essay about we love breaking the rules

Personal Narrative Essay: Breaking The Rules

Sometimes it's ok to break the rule. Like when I really needed some clothes, and my mom said no but i still got them anyways. Like when katniss was not supposed to go into the forest, but she had to because her family needed food. A Lot of people break the rules and sometimes it’s ok only for good reasons like if someone got their phones taken up, but no one was home and they needed to call their parents to get a hold of them.

Sometimes it's not ok to break the rules like taking things to school and stealing things those are rules you shouldn't break. Some people break the rules like speeding the police will pull you over and give you a ticket. The book thank you ma’am is a good example because the boy needed some shoes and so he tried to take the lady's purse and she helped him out, but he had to do stuff to help her.

Sometimes I break the rules, but only for good reasons. One time I caught a kid stealing, and I asked him why he was stealing, and he said because he was hungry, so I gave him some money so he could pay for it. 

In conclusion, breaking the rules is not always bad. Like if something bad happens and you need your phone, but you are grounded then how are you going to call them. 

One day I was babysitting and my baby sister called the cops and she didn't know what she was doing and she left it on there and the police came to our house and they asked how old I was then they told me to call my mom and she didn't answer so the cops called her and she answer so the cops told her what was going on and she rushed to the house and then they told her that she has to power off her phone and power it back on than the cops left.

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Why Do We Follow Some Rules and Break Others?

Breaking certain social-good rules makes us feel smarter and more capable than those who follow them.

A popular saying goes, “Rules are meant to be broken.” But … why?

A Quora user writes , “rules are made to be broken because if everyone travels within the bounds of given rules, no horizons will ever be expanded. We, as a society, have the task of constantly challenging the rules and making sure we step outside of them when we mean no harm and act in the advantage of our fellow man. That doesn’t mean we should break the rules for the mere goal of breaking them. We should only break rules to better society.”

But often, that’s not the case. We break the same rules that are created for the betterment of society. The same rules that are created for our safety and well-being. We don’t wear seatbelts while driving. We spit and litter in public places. We defile public property and jump queues. We eat and use phones in places we’re not supposed to — the list of rules we break on a daily basis is endless.

If rules are meant to organize our lives, make things uniform and easier to control, why do we end up breaking them? Research offers various reasons.

For starters, people break rules because it is rewarding, in two ways. A cheater’s high comes first. Often, cheaters and rule-breakers don’t feel guilty and remorseful. Rather, researchers from the University of Washington, Harvard University and other institutions found, rule-breakers feel smarter and more capable along with being in an unexpectedly good mood after breaking a rule . The second reward, they found, was that in breaking a rule, rule-breakers feel a sense of freedom. “In this freer mindset we may make random, remote associations that aren’t apparent when we’re rule-bound,” reports Jena Pincott Psychology Today .

For instance, children parented in a very strict, authoritarian mannermay defy the law because “parental control is too strict for comfort. What they can’t/couldn’t do at home finds free expression once they are outside and with friends,” theorizes Geeta Padmanaban in an article on rule-breaking in The Hindu . Humans like to defy authority and are likely to ask who are [the authority figures] to tell us when asked to do stuff, she suggests.

Rule-breaking also has less to do with people’s characters, and more the situations people find themselves in. “Often, not a lot of conscious awareness goes into when or to what extent we push ethical boundaries. We might break the rules under some conditions and in some mindsets, but not in others. Morality is so malleable that just thinking about breaking a rule can change the way we behave,” Pincott writes.

Researchers have also tried to assess whether the tendency to break rules is in any way associated with people’s IQs. An associate professor from Harvard University, Francesca Gino, and a behavioral economist at Duke University and MIT, Dan Ariely, found that, in fact, breaking a rule wasn’t also as much about people’s intelligence, as much as it was about their level of creativity. Those who cheated scored higher in divergent thinking than those who didn’t. And those who cheated more were more creative than those who cheated less. From another experiment they conducted by posing ethical dilemmas to employees in an advertising firm, the research duo found workers who had more creative jobs — for instance, the copywriters and designers — were more likely to break rules than those with less-creative jobs, like the accountants.

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“The ability of people to behave dishonestly might be bounded by their ability to cheat and at the same time feel they are moral individuals,” Gino said to The Harvard Crimson . The duo also explained that creativity allows the retelling of stories of rule-breaking to justify why it’s morally possible. Gino added, “Creativity and criminality are mutually reinforcing. The more creative you are, the more you break the rules, and the more rules you break, the more creative you get.”

Another reason to break rules comes from the need to feel or be seen as powerful. The more people care about power and winning, or feel threatened by others on their way to the top, a 2011 study found , “the faster their values fall to the wayside.” This research also found that rule-breaking is associated with perceptions of power. In an experiment, researchers had people come to the lab to interact with a rule-follower and a rule-breaker. The rule-follower was polite and acted normally; the rule-breaker arrived late, threw down his bag on a table and put up his feet. On seeing this, people thought the rule-breaker had more power and was more likely to “get others to do what he wants.”

“Norm violators are perceived as having the capacity to act as they please,” the researchers said in a statement .

A culture or organization lays down rules to promote uniformity and inclusivity. But people break rules for the sake of supporting their own tribe, too — even if the rule-breaking comes at the expense of society as a whole. If a group cheats on tests, or lies about finishing a project, then the individual is likely to support them in their lie or cover it up at the least.

And lastly, the decision to break a rule also depends on how complex the rule is. An article in the Harvard Business Review states that rules that are complex are harder to follow. “Because organizations rely on routines for following rules, complex rules would require complex routines, which would be harder to execute reliably. As expected, rule complexity increases noncompliance,” the authors write.

All in all, rules are made for a reason, created to suit a specific situation — which means that not all of them will apply every time, in every scenario, and thus, not all of them are meant to be followed. You follow some, you break some, knowingly or unknowingly, but it is important to be aware that rule-breaking leads to more rule-breaking, according to Gino’s research. Therefore, the reason for rule-breaking becomes more critical — is it because you want to feel powerful, or want to be creative? Or because you simply desire a sense of freedom? When you break a rule, you’re questioning a certain mindset. Therefore, breaking a rule in itself is not the last step — looking beyond and examining the need to adapt or create new rules typically follows. Updating an old rule will only help the rule-breaker — and everyone else.

Anubhuti Matta is an associate editor with The Swaddle. When not at work, she's busy pursuing kathak, reading books on and by women in the Middle East or making dresses out of Indian prints.

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Essay on Breaking A Rule

Students are often asked to write an essay on Breaking A Rule in their schools and colleges. And if you’re also looking for the same, we have created 100-word, 250-word, and 500-word essays on the topic.

Let’s take a look…

100 Words Essay on Breaking A Rule

Understanding rules.

Rules are like the lines on a road. They guide us and keep us safe. They help us live in harmony with others. Schools, homes, and societies all have rules. They make sure things run smoothly.

Why People Break Rules

Sometimes, people break rules. They might be curious or rebellious. They might want to feel free or just test the limits. But remember, every action has a reaction. Breaking a rule can lead to problems.

Consequences of Breaking Rules

Breaking rules can lead to trouble. At school, you might get detention. At home, you might lose privileges. In society, you might face legal consequences. It’s important to think before you act.

Learning from Mistakes

Breaking a rule can be a learning experience. It can teach us about right and wrong. It can help us understand why rules are important. So, if you break a rule, try to learn from it.

Rules are there for a reason. They help keep order and safety. Breaking them can lead to problems. But it can also be a chance to learn. Always remember, rules are our friends, not enemies.

250 Words Essay on Breaking A Rule

Rules are like road signs. They guide us on the right path. They help us know what is expected of us and what we should avoid. When we follow rules, everything runs smoothly. Like a well-oiled machine, we can all work and play together without any problems.

Breaking A Rule

Sometimes, people choose to break a rule. This might be because they don’t agree with the rule, or because they think they won’t get caught. But breaking a rule is like throwing a stone into a calm pond. It creates ripples that can affect many people.

When a rule is broken, there are usually consequences. These might be small, like getting a time-out at school. Or they might be big, like getting into trouble with the law. Consequences are meant to teach us that breaking rules is not a good idea. They remind us that rules are there to keep us safe and help us live together in peace.

Learning From Mistakes

Breaking a rule can also be a chance to learn. If we break a rule and face the consequences, we might think twice before breaking that rule again. We learn that our actions have effects on others and on ourselves. This can help us grow and become better people.

In conclusion, rules are important. They guide us and keep us safe. Breaking a rule can lead to consequences, but it can also be a chance to learn and grow. So, it’s always good to think before we act, and to remember the importance of rules in our lives.

500 Words Essay on Breaking A Rule

Rules are like a guidebook that shows us the right path in life. They are set by people who have more experience and wisdom than us. These rules help us to behave in a way that is good for us and for the people around us. For example, traffic rules help us to stay safe on the roads. School rules help us to learn and grow in a peaceful and organized environment.

What Does Breaking a Rule Mean?

Breaking a rule means not following the instructions or guidelines that are set for us. It’s like choosing to walk on a path that is not safe or right. For example, if a person chooses to cross the road when the traffic light is red, they are breaking a rule.

Why Do People Break Rules?

There are many reasons why people choose to break rules. Sometimes, they might not agree with the rule or find it too hard to follow. Other times, they might be in a hurry or not thinking clearly. Some people break rules because they like the thrill of doing something they are not supposed to do.

The Consequences of Breaking Rules

Breaking rules can lead to many problems. If you break a traffic rule, you might get into an accident or get a fine. If you break a school rule, you might get punished or even expelled. When you break a rule, you also lose the trust of people around you. They might start thinking that you are not reliable or responsible.

Sometimes, breaking a rule can also teach us a lesson. It can make us realize the importance of the rule and why it was put in place. It can help us understand that rules are not just there to control us, but to protect us and make our lives better.

In conclusion, breaking a rule is not a good thing. It can lead to problems and make people lose trust in you. It’s better to follow the rules and live a safe and peaceful life. But if you do break a rule, it’s important to learn from your mistake and try not to do it again. Remember, rules are there for a reason. They are there to guide us, protect us, and help us live a good life.

This essay is a simple and clear explanation of the topic ‘Breaking a Rule’. It is written in a way that is easy for school students to understand. It does not use complex words or phrases and sticks to the word limit of 500 words.

That’s it! I hope the essay helped you.

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Breaking the Rules: Make Your Own Path

Breaking the rules – those words can make your heart race, can’t they? Remember when you were a kid, eyeing that cookie jar your parents said was off-limits? Breaking rules felt like a secret adventure, a thrill that made you feel alive.

But as we grow up, rules get stricter, and breaking them seems scarier. Yet, what if I told you that breaking rules isn’t just about being naughty; it’s about taking charge of your own story? It’s about smashing the barriers that hold you back and making your own path in the world.

Why Breaking the Rules?

Breaking the rules isn’t just about going against the grain; it’s about feeling empowered. It’s how we show we’re independent and creative, not held back by rules or what others expect. When we break rules, we’re saying we won’t settle for less than our best.

It’s like when you decide to try something new or different, even if others say you shouldn’t. That feeling of freedom and excitement—that’s what breaking rules is all about.

Unlocking Rule-Breaking

Ever wonder why some people break rules while others stick to them? It’s not just about being rebellious; there’s more to it. Let’s look at why:

• Thinking Matters : Our brains like new things and challenging what’s normal. Rules make us curious and want to test boundaries. It’s not about being careless; it’s about wanting to explore.
• Feelings and Emotions : Sometimes, breaking rules is about expressing how we feel. Maybe we’re angry or frustrated, and breaking a rule feels like the only way to show it.
• Friends and Society : The people around us and society itself can influence whether we break rules or not. If we see others doing it, we might think it’s okay for us too. Or maybe we don’t want to disappoint our friends, so we follow the rules even if we don’t want to.

Understanding why we break rules can help us make sense of our actions and make better decisions in the future. It’s all about understanding ourselves and the world around us.

Understanding the Rules

Ever felt like there’s more to life than just following the rules? You’re not alone. Let’s talk about why breaking the rules isn’t always a bad thing. See, sticking to the same old routine might feel safe, but it can also hold us back.

By daring to think outside the box, we open doors to new possibilities and discoveries. There are many who’ve taken the road less traveled and found success. Think about innovators who challenged norms or activists who fought for change. These rebels didn’t just change the game; they invented a whole new one.

So, next time you’re told to toe the line, remember: sometimes, it’s the rule-breakers who end up making history.

Understanding Rule-Breaking Across Cultures

Ever wondered why rule-breaking varies from one culture to another? Let’s explore into the diverse perspectives on rule-breaking across different societies.

• Analyzing Attitudes : Explore how different cultures view breaking the rules. Some might see it as a challenge to authority, while others view it as disrespectful.
• Values at Play : Investigate the values that influence attitudes towards rule-breaking. For example, individualism versus collectivism can shape how rules are perceived and followed.
• Norms and Practices : Compare and contrast the norms surrounding rule-breaking in various regions. What might be acceptable in one culture could be frowned upon in another.
• Cultural Influences : Explore how cultural elements like historical background, religion and social structures impact attitudes and behaviors related to rule-breaking.

By examining these cross-cultural perspectives, we gain a deeper understanding of the complexities surrounding rule-breaking behavior across different societies. It’s a fascinating journey through the cultural dimensions of breaking the rules.

Ethical Dilemmas in Breaking the Rules

Breaking the rules can be a powerful way for individuals to grow and assert themselves, but it’s also important to think about the ethics involved.

Think about situations where breaking a rule might cause conflicts in morals or harm to others. For example, imagine breaking a rule to benefit yourself while hurting others, raising questions about fairness and what’s right.

In moments like these, it’s crucial to think about what’s morally right. Some people argue that breaking rules is okay if it helps more people, but others say rules should always be followed. Being a good person means more than just obeying rules—it means being kind and fair even when no one’s watching.

By thinking deeply about these ethical questions, we can understand better why people break rules and what it means for society as a whole.

Breaking Rules from Playground to History Books

Take a trip down memory lane to childhood. Remember those times when you sneaked a treat or bent the rules in games? Those moments were more than just mischief—they were lessons in independence and questioning authority.

Now, let’s think about history. Think about suffragettes fighting for voting rights or civil rights activists challenging segregation. Their acts of defiance weren’t just rebellions—they were catalysts for reshaping society.

Whether it’s a small act of rebellion or a monumental movement, breaking rules goes beyond mere defiance. It’s about challenging injustice, igniting change, and making a lasting impact on the world.

The Power of Rebellion

Ever stopped to think about the rules we live by? Society, culture, even our own minds, all seem to lay down the law. But what happens when we blindly follow these rules without stopping to question them?

Let’s break it down. Society tells us how to dress, who to love, what success looks like. Culture whispers traditions in our ears, shaping our values and beliefs. And then there are the personal rules we create for ourselves, based on fears, insecurities, or past experiences.

But here’s the thing: blindly obeying these rules can have consequences. It can trap us in a cycle of conformity, where we lose sight of our own dreams and desires. We become prisoners of other people’s expectations, stifling our creativity and authenticity.

But rebellion? Ah, that’s where the magic happens. When we dare to question the rules, to challenge the status quo, we unleash a power within us. We break free from the chains of conformity and forge our own paths. We discover who we truly are, what we’re capable of, and what really matters to us.

Here are some simple tips to harness the power of rebellion:

• Reflect on Your Values : Take time to identify what truly matters to you, regardless of societal norms or expectations.
• Question Everything : Don’t accept rules at face value. Ask yourself why they exist and whether they align with your values and goals.
• Start Small : Challenge minor rules or traditions in your daily life. Experiment with breaking out of your comfort zone.
• Find Support : Surround yourself with like-minded individuals who encourage and support your journey of rebellion.

Think about the rebels who changed the world. The suffragettes who fought for women’s rights, the civil rights activists who challenged segregation, the LGBTQ+ pioneers who demanded equality. They didn’t just accept the rules; they tore them down and built something better in their place.

So, the next time you feel the weight of society’s expectations bearing down on you, remember this: rebellion isn’t just an act of defiance; it’s an act of liberation. It’s reclaiming your power, your voice, your humanity. It’s saying, “I will not be confined by your rules; I will write my own story.” And that, my friend, is where the true power of rebellion lies.

Managing Challenges

Ever felt stuck following rules, not sure what to do next? Breaking free can spark creativity, innovation, and personal growth . Look at those who’ve challenged norms, forging their own paths. Whether starting a business against all odds or fighting for change, they refused to be held back.

Breaking rules isn’t just about success; it’s about overcoming challenges. Navigating resistance reveals true strength and resilience. So, when rules confine, remember: breaking them liberates. Unleash creativity, innovate fearlessly, and grow into who you’re meant to be.

Here are some unique and underrated tips to enhance your journey of managing challenges:

• Practice Radical Self-Compassion : Instead of being hard on yourself when things go wrong, be really kind to yourself. Treat yourself like you would treat a good friend going through a tough time. Doing this can help you recover from problems better.
• Experiment with Reverse Engineering : When you’re stuck on a tough problem, try something different: start by imagining the best result you could have. Then, think backward to figure out what steps would get you there. This can help you find new and creative solutions.
• Embrace the Power of “No” : In a world where being busy is praised, it’s important to be okay with saying “no.” Focus on what’s really important to you and spend your time and energy on those things. Setting limits helps you stay focused and prevents you from getting overwhelmed.
• Cultivate Beginner’s Mind : When you face challenges, try to think like a beginner. Be open-minded and curious, without assuming you already know the answers. This lets you discover new ideas and solutions without being held back by what you already know or believe.
• Practice Gratitude Amidst Adversity : When things get tough, make an effort to be thankful for the lessons you’ve learned and the chances to improve. Think about times when you’ve shown strength or made progress, or when others have been unexpectedly kind. Being grateful can help you see things differently and give you strength when times are hard.

By using these uncommon tips when facing challenges, you can grow in resilience, creativity, and personally unexpected ways.

The Challenges of Breaking the Rules

When you decide to go against the usual way of doing things, get ready for some bumps along the road. Here’s what you might face and how to deal with it:

• Criticism from Others : People might not understand why you’re doing things differently. Surround yourself with folks who get where you’re coming from.
• Fear of Messing Up : Trying something new means you might fail. But that’s okay—it’s how we learn and get better.
• Not Knowing What Comes Next : Doing something unconventional can be scary. Trust your gut and be open to changing your plans.
• Feeling Left Out or Judged : Not everyone will support your choices. Stick to what you believe in and find others who share your values.

Remember, breaking rules can be tough, but with the right mindset, you can handle whatever comes your way and find success in the end.

The Ripple Effect: Impacting Society Through Rule-Breaking

Consider this: every act of rule-breaking isn’t just a personal rebellion; it’s a catalyst for societal change. From civil rights movements to scientific breakthroughs, rule-breakers have left an indelible mark on history, reshaping the fabric of society.

Breaking the rules isn’t just about personal empowerment; it’s about challenging the structures that perpetuate inequality and injustice. By daring to defy norms, we pave the way for progress, inspiring others to question the status quo and strive for a better world.

But how does individual rebellion translate into broader social transformation? Let’s explore:

• Cultural Shifts : Every act of rebellion sends ripples through society, challenging entrenched beliefs and norms. Over time, these ripples accumulate, sparking cultural shifts and reshaping collective consciousness.
• Policy Change : History shows us that grassroots movements and acts of civil disobedience can drive significant policy change. From voting rights to environmental protection, rule-breakers have played a pivotal role in shaping legislation and governance.
• Inspiring Others : One act of rebellion can inspire countless others to follow suit, creating a ripple effect that transcends individual actions. By leading by example, rule-breakers ignite a spark of defiance in others, amplifying their impact and catalyzing change on a broader scale.
• Shifting Paradigms : Rule-breakers challenge not only specific rules but the very paradigms that underpin social structures. By daring to imagine a world beyond existing constraints, they push the boundaries of what is possible and lay the groundwork for new paradigms to emerge.

So, the next time you contemplate breaking the rules, remember the potential ripple effect it could have. Your act of defiance might just be the spark that ignites a revolution, shaping the course of history for generations to come.

Unsung Heroes Who Changed the Game

You’ve probably heard of some famous rule-breakers, but let’s shine a light on a few quieter heroes who made big waves in their own way.

Science: Rosalind Franklin

Rosalind Franklin was a science rockstar. Even though she faced a lot of hurdles because she was a woman, she played a big role in figuring out the structure of DNA. Her work set the stage for tons of breakthroughs in biology.

Literature: Audre Lorde

Audre Lorde was like a superhero with words. She wrote poems and essays that stood up to unfair treatment based on race, gender, and who you love. Her writing made people think and inspired change.

Politics: Wangari Maathai

Wangari Maathai was all about saving the planet and standing up for women. She started the Green Belt Movement to stop trees from being cut down and to give women more rights. Even though she faced pushback, she won a big prize for her efforts.

Social Activism: Bayard Rustin

Bayard Rustin was a big deal in the fight for civil rights in America. He helped organize a huge march where Martin Luther King Jr. gave his famous speech. Even though he faced prejudice for being gay, he kept fighting for equality.

These folks may not have gotten as much attention as others, but they showed us that bravery and sticking to your guns can change the world. Let’s remember their stories and keep cheering on the underdogs who make a difference.

The Essence of Breaking the Rules

As we have covered almost every aspect of breaking the rules, let’s now delve deeper into the why. Why do we feel the pull to break free from the constraints of convention and chart our own course?

We all understand that one day, our time here will end, and everything around us constantly shifts and changes. So, why do we often find ourselves simply going along with the same old rules without stopping to question why they’re there in the first place?

Consider this: throughout history, it has been the rule-breakers—the rebels, the visionaries, the pioneers—who have shaped the course of human civilization.

From the great thinkers who dared to challenge prevailing beliefs, to the revolutionaries who fought against oppressive systems, it is those who dared to color outside the lines who have made a lasting impression on the pages of history.

They understood that progress is not achieved by adhering blindly to the status quo, but by daring to imagine a world beyond it.

So, why do we break the rules? Because it is in our very nature to strive for something greater than ourselves—to push the boundaries of what is possible and create a legacy that transcends our mortal existence.

In the end, whether we are remembered as ashes or soil matters little. What truly matters is how we choose to live our lives—in pursuit of our passions, guided by our convictions, and unbound by the limitations imposed upon us. So, let us embrace our rebellious spirit, for it is through breaking the rules that we carve out our place in the annals of history.

Quotes on Breaking the Rules

Let’s take a moment to explore rule-breaking through some insightful quotes. These little nuggets of wisdom really capture what it means to rebel, innovate, and chase after change.

1. “Questioning what’s considered normal allows us to discover fresh paths ahead.”

2. “Breaking rules isn’t just about saying no; it’s about finding better yeses.”

3. “Sometimes, the biggest changes start with the smallest acts of defiance.”

4. “Rules can feel like walls, but it’s the rule-breakers who build bridges.”

5. “In the dance between old and new, rule-breakers are the ones leading the steps.”

6. “The best ideas often come from thinking beyond what’s already known.”

7. “When rules become barriers, breaking them can liberate us.”

These quotes are like little guiding lights in the dark. They remind us that breaking rules isn’t just about shaking things up; it’s about finding our own way, pushing boundaries, and making the world a bit brighter.

Breaking the rules isn’t just about being naughty; it’s about taking charge of our own story. Whether it’s challenging norms in our personal lives or reshaping society, breaking rules empowers us to think differently and push boundaries. But it’s not always easy; criticism and ethical dilemmas can arise.

Yet, through these challenges, we discover our strength and resilience. Moreover, our acts of rebellion send ripples through society, inspiring others to question the status quo and strive for a better world. So, next time you feel confined by rules, remember the power of rebellion—it’s how we truly find ourselves and drive progress forward.

Why is breaking the rules good?

Breaking the rules can sometimes be good because it helps us see things differently and find new ways to solve problems. It lets us think outside the box and be creative. But it’s important to remember that breaking rules also has consequences, so we need to be careful and responsible about when and how we do it.

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When Breaking the Rules Is the Right Thing to Do

A method to breaking the rules. Because, sometimes, you have to move around obstacles.

By Gustavo Razzetti

December 7, 2018

How to break the rules by establishing clear priorities

“The young man knows the rules, but the old man knows the exceptions.” — Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

Are rules meant to protect, help, or limit us ?

Most people are afraid to break the rules. Others believe it’s the only way to make things happen — they think rules are meant to be broken.

Some people approach life like everything is forbidden unless it’s permitted. Others think that everything is allowed until it’s explicitly prohibited.

What about you?

The problem with a rigid approach to rules is that it divides people — you are either a conformist or a rebel.

Not all rules are equal. Some were created to control people, others in a different time. Certain rules are black and white, others are open to interpretation.

Sometimes, it’s okay to break the rules.

I’m not talking about doing it randomly, but with a purpose. Choose to break the rules that limit you, not just because you don’t like them. Break the rules but consider the consequences on the rest, not just on you.

Start a Fire on Purpose

“You don’t learn to walk by following rules. You learn by doing, and by falling over.” — Richard Branson

Breaking the rules just for the sake of it makes no sense. Continually challenging everything is not courage, but a lack of focus. The fact that we can transgress something doesn’t mean we have to do it.

Break the rules that limit more than they enable.

Sometimes following the established rules is boring. That’s why people break them — to free themselves, not to send a message.

That’s what happened to William Webb Ellis back in 1823. He was tired of playing football (soccer for Americans), so the player took the ball in his arms and ran with it, thus starting a new sport: rugby , named after his school.

Those who start the fire get the credit.

Paul Berry, former CTO of the Huffington Post, recommends that the first step of breaking the rules is distinguishing between projects that are important and those that are genuinely vital.

‘Fire-starters ’ is the nickname for those who spearhead change — they don’t just start the fire, they choose when and where to ignite it. They start the fire with a purpose.

Why We Break Rules (or Not)

Sometimes we become victims of the rules we created.

When American women relocate to wealthier cities, they adopt the fashion preferences to please the locals. For example, the heel height of women’s shoes becomes higher. If a woman moves from a lower-status location to New York City, there is an 86 percent chance that she will ditch the flats for heels.

The pressure to conform is self-imposed. When we try to disagree with social norms, our brain turns on an alarm. As science shows , we have internalized judgments and preferences of other people.

Following rules is one thing. Sticking to the norms to be accepted by others is a different matter.

T.S. Elliot said, “Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.”

Breaking rules is like cheating. Behavioral scientists found a correlation between dishonesty and creativity; people with the most creative jobs or mindsets are more likely to break the rules.

The more creative one is, the easier it is to tell the story in a way that justifies breaking the rules.

There’s an emotional upside too — people who break the rules feel smarter than the rest. Maybe it’s because they aren’t conforming. They are liberated — getting rid of rules allows their brains to think freely and let their creative juices flow without limitations.

Sometimes, you have to break the rules to start a fire.

A simple method for breaking the rules

Learn the rules. Learn to play by the rules. And then learn to break them like a master.

Pablo Picasso wasn’t just a talented artist; he was one of the most prolific that ever existed. Most people associate the Spanish painter with cubism — an art movement he created. However, Picasso mastered traditional drawing and painting before he explored modern styles.

Master it before you break it — that’s what you can learn from genius minds.

Understanding when and how to break the rules requires a method. Corporate rules tend to limit their people, more than enable them to do more and be better. This is the approach I use when coaching teams to become more innovative. I use even over statements to prioritize one good thing even over another good thing. My approach includes 3 key priorities that work together; it’s not one or the other, all need to be considered before deciding whether or not to break the rules.

OUTCOME > RULE

Before breaking a rule, evaluate if the result is worth it. Will the outcome justify the consequences of breaking that rule?

Choose to start a fire when the outcome is worth it.

COMPANY VALUES > OUTCOME

Each person has their own values  — the same is true of organizations. I’m not telling you what’s right or wrong. Before deciding to break the rules, reflect on whether the decision will go against your values.

Choose to stick to your values over any ideal outcome.

COLLECTIVE GOOD > PERSONAL GAIN

Breaking rules has consequences. I’m not talking about people getting upset or not liking your behaviors; sometimes, the aftermath of your behaviors can benefit you but hurt your team or organization.

Choose the collective over your personal benefit.

Rules are meant to help us, not rule us. Organizations need fewer, simpler, and more flexible norms . However, at some point, your people might need to break existing rules to get things done. What’s more important, following the process or achieving the goals? The difference between breaking the rules for the sake of it and doing it with a purpose is establishing clear priorities. When you have to choose between two good things (agility versus process, for example), which one matters more to your company?

I believe that the outcome is more important than rules but not at the expense of company values. Also, the collective good should always be prioritized over personal gain.

Want to learn how to design rules that liberate people rather than limit them?

Join the Build a Fearless Culture program – one of the modules focuses on evaluating current rules and designing flexible, simpler, and more liberating ones.

What do you think?

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Most popular, how writing a personal contract improved my life (and tips for creating your own), i’ve remodeled 3 kitchens—these are my biggest design regrets in each one, 3 ways to optimize your closet (plus, a tour of my new closet space).

I’ve often felt just a little bit different from the crowds I’ve found myself in. A little more quiet, a little more sensitive, a little more introspective, a little more obsessed with pink kitchen appliances. I haven’t always minded. Being different can be a gift. Ironically though, for years, my inner self was dominated by a bellowing voice in my head that said, “Be different , but don’t differ .”

This message became a tyrannical “rule” that governed my life—so familiar I didn’t realize it was there at all, just like I didn’t realize not everyone operated by this same regulation.

The anatomy of a rule

This “rule” took a variety of forms: “Don’t disagree. Don’t be disagreeable. Don’t rock the boat. Don’t frustrate. Don’t argue. Don’t challenge. And don’t question the reality that’s being presented to you. Especially with the people you care about.”

As with most of the rules we find ourselves ruled by, I’m sure these must have served me well at some point. But, as an adult, they began exacerbating my relationships and, basically, shaping me into a resentful, passive-aggressive, codependent human being who didn’t say what she meant, mean what she said, or stand up for her basic needs and desires.

So that was awesome, for me and everyone else.

As is often the case, it took some major life meltdowns for me to start doing the hard work of recognizing the rules that were driving my behaviors and learning how to shift them. And by “hard work” I mean vulnerable, exhausting, expensive, slow, 100%-worth-it hard work . For me, that involved therapy, support groups, prayer, books, therapy, prayer, grace, patience, support groups, mentors, friendships, therapy, therapy, therapy.

Plus one additional factor: Practice.

And, if I were to give you two words to describe the practice of breaking your own personal rules, it’s this: uncomfortably uncomfortable.

Case in point

Several years ago, I met a guy I really liked. We met online and arranged to meet in person in front of the 10-foot rooster at the Minneapolis Farmer’s Market. This was his suggestion, and it’s still the best first date destination I’ve experienced so far. He was tall, handsome, and friendly. He bought me a jar of salsa and an iced tea, and he asked me out to dinner.

Our third date still ranks as one of my all-time favorites: The Minnesota State Fair. We sat with the butterflies. We scurried through the haunted mansion. We ate buckets of French fries. We walked and walked, and talked and talked, for hours. We closed down the fair. And when we returned to my car in the deserted parking lot, I discovered that I’d locked my keys inside.

I was mortified. But as we waited for AAA to arrive, we laughed and talked some more. It was sweet and silly, and I’ll never forget it. I was falling for him. My heart pounded.

But…my gut twisted too.

I’d felt that gut twisting before. Quite a few times, actually. But, for years, I hadn’t paid much attention to it. (Or, more accurately, I’d never known it was something I could or should pay attention to.) In the past, the only things I’d known to listen to were the pounding of my heart saying, “YOU LIKE THIS GUY AND HE LIKES YOU,” and the cacophony of rules in my head yelling, “BE NICE. BE AGREEABLE. BE TRUSTING AT ALL COSTS.”

By this point in my journey, however, I’d learned that my gut was usually dead-on. I knew it shouldn’t be ignored. And, over the course of our weeks together, I’d heard this guy tell me a certain something that just didn’t seem true. More than once. Each time, my gut twisted tighter.

I was pretty sure I was being lied to, but the thing about lies is you either have proof or you don’t. So you can wait around to see if it’s a lie, or you can trust the voice in your head saying, “SOMETHING ISN’T RIGHT HERE” and you work with that.

Oddly, it wasn’t even a big thing this guy seemed to be lying about. I wouldn’t have cared either way about the story he was telling. But that seemed concerning in itself. Why lie about something so benign?

Yet here it was. My heart was pounding and my gut was twisting.

So I had a choice, which was a good news/bad news situation. Good news because I finally realized I had a choice. Bad news because this choice was making me very uncomfortable. My lifelong rules were screaming in my head. My soft, eager heart was pounding in my chest. And this guy was sending me sweet texts and asking to see me again. Why would I want to rock this boat?!

Deep down, though, I knew it was time to practice breaking those rules, or at least bending them. It was time to trust my gut instead of blindly trusting the words I was being told.

The breaking point

So, a few days later, I said something I’d previously thought a nice girl shouldn’t say. Something I’d once believed was rude and insulting and forbidden. Something along the lines of: “I know you said X, but I happen to know Y, so I’m just curious why that seems to contradict. Can you help me understand?”

And that’s when things became more clear.

He was furious. His words were harsh and biting. He accused me of the very things the voices in my head accused me of. He hung up on me.

My heart sank.

I now had more evidence than just my gut. I still didn’t know for sure whether or not he’d lied, but I knew how he responded to someone who dared to question him. It seemed he’d prefer I just follow my old rules.

That was telling.

And so, that day, I walked away from a potential relationship with a guy I really liked. It was hard. My heart disagreed with this decision. I was sad. And I felt shaky. My body wasn’t used to breaking that rule, and I was uncomfortable in my own skin. Plus, I wasn’t certain I’d handled the whole thing very well. (I probably didn’t. After all, I was practicing.)

