments/major-writing-assignments/ . License : CC BY-NC-SA: Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike

Rhetorical Analysis : my Life

This essay about “My Life” offers a comprehensive analysis of rhetorical elements such as ethos, pathos, and logos. It emphasizes how personal narratives can effectively engage, persuade, and inspire readers. By examining the credibility, emotional appeal, and logical reasoning within the narrative, readers gain insights into the power of self-expression and storytelling. Ultimately, it highlights the transformative potential of reflecting on one’s own experiences and beliefs, showcasing the profound impact of personal narrative in shaping our understanding of ourselves and the world around us.

How it works

In the realm of rhetorical analysis, there exists an endless array of topics awaiting exploration. However, none are as intimately profound and universally relatable as the examination of one’s own life. Delving into the intricacies of personal experiences, beliefs, and emotions not only unveils the complexity of individual narratives but also offers invaluable insights into the art of persuasion. In this essay, we embark on a journey of self-discovery as we analyze the rhetorical elements within the narrative of “My Life.

Thesis Statement: Through a meticulous examination of ethos, pathos, and logos, the rhetorical analysis of “My Life” illuminates the artistry inherent in self-expression, highlighting the power of personal narrative to engage, persuade, and inspire.

Ethos: The foundation of any persuasive endeavor lies in establishing credibility and trustworthiness, and “My Life” is no exception. The author strategically employs ethos by offering glimpses into their personal background, experiences, and values. By sharing intimate details of their journey, the author builds rapport with the audience, positioning themselves as a credible narrator worthy of attention and respect. For instance, anecdotes about overcoming adversity or achieving personal milestones serve to bolster the author’s ethos, evoking empathy and admiration from the audience.

Emotional appeal is a potent tool in the arsenal of persuasion, and “My Life” harnesses this power to captivate and resonate with its audience on a visceral level. Through vivid imagery, evocative language, and poignant storytelling, the author elicits a wide range of emotions, from joy and nostalgia to sorrow and empathy. By inviting readers to vicariously experience the highs and lows of their journey, the author forges an emotional connection that transcends mere rhetoric, fostering a profound sense of empathy and understanding.

While ethos and pathos serve to establish credibility and evoke emotions, logos grounds the narrative in reason and logic, lending it intellectual depth and coherence. Throughout “My Life,” the author employs logical arguments, rational explanations, and cogent reasoning to support their claims and assertions. Whether recounting pivotal life decisions, analyzing complex situations, or presenting arguments for personal beliefs, the author demonstrates a keen awareness of logical persuasion, appealing to the audience’s intellect and reason.

In conclusion, the rhetorical analysis of “My Life” unveils the artistry inherent in self-expression, illustrating the profound impact of personal narrative in engaging, persuading, and inspiring others. Through the strategic use of ethos, pathos, and logos, the author crafts a narrative that is both compelling and persuasive, inviting readers to reflect on their own experiences and beliefs. Ultimately, “My Life” serves as a testament to the transformative power of storytelling, reminding us of the boundless potential of personal narrative to shape, influence, and enrich our lives.

In the journey of rhetorical analysis, exploring one’s own life narrative not only offers a rich tapestry of rhetorical elements but also serves as a profound exercise in self-reflection and introspection. As we unravel the intricacies of our own stories, we gain a deeper understanding of ourselves and the world around us, reaffirming the timeless adage that the most powerful stories are often the ones we write ourselves.

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PapersOwl.com. (2024). Rhetorical Analysis : My Life . [Online]. Available at: https://papersowl.com/examples/rhetorical-analysis-my-life/ [Accessed: 14-Apr-2024]

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