ap world history dbq thesis examples

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AP World History: Modern Sample Long Essay Question

AP World History: Modern Sample Long Essay Question

In the period 1850 to 2001, new technologies emerged that had significant social, political, and economic effects. Develop an argument that evaluates the extent to which changes in the spread of ideas/information before and after World War I impacted societies.

Step 1: Analyze the Prompt

As you choose which question you will answer, begin thinking about what your thesis will entail and how your essay will demonstrate a complex understanding. The notes of a sample high- scoring writer are below. Note that the writer plans to develop a complex argument by addressing not only changes, as required by the prompt, but also continuities in societies before and after World War I.

Thesis : changes: faster spread of ideas made news, politics, and war more immersive and fast-paced; continuity: cross-cultural interactions transform all cultures (complex understanding, historical skill)

Step 2: Plan Your Response

  • Context : Gutenberg → 2nd industrial revolution (steamship, train, telegraph) → digital revolution (radio, TV, Internet)
  • Thesis : changes: faster spread of ideas made news, politics, and war more immersive and fast-paced; continuity: cross-cultural interactions transform all cultures ( complex understanding, historical skill )
  • Evidence : War of 1812 versus WWII, Vietnam, Gulf War
  • Evidence : American Revolution versus Cold War
  • Evidence : language: Arab traders & Swahili, and modern business & English
  • ¶ conclusion: impacts of tech on society have become more pervasive, though tendency towards cross-cultural influence has persisted

Step 3: Action! Write Your Response & Step 4: Proofread

Sample high-scoring response.

A key change between these eras of communication is how the speed of ideas’ dissemination impacts their force of impact and makes news more pervasive in civilians’ lives. In the distant past, the slow rate of communication caused reactions that were often months, or even years, after the initial communication. For instance, the final battle of the War of 1812 was fought after the signing of the war’s peace treaty because news had not yet traveled by ship across the Atlantic Ocean. In contrast, the peace treaties of WWII were celebrated in cities around the world mere minutes after news of their signing was shared by telegram and radio signals. The quick spread of images and video from the Vietnam conflict helped intensify Americans’ resistance to the war. In recent decades, 24-hour live coverage of conflicts, as in CNN’s being the first to provide constant coverage of a war during the Gulf War, allowed policy- makers and civilians to respond instantly to developments. As news became quicker, so its impact became more significant and more immediate.

Another change is that the quick and pervasive spread of ideas has made political conflicts more ideological and propaganda-based, further drawing societies into global disputes. Political rebellions of the eighteenth century, such as the American and French Revolutions, were based on Enlightenment ideals such as equality and representative government; they made use of propaganda in the form of printed political cartoons, tracts, and engravings to spread their ideals among the populace. However, the news communication made possible by radio and television after World War II helped propel the ideological conflict between the communist Soviet Union and the democratic United States into a worldwide phenomenon that intensely impacted both nations’ citizens. Technology was able to so effectively spread this war of ideas that the two major superpowers never engaged in direct battle themselves; still, citizens were drawn into a culture of propaganda that demonized the other side, made bomb shelters and bomb drills a part of daily life due to fear of nuclear warfare, and saw governments pour millions of dollars into the space race. Technology thus made it possible for conflicts to become all-immersive, even if they were based on ideas rather than physical confrontations.

Despite changes in communication, constants about its impacts remain. Cross- cultural communications still transform societies as they borrow and adapt ideas from others. For instance, from the eighth century onward, Arab traders who traveled throughout West Africa and along the eastern and northern coasts not only enriched communities economically but also spread Islam. Further, the necessity for communication among traders led to the rise of Swahili, a language that combined Arabic and African words and is still the lingua franca in much of East Africa today. Similarly, in modern times, as Britain and then the United States dominated world trade, English became a kind of worldwide lingua franca of modern business. Just as Arab traders spread their religion, American culture also diffused to other societies: almost every nation in modern times, for instance, built American-style fast food restaurants. Mirroring the trends related to the spread of news and politics, cultural diffusions in recent decades occurred at a faster rate and to a more pervasive extent than in the past. Whereas primarily traders would have adopted Swahili as it developed over generations, today English is taught in grade schools throughout the world.