But, here’s what I know for sure: By breaking that rule and having the courage to ask a perfectly reasonable question, I gained the assurance that I can do life differently—even when decades of ingrained rules, and my own emotions, and a person I like were telling me not to.

The saving of my life

Is it too extreme to say that this saved my life? I’m not trying to imply that, had I not learned to break some rules, I would have ended up with an axe murderer for a boyfriend. What I am saying is that, if I had ended up with an axe murderer, I might have politely stayed.

I do know this: my life—the part of me that is alive and vibrant and vital and in process—has absolutely been saved by this practice of rule breaking. The part of me that is me has been set free from the prison of oppression and silence.

My life—the part of me that is alive and vibrant and vital and in process—has absolutely been saved by this practice of rule breaking. The part of me that is me has been set free from the prison of oppression and silence.

Yes, the work has been hard and messy. And, yes, it’s very much still ongoing. But it’s been oh so very worth it.

I will probably always have to do more work than others to reset my default message of “Be different, but don’t differ.” But, these days, I’m working on following a new set of guidelines: “Be different. Be brave. Be honest. Be you.”

And from here on, I’ll be a rule breaker at heart.

Julie Rybarczyk is a freelance writer, fair-weather blogger, and empty-nester mama who’s living alone and liking it . She’s perpetually the chilliest person in Minneapolis—so most of the year you’ll find her under layers of wool, behind steaming cups of tea. Or on the socials at @shortsandlongs.

BY Julie Rybarczyk - May 21, 2019

Like what you see? Share Wit & Delight with a friend: 

Reading this was like reading my own, very recent story. I understand every single word you write and everything that’s hidden between the lines, and I totally needed to read this right now, struggling with those feelings of loss and sadness, missing him even though my every cell knows it’s better this way. Thank you for writing this and sharing it with us!

Teresa Maria | Outlandish Blog

Teresa, thank you for your note and for sharing where you’re at. I’m sending you love in the grief and loss. I sooooo get it. Keep taking good care of your beautiful self. xo

This story feels so much like mine, but instead of questioning a weeks old relationship, I decided to confront a three-year situation by finally standing up for myself and my needs.

It was…violent, to say the least. But I’m never going back to my passive, meek, agreeable self. Not when my own life and safety are on the line.

Thank you for writing this.

Oh Mykki. In your case, it truly was your life that was saved. How very courageous and difficult and painful to leave a three-year relationship, especially with violence involved. I am so sorry that was your reality, so inspired by your strength, and so glad you are safe and sound. Thank you for sharing your story. Keep taking good care of yourself. xo

“Be different. Be brave. Be honest. Be you.”

“Be Different, Be yourself”. Thank you for sharing this.

The article is exceptionally good and straightforward. This is precisely what I require.

I absolutely loved this story. Thank you so much for sharing. It sounds like you’ve been though a lot and have learned from it. Keep breaking the rules! You’re most certainly on the right track.

Thank you so much, Nikki. Here’s to all the beautiful gifts that come from breaking the rules. xo

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Should You Break the Rule?

Rules are sometimes wisely viewed as rules of thumb..

Posted July 25, 2021 | Reviewed by Jessica Schrader

• It is wise to follow the rules—most of the time.
• In some instances, clients broke the rules wisely and successfully.
• Rules are often viewed as a rule of thumb, but there may be a time to break the rules.

It’s wise to follow the rules ... usually.

But as readers of this blog know, I’m more a fan of the gray than of black and white. So here are some admittedly anomalous composite examples of my clients breaking the rule wisely and successfully. I change irrelevant details to protect my clients’ anonymity.

The rule: No crash diets

Someone who broke the rule

A client wanted to lose 20 pounds but felt he wouldn't be motivated to follow the standard advice: lose slowly, a pound a week. Rather, he wanted to crash-diet to lose the first 10; then his goal would feel more in sight.

He emailed me his daily calorie consumption and weight. He lost 10 pounds in two and a half weeks and then the other 10 in 10 more weeks. It’s been six months now, and he’s kept it off by adopting a diet in which he eats just 10 percent fewer calories than before he started dieting : for example, leaving two bites on the plate, choosing a lower-calorie entrée, eating one piece of bread instead of two, sharing a dessert, and yes, keeping his nemesis, ice cream, out of the house.

The rule: Manage positively, not by fear

(I change irrelevant details to protect my client's anonymity.)

A workgroup within BART, the Bay Area’s public mass transit system, was known for being unresponsive. The manager, who had been there for years, knew what strings to pull, and despite the workgroup's sloth, managed to hold onto her job—until she didn’t.

Finally, an employee, having waited three months for the division to provide essential other workgroups with essential information, marched into a senior director’s office with other victims of that workgroup’s sloth. A year and a lawsuit later, she was replaced, not fired, just “put where she can finish out her years without causing too much harm.” The new manager, in her “welcoming” talk to the workgroup's staff, put the fear of God in them: “I will take no more lazy sh*t from anyone. As soon as I see it, I’ll get your ass fired, just like your boss was.” Immediately, same day, no, same hour, everything changed.

The rule: The best way to get a job is to network

She hated networking. She was shy and, besides, felt it was cheapening: “It’s an acknowledgment of society’s too often bestowing jobs based on who you know more than on what you know.” But she tried networking, rehearsed when it failed, and tried again. And for all that swallowing and anxiety , she ended up with nothing more than lots of wasted time and “I feel my reputation was tarnished from having descended to that game.”

She was relieved when I said she’d be wise to confine her job search to signing up for alerts from the macro job sites like Indeed and LinkedIn and to regularly checking the job postings at her profession's websites. Then, to avoid wasted effort, she should apply only for openings where she'd likely be in the top tier of applicants. Each application should make the case for why she’s a fine fit, and she should prepare moderately for interviews but not so much that she'd be tight. Within a month, she got three interviews, and two months later (organizations’ hiring processes have elongated), she got a well-suited job offer.

The rule: Don't get angry

A wealthy client was trying to figure out the best charitable bang for the buck for a $250,000 donation. To help figure it out, he had a number of phone discussions with a colleague. He noticed, that with each phone call, the colleague was less enthusiastic, even in how he answered the phone. In the beginning, it was an enthusiastic "Hi!" but it had descended into a flat, “Oh, hi.”

My client asked his colleague why, and the response was, “Well, honestly, I’m getting tired of your changing your mind.” My client deliberately displayed anger : “Yes, in a phone call, we may agree on what to donate to, but when I got new information that makes me unhappy with that, of course, I changed my mind. As Longfellow wrote, 'A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.' If that frustrates you, that’s a problem for me. Get over it or I won’t discuss it with you anymore." The colleague apologized, the discussions continued productively, and they ended up excited about where the money would be donated.

The takeaway

Again, it's usually wise to follow established best practice. But rules are often more wisely viewed as rules of thumb. There is a time to break the rule, just like if you’re having a baby now , you might, on the way to the hospital or midwife birthing center, want to run a red light.

I read this aloud on YouTube.

Marty Nemko, Ph.D ., is a career and personal coach based in Oakland, California, and the author of 10 books.

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If you’re considering voting blue, this is who’s who, where are the women superheroes, dear men: women don’t wear makeup for you.

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What I Learned From Breaking the Rules at School

We’ve all broken a few rules from time to time, and of course, it’s human nature to break boundaries. It’s been proven from numerous surveys and studies that children who experience less freedom and whom are more creative are more likely to indeed break the rules. Undoubtedly, this is going to have an impact on behavior within educational institutions – especially those with heavy restrictions.

The first thing I learned is that the huge gap between students and staff is in fact, huge .

We are taught to not stand up for what we believe in, we are taught words such as ‘tattle-tailing’ imply that if we were to stand up for ourselves or something we either disagree with or are made uncomfortable with, then we are automatically in the wrong.

We must fear authority and authority are above us. They believe they have the right to strip us of our identities, to stop us from expressing ourselves as individuals. It’s as if originality does not exist in our education system, given that we are all looked at as one, and expected to all learn via the same methods despite our different abilities.

I learned that we supposedly attend a place of education where the color of your hair or the nail polish on your fingers is more important than how well a student is doing academically, or a teacher failing to teach a class at the expected standards or a student being harassed or bullied. Where instead of asking how you are doing mentally/emotionally or perhaps coping with the level of stress and anxiety that is thrown at us daily, they would rather question how your socks are a few inches above where expected or the flick of eyeliner on your eyelid along with the rest of your make-up you so happen to wear to feel more confident with yourself.

When I attend school with an unnatural color in my hair, or a piercing a few centimeters larger than expected – I do not do this for the purpose to break the rules. I do not  do this for the purpose of causing a commotion by being pulled out of my class over minor changes in my appearance. I do this because I do not want to submit to the unoriginality placed upon us, I do not want to be a sheep in this place of education with no individuality.

Now my experience may differ from most as I attended a public school in the U.K., and I do still understand the basic uniform policy in addition to other basic rules and what they stand for. How it teaches us to conform for our futures and how a uniform can keep discrimination to a minimum whilst also providing a sense of pride in belonging to a community.

However, I realized that as adolescents, we spend the majority of our young life at school. As adolescents, we are growing up and trying to figure ourselves out. Somehow, unfortunately, these both contradict with one another. By the time we reach adulthood, it is too late; we have already missed the opportunity to express ourselves as young individuals from being so heavily restricted. Because to experience being young at school is no longer an option.

At the age of 11, we are expected to suddenly begin using public transport and carry out numerous tasks independently. A t the age of 13, we are expected to know what we what to do for the rest of our lives and know the subjects we want to study for the future. A t the age of 15, we are expected to go under an enormous amount of pressure and tackle a few examinations  that determine how well we do in our life. F rom ages 11-17, we are expected to act like adults whilst simultaneously be treated like children.

But more importantly, I learned that challenging authority isn’t always a bad thing. It can actually be quite healthy, and there have been so many breakthroughs for justice everywhere by doing so.

So go ahead, maybe break a rule or two.

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Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence Essay

Romeo and Juliet is a famous play by the great playwright William Shakespeare. People who read the play or watched films that adopted its plot feel the touch of this tragic love story of Romeo and Juliet. With regards to this play, people hold different opinions and interpretations. Some feel sorry about their eventual death while others think that their final death reconciled their feuding families and united the two lovers.

This essay will argue that by breaking the rules, Romeo and Juliet finally attain success and independence. This argument stands on the fact that even though both Juliet and Romeo died through committing suicide, they attain success in the form of unity between the Montagues and the Capulets.

Their death helped their families go through a recognition stage. They unanimously throw away their feud after seeing the consequences it brought. At least there is hope for independence for future members of these two families.

Romeo and Juliet are star-crossed lovers who come from two feuding families, the Montague and Capulet, who live in Verona. Their families are in an endless conflict with each other. The two lovers ought not to show their love to each other because of this long standing feud. Both families disapprove of such an affair.

However, in spite of the feud between their families, Romeo and Juliet assert their independence but end up in a tragic predicament.

The Balcony scene is the first indication of Romeo and Juliet’s readiness to break social rules and have independent wills. Even though Juliet is well aware of her family’s hatred of the Montague, she falls in love with Romeo and goes ahead to organize for a marriage with him the next day. In the “balcony scene”, Juliet tells the following lines “O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?

Deny thy father and refuse thy name, Or if thou will not, be but sworn my love, And I will no longer be a Capulet” (Act 2, Scene 1, Lines 74-78). These lines reveal Juliet’s willingness to deny her own family name just to marry Romeo. She asks Romeo to deny his family name so that they can fall in love without the disapproval from their families.

When Juliet utters these lines, she stands in sharp contrast with her rigid family rules and wishes to be an independent person capable of pursuing her own love rather than staying in the trap of her family name. This shows that Juliet is already proving her ability to think independently. However, her wishes cannot be accomplished as things stand.

This is because of the feud between their families. It is this quest for independence that leads to the death of both Juliet and Romeo. Juliet meets her death when she takes a drug that would help her run away from marrying Paris. When she feigns death, Romeo thinks that she is indeed dead. He takes poison and kills himself. Upon realizing that Romeo is dead, she stabs herself and genuinely dies.

Romeo also shows his independent spirit by falling in love with a daughter of the Capulet. He is in love with Rosaline, a relative of the Capulet and Benvolio advises him to end the affair. He ends it but commits a bigger crime when he falls in love with Juliet, a real daughter of the Capulet. His readiness to break the rules and attend the ball at the Capulet portrays his quest for independence.

As the son of the Montague, Romeo is not welcome. However, he attends the ball and comes to the balcony of Juliet after her beauty attracts him. When Romeo attends the ball and follows Juliet to the balcony, he proves that just like Juliet, the social and family rules do not confine him. He is instead ready to pursue his own desires and make his own decisions about his own love affairs.

Romeo bravely makes himself known to Juliet and they agree to organize a secret marriage. The society cannot tolerate their love because their families are in a long held feud, and society knows the repercussions this marriage would yield. In spite of the definite family disapproval and numerous obstacles, Romeo and Juliet marry.

The bravery, independent spirit and defiance against their feuding families are what touch the audience the most. This hurrying into marriage shows how the two lovers yearn for freedom from the chains of the feud between their families. They even wish to drop their family names because they are curtailing their freedom of choice and association.

However, as it has already been mentioned in the previous part, the union of Romeo and Juliet will not only fail to win the blessings of their families, but will also face restrictions from them. In their quest to overcome this opposition from their families, they go through so many hardships including death. Juliet tries to run away from a marriage partner, Count Paris, just to marry Romeo.

She feigns death by taking a sleeping potion, and this brings a lot of trouble to them. Romeo on his part has to go to exile and almost kills himself while there. On coming back, Paris confronts him for a fight, and he kills Paris. He finally kills himself because he thinks Juliet is dead. Juliet also kills herself with Romeo’s dagger when she realizes that he is dead.

They go through all these hardships because of their yearning for freedom and independence. The two lovers refuse to surrender to the wills of their families, but instead they try every possible way to safeguard their love and fight against the rules.

The statement “From forth the fatal loins of these two foes, a pair of star-crossed lovers take their life” (Shakespeare, 2012, Prologue, Lines 5-8) shows that Romeo and Juliet prefer death to adhering to the rules and wills set by their feuding families.

Finally, the death of Romeo and Juliet puts an end to their love and is powerful enough to reconcile their feuding families. In another sense, the two lovers rise high above their mortal death and become perfectly united with each other spiritually.

In a world, they are not able to make their independent choices and be together based on their own desires, but their death enables them not to pay attention to social rules and assert the supremacy of their love over the feud and rules of their families. Furthermore, their death reminds their feuding families of the foolishness and irrationality of their long-held conflict. The two families reconcile at last.

Romeo and Juliet elevate themselves to heroes by violating the socially accepted norms and bravely fighting for their own independence and freedom. Thus, Romeo and Juliet attain success over their families despite the feud and stringent orders that guide the way the two families relate.

This success may seem to be irrelevant to them, but at least it makes sense to their families at the end. They die before accomplishing the independence and the freedom they searched for a long time. Their families, however, make peace with each other after realizing what their feud is capable of causing.

A conclusion can be comfortably drawn that by breaking the rigid rules regulating their behaviors, Romeo and Juliet finally attain their independence. They break loose from these rules, and they finally attain their freedom in their death. This freedom is not only theirs, but for all other family members.

Members of the two families who remain behind will enjoy this freedom that Romeo and Juliet looked for using all their tactics. Their families are now at peace with each other, and his means no restrictions will be there in dealing with members of the former enemy family.

Works Cited

Shakespeare, William. Romeo and Juliet , Ed. René Weis. London: Arden, 2012.

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IvyPanda. (2023, November 28). Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence. https://ivypanda.com/essays/breaking-the-rules-romeo-and-juliets-quest-for-independence-essay/

"Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence." IvyPanda , 28 Nov. 2023, ivypanda.com/essays/breaking-the-rules-romeo-and-juliets-quest-for-independence-essay/.

IvyPanda . (2023) 'Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence'. 28 November.

IvyPanda . 2023. "Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence." November 28, 2023. https://ivypanda.com/essays/breaking-the-rules-romeo-and-juliets-quest-for-independence-essay/.

1. IvyPanda . "Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence." November 28, 2023. https://ivypanda.com/essays/breaking-the-rules-romeo-and-juliets-quest-for-independence-essay/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Breaking the Rules: Romeo and Juliet’s Quest for Independence." November 28, 2023. https://ivypanda.com/essays/breaking-the-rules-romeo-and-juliets-quest-for-independence-essay/.

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Ethical ELA

for teachers by teachers

Breaking the Rules

Inspiration

Wendy Everard is a high school English teacher and writer living in central New York.  Her role as mother and teacher has given her plenty to write about since she started writing personal narrative and poetry, lifelong hobbies kicked into overdrive when she joined a summer institute with the Seven Valleys branch of the National Writing Project a few years ago and began mentoring student teachers.  She teaches in Cazenovia, New York.

In my Creative Writing class this semester, we listened to poet Ocean Vuong talk about diverging from known paths to forge routes into the Unknown, into new territory.  (See his video here .)  This got us thinking about some literary rule-breakers, and we looked at poetry by e.e. Cummings, Emily Dickinson, Lewis Carroll, and Gertrude Stein, to the delight of some of our young writers.

Today, I’d like to challenge you to embrace “breaking the rules” in some way with your poetry.  Feel free to break some rules of poetic structure, pushing back at an established form or some rules of grammar or poetry.  Or write about your relationship to the idea of “breaking the rules” or an experience you’ve had breaking some.

Below is a model poem by Creative Writing student, Aevlyn Wallace. Note: When you type your poem into the comment box, the spacing may not work.

Aevlyn’s Poem

Now, scroll to the comment section below to write your own poem. (This is a public space, so you may choose to use only your first name or initials depending on your privacy preferences.) Not ready? That’s okay. Read the poems already posted for more inspiration. Ponder your own throughout the day. Return later. And, if the prompt does not work for you, that is fine. All writing is welcome. Just write something. Also, please be sure to respond to at least three writers. Oh, and a note about drafting: Since we are writing in short bursts, we all understand (and even welcome) the typos and partial poems that remind us we are human and that writing is always becoming. If you’d like to invite other teachers to write with us, tell them to subscribe.

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A bit late to the party – but who doesn’t love breaking the rules! In truth though I love following rules, as long as they make sense to me. My favorite question as a teenager was “why?” – not out of disrespect but out of a desire to understand the logic behind things. Thankfully my mom understood and explained stuff 99% of the time.

Rules are meant to be broken And yet, Being out after 10:00 PM gives me anxiety, Drinking milk straight from the bottle is a secret thrill, Wearing a bold lip color is an act of rebellion, Going out to dinner alone gives me the chills.

But do I persist in my rule-breaking? You betcha!

Saba, The different “rules” you talk about breaking put a smile on my face. I’ve never been a fan of drinking straight from the bottle, but I know people who also get a thrill from it. Bold lip color as an act of rebellion, is more my style. thank you for sharing.

Wendy, Thank you for this fun prompt. Sorry, I am a day late, but time with family won out yesterday.

I am a rule follower However,  I’ve often heard Rules are meant to be broken But why I wonder??? Aren’t rules in place to keep us safe? Who made up the rules?? What happens if I break them?

I am a rule follower Until I just can’t follow any more Some rules are merely guidelines Don’t wear white after labor day Is that a rule, guideline, or something else opinion I don’t care, I’ll wear white when I dare

I am a rule follower????

DeAnna, I love the questions spread throughout! The example you brought up “don’t wear white after labor day” made me think about what else is really just made up! The rhyme in “I don’t care, I’ll wear white when I dare” leaves us with a sense that maybe you are, indeed, a rule breaker!

Thank you Wendy for giving me permission to break the rules. I’m currently reading Amanda Gorman’s “Call Us What We Carry”. I began reading the book for a book club event with my writing group. i remember discussing how she “breaks rules” (not our exact verbiage) with the forms and shapes of her poetry.

though i like the idea of breaking the rules i feel like i could only go so far my inner rule-follower lets me go right up to the edge without actually crossing the line

Donnetta, I can totally relate. There are very few actual rules I’ve broken in my life, some of them have mostly been guidelines and even breaking those were hard.

Wendy, thank you for this prompt. Breaking the rules can be fun and full of thrill. I like the spacing of Aevlyn’s poem. The change in spacing of poems like that typically catches my interest.

Teacher Dress Code

“On Fridays you can wear jeans.” Today is Monday. I’m in jeans — black, not denim. Nevertheless, jeans for me on Monday. Carefree.

Love this definition of jeans and how jeans always seems to imply blue color rather than fabric. Don’t “they” know we need the strength of denim to fortify our day?

Amber, I like to wear jeans on Fridays, we don’t have a rule about not wearing jeans the rest of the week, but if feels wrong when I do it. I not only wore jeans on a Monday, I wore holy jeans.

Thanks for this exciting prompt, Wendy! My response is inspired by and a riff off what Shelly Kay shared in her poem.

Rebel, resistor, revolutionary

“We say” and “they say” we are reforming education. I have heard this same refrain decade over decade.

“No child left behind” “Race to the top” “Common Core standards” “Every student succeeds”

The Nation’s Report Card says: “Largest decline…” “2022 reading scores lower…” couched in lots of wordy excuses.

On the global stage we score mediocre at best. The richest nation in the world.

“Rich” we may be in the ways financiers measure: GDP, “net worth.”

Yet, we rely upon standardized tests sit and git drill and kill

To measure our “success” in education. I ask “whose success?” Certainly not our students’.

So, I continue my crusade as a maverick, asking students things like: “What do YOU care about?” “Why do you think…?” “What would happen if…?” “How would you explain…?”

Although my efforts impact only a few at a time, my fervent hope is that you are also fighting for the future of our youth and our nation.

Charlene, I loved these inspirational lines and applaud your passion! Loved this stanza, especially: “ So, I continue my crusade as a maverick, asking students things like: “What do YOU care about?” “Why do you think…?” “What would happen if…?” “How would you explain…?”

Keep fighting the good fight! <3

Charlene, Great riff on Shelley’s poem. I love your title. You have clearly spelled out how “rich” money-wise is not what makes us truly rich. We are failing our students, and yes, rebellion, resisting, revolution are in our future.

sit and git drill and kill

Old and gray Loyal and true Sweet porch rocking An empty nest for two

Three on the road Off to college Graduations, proms Transcripts and ACTs

State tests, first car keys Push the curfew Out the window Late night whispers

First I love yous Too young to date Too young to drive Family vacations

Summer nights Off to school There you go Autumn leaves

First bicycle rides First ocean waves First of every kind Fresh pink face

The beginning

Ashley, it took me a second to realize that your poem is a reverse one: you began it with the end, and it can easily be read from “the beginning.” I would prefer it that way. The absence of punctuation helps creating the seamless flow of life’s milestones. I love all the “firsts.” Thank you for writing and sharing!

I’m glad it came through! I wanted it to be read from either direction 🙂 Thank you!

Ha! As soon as I got to the end, I read it again backward, then saw your note. Sweet! I love the “Push the curfew / Out the window / Late night whispers” – since we literally pushed ourselves in and out windows to break those curfews – ! You’ve captured a lot here, Ashley, beautifully remembered and recounted.

Ashely, I feel these words acutely! That first stanza was my favorite: “ Old and gray Loyal and true Sweet porch rocking An empty nest for two”

With one in college and the other on the receiving end of my driving lessons right now, that empty nest feels closer every day. Also loved the way you framed your poem and the “fresh pink face” that signaled a new beginning at the seeming end. <3

Ashley, another great way to break the rules. I love what you did here. Love “An empty nest for two”

I really marinated a long time about this prompt, but this incident on Friday kept niggling at my mind.

I’ve never really been good at following  all the rules. There are rules that make sense and those that don’t, and I’m old enough now that I only  pay attention to the ones  I want to or have to. 

On Friday,  another teacher asked  if two pre-service teachers  could observe one of my classes.  Sure! No problem! But we’ll be discussing an article, meant to be “provocative”  for the dual college credit part of my class.  “Cool!” they said, “Sounds fun!”

What they didn’t realize, is that I encourage my students to think for themselves and say what they really think– respectfully, of course, but honestly. The article was about  Native American Two-Spirits, or what is roughly translated to  gender fluid or gender neutral  in recent years. 

The article is badly written  with little attention to pronouns  and correct definitions of basic things  like “dress,” “gay,” and “lesbian.” The class, about a third of whom  are part of the LGBTQ+ community, ripped it, articulately, to shreds. 

One of the observers asked me if the “rules” about what could be  talked about in class were different  since it’s dual college credit.  “Not really,” I said, neglecting to mention our  LGBTQ History class down the hall,  “these are juniors and seniors and I encourage my students to  think independently.”  She blanched.  Good luck in public school, honey.  I guess I didn’t follow her rules.  Oops. 

Classrooms where students can have autonomy, speak their minds, and be safe doing so are so crucial. I wish I could sit in your classroom. I am sitting in awe of your classroom, and I hope my kids find teachers like you in their journeys.

Oi. And yet, this is exactly the kind of silencing many wish to see in the public schools (and are making happen). We are a nation divided when it comes to the public education experience. I applaud you for creating this space for young citizens to have honest examinations of our culture as well as to find their own identities within it. And I am fearful of any teachers not being fully educated to embrace that. I think “ripped it, articulately, to shreds.” is a line that could apply to “these are juniors and seniors and / I encourage my students to  / think independently.”  as well – ! : )

Cara, your last line dripped with irony — loved this narrative poem and the snapshot that it gave us of a moment in your classroom–and bravo for nurturing an open forum for discussion — your poem rang with pride in every stanza and painted a great picture. <3

Cara, I applaud you for continuing to teach your students to think for themselves. No teaching them what to think. Thank you for making a safe space for so many vulnerable students. 🙂

I would have loved to be a fly on the wall. Thanks for sharing this experience! I can *hear* you saying your last line “Oops.”

bird on a nest What keeps you sitting on the nest, sometimes facing out to the yard, sometimes towards the house? This morning you sat on the rim of the nest. Are the eggs hatching?

Some days a second bird sits on the branches several feet away from the house. Who is this second bird? A member of the family? A bird keeping watch?

How will we know when the eggs have hatched? Will the size of the hatchlings allow me to recognize them as your hatchlings? You’ve lived on our front porch for a few weeks now. It feels like you are a member of our family.

Will soft fluffy feathers cause us to recognize your offspring?

Your poem captures the curiosity and musings of someone watching birds. The playful dance of each line gives the poem a calming tone.

I can’t help but admit – I can’t remember writing a poem with so many questions. I’m so used to telling my students to use questions sparingly in their writing (the “rule”), that I don’t think about how it CAN be used. What meanderings the mind can make to converse with nature – so many beautiful connections and concerns to be explored in this one-sided conversation. Lovely, Jamie.

Jamie, I loved this beautiful spring imagery and the careful observation that spawned it. Lovely reflections and detail. 🙂

Wendy, when I read your prompt today about breaking rules, all I could think about was the word break–and the fact that today marks the end of my spring break! So instead of breaking rules–although technically this started out as a Haiku–it became a poem about breaking the break.

Break the Break At the break of break Songbirds trill, sun warms the now-spring air, breath flows in and out I suppress the urge to throw the alarm clock across the room Break broken

Kim, such a wonderful poem! I can share your excitement and “the urge to throw alarm clock across the room.” Hope you will have time to recharge for the final stretch of the school year. Thank you for beautiful words today!

Thank you, Kim, for such an uplifting poem! I can relate to your “urge to throw the alarm clock” enjoying the songbirds and warm sun during the break. Love the word play with “Break broken.”

Kim, I’m so glad you chose this topic. For how much I lament the breaking of the break, it’s never occurred to me to write about it. I really like your play on “break” throughout the poem. Good luck tomorrow! One day closer to the long break!

I like the way you look at the end of break as being broken. Rest assured that this teacher who’s break was two weeks ago, still has the urge to toss the alarm clock.

Great poem, Kim. My break was broken a week ago, so I hear you!

Kim, this made me laugh out loud! (We have one more day of break, then back to school Tuesday.). Tomorrow, this will be me and my daughter! XD

Thank you, Wendy, for hosting today and for wonderful mentor poems, including your student’s poem. My students get excited hearing that the rules can be broken, or violated. We discuss when and how it can be done. My take on today’s prompt is brief:

Break the Rules

Break the rules—    not because you don’t know better,       not because you don’t understand.

Break the rules on purpose—    to draw attention,      to make a statement,        to raise your voice.

Happy Easter to those who celebrate! 

You capture the beauty of advocacy and how sometimes breaking the rules is needed. The infinitive forms make it feel like a call to action.

Leilya, yes, good reasons for breaking the rules. It reminds me of how when we know the rules, like in writing for instance, we can break them. You have taken that notion a further step to important championing work.

Leilya, thank you so much for this call to resistance! A beautiful, poetic call to action.

I’m a rule-follower; no, I’m a hypocrite. Or, maybe, I’m a  rule-questioner rule-cynic rule-skeptic.

But, I’ll follow  your rules until  your rules compromise  mine or others’ well-being.

I’ll follow  your rules  until  your rules  obstruct my  voice.

Hi, Laura, I like your poem’s progression. The second and third stanzas clearly identify the points when the rules will be broken. It’s always helpful set up your own rules for breaking them. I like these lines: “ But, I’ll follow  your rules until  your rules compromise  mine or others’ well-being.”

Thank you for sharing!

I love that the the break in following rules when the rules “compromise (yours) or others’ well-being” or when your voice is obstructed.

Laura, I really like the changing tone of your poem, but your last stanza is a banger:

Laura, Thanks so much for this! Loved the creative wordplay in your first stanza: “ I’m a rule-follower; no, I’m a hypocrite. Or, maybe, I’m a  rule-questioner rule-cynic rule-skeptic.”

…and the way this poem ruminated on your relationship to rule-following, reaching an assertive conclusion at the end.

Laura, What a powerful poem you wrote.

This is how I too feel.

I need to “break the rules” and write this poem in my journal to get the format I wanted. I hope you can see the poem in the photo. I chose to not write in traditional lines across the page.

I love that your poem becomes a puzzle when the rules are broken. The mirror image of words and ideas creates a nice parallel—although a heartbreaking one. Thanks for sharing!

Hopefully, your hear will flip from sad to happy more often. I like the mirror Image created by a handwritten poem. Thank you!

CM, Very clever formatting. Love the color. Congratulations. When is the ETA?

I wish… it is departure time this morning. I was reflecting on last week with each day as excitement built for both my kids coming home on Friday. One left last night and the other this morning.

I wish it had been about arrival but it was written the right before departure.

This was great, and fun to read and puzzle over — how often are our feelings mixed like this, sadness and happiness entwined! This reminded me of seeing my oldest off to college in January. <3

Great prompt Wendy ~ I was looking forward to writing a more literary rule-breaking poem but this is what came out instead. Nothing groundbreaking here!

Letter to HIghlights Editor

I’ve learned to follow  all the rules— never Goofus always Gallant: always pleasant always nice, always please,  always thank you, always take the smaller slice, I’ve learned to shrug my shoulders, no worries, no matter,  to walk away with smile even though my heart’s  been shattered. I’ve learned to speak in a quiet voice, never sharp or cruel, always gentle  and respectful, to friends at home and school.

But Highlights never told me how many Goofuses I’d find, how many thoughtless people— power-hungry and unkind.

I think I’ll write the editor and share what I’ve found out— to make the the world a better place, WE’RE GOING TO HAVE TO SHOUT.

Ann, This. Was. Awesome! Loved that middle stanza that shifted things so well…I could just feel that shift building in the stanza before and was waiting for the “But”! Totally agree with your sentiments –too many Goofuses, for sure, in life — and with the need to SHOUT.

Ann! The meter for this was perfect – the voice and tone of it were brilliantly tongue-in-cheek. I really loved that first stanza, especially the repetition of always. Your poem is so “school-y” in the best School House Rock kind of way. That last couplet is absolute fire and absolutely true. Loved it! Thanks so much for writing today!

Oh, I remember Goofus and Gallant…I think so many of us (women, especially) were socialized in just this way. As I’ve gotten older, I’m learning that there are times to use your voice, to speak up loud, to NOT follow the rules. We can’t let the Goofuses of the world run roughshod over everything that’s good. Thank you for this take!

Ann, I, too, think you should write to that Highlights editor and give them your piece of mind. You so masterfully created your poem building a case for raising voice and breaking rules. The final two stanzas ending with “WE’RE GOING TO SHOUT” are strong and impactful.

Ann, You had me with your Goofus and Gallant reference! I loved Highlights as a kid! Maybe a class action suit about all the Goofuses out there. Hmm. While taking me down a fun lane of nostalgia, you also had a lot of extremely on point lines. It’s long, but this bit hit home particularly strongly: “ I’ve learned to shrug / my shoulders,  no worries, / no matter, / to walk away with smile / even though my heart’s / been shattered. / I’ve learned to speak / in a quiet voice, / never sharp or cruel, / always gentle / and respectful, / to friends at home / and school.” Thank you for sharing today!

The rules of the household I grew up in Were simple: Keep secrets Do not communicate Except through yelling And punishment Not good enoughs

Until it almost killed me

The anger consumed  Memories exhumed Perfection unattainable Burying it unsustainable I broke the rules Gave up the facade Cried puddles to my younger self Refused to apologize any longer For who I am

Nothing is black and white I am so many hues of gray

“I am so many hues of gray” – love this, so much. I know well the childhood nurturing of “keeping secrets” and “do not communicate” – it is so good to break these rules.

Heidi, One word: relatable. This struck a chord with me this week, especially — those old ghosts aren’t exorcised so easily, and “memories exhumed” occur more frequently than I’d like to see. Here’s to peace moving forward.

Yes. I know this. I feel this. Powerful poem. Thank you. You are not alone.

Heidi, wow, you have captured this so well. Your conclusion of being “so many hues of gray” is something I can relate to. Our family system motto of “Be cute at all costs” could have fit into the feelings I get from reading your poem. I love that you have “Cried puddles to (your) younger self” What a healing that came from that. I can see it in your strong poem conclusion.

Never have I cheered so much and so loudly for a rule breaker! It hurt to read about your “not good enough” and your unattainable perfection. And sorry that it took puddles..but I am cheering for your refusal to apologize for who you are and for your many hues of gray!

Heidi, your poem really resonated with me. I’m still on that healing journey and haven’t cried enough “puddles to my younger self.” And, 100% that most things are many hues of gray.

Wee brake rools two 

asshurt hour endepindents

& freedumb uv thot,

too uhvoyd beeing cuntrowled

& tolled wat tue due.

~Susan Ahlbrand

9 April 2023

love the way you played with spelling, especially “ asshurt hour endepindents”

Wow! What a refreshing and clever way to break the rules! Thanks.

Susan, I love the edgy thoughtfulness of this! Raising a glass to your beautiful and clever wordplay.

WOw! You broke those spelling rules, but came up with some doozies of phonetic excellence. I love asshurt, uhvoyd and cuntrowled.

Love your creativity in break the rules with spelling! I felt like I was reading my first graders sound spelling.

apso loot lee purrfikt!!!

Veri wittie!! Eye really in joyed ti 😀

Wendy, I loved this prompt! Though, once it came down to writing, I got nervous. It turns out, I am a rule-follower to my core. I was inspired by your student’s poem, but I realized today was not the day for rule-breaking in my mind. I thought I could break the rules today by following the rules of the tanka form 🙂 I’m looking forward to coming back to this prompt in the future!

Rules are an old friend guiding me in every setting, so this prompt is tough. But, if I write a tanka,  am I breaking today’s rule?

I am a rule follower, too – it took me years to get the courage to break a rule. I like the idea “rules are an old friend;” I think they can be very comforting (if you agree with them, lol).

Rachelle, it’s all good, as you were also invited to write about your relationship to the idea of “breaking the rules” — as a Type-A, first child, I can relate!

Hahaha! Yes, you are breaking the rule of breaking rules. Perfect!

As a fellow-rule follower most of the time, I loved your solution! And yes, yes you did!

Rachelle, I think I was a rule follower early in my career, too, but you chose one of my favorite forms to “rebel” with, so I think you’re forgiven. I love the gentle, almost conciliatory tone. Nicely done.

Rachelle, I love your Tanka about breaking the rules by really not breaking the rules. I too am a rule follower, so I also find it hard to break the rules in my poetry. However I’ve not followed the prompt twice so far this month. Is that breaking the rules??

Thanks for the permission to break rules and go whatever direction moves us. I’ve been thinking for sometime about the constraints of the rules I impose on myself. So the timing of your prompt is fitting.

r ubrics, rulers, and other measuring sticks

picking up pointers along the way i embrace the rules that others have made

so many right ways of being in the world why is it so easy to see only what’s wrong

and lose my way?

perhaps the lesson lies within awareness of whose rules I’m following

and wonder why am I chasing after something outside my reach

letting go of expectations, rules, and other barriers might create space

I love the title, Shelly, and how it works with your poem. The second line, “i embrace the rules that others have made” reminds me of the societal “measuring sticks” created to judge ourselves on. The space created at the end with “to be” is a valuable lesson. Thanks for sharing!

What a great title! I wasn’t expecting what came next but it resonated with me so deeply!

“letting go of expectations, rules, and other barriers might create space

to be”

Those lines say it all. And children need to hear that message early in a way.

I love your meditation here. I especially like these two lines, and the space – a pause, really – in between…so thought-provoking:

why is it so easy to see only what’s wrong and lose my way?

Shelly, loved this. Beautiful couplets with poignant single lines and sensitive sentiments. Loved:

“so many right ways of being in the world why is it so easy to see only what’s wrong and lose my way?”

Thanks for playing today!

Shelley, I like where you took this prompt today. This seems like a key that critical reading and viewing helps us and our students:

awareness of whose rules I’m following

Yes, here is to “Creating space / to be”

break the rules

? who gets to  make the rules? who gets to legislate make reforms litigate? who gets to  change the rules make exceptions turn a blind eye? who gets to question authority? ? who gets to live where? in which neighborhoods attend which schools? who gets to have good healthcare? who gets to live how? off of others monopolize wealth?  who gets access to decent jobs? who gets to live in poverty?  ? who gets to  be here? be a citizen?  who gets to determine borders? who gets to migrate? who gets to  invade their homeland destroy lives? who gets to  live freely?  ? who gets to decide that liberty means guns? ? who gets to  be together? married have children raise children decide to have children? who gets to  have sex? determine how they should have sex what is their sexuality their gender their lifestyle?  who gets to control their body?  ? who gets to practice their beliefs? ? who gets to have voice be heard speak up protest? ? throughout our history  time and time again in order to move us closer towards  these precious ideals of liberty and justice for all many have made good trouble which means, simply, many have broken rules  and yes we will continue to do so

Your poem makes me think that an important element of breaking the rules begins asking deep questions. And that breaking the rules is an intentional stance. Well done! I will be thinking about this in the days to come.

Maureen, what power in mixing up the order of words, and your use of question marks is remarkably effective. The bottom line for me and us: “ these precious ideals of liberty and justice for all many have made good trouble”

and continuing to do so, hopefully more and more people will get on board.

I love how this important question is set off by itself. No need for elaboration here:

? who gets to decide that liberty means guns? ?

Maureen, these are the questions! The repetition of question marks and “who gets to” really gets my blood boiling. The ending, brings more agency back to the reader and change-makers. I love the “made good trouble” tribute to John Lewis. Thanks for sharing.

We were on a similar wavelength today with our questions that explore the power dynamics that silence and control and determine and decide. Your verbs are deeply resonating with me!

Maureen, this was fierce!! Loved the barrage of rhetorical questions, the question marks that gave me pause, the repetition of the “who”s, and that assertive string of one-word lines at the end — terrific poem!

Wow, Maureen, a poem of such thought provoking questions – – who gets to decide all of these things, and who says they get to be the ones? I love thinking about the answers to these questions – – who says it has to be this way?? Great line of thinking!

Maureen, These questions are so important, but most have arbitrary, illogical answers, answers forged by those w/ power, answers that only get changed when we demand a different response. I remember Barbara Kingsolver talking about how no person is illegal. Humans simply are. They can’t be illegal. I love the random placement of question marks and the reference to “good trouble.”

Wendy! I LOVE this prompt and its invitation to play with and straight-up break the rules. Aevlyn’s poem is incredible!

A Poem Can’t Be Three Words

Yes . It . Can .

LOL. Bravo, Chea!

I . Love . It!

Grate…um…Great … Create

Yes it can!

Love, love, love this!

Chea, Perfect! I love how there are so many wonderful ways to break the rules that we are reading today. Yes to breaking arbitrary rules!

Chea— you win the prize!! Hurrah!

Haha…LOVED IT!

This feels like such a challenge to the idea of the poem. A small protest. 🙂

You go, girl!

Pachristgan

Nail three by three by three, blood drains from a tall X tree. Pain of a crown thorned, crowds of vultures scorned. vultures circle three time more, Father eagle cries- as he soars. Eagle tears fall on his son’s chest sacrificing, his son- laid to rest. Death to change the earth, Seven times a century -worth. Blood soaked soil, swallowed by a mountain. Blood cloaked oil, vanished by a fountain. Risen as the sun, The eagle, ghost, and the one. Stone rolled, stone rolled, Save souls, saved souls. Mercy granted from Cirrus whisks, bread crumbs served on silver discs. Wine served in blood drops, Passion of him surveyed on hilltops. X’s carried around necks, one line longer with a crimson speck. three times three times three, Iron spikes fleshing a Christmas tree. All around in love or hate, Returning? How long is the wait? Seven times seven centuries old, Mentioned seven times in the Dead Sea scrolls. A day of rabbits eating egg, Or rejoicing iron splitting a righteous leg. Bunny hops on holy ground, whipping, thrashings of thirty- nine sounds! Focus gone with capital gain, Center me, not his pain. Pagan rabbits be gone, Rejoice with hymnal song. Place eggs around Santa Clause, Celebrate to celebrate without cause.

Oh eagle 🦅 I see you in the sky, eagle tears cry, cry, cry.

Hit me now upon my chest, Renounce me, as I strive for the best.

There are no rules within my writes, resurrect your mighty might. so we all might fight the good fight, and see you in our heavenly sight.

know the meaning of spirit No dates it whispers Hear it?

Boxer, this is an interesting intermingling of Christian/Jewish/nature/education that tells different stories to different readers. Wearing my Christian hat, I see Holy Week. Wearing my teacher hat, I see a striving student. Whatever YOUR message, I say, I receive the message is that times change/people don’t/so we should be surprised that what goes around comes around, so listen carefully.

I am stirred by this Easter poem – drawn in by the rhyming, and mesmerized by your words. I enjoy the repetition of “ Stone rolled, stone rolled, Save souls, saved souls”, and I admire your provocative tone with

Focus gone with capital gain, Center me, not his pain.

I need to read this again and again, to absorb all that you have written.

Boxer, wow. What a powerful Easter poem. I love the allusions which are mixed around throughout the poem, broken, yet whole if we have ears to hear. I love the tears of the Eagle on his son’s chest, and this rendition of the trinity “ The eagle, ghost, and the one.”

Wow, wow. This was just gorgeous! The richness of the imagery, so many beautiful lines, too many to pick just one and isolating any one wouldn’t do the beauty of the whole justice. A fitting, wonderful tribute to this day. Thanks, Boxer. <3

Distraction

I find myself drifting of into every distracting thought only to find myself

back again with hands folded on my lap as I gaze into the sunrise

Thanks for this prompt, Wendy, on this Easter day.

Susan, you capture so many moments of my own experience. It’s happening more and more. Thank you for your beautiful words.

Susan, blessings to you today. You have captured those moments of distraction, and yet keep “every distracting thought” to yourself. I like the image of finding yourself again. It’s a very pleasant poem–visually and what is happening in your peaceful sitting.

Thank you, Susan, for understanding the conundrum I was in this morning when I thought I was ready to write. I ended up gazing into the sky!

I think it’s beautiful to just BE! Maybe it’s not a distraction but a need to just BE.

Susan, Loved this image — beautiful poem! Thank you, and Happy Easter!

Wondering if I can retype it and put in the correct formatting. A test.  I find myself drifting off into every distracting thought only to find myself

back again with hands folded on my lap as I gaze into the sunshine

Nope, didn’t work. Sorry.

Wendy, what a fun prompt. So many ways to break rules! It was hard to determine what to write. I was inspired by Mo Daley and her using e.e. cummings for inspiration, so I went to my favorite poem of his . Also, thank you to Jennifer for her inside out haikus and the image of Christ’s grave being turned inside out on most this amazing Easter.

—————————————

Most This Amazing Day (After e.e. cummings)

i thank You God for most this amazing day:for the singing worldly whistles of flyingfrees and the birr of boundless sunstar sinew;and for everything which is hope which is miracle which is Your yes (You who died and turned Your grave inside out today, and this is the Son’s rising;this is the Pax of promise and of rescue and re-creation: and You and you are welcome here)

Oh, no! It was Rachel S. who wrote the inside outside haikus. Sorry! How did that happen? I was thinking of Jennifer breaking grammar rules prompt this week too, which I believe are very valuable for students! Thank you, Wendy, for Aevlyn’s lovely mentor poem. It really gives permission to break up the rules.

What beautiful broken poetic play you have had here – the varied capitalization, the missing spaces and surprise punctuation – love this, Denise! Happy Easter!

Flyingfrees, boundless Sunstar sinew, singing worldly whistles. Wow. These words shine!

Denise, I absolutely loved the dearth of hard stops which gave this the rush of a prayer, a passionate exhalation of worshipful poetry. Beautiful! Thank you.

Denise…an Easter prayer bubbling over with joyful phrasings and rhythms…just fantastic. What glorious inspiration from cummings and other VerseLovers – Rachel’s spare lines were striking, indeed. I don’t know what part of your poem I love best: “ which is hope which is miracle which is Your yes” or “and You and you are welcome here” – honestly, ALL of it!!

Denise, I love all of this but especially the last line. It reminds me of two songs – – one for Easter, one for Christmas. Amy Grant Welcome To Our World for Christmas and Holy Spirit, you are Welcome Here for Easter. Great choice to use e.e. for inspiration!

And you asked about the ice cream? Oh, Denise. It was fabulous. We loved it!

Oooh I love what you did with it!!! Thank you for expanding on that line in this gorgeous poem. “Everything which is hope which is miracle which is your yes.”

Denise, Im a huge fan of e.e.cummings. It seems to me praying in an inside out way makes the prayer more intentional. I love the cadence of your poem. So many lovely phrases: “ whistles of flyingfrees” and “birr of boundless sunstar sinew” are two of my favorites. I thought of you often today as we toured Death Valley, which is why I’m a late arrival.

Thank you, Wendy, for this prompt. Somehow my mind went in a different rule-breaking direction, challenging time and reality.

Tomorrow was the first day of Perfect attendance all year with No one being sick or suspended or  Out with tennis or soccer or golf or track.

Students were alert and eager to learn. They were thoroughly engaged In our final novel of the year and They had mastered the use of commas.

By noon tomorrow, the basket was full Of completed work with every assignment turned in. There were no broken pencils or disassembled Pen parts to pick up. All trash was thrown away.

The copier hummed and sang as it copied Every handout for the week without stopping. There were paper towels in the teachers’ restroom, And the leak over the toilet was repaired.

I ate tomorrow’s lunch in total peace. There were no PLC’s or IEPs or 504 meetings. There was no lunch duty. There were no Parents to email. No makeup work to prepare.

Tomorrow afternoon was a dream. Students lit into literature like the bookiest of Book lovers. No one appeared to even own a phone. No one asked to go to the bathroom.

Students followed directions THE FIRST TIME. They all sensed the purpose of modern education. They hated to leave when the bell rang And begged to stay after school.

Tomorrow was the perfect day. Desks were perfectly aligned and papers were in alpha order. We teachers left ON TIME and went straight home To our dogs, our children, our clean houses, our paid bills.

Too bad tomorrow is another day.

Katrina—what a wonderful fantasy you have created here!

I ate tomorrow’s lunch in total peace.  As if … 🙂 (Speaking only for myself …) Kevin

Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow. I think we’re always wishing that this could actually happen. Loved the poem!

Katrina, masterful! What a great take on the rules of time. There were so many nods of my heads, snickers, and smiles as I read your perfect day description. Well done! A few of my favorites include:

They had mastered the use of commas.

Students lit into literature like the bookiest of Book lovers. 

They hated to leave when the bell rang And begged to stay after school.

Oh, what a smile you put on my face, and oh, to having a lunch period like that! (Has there ever been one before?)

This is a perfect fantasy! Imagine, a day without rules and procedures broken. My favorite line(s) is “ Students lit into literature like the bookiest of Book lovers.”

If only, if only…. I loved “tomorrow afternoon was a dream” and “Tomorrow was the perfect day”

And the ending brought us back to reality (sadly) “Too bad tomorrow is another day”

Clever Katrina!

I long for these perfect tomorrows in the land that never exists! LOL.

There were no broken pencils or disassembled Pen parts to pick up. All trash was thrown away.

I am still trying to figure out why they throw used tissues towards the trash, miss, and leave them on the floor NEXT to the trash can. So much to love and appreciate in your poem.

Katrina, Clever, clever, lol. Loved the wryness of this and the repeated beginnings — wishful thinking, indeed! And hope for “tomorrow” — here’s hoping that at least some of these could come true! XD

maybe the reason these standards don’t include the words poem or poetry is because poetry defies common sense standards, disrupts conventions, makes space in the margins for subversions

maybe the reason there’s no required poetry class for teachers training is because poetic thinking nurtures a way of being not so easily measured in CFAs or MAP tests or STARR or AR

maybe the reason why writing poems is relegated to April and not the core writing unit is because poets didn’t write the curriculum, because the poets on faculty weren’t invited to the revisioning meeting or textbook adoption vote

maybe we are the ones to redefine what counts as an education, that poetry is, in fact, the heart of knowing, that a poem is the very act of peace our world needs in classrooms and hallways and board meetings and libraries and locker rooms

if only — if only poems wrapped the lives of our schools

Sarah, I love all the “maybe” beginnings, and then the hopeful change to “if only” at the end. I like the punctuation and capitalization rule breaking, which shows an aspect of “ poetic thinking [that] nurtures a way of being” and can’t be measured.

So true that the poets are not invited everywhere they should be, but that would be an easy fix. I have hope through your poem that we will embrace the fact that “a poem is the very act of peace our world needs…” Beautifully said.

BOOM! Sarah. All of this. Spent most of my career undoing the conventional way English was supposed to be taught. The courses that best prepared me for teaching were always the creative writing ones…the workshops…the space to be free.

poetry defies common sense standards, disrupts conventions, makes space in the margins for subversions

… poetry is, in fact, the heart of knowing …

Yeah, this is the line that “got me,” too. Such a great moment, Sarah, in a wonderfully important (and, of course, well-crafted) poem.

Love the disruptive and subversive poem.

Yes, to all of this. I love “if only poems wrapped the lives of our schools.”

Thank you, Sarah, for being an advocate for poetry and for teachers! I love the humility in your repetition of the word “maybe.” In particular, “maybe we are the ones to redefine what counts as an education” is so poignant given the current distrust shown to educators by politicians and pundits and parents. This helps me feel purpose in what I do.

“ maybe we are the ones to redefine what counts” – !! Yes !!

Sarah, I couldn’t love this more. With our student seeming to be guideless and lacking heart, I feel “the heart of knowing” as you put it should be core to what we do. I love the various “maybe the reasons”s you give us, jabbing at some of the aspects of education that bog us down the most.

Great perspectives here and if the powers that be would listen to you, we would see a different outcome for our students and educators.

maybe we are the ones to redefine what counts as an education, that poetry is, in fact, the heart of knowing, that a poem is the very act of peace our world needs

Let this be tomorrow…

Sarah, loved this eloquent pondering/plea. My favorite parts:

“ maybe the reason why writing poems is relegated to April and not the core writing unit is because poets didn’t write the curriculum,”

“that poetry is, in fact, the heart of knowing, that a poem is the very act of peace our world needs in classrooms and hallways and board meetings and libraries and locker rooms”

Indeed.  Thanks for playing today. 🙂

Sarah, that whole first stanza really hits me hard. Exactly.

Omg, Sarah! What would it look like if poets wrote the curriculum? What if our curriculum was poetry? If standards were stanzas – little rooms that held the poetic heart of knowledge-building and meaning-making. Now, that is definitely the revolution we need. Inspiring as always, Sarah. And thank you for this radical space, that we may participate in this beating heart of knowing.

cummings broke the RULES, SO why can’t i? By Mo Daley 4/9/23

when the old puddle-wonderful world              whistles                           wee Just      in          spring

for the queer balloonman              jump-rope         and       hop-scotch                             bettyandisabel                                           and                                                          eddieandbill                                           come dancing, goat footed

spring piracies              luscious-mud whistles Spring is a little lame and Man! the balloon-      running wee and                          far              and marbles come              and it’s from the balloonman              from the world                             and it’s                              wee                                and                                  far                                    and                                      whistles

How did you get the spacing to work so well?

I am loving the way the form mirrors the moves of the wee an whistles. The fun floating around like the balloon.

I second Sarah’s comment! How did you get the spacing to work? Love the flow, pauses, and white space! Perfection!

Literally I just copied and pasted from my Word doc. Did you notice I used all the words in cummings’ poem and just rearranged them?

LOL. What!?! This is so good, Mo!

Mo—admiration all around. The spacing, the word play—all of it!

… old puddle-wonderful world

This immediately brought to my mind “puddle jumping days” with my boys. Wow. I was there, back in those joyous moments. Thank you for that gift of memory. Kevin

Mo, what a fun found treasure! Yes, indeed, this rule breaker inspired my poem today too, thanks to your treat here. I am loving e.e. cummings more and more as I get older! Breaking rules in poetry, like we did today and with Jennifer this week, are important for young writers, I think. I never liked cummings when I was growing up; i didn’t like the rule breaking.

I am awed by your spacing and layout…and the delightful, repetitious use of ‘wee’ – such a dear word!

Mo! I am envious of your words but also of your spacing. Mine dissolved and would have added so much. You capture so much fun and sprite-like spirit of Spring. I like the balloonman and the wee and far whistles.

I broke the rules with e.e. cummings too! Great minds!

Mo, Joyful, joyful — this poem radiated joy. “Luscious mud-whistles”! The “puddle-wonderful world”! The whistles, the “wee”s — this poem was a wonderful spring frolic — thank you!

Hi, Wendy, and thank you for allowing us to break some rules today. I love the format and message of Aevlyn’s poem. The spacing helps me imagine how she hesitates and pauses with thoughts while also allowing them a safe space.

I was planning to write a form-breaking poem but that wasn’t what my heart chose. I read a poem by Bob Raczka called “Some Reasons to Write a Poem” and it inspired my poem.

Some Reasons to Break the Rules

Because gun violence is protest-worthy and children should be safe in schools

Because women’s bodies are protest-worthy and men don’t control our choices

Because learning Black History is protest-worthy and stories might repeat themselves

Because reading banned books is protest-worthy and students seek knowledge and truth

Because diversity is protest-worthy and sameness is a bold assault

©Stacey L. Joy, April 9, 2023  

🐰✝️Happy Easter and Happy Resurrection Day to all who celebrate.

The because and because and because is perfect for all the reasons advocates have to persist — reminding everyone about the why and the worthiness of humanity! That last phrase “sameness is a bold assault”! Yes!

Hugs to you today, Stacey! Every couplet is critically important. I pumping my fist as I read. This is a poem to SHOUT OUT. It’s looking like we are going to be protesting hard and long…doggone it. Let’s keep on breaking the rules! Thank you for this inspiring poem today! Love, Susie

Stacey, beautiful! They are all “PROTEST-WORTHY” indeed. I love the simple follow ups you give and the “and” that begins each second line. The ands are so reasonable, true, and really irrefutable. It makes one wonder why we are having to protest.

A blessed Easter to you, too!

Stacey—because and because and because… yes.

Stacey, thank you for going with your heart! This powerful poem is what we need today! I’m with everyone else here: we need to shout this out from the rooftops!

After every couplet, I found my mind shouting Yes! This would make for a wonderful collaborative poem. I have so many other Because ideas in my head.

Bob Raczka may have influenced your writing, but I hear echoes of “ “Get in good trouble, necessary trouble, and redeem the soul of America” (John Lewis) in your “Because gun gun violence, women’s bodies, Black history, banned books, diversity is protest worthy.”

So many essential reasons to break the rules!

Stacey, Loved, loved these bold, strong sentiments, delivered in tight couplets. The ending was everything:

“ Because diversity is protest-worthy and sameness is a bold assault”

Yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes.

Happy Easter, Stacey! I enjoy the structure of your poem. All the reasons you name are worthy of breaking rules. You touch upon the crucial societal issues we face today. Thank you for writing so well!

So, I decided to break the ultimate rule, and go AI. I used the prompt “Write a poem that breaks the rules.” What’s on the left is AI’s poem–I responded on the right. This is kind of a mess and all over the place, but I suppose that’s OK since the prompt is about breaking the rules, right? If nothing else, I think it’s interesting/scary to see what AI came up with in just under 6 seconds.

Rules are meant to be broken, thought fragments spiral So here’s a poem that’s outspoken. ’round my brain

I’ll disregard meter and rhyme, humming roundabout,wondering And let my words flow free in time. where to find the way out?

No need for structure or form, Is it human, or is it I’ll let my thoughts ride the storm. Memorex?

No need to be conventional, Does AI have a heart? I’ll break the rules, it’s intentional. Since it has language,

I’ll ignore grammar and syntax, can it “think”? And let my creativity relax. Does poetry have a place

I’ll use slang and made-up words, in this automated world? And let my imagination be heard. Motherboard nurtures,

This poem may not be elegant or neat, circuitry waxes But it’s the expression that’s truly sweet. and wanes

So let’s break the rules and take a chance, poetic… And see where our words and thoughts advance maybe?.

Well, darn it…it messed up my formatting. Sorry this is a pain to read…but the italics are mine.

Terrifying! I confess, I ignored the AI lines (too freaked out by its performance, lol) and I read your italicized words line by line: these are a gorgeous poem, I think!

Julie, this is hilarious! Everything the bot said it was going to do did not do. Lots of good ideas for breaking the rules, but it isn’t able to break a rule to save its “life.”

I tried playing with AI for poetry writing last month for one of our Open Write prompts, and no matter what prompt I put it it couldn’t write a general poem that wasn’t this same sing-song rhythm and rhyme, so there’s that hope, I guess.

I love reading your responses to the AI lines.

The way the post reformatted your poem is actually quite interesting – your thoughts interspersed with the computer’s thoughts. This is actually quite a good commentary on computer generated text, almost as if to say that even a coherent poem performed by a computer relies on the actual work of a human being.

A very interesting way to approach this prompt. Your response is far more thought provoking than what the ghost in the machine “wrote.” 😀

Julie, loved the way this read! A cool, melding of AI and your voice, and the italics gave your voice a dreamy quality in addition to making the text, itself, stand out from the AI text — thanks for playing!

This is so wonderful! Thank you! My favorite rule-breaker is e.e. cummings. I love his poem “In Just (spring)”. My poem, based on his, is about summer.

in Just-   summer      when the world is sun-scrumptious the little children kick up the sand and roll into the waves   and seagulls come and sandpipers come running from the crashing tide   and it’s summer when the world is beach-beautiful   the seagulls cry far and wee   and children come dancing from their pails and sandcastles   and it’s summer when the world is

ocean-sparkling waves-dazzling sand-spectacular

people come from far and wee to watch the sunset-glorious.

I’m dying, Joanne! I just posted my poem above and started reading others’ poems. I used in just spring as my springboard, too! I love the second to last stanza and the images of the sandpipers running in from the waves.

Joanne, loved all of the beautiful, creative imagery and word mash-ups in this poem — made me crave the warm day ahead! Thank you!

What a joyous poem! If it were only truly more than one season of the year, we probably wouldn’t find it so great! Maybe the images you describe are the reasons we who live in snowy climes take vacations to warmer climes during the winter! We need to experience

“ocean-sparkling waves-dazzling sand-spectacular”

when it’s cold at home!

Thanks for the memories evoked in your poem, Joanne.

I love these images and can’t wait to see more ocean sparkling and sandpipers running from the crashing tide. I head for the beach tomorrow!

Joanne, wow, I love what you did with “In Just (spring)”

when the world is beach-beautiful

These show the depth and wealth of breaking the rules. Just poem-glorious, like that sunset.

Joanne – my soul craves summer more than ever after your sun-scrumptious verse!

Wendy, your poem prompt prompts me to combine prompts from this week about breaking grammar rules, reflecting on someone special, from our past, and writing poems our own way using poetic imagery. Here’s mine.

FINELY FOOLISH!

Break a rule!? I’d be a fool!

And a fool is what I’ve become. If the rules don’t help, they can stay on the shelf. Take a look.  Read a book Learn from others. Fears just smother.

Stand up straight, like an exclamation mark! Come on, folks.  Hark! Hark! Hark!

Let’s break a few rules even working in schools Let’s make some rules that will value another Let’s be kind, just like my mother

She was physically limited, Never thought she could walk. But oh, my goodness, she could talk! We couldn’t squeal, but we learned to squawk.

When the rules weren’t right, We were taught to fight.

We may be limited in the persons we reach, Let’s break some rules each day that we teach.

Anna, thanks for playing today! Love your message and your profound and thoughtful words about rule breaking. Favorites:

“ She was physically limited, Never thought she could walk. But oh, my goodness, she could talk! We couldn’t squeal, but we learned to squawk.”

“ We may be limited in the persons we reach, Let’s break some rules each day that we teach.”

Inspirational!

Hi, Anna – Yes, the mantra is so on-target, so earnest. I particularly love the final couplet…that call to action. Indeed! Teachers are powerful agents in this world…break those rules! I love your graphic as well. Hugs, Susie

I love the rhyme in your poem and the call to action at the end.

Hooray for breaking some rules. I like your mother here as role model and “ When the rules weren’t right, / We were taught to fight.” She was wise indeed.

Great attitude, Anna. Yes, one needs to creatively break the rules while teaching. I like “Stand up straight, like an exclamation mark!” the best.

Hello! Aevlyn, I love the idea of breaking the “rules” of writing poetry, or writing in general. As a teacher, I am so used to enforcing rules, this is a pleasant reminder that I need to remove some of the arbitrary barriers that limit creativity. Thank you!

Shaun, I LOVED how this invited me to read it different way with a different feel and message each time — thanks for the experience! <3

Thank you, Wendy. I just realized I addressed Aevlyn (the poet), instead of you. I wasn’t reading too closely during my first cup of coffee.

Shaun — This is soooo inventive and holds together the rule breaking and bending (wish I could stretch that word the way you did…:-0 ) the rules. So much fun to read and to embrace visually. You are so right about “arbitrary barriers.” Cool stuff! Susie

Shaun, that is a fun breaking of the rules poem. It’s beautiful visually and the words you chose are stunning.

Love what you said in your intro: “ I need to remove some of the arbitrary barriers that limit creativity.”

I love this idea!

What is the tech you used to create that?

Hello Denise, I used Canva to create the image. https://www.canva.com/

Painted nails blue Platform Converse sneakers Maroon coat with sequins Tulle skirts

Iris Apfel my hero IMG modelling contract at 97 She’s now 101 I’m almost 59…

Silver coated space cadet Handbags that look like Sliced cake, a pineapple, a toaster oven

Complimented in the Wegman’s parking lot Inside the gas station At Dunkin Donuts Sometimes I make people giggle

Walking in the organic grocery store Looks of disapproval Linen, cotton and birkenstocks Represent the uniform

A woman scowls at me in the checkout lane But I flash a 1000 Watt smile I’m breaking the unwritten rules With my sequins of activity

Jennifer, this was epic — as is Iris, who I didn’t know until you introduced me to her! Love your flouting of the rules and embracing of you depicted with all of this lively imagery — and loved your “100 Watt smile” and “sequins of activity.” Thanks for playing today!

Fun!!! I can see it all! Jennifer, this is a treat!

Complimented in the Wegman’s parking lot Inside the gas station At Dunkin Donuts Sometimes I make people giggle

“Sequins of activity” paints a picture, a la Iris Apfel. (I just met her in your poem.) I love your 1000 Watt smile and delight in breaking the rules here.

Jennifer – Rules connected to age are some of my least favorite rules of all. Life is too short not to be anyone but ourselves. When you’re next in the grocery, please imagine me reflecting that smile, nodding in approval, and asking if we can be friends. 🙂

I know for some this will turn me pariah, make me an outcast, a persona non grata

and for others I may be heralded as a rebel, an exciting, thrill-seeking, leather jacket wearing, motorcycle riding, Bad Boy of English Grammar

because I’d like you to know that, on occasion, I have been known to wantonly and quite egregiously split my  infinitives.

______________________________________________________

Wendy, thank you for this invitation to “break the rules” today!  (And thank you for sharing Aevlyn’s poem with us!)

Lol there are so many grammar rules I don’t care about, (oops, shh). This is one. I probably do it all the time 😀

LOL! Scott, you rebel! Loved this image, especially:

“ thrill-seeking, leather jacket wearing, motorcycle riding, Bad Boy of English Grammar”

Thank for the chuckle today!

Scott, I love that this is unapologetic! I am guilty, too! Who cares? Not us! 😂

wantonly and quite egregiously split my  infinitives.

Scott — You got me laughing again.. you “Bad Boy” you! And I loved the rule broken at the end. AHAHAHA! I do believe you can lean back and split all you want as most of the “grammarians in the sky” have dropped the rule. It still makes me wiggle a little when I split those pesky infinitives. FUN poem! Hugs, Susie

Scott! What fun! And you decided to split a perfectly apt infinitive! You “ Bad Boy of English Grammar”

Scott, how can you to intentionally split infinitives? Mine just happen 🙂 Thank you for your witty rule breaking!

Wendy, thank you for sharing this prompt and allowing us to read your student’s work as well.

I walked with my constituents, one sole at a time Caring for kids (innocent, breathing), over guns Peace for humans, not to carry a piece Listening to the broken hearts Breaking the patriarchy, misogyny Morally holding up my people, in ethical order

down us crushed –house our into broke you REBUILD WILL WE…as our broken souls are strong

Image with formatting:

Thank you for sharing the image. It’s amazing how a different form can totally change everything. All of this is perfection, especially how we can read the last stanza both ways. We are strong.

Stefani, I loved this even more with the powerful formatting — thanks so much for the inspirational words today!

Stefani, I’m glad you shared the image as it shows our cultural descent. The ambiguity in “ REBUILD WILL WE” leaves me questioning, leaves room for more of the same and pushing against the status Quo. You turn a phrase so well: “ Peace for humans, not to carry a piece” Let it be! Yet we know some bloated wingnut will walk into church today w/ his metal idol on his hip. The twisting of that one sentence makes me so angry.

Stefani, I love your powerful poem. It aches with the violence that’s tearing our hearts apart and our schools. The formatted picture is fantastic. Your end is riveting! Keep fighting!

I love what you do with the word order, leaving the reader to consider the different meanings depending upon their reading, like turning a gemstone at different angles and seeing different things in it. The juxtaposition of the protest in the first stanza with the upending of protest into insurrection in the 2nd is powerful.

Wow, Stefani, what a message, especially that backwards message, climbing back up to rebuild “as our broken souls are strong” I like the use of peace / piece.

Ooh! I love breaking poetry rules, so I played w/ something I started a few months ago. I’m inspired by Terrance Hayes transformation of the sonnet form and one-word sonnets. I made a word cloud to transform the sonnet a bit more. My original is below the slashed sonnet.

// Slashed Sonnet //

// boxed verse // line-limit curse // // common form // bards transform // // word hoard  // syllables stored // // fourteen count // only amount // // about love // characteristic of // // made new  // worded brew //

//words sublime // poem divine //

—Glenda Funk April 9, 2023

Sonnet 

boxed verse line-limit curse

common form  bards transform 

word hoard  syllables stored 

fourteen count  only amount 

about love  characteristic of 

made new  worded brew 

words sublime  poem divine 

—November 28, 2022

Glenda, your poem cloud is stunning. I’m so impressed with how you are using imagery to enhance your brilliant poetry. Thanks for sharing these two versions. I really appreciated the way your poem today sounds like a hip hop tune. The language literally creates a rhythmic beat that captures my poet’s heart. The slash lines effectively support your message, and I loved so many of your combinations such as “line-limit curse” and especially “ // word hoard  // syllables stored //” Brilliant poem!

That was so cool and fun to read!!!

Glenda, what I appreciate the most here is how each of the 3 versions have different interpretations from a reader’s perspective. I also love that you have taken something you drafted earlier and modified it for today. Thank you for sharing.

Glenda— it sort of bops along, doesn’t it! My favorite: word hoard/syllables stored. The word cloud is wonderful!

I love the slashed up edition so much!! So creative can rule breaking be!

Glenda, I loved each iteration of this! The word cloud was a work of art. Loved the rhymed couplets that both chafed against form and transformed it into a new “worded brew.” And further thanks for introducing me to Terrance Hayes. Very cool play!

Your word cloud is gorgeous! Hopefully, posted at your writing area. Just gorgeous! Love the rhymes and the short lines, so artful.

Glenda, what a beautiful slashed sonnet! I really like the look and sound of that–especially with that first phrase “boxed verse”. Did you make that up this morning? The word cloud is a lovely way to break up the rules of the sonnet even more. I would like to learn more about one-word sonnets.

Glenda, these rhyme-bursts are pure delight! They are a drumbeat, a heartbeat, a word-love dance. I am immediately envisioning this poem spoken by various voices with choreography. It’s just wonderful. And, Happy Easter! 🙂

Glenda, I love the rhythm of your poem – – the rhyme scheme and the way it sounds when read aloud are delightful. I also love that you made a word splash.

Glenda, I’ve read your poems and all the comments. The poet friends have noted all the greatness of your poetry today. This is just brilliant! Thank you for this gift!

Wendy, thank you so much for your compelling prompt today.

Dear Scorekeeper, You’re Breaking the Rules

numbers don’t lie they’re ugly trolls at a blind curve  accounting fatalities numbers tally death and taxes a world soon controlled by AI will all know numBers possess infinitive certainty

numBers bounce one in bounce one out

in an overheated auditorium my niece repeats that’s Not right numBers don’t lie gotta admit it hurts abit not knowing the why cuz numbers don’t lie

Barb Edler 9 April 2023

Barb, Powerful poem. Repetition of “numbers don’t lie” is a gut punch when I think about how we’re all reduced to numbers. Ugh. Brilliant to include your niece. Young people know and they’re not having it. “not knowing the why” is the greatest hurt in a world in which logic and empathy are treated as foreign concepts. The image of an “overheated auditorium” is stifling. So many layers here. Strong subtext.

Barb, for some reason I really want to be in this auditorium, experiencing this frustration with you. I think the “infinitive certainty” is a scary and powerful phrase here. Thank you for sharing.

Barb, Loved, loved your play here and the juxtaposition of the impersonal in the first stanza with the personal in the second. <3

“ numBers bounce one in bounce one out” I am mesmerized by these two lines. This is what rules do, yes – divide, separate, exclude, “other.” Great poem, Barb!

numBers don’t lie!

Oh, my goodness, of course, how infuriating this would be!

A haunting poem of injustice, Barb – I am seeing all kinds of images in my head, but most of all, I feel the mounting frustration. The mention of “scorekeeper” in the title and the lines bounce one in/bounce one out reminded me of a story my husband likes to tell about Michael Jordan. In a scrimmage, someone wasn’t keeping score right and Jordan walked off the court, saying, essentially, that keeping score correctly matters – it’s not “just” a scrimmage; it’s “serious.” But there’s so much more unnerving metaphor here in your verse about numbers, as in accounting fatalities, tallying death and taxes, and a world soon controlled by AI…again, haunting!

Barb, truth – and your repetition is so effective here. I love your use of cuz and abit and gotta…..driving home the fact that numbers don’t lie. And they won’t tomorrow morning, either, when I have to send a picture of both feet on the scale after a chocolate rabbit and lemon ice cream today…..I’ll sure wish they could at least stretch the truth……

Barb, your poem today delivers a strong message. The lines that stay with me are: “it hurts abit / not knowing the why / cuz numbers don’t lie.” Sadly, people and their lives are reduced to numbers. Thank you for your impactful words today!

Wendy, thanks for the opportunity to get a little un-rule-ee today! Love the prompt and I think it will serve as a great way to encourage my kids to think outside the box!

brake the rules

never had a problem with rule brea King

MLK said do it lovingly (he meant laws, but same thing, really)  

con Sequences will fol Low

M Brace them 2 … X cept RULES Always seem  2 b 

B     E          N               DING!

4 the RULERRSSS Knot the rulees, yoused as weapawns When they get un-rulee…

sew WATTS the sol u shun?

(screenshot included in case the formatting gets funky)

Dave, what you do with capitalization (King) and letter representation (Xcept) and wordplay (weapawns). Ain’t it the sad truth that the pawns must follow while the RULERSSS knot us all as they bend and break. This is brilliant!

Dave—so many rules broken with so much skill. It hurt my spelling bee heart! Best word–weapawns… Shades of meaning in every word breakage. Love this poem!

Dave, what a wonderfully un-rule-ee poem today. I especially like the commentary about the bending of the rules:

4 the RULERRSSS Knot the rulees,

Super message and such a fun poem to read.

Dave, loved all of the rule-breaking going on in here and the powerful message — and final question — that it underscored. Great wordplay (weapawns, un-rulee…). Thanks for playing today!

Dave – oh my gosh, where do I begin?? I think I must start with form: I am awed by the flow, the word-breaks, the way meaning changes with the shifts. It feels fun – it IS fun – but then, the message, the coding, the seriousness, the truths… BAM. I really have no other word but awe.

Wow, thanks!!! I really appreciate that!

I wrote a couple of inside out haikus for Easter!

Easter Morning Even though I’m grown, I still wake before the sun  eager to see my kids’ grins 

Son of God He turned the rules inside out and then when he died He turned the grave inside out

Rachel, I’m fascinated by your final image: “ He turned the grave inside out”. Cool idea to turn haikus inside out.

Oh, Rachel, what a great idea for breaking the rules today. Inside out haikus and the truth of Jesus turning rules and the grave inside out. Beautiful!

Rachel, I used your image of turning the grave inside out for my poem today.

Rachel, what a neat idea to write inside-out haikus, and what a great couple of poems celebrating Easter; loved them! <3

Rachel, I love these inside-out haikus. I, too, still give Easter surprises to my grown children and certainly to my little granddaughters. And how perfectly you capture Christ’s overturning death with the Resurrection, in so few words! Beautiful craftsmanship – a pair of diamonds, these poems.

Beautiful haikus, Rachel! The inside out form works so well with the inside out messages in the poems. Thank you!

Wendy, 2nd day of (mentally) returning to CNY (yesterday with Great Northern Mall) & today with an invitation to break rules (so much fun, thank you). The 315 is on my mind because I’ve been SNAFU this week…smashed car. Insurance. Home construction. Ramadan. Easter Bunnies. Random House nose hairs. Loved Aevlyn’s poem and know, full well, word-play is the way to do with young writers. Until they see the art in it all, they’ll unlike understand poetry’s purpose.

It Could of Been Price Chopper, but Wasn’t ~b.r. crandall

This, I know  because we’re (embraced)  kissing and snow is rising from the  mud.

are standing we 

in a channel marked with halls (remotely controlled by mom). these towns are so  small when i

return bottles  to Wegmans & run into you.

Began, that’s where it (fictional)

Bryan, sure perfection! I love the way these words weave together to show the relationship. The imagery of the snow rising from mud and the kissing embraced is vivid and compelling. I had to laugh at the side note: (remotely controlled by mom). Fantastic piece!

Bryan, there’s something about reversals and Easter and finding beginnings in ends that lands so perfectly in your poem. I love the way your brain thinks – breaking rules and writing forwards and backwards and getting it all in the in-between. I feel the Cummingsness of this.

Bryan, here’s hoping next week is better (can’t get worse, right?). Loved the funky, playful imagery here that made this so memorable and fun to read…snow rising from mud…a channel marked with halls…cool imagery, and a sweet ending.

Bryan, what a magician you are with words. “snow / is rising / from the / mud” is a great phrase.

Wendy—the poets you studied are some of my favorites, and so is this prompt. Thank you for the opportunity to think about all the rules I have broken—and those I will probably break in the future!

Breaking  the Rules

Rules were so easily broken when I was young. There were so many norms to negate. I just analyzed the opportunities and picked the ones that looked like fun.

I pierced my ears. I buried my bras. I abbreviated my skirts. I went out with inappropriate boys. I drank Boones Farm and paid with hangovers. I dropped out of —and into—and out of college. Dismaying my parents  was so easily accomplished. I didn’t even need to get a tattoo.

Today our vanilla values are bedraggled, tired, out of fashion. What is left to fight against? Rebellion is hard to do safely when opportunities for disruption  are dismantled. It is hard to flout fog.

Being a teen is tough.

Gayle Sands 4/9/23

“I abbreviated my skirts” and “our vanilla values” – masterful lines there 🙂

Gayle, I love how you open your poem with the narrative about what you chose to rebel against and then showed the ways. Your final stanza says it all, and I am especially moved by “ It is hard to flout fog.” Powerful final punch, and I agree that it is tough to be a teen.

“It’s hard to flout fog” has to be one of the best lines ever!

Gayle, this was great! So many sparkling, imagistic gems in here, and I agree 100% that:

“ It is hard to flout fog.”

…with our “vanilla values.”

Lovely sounds and imagery! Thank you!

Oooh, that line “It is hard to flout fog” – excellent! I enjoyed your list of rule-breaking…we are definitely peers, lol. I remember so well the need to “abbreviate my skirt” – love that language of yours!

Gayle, wow, some powerful thoughts and questions here.

our vanilla values are bedraggled, tired, out of fashion. What is left to fight against?

I’m hoping like the young lawmakers in Tennessee have rallied young people that good trouble will be fashionable and this won’t be true for long: 

Rebellion is hard to do safely when opportunities for disruption  are dismantled.

Gayle, those opening lines are the truth – rules WERE easier to break when we were younger. There were many. We heard. We just didn’t always listen… and oh, this line: “dismaying my parents was so easily accomplished.” So true again – as is the haunting last stanza. Being a teen is tough and there really is so much fog. I can’t help connecting this to Harry Potter and the dementors… that sense of being enveloped in the overwhelming, cold fog of despair. So many of young people are suffering so.

Wendy, thank you for the invitation to break rules. I’m a P.K. (Preacher’s Kid), so I grew up with the notorious reputation of breaking every rule there is to break. Naturally, I love your prompt and gravitate to anyone who hands me a rule-breaking challenge. Now I’m not bragging or anything, but when it comes to rules, I know from my life’s experience all the best ones to break. Not curfews, not punctuation, not physical boundaries. Nope. Dieting rules are the ones to break, so I’m going to be guilty as charged today. Thank you for letting me go ahead and make my confession early in the day – for hosting us today and for investing in us as writers. I especially appreciate your commitment to writing on this Easter Sunday. Happy Easter, everyone!

Living with Grater Purpose

optavia rules say there’s no eating ice cream (i sho’ ain’t liss’nin)

i might gain ten pounds who cares? it’s easter sunday it’s lemon. homemade. 

special recipe made with three ingredients ~ sugar, whipping cream

and meyer lemons fran haley’s shared recipe from a march blog post

today’s about life~ churn a zesty slice of life awaken senses!

glorious easter calls for celebrating life with grater purpose 

You can find the recipe in this post: https://litbitsandpieces.com/2023/03/26/zest/

Mmmm yum, sounds so good “zesty slice of life” yes, please. Happy Easter!

Kim, I like the way you purpose the word “grater”. Yes, it that ice cream, and thanks so much for sharing the recipe!

Kim, These holiday rule-breaking moments get me every time. They send me down the slippery slope. Still, the lemon dish sounds like a good reason to eat all the things. I love the parenthetical thought: ( i sho’ ain’t liss’nin). I’ll be breaking rules too in nature’s church and no Easter brunch. Have a blessed Easter.

Kim, well, now I’m on the hunt for meyer lemons so I can make this zesty concoction! It sounds delicious – your words made it so (and of course, whipping cream and sugar). I feel as if you’ve granted me permission to optavia rule the day! An Easter surprise!

Kim, Im an expert at breaking dirt rules, but holidays are an invitation to eat the lemons in a variety of ways. Do good! So, like you “( i sho’ ain’t liss’nin). Love that vernacular. Enjoy all the feasts of the day: the choir chorus, the community, the culinary delights. Happy Easter.

Kim, thanks so much for the “sinful” recipe on this Easter Sunday (can’t wait to try it — and thanks to Fran!). Love your series of haiku and the zesty abandon with which you invite us to live today without counting calories (they don’t count anyway on holidays, right??).

lol “with grater purpose” ! Happy Easter, Kim! My goodness, this lemon ice cream sounds absolutely divine. As were your haikus!

Kim, enjoy that zesty lemon ice cream. Will you let us know how it turned out? I do have the recipe, but I haven’t tried it yet. I’ll wait for a really warm day with company, so I don’t have to over eat it!

And I love the idea of breaking eating rules! “churn a zesty slice of life” is such a sweet shoutout to Fran’s blog post.

Kim!! I love the flavor of this poem!! Not just for the lemon ice cream (pure divine, ain’t it?) but because of the voice, and – how many ways can I say it anew?! – your unmatched haiku prowess. Grater purpose-! LOVE THAT. It is absolutely perfect for the moment of breaking rules to savor some zest of life. Which is, after all, necessary. Plus: That ice cream is worth it! Oh, how you and your poem have added exponential joy to my day – thank you for the gift of it <3

Happy Easter, Kim! I love your poem with the broken rules. My favorite lines are: “today’s about life- churn a zesty slice of life awaken sense!”

Life is worth celebrating on this “glorious” day.

Wendy – I’ve loved these “rule-breaker” poets for the greater part of my life. I hear cummings’s lines singing in my head even as I write. Aevlyn’s poem echoes that same song, and it is powerful (I say my tell/I tell my say). This is just a tiny Easter non-haiku… thank you for all your creative energy, Screaming Chainsaw Chick! <3

Easter Unhaikued

O for the morning of forever unaching total unbreaking 

O for the mourning breaking

Tiny and powerful!! Love the title, love the ending play on words, the “mourning breaking,” as this Easter morning breaks. Have a beautiful Easter!

The un-Haiku is just striking, the way you changed morning to mourning, a morning breaking, the breaking spirit of mourning, and the unbreaking right in the middle as lines go. I love these short forms for their power – like poetry concentrate. Yours captures the essence of the day and still breaks the rules, which is the rule. And you’re helping me break rules today, too – – it’s in the freezer now.

Sometimes rules MUST be broken…what’s in your freezer is SO. WORTH. IT! Thanks for the wonderfully fun shout-out today <3

Fran, I love the sound of your poem. I can hear the breaking, and the forever mourning and unaching. Powerful message for today.

Happy Easter, Fran! I love the hymn-like tone of your poem. Excellent title and rhyme.

Fran, this was just lovely! Those last two lines broke my heart a little: a beautiful Easter ode (and your thank you made me lol!).

Oh, sweet “Easter Unhaikued,” Fran. I love the morning/mourning and the unbreaking and breaking.

“Oh, for the morning / of forever unaching” – Yes, what a thought.

Thank you, Wendy, for letting us ‘break out’ today! I kept thinking of the phrase, “I break the rules every day,” and jumbling the words for different meaning and effect, kind of like a slot machine spinner, thus my contribution for today. A handmade spinner wheel was as close as I could get. Sunday funday!

Cool. I love the idea of a word spinner. Kevin

Awesome, Denise! So creative!

Denise—I want one of those spinners! It is beautiful AND expressive!

Yes, indeed, it’s Sunday funday! I like the spinner. Your creative poem this morning is playful and original. Thank you, Denise! 😊

Denise, I’ve needed this all my life. I need it to be like a wooden coin that I can carry in my pocket to remind me of who I am. A rule-breaker. Your creative way of thinking here is just right on point with the flair of writing in different ways, PLUS ….the font seems a little 1970s-ish, and so already I’m spinning with my hippie soul, smiling at the possibilities of all the rules I can break today.

In Kentucky, I required students to turn in one poem that was not the normal-text-to-page brand. Poems like yours, Denise, arrived. My favorite was a picnic basket of poems (many written on napkins) that a student created for me to carry to parks. Brilliance. Happy Sunday. Bawk Bawk. I hope the Cadbury Easter Egg are good to you.

Neat! Thanks for playing, Denise, in such a creative way! Happy Sunday!

Oh, what a beautiful piece of artwork! Sunday funday, yes! That is a great message, especially at my age!

Wendy, thank you for the prompt encouraging us to break rules! Your student’s poem is wonderful. I love the last two lines and rearrangement of words. Her subject is totally relatable. Today, my mind went to a poem in Kwame Alexander’s Crossover entitled “Dear Jordan” where the Josh writes an apology note to his brother. I have attached what it looks like in comments. But when I read it, I think it reads across like normal but also reads correct up and down both columns, so I tried to do that as well. I chose to write a love poem. Gush, ew 😜🥰 pic attached so the formatting would work.

“Dear Jordan” from Crossover

Awesome – one of the best poems from Crossover. Yours turned out great. Maybe I’ll try one one day. I love the spicy gumbo sentiment. Thank you!

Angie, I love that your mind went to Kwame and the directionality of print and how it can work in so many ways. I recently bought a garden tile of the oldest Latin palindrome found at Pompeii, the Sator Square, that my feeble brain is still trying to absorb. Words and directions like these are spellbinding to me, the way that language and its visual effects and meanings interact to bring us surprises and mind-blowing forms. You rock!

I really love the 2 column poem and the opportunity that you afford readers to read it differently and how unique and interrelated poems emerge, each deepening the meaning of the other. “Without u food like gumbo just be basic” is so good! And so is “I am less with no spice with no roux not right”!

Angie loved, loved this! Loved how reading it across and down was such a different experience, and loved the imagery within it…the yellow without blue…the gumbo with no roux…playful and fun to read.

Oh, Angie, precious love poem with sweet rhymes and joy, but sadness when he “ain’t in view.” I like your playful use and misuse of formatting, grammar and u.

Wendy, I appreciate the opportunity to break a few rules or follow the rule-breakers themselves. I leaned into EE Cummings this morning for further inspiration. What a great prompt!

some Scotus men who preside in purchased seats are unsurprising with their predetermined choices (also, with the GOP’s christian base rulings, backward whitewashed unamerican) they acknowledge Hitler and BefordForrest both dead, are unusually focused on so few things— currently one still hears  contented fingering for the might it be NRA?  mayhaps. While lifeappointed rulings arrogantly handle “scandal” of bannedbooks and reproductiverights …the Scotus men have no concern, beyond Scotus if occasionally in their laws of  whitenotblack and privilegeness, the heart leaks like an undertaker’s first act

*written in the form of Cummings’ the Cambridge ladies who live in furnished souls

ripped from the headlines …

Cummings would definitely approve of your poem. I particularly like the way you make it your own with some words put together and “mayhaps”. The words put together, for me, sounds like the way these people think of those subjects, like in a belittling nature. And “like an undertaker’s first act” – very powerful.

Jennifer, Yes, indeed, you have spoken truth to power in this poem. We should have believed Anita Hill. “preside in purchased seats,” “predetermined choices,” “whitewashed American,” are the phrases that hone in on the problem for me. Excellent allusion to Hitler and Bedford Forest, and don’t forget Amy Covid Barrett. She’s as bought as Clarence Thomas. Four of those so-called conservatives are among the most horrible people walking the earth.

Jennifer, I love the style of e.e. cummings, and I love what you’ve done here today in modeling one of his poems with a present-day event. The whitenotblack and privilegeness, heart leaking like an undertaker’s first act is such rich imagery. Purchased seats. You have left no stone unturned in this one today – the predetermined choices and agenda of politicians is as real as it gets.

Jennifer, what a powerful poem. You’re speaking to my disbelief in this poem. I absolutely love your final line: “ heart leaks like an undertaker’s first act”.

I really like the words that you come up with and how they increase in frequency over the course of the poem, intimating the increasing intensity of how we’re being separated from our rights. This is very moment defining.

Jennifer, e.e.cummings is a perfect model for breaking the rules. Too bad the grifting scotus has compromised their ethics so much that they’ll sell our rights for a ride on a yacht and zero outed loans. “purchased seats,” “predetermined choices,” “whitenotblack and privilegness”—all of this. The allusions to Hitler and Forest Lawn are spot on.

Jennifer, loved this sonnet! Timely, and, indeed, I think that cummings would love your form and wordplay. Powerful sentiments, memorable lines.

Jennifer, wow. There are so many amazing rule-breaking gems here. The coined compound words are powerful: bannedbooks, reproductiverights, and lifeappointed (drats).

And this, I likfe the lowercases used for christian and unamerican:

(also, with the GOP’s christian base rulings, backward whitewashed unamerican)

the / heart leaks like an undertaker’s first act

Well done using e.e. cummings as a mentor. I enjoyed reading his poem here. I used a cummings poem today too.

Achoo! blew the haik – u God bless you – here is a tiss – ue Clean up these broken – rules

Kevin, so cool and purposeful. Can you share what digital tool you used for this and about how long it took? Thank you for creating with/for us today.

Hi Stefani I used Keynote and made the words (snot flying from the sneeze) into their own text boxes so I could animate them. You could do the same in Powerpoint or Google Slides.

What’s nice about Keynote is the export as animated gif … I am not sure you can do that with Slides.

Sheer brilliance! And I agree with Stefani, what tool did you use? I didn’t even know Gifs would load and play here. I love this poem. I imagine it in a poetry book for children.

🤧Achoo! So cute!

Very cool visual effects to enhance the lines — thanks, Kevin, for giving us our inaugural poem today! Happy Weekend!

Kevin, I love the animated haiku! So fun! and “Achoo! blew the haiku” is so fun to say. “blew” is the perfect verb in that line.

Sorry, everyone — I have no idea what happened there and why there is a huge arrow pointing left — it was a link to the gif, now loaded below

The GIF is so cool – “clean up these broken rules” haha personification at its finest! Nice job.

Kevin, I adore what you’ve done with Haiku rule-breaking. It’s so clever and creative, I wish I’d thought of this myself. You inspire me to get on the Canva and Gif poetry wagon and do some visual images of poems. It’s so fun to see all the possibilities of technology, especially with a creative brain like yours pushing the buttons.

Gesundheit, Kevin. I seem to be allergic to #verselove, too.

Dishing out discipline and consequences for breaking the rules

24 Jan Dishing out discipline and consequences for breaking the rules

This week’s blog will follow on from the last topic of self-discipline but focus more on the actual discipline and consequences dished out for breaking the rules.

“Noo” I hear you cry! Rules are meant for breaking TeeJay. We don’t like rules. Rules are for wimps and people who don’t know how to have a good time! I’m chuckling as I write this because, as a youngster, as a teenager, or any age for that matter, there will always be sets of rules that you don’t agree with – but that you still should abide by.

“Effective discipline is based on loving guidance.” Peggy O’Mara

Playing the rules of the game.

Rules are made for a reason and that reason is in your best interests. Rules aren’t purposely made to be annoying, boring or to prevent you from doing something. Even if you feel this way about a set of rules, they were still created to guide and help you, to keep you safe and to set you on the right track.

Picture a ‘keep out’ or ‘no trespassing’ sign clinging to a high fence that marks the perimeter of an old derelict property. The place looks scary, possibly haunted (if you believe in that sort of thing) and you might be curious to take a peek on the other side of the fence. But those measures have been put in place for safety purposes. 

The building might contain asbestos (a toxic substance contained within the structure of old building walls and ceilings) and be likely to crumble, or include dangerous materials, sharp pipework and basically anything that could cause serious injury. I know it’s tempting to venture in – temptation has a strong lure to adults as well as teens – but it is an unsafe environment and the rules are in place to protect you from getting hurt.

Rules indicate what’s right and what’s wrong

Rules are created for a number of different reasons. They could be the laws of the land set to maintain order, respect and equality. To avoid discrimination and to discipline bad behaviour as a way of reform. Rules help to protect people, the countryside and wildlife, help to preserve heritage, customs and history, and even enable inventions for the future. 

Some laws ensure morality by creating boundaries for healthy, safe relationships between family and friends, education, employment, sport and social circumstances. 

Without rules people would do anything without a care for anyone or anything and there would be chaos. It wouldn’t even be organised chaos!

Consequences need to be appropriate, proportionate and painful

If rules are broken there are consequences as a result of the poor actions or behaviours that have taken place. Consequences should be appropriate, proportionate and painful in order for you to learn from the mistakes made and to understand what the impact of breaking the rules means.

I’m not talking about a physically painful consequence like a punch in the face or no food for two days. That would just be hurtful, vicious and completely unnecessary. I’m referring to consequences that are in place to deter the rule-breaker from repeating their actions and to guide them to making better choices should they face the same situation again.

• Learn a valuable lesson
• Modify behaviour
• Develop new positive behaviours
• Gain respect
• Understand responsibility

There are so many positives that can come from rules and consequences because you gain an appreciation for why different rules are needed in different circumstances. You will benefit from any support offered to become phenomenal in the future because you have learnt from the experience. And you will understand the rules for the future – for when you need to implement rules yourself with your own children, or in your career. The rules of the house are just as important as the rules of the land and morality. Do your chores and be kind to your siblings ☺ Oh and for the parents reading, please think of something more creative than taking your child’s phone away or switching off the internet for every consequence! 

Remember, dishing out discipline and consequences for breaking the rules needs to be appropriate, proportionate and painful in order for it to create change.

“Discipline is helping a child solve a problem. Punishment is making a child suffer for having a problem. To raise problem solvers, focus on solution not retribution.” L.R. Knost

What if your own rules were broken?

What would you do if a friend hurt you by spreading rumours or your partner cheated on you? It’s important to think about your own rules and the standards and values by which you live. The boundaries you choose to create must be firm and followed. If not, then you will be seen as someone who makes hollow threats and doesn’t carry through the consequences. In the eyes of the other person you have given them permission to be hurtful to you in some way by breaking your rules. 

Remember this…if you get rewarded for bad behaviour by having no appropriate, proportionate or painful consequences then this becomes conditioned in your thoughts and behaviour. In turn, this becomes a habit, which is a dangerous place to be in – for you and the person behaving inappropriately. 

“The best leaders are gentle. In our culture, we have been misled to believe that the tougher we are, the more respect we will gain, but that is simply not true. What we gain by being tough is fear, and fear is not respect. Respect is gained by giving it away.” Rebecca Eanes

What would be your discipline and consequences.

If someone you thought was a friend was saying bad and untruthful things behind your back, would you let them get away with it? If you choose to do nothing, what you are actually saying is ‘it’s OK to lie about me, please go ahead and lie some more!’ 

I’m not saying you need to physically reprimand this so-called friend, but they need to understand the impact of their deception. It may be that you end your friendship, report them to a teacher or stand up to them and correct them in front of the whole class. Your rules, your choice, but you remain the one in control and the one who maintains respect, integrity and value.

“Boundaries and discipline, when offered non-punitively and in the context of empathy and respect, are gifts we should feel proud of and one of the highest forms of love.” Janet Lansbury

Choose the life you want to lead.

Rules are in place for good reason. When you view them in a positive light for the benefits of health, safety, compassion, responsibility and all the other well-intended reasons they stand for, it will improve your entire behaviour towards rules and discipline – hey, you may never need to be disciplined again! 

Please do share your thoughts around this topic on social media or leave your comments below. 

Have you ever been on the wrong side for breaking the rules? What did you learn from the consequences you had to endure? Everything that happens is meant to be a lesson in life and it’s a choice as to how you act. All that remains to be said is to avoid the consequences by being amazing and abiding by the rules ☺

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Do as I say -- not as I do! One dad's story of breaking the rules

Ever drive faster than the speed limit, with your children watching from the back seat? Or sneak a candy bar into a movie theater (and share it with your kids)? As parents, how do we justify the occasional rule-breaking when we are trying to teach our children to be fine, upstanding citizens? NBC News Senior Editor John Baiata faced this dilemma during a recent walk in the woods with his daughter.

By John Baiata, TODAY Moms contributor

Ever been called out by one of your kids? It happened to me recently, and it took a moment to prepare what I hoped would be an appropriate response.  I was hiking through the woods with my daughter and our dog.

“Dad, the sign says ‘Dogs must be leashed at all times,’” my daughter said, in a tone that was more admonition than statement of fact.   

“Honey, there’s no one else around, and Ruby (our dog) needs to learn how to behave when she is off the leash, too.  I think it will be OK.”

I could see her processing my answer. My wife and I are constantly stressing to our two children that there are rules in life that must be followed – and consequences to be suffered when they’re not.  What kind of message was I sending by ignoring a rule that was so very clearly spelled out? 

Those same woods lead to a lake that is a popular swimming hole during the summer – despite the clearly visible “no swimming” signs. Years ago – pre-kids – a park ranger approached me as I sat at the lake’s edge drying off after a swim, reminding me of the “no swimming” rule. I replied by saying people had likely been swimming in the lake for hundreds of years, would be for hundreds more, and offered to pay the fine if he felt it necessary to write me a ticket. (He didn’t.)

I chafe at the surfeit of rules that our overly litigious society has spawned. Lakes were made for swimming, beaches for frisbee, and woods for dogs to roam free. As the song goes, “Do this, don’t do that, can’t you read the sign?” 

But kids change everything, and I wonder if I’d have been so nonchalant with that park ranger had my kids been around then.  I’d have certainly warned them of the dangers of swimming without an adult present. And breaking the law is different from breaking rules: I want my kids to grow to be independent thinkers, not convicted felons.

My son (a kindergartner) and daughter (second grade) attend a school where hugging is not permitted. The reason is not spelled out, but presumably it is out of concern the children might touch each other inappropriately. If you’ve ever laid eyes on a pack of 8-year-old girls, you know how laughably impossible it is to enforce this rule.  It also goes against virtually everything I’ve tried to instill in my children. I’ve told them I think the rule is ridiculous, and not to fret if they break it. 

Of course, most of us break rules every day. Ever drive more than 55mph?  Bring a candy bar into a movie theatre? And most of us would not hesitate to break the law if circumstances demand – smashing a window to escape a fire, for instance.   

But is it possible to set a good example for your children while defying a rule or law you don’t believe in?  Dave Riley, a professor of Human Development and Family studies at the University of Wisconsin, says it is, “as long as you involve your child in thinking through the moral dilemma.”  The key, he says, is taking the time to talk through the reasoning behind a decision, and the potential consequences. “Because I said so,” says Riley, is the worst answer you can give a child.

As a parent, I often find myself wrestling with scenarios that haven’t even presented themselves yet.  Allow my children to drink alcohol before the age of 21? Better they learn to drink responsibly under our watchful eye than, say, at a freshman college keg party, right?  Not such an easy decision when you consider the potential legal consequences for both parent and child. 

A more nuanced approach to these types of situations is called for as your children mature, says Riley.  You should begin to loosen your veto power on some decisions by laying out the pros and cons, and then letting them decide. “You can never prepare your child for every decision they are going to face,” says Riley.  In the end, the best any parent can do is instill their children with their values, and hope for the best.

So take that illicit dip in the lake, and enjoy that candy bar. Just remember: your kids are watching. And taking notes.

John Baiata is a Senior Editor for NBC News.

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Is it okay to break the rules?

Children ask me this all the time.

• They read a story in which the writer starts a sentence with “because,” something they have been forbidden to do. “So why can’t I start a sentence that way?”

• They read a conversation in which someone uses the word “gonna.” “So why can’t I do that?”
• Their teachers tell them every paragraph needs five sentences and every essay needs five paragraphs. But I show them editorials or columns from newspapers which don’t follow these rules.  “So why can’t I do thatt?”
• They (used to) learn cursive, but they’d see an adult’s signature composed of part cursive, part printing, and part illegible writing. “So why can’t I do that?”

We adults break the rules of writing all the time.  Using bullets, as I did above, is technically breaking the rules of paragraphing, yet bullets add white space and show a pattern of thought.  Bulleted items are usually short and easy to read.  They invite reading the way denser paragraphs do not.  Why not break the paragraphing rules if more people will read what we write and the writing is clear?

With children I suggest the following line of thinking about “rules” of writing.

• Will I get in trouble if I break the rule? Usually, this means, Will my teacher lower my grade if I break the rule?  If the answer is yes, then follow the rule unless you have a mighty good reason not to and are willing to accept a lower grade.
• Is your writing easier to understand if you break the rule? If the answer is yes, then break the rule.  Clarity outranks any stylistic tradition.  But usually rules were invented to add clarity.
• Are you experimenting? If so, follow rules which make sense and ignore rules which inhibit your imagination.

Some of you might say that my “line of thinking” above is really a set of rules.  Yes, they offer guidance the way rules do.  But no, they are not hard and fast, and they allow the writer to choose his own rules as long as he can live with the consequences, the way adults do.

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