Cultures that interact always influence each other. In the past century, how- ideas travel at a faster pace. As they have in ever, technology has made the impact of this spread of ideas more pervasive and significant as news and political the past, societies will continue to transform as they encounter ideas from other cultures, but with this increased intensity of communication, the impacts of ideas will continue to escalate.

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Where to Find the Best DBQ Examples

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Advanced Placement (AP)

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One of the best ways to prepare for the DBQ (the "document-based question" on the AP European History, AP US History, and AP World History exams) is to look over sample questions and example essays. Doing this will help you to get a sense of what makes a good (and what makes a bad) DBQ response.

That said, not all DBQ essay examples are created equal. We'll briefly cover what makes a good DBQ example and then provide a list of example essays by course. Lastly, we'll give you some helpful tips on how to best use sample essays in your own preparation process.

What's a Good DBQ Example?

Without a doubt, the best sample resources come from the College Board . This is because they are the ones who design and administer the AP exams . This means the following:

Any DBQ essay example that the College Board provides will include a real DBQ prompt

All samples are real student responses from previous years , so you know they were written under the same conditions you'll have when you write your DBQ—in other words, they're authentic!

They not only have scores but also explanations of each essay's score , in accordance with the rubric

Each prompt includes several sample essays with a variety of scores

Some DBQ examples outside those available from the College Board might be worth looking at, particularly if they highlight how a particular essay could be improved. In general, though, a superior example will do the following:

Include the prompt and documents: It will be much easier for you to see how the information from the documents is integrated into the essay if you can actually look at the documents themselves!

Have a score: Seems simple, but you'd be surprised how many DBQ examples out there in the uncharted internet don't have one. Without a real, official score, it's hard to gauge how trustworthy a sample actually is.

With that in mind, I have compiled lists, organized by exam, of high-quality example DBQs below.

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Don't spend all your study time on false starts with your practice DBQs. 

Every DBQ Example Essay You Could Ever Need, by Exam

Here are your example essays! We'll start with AP US History, then move to AP European History, and finally wrap up with AP World History.

AP US History: Official College Board Examples

The APUSH test was redesigned in 2015 and again in 2018, so right now there are eight  official College Board sets of sample essays you can use in your studies . Make sure to give yourself a 15-minute reading period and 45 minutes to write your answer. In addition, don't forget to use the current scoring guidelines when grading your own practice responses.

  • 2023 Free-Response Questions | Scoring Guidelines 2023
  • 2022 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2022
  • 2021 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2021
  • 2019 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2019
  • 2018 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2018
  • 2017 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2017
  • 2016 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2016
  • 2015 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2015

If you want additional sample question sets, you can look at older College Board US History DBQ example response sets . To look at these, click "Free-Response Questions" for a given year. For the corresponding DBQ examples and scoring guidelines, click "Sample Responses Q1."

Note that these examples use the old rubric (which is integrated into the Scoring Guidelines for a given free-response section). General comments on the quality of the essay, outside information, and document analysis still apply, but the score is on a 9-point scale instead of the current 7-point scale, and some of the particulars will be different. Older DBQs had up to 12 documents, while the current format has seven documents.

If you do look at older DBQ examples, I recommend using the current rubric to re-grade the essays in the sample according to the 7-point scale. I'll also give more advice on how to use all these samples in your prep later on.

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Mr. Bald Eagle is an AP US History DBQ grader in his spare time.

AP European History: Official College Board Examples

Unfortunately, there aren't as many sample resources for the AP Euro DBQ compared to the other AP history tests because 2016 was the first year the AP Euro test was administered in the new format . Since then, more minor changes have been made in terms of time (you now have an hour on the DBQ) and individual parts of the rubric (you can view the current scoring guidelines here ).

This means there are seven sets of official samples graded with the current 7-point rubric:

The rest of the existing available samples were graded in the old 9-point format instead of the 7-point format implemented in 2016.

In the old format, there were 6 "core" points and 3 additional points possible. The old rubric is integrated with the sample responses for each question, but we'll highlight some key differences between the old and current formats :

With the old format, you were given a brief "historical background" section before the documents

There were more documents—up to 12—but the current format has seven

There was an emphasis on "grouping" the documents that is not present in the current rubric

There was also explicit emphasis on correctly interpreting the documents that is not found in the current rubric

While the essential components of the DBQ are still the same between the two test formats, you should definitely refer to the current rubric if you decide to look at any old AP European History samples . You might find it useful to look at old essays and score them in accordance with the current rubric.

Here are the old sample DBQ questions and essays, organized by year:

  • 2014 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2014
  • 2013 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2013
  • 2012 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2012
  • 2011 Free-Response Questions | Sample DBQ Responses 2011

You can get samples in the old format all the way back to 1999 from the College Board . (Click "Free -Response Questions" for the questions and "Sample Response Q1" for the samples.)

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Consider how you might integrate this castle into the DBQ that is your life.

AP World History: Official College Board Examples

The World History AP exam transitioned to a new format to more closely resemble AP US History and AP European History for the 2017 test. This means that there are six past exams available that use the current DBQ format:

Note that starting with the 2020 exam, AP World History will only cover the years 1200 to the present instead of thousands of years of history. As a result, both the course and exam have been renamed AP World History: Modern (a World History: Ancient course is in the works). What this means for you is that previous DBQs might have to do with time periods you're no longer required to study, so just keep this in mind.

In the old format, there were 7 "core" points and 2 additional points possible. The old rubric is integrated with the sample responses for each question, but we'll highlight some key differences between the old and current formats :

There were more documents—up to 10—but the current format has seven

There was an emphasis on "grouping" the documents on the old rubric that is not present in the current rubric

  • In the old rubric, you needed to identify one additional document that would aid in your analysis; the new rubric does not have this requirement

The essential components of the DBQ are still the same between the two formats, though you should definitely look at the current rubric if you study with any old AP World History questions and samples. You might find it useful to look at the old essays and score them according to the current rubric.

Here are old AP World History questions and DBQ sample responses , organized by year:

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Don't worry, the old format isn't as old as this guy right here.

How Should I Use DBQ Examples to Prepare?

Now that you have all these examples, what should you do with them? In this section, we'll give you some tips on how to use example DBQs in your own AP history prep , including when to start using them and how many you should plan to review.

What Should I Do With These DBQs?

Official sample essay sets are a great way to test how well you understand the rubric. This is why we recommend that you grade a sample set early on in your study process—maybe even before you've written a practice DBQ .

Then, when you compare the scores you gave to the official scores and scoring notes given to the samples, you'll have a better idea of what parts of the rubric you don't really understand . If there are points you are consistently awarding differently than the graders, you’ll know those are skills you'll need to work on.

Keep giving points for the thesis and then finding out the sample didn't get those points? This tells you to work more on your thesis skills. Not giving points for historical context and then finding out the AP grader gave full credit? You need to work on recognizing what constitutes historical context according to the AP.

Check out my tips on building specific rubric-based skills in our guide on how to write a DBQ .

Once you've worked on some of those rubric skills you're weaker in, such as evaluating a good thesis or keeping track of how many documents were used, grade another sample set. This way you can see how your ability to grade the essays like an AP grader improves over time!

Obviously, grading sample exams is a much more difficult process if you're looking at examples in an old format. The old scores as awarded by the College Board will be helpful in establishing a ballpark —a 9 is still going to be a good essay using the current 7-point scale—but there may be some modest differences in grades between the two scales. (For example, maybe that perfect 9 is now more like a 6 out of 7 due to rubric changes.)

For practice grading with old samples, you might want to pull out two copies of the current rubric, recruit a trusted study buddy or academic advisor (or even two study buddies!), and have each of you re-grade the samples .

You can then discuss any major differences in the grades each of you awarded. Having multiple sets of eyes will help you determine whether the scores you're giving are reasonable, since you won’t have an official 7-point College Board score for comparison.

Looking for help studying for your AP exam? Our one-on-one online AP tutoring services can help you prepare for your AP exams. Get matched with a top tutor who got a high score on the exam you're studying for!

How Many Example DBQs Should I Be Using?

The answer to this question depends on your study plans.

If it's six months before the exam and you plan on transforming yourself into a hard diamond of DBQ excellence, you might do practice grading on a sample set every few weeks to a month to check your progress to being able to think like an AP grader. In this case, you would probably use six to nine official sample sets.

If, on the other hand, the exam is in a month and you're just trying to get in some extra skill-polishing, you might do a sample set every week to 10 days . It makes sense to check your skills more often when you have less time to study because you want to be sure that you are focusing your time on the skills that need the most work. For a short time frame, expect to use somewhere in the range of three to four official sample sets.

Either way, you should be integrating your sample essay grading with skills practice and doing some practice DBQ writing of your own .

Toward the end of your study time, you could even integrate DBQ writing practice with sample grading. Read and complete a timed prompt and then grade the sample set for that prompt, including yours! The other essays will help give you a sense of what score your essay might have received that year and any areas you might have overlooked.

There's no one-size-fits-all approach to using sample sets, but in general they are a useful tool for making sure you have a good idea what the DBQ graders will be looking for when you write your own DBQ on test day.

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Hey, where can we find a good DBQ around here?

Closing Thoughts: Example DBQs for AP History Tests

Example DBQ essays are a valuable resource in your arsenal of study strategies for the AP history exams. Grading samples carefully will help you get a sense of your own blind spots so you'll know what skills to focus on in your prep.

That said, sample essays will be most useful when integrated with your own targeted skills prep . Grading 100 sample essays won't help you if you aren't practicing your skills; rather, you'll just keep making the same mistakes over and over again.

Make sure you aren't using sample essays to avoid writing practice DBQs either—you'll want to do at least a couple, even if you only have a month to practice.

And there you have it, folks. With this list of DBQ examples and tips on how to use them, you are all prepared to integrate samples into your study strategy!

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What's Next?

Still not sure what a DBQ is? Check out my explanation of the DBQ to learn the basics.

Want tips on how to really dig in and study for AP history tests? We've got a complete how-to guide on preparing for and writing the DBQ .

If you're still studying for AP World History, check out our top AP World History study guide , or get more practice tests from our complete list .

Want more study material for AP US History? Look into this article on the best notes to use for studying from one of our experts. Also, read our review of the best AP US History textbooks !

Want to improve your SAT score by 160 points or your ACT score by 4 points?   We've written a guide for each test about the top 5 strategies you must be using to have a shot at improving your score. Download them for free now:

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Ellen has extensive education mentorship experience and is deeply committed to helping students succeed in all areas of life. She received a BA from Harvard in Folklore and Mythology and is currently pursuing graduate studies at Columbia University.

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High School Test Prep

AP World History DBQ

Below, you will find our practice AP World History DBQ which is part of our full-length AP World History practice exam . This DBQ reflects the type of content you may see on your exam and will help prepare you to evaluate primary sources and respond effectively to the prompts. Once you have written your own response, you can review our sample answer, which will guide you towards a perfect score!

1. Evaluate the effects of the Columbian Exchange on the peoples and cultures of the Old World (Europe, Asia, Africa) and the New World (Americas) from the late 15th century to the 17th century.

Document 1: 1493: Uncovering the New World Columbus Created,  Charles C. Mann, 2012. “Then as now, smoking was made to order for the boredom and inertia of army life. Tobacco was embraced by Ming soldiers, who disseminated it as they marched around the Empire. In the southwestern province of Yunnan, one physician reported, Chinese soldiers “entered miasma-ridden (malarial) lands, and none of them were spare disease except for a single unit, whose members were in perfect health. When asked the reason, the answer was that they all smoked.”…From that point, the account continued, “smoking spread…and now in the southwest, whether old or young, they cannot stop smoking from morning until night.” As a child in the 1630’s, the writer Wang Pu had never heard of tobacco. When he grew to adulthood, he later recalled, “customs suddenly changed, and all the people, even boys not four feet tall, were smoking.””  

ap world history dbq thesis examples

Document 3: The Body of the Conquistador,  Rebecca Earle, 2012.  “The parallels between the introduction of European foods and European religion shaped the imagination of colonial actors in the sixteenth century. Writers often spoke of ‘planting’ the faith, and missionaries hoped to reap a good harvest of new souls. Christianity was a tender shoot introduced to a fertile or hostile soil. Such language drew on long-standing Christian traditions, for evangelisation had for centuries been presented as a form of spiritual gardening, using imagery derived from the Bible itself.”

Document 4: Excerpt from Christopher Columbus’s journal (1492) “They [the natives] brought us parrots and balls of cotton and spears and many other things… They willingly traded everything they owned… They were well-built, with good bodies and handsome features… They do not bear arms, and do not know them, for I showed them a sword, they took it by the edge and cut themselves out of ignorance. They have no iron. Their spears are made of cane… They would make fine servants… With fifty men we could subjugate them all and make them do whatever we want.”

Document 5: Letter from Hernán Cortés to Emperor Charles V (1520) “The city [Tenochtitlan] is as large as Seville or Cordova; its streets, I speak of the principal ones, are very wide and straight; some of these, and all the inferior ones, are half land and half water, and are navigated by canoes. We have seen so many cities built in the water and other great towns on dry land, and that straight and level highway leading to Mexico, we were astounded… The market place is twice as large as that of Salamanca and is surrounded by porticoes, where there are daily more than sixty thousand souls, buying and selling.”

Document 6: “An Account, Much Abbreviated, of the Destruction of the Indies” by Bartolomé de las Casas (1552) “The Indies were discovered in the year one thousand four hundred and ninety-two… Forty-nine years have passed since the first settlers penetrated the land, the first being the large and most happy isle called Hispaniola which is six hundred leagues in circumference. Around it in all directions are many other islands, some very big, others very small, and all of them were, as I saw with my own eyes, densely populated with native peoples called Indians. This large island was perhaps the most densely populated place in the world.”

Document 7: “The Commentaries of the Great Afonso Dalboquerque, Second Viceroy of India” by Afonso de Albuquerque (1515) “Upon our arrival at the Island of Ormuz, we were greeted by a diverse assembly of merchants from India, Persia, and beyond. Our ships were laden with a variety of goods, including precious metals and exotic spices. Among these, we introduced several plants from the New World, such as maize, which was unknown in these lands. The local inhabitants were intrigued by these new crops, and their interest quickly turned to eagerness as they began to cultivate them. The maize, in particular, thrived in this climate, promising to become a staple in their diet.”

In your response, you should do the following:

  • Use the above documents to construct an essay that responds to the prompt.
  • State a clear thesis that addresses the effects of the Columbian Exchange on both the Old and New Worlds.
  • Include contextual information relevant to the period of the Columbian Exchange.
  • Analyze at least two of the documents for their point of view, purpose, historical situation, and/or audience.
  • Incorporate at least one additional piece of historical evidence beyond the documents provided.
  • Demonstrate complex understanding through sophisticated argumentation and effective use of evidence.

Once you have written your response, review our sample answer to see a response that would earn a perfect score on the official exam.

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AP World DBQ Contextualization and Thesis Practice

11 min read • july 11, 2024

Eric Beckman

Eric Beckman

Evan Liddle

Evan Liddle

Melissa Longnecker

Melissa Longnecker

Practicing DBQ prompts is a great way to prep for the AP exam! Review practice writing samples of the opening paragraph of a DBQ and corresponding feedback from Fiveable teachers Melissa Longnecker, Eric Beckman, and Evan Liddle.

The DBQ Practice Prompt

  • This is the type of paragraph that can open a DBQ. But, I recommend outlining how you will use the documents as evidence  before  writing your thesis.
  • As you read the document-based question, I recommend taking brief notes on the prompt and each document. Record what the prompt is asking, how each document relates to the prompt, and how the sourcing affects the document and/or a response to the prompt. Don’t write too much, but you will find these notes useful when while composing your answer.

Evaluate the extent to which rulers of early modern empires, c. 1450 - c. 1750, used traditional methods to consolidate their power.

Use the documents and your understanding of World History to write ONE (no more!) paragraph with

  • Broader historical context for the prompt
  • A thesis in response to the prompt

ap world history dbq thesis examples

Illustration of the First Battle of Panipat (1526), near Delhi, in the Baburnama, the autobiography of Babur. Manuscript prepared for his grandson, Emperor Akbar after Baur’s death, c. 1590

ap world history dbq thesis examples

DBQ Writing Samples & Feedback

Dbq student practice sample 1.

From 1200 to 1450, the rulers of empires came up with several methods conssolidating power. An example of this is the Mongol’s implementation of trade and tolerance of the spread of religion. This paved the way for future rulers to hold power while ensuring that their empire would thrive. Rulers of empires between 1450 and 1700 relied heavily traditional methods such as an trade and an established currency system to consolidate their power.

Teacher feedback:

This is an excellent first step, I can tell from your answer you do have the basic idea of what context is supposed to be.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 2

The Ottoman, Mughal, and Safavid Empires, formerly known as the “Gunpowder Empires”, were spreading rapidly. The Qing Dynasty was also spreading Europe is trying to expand and build maritime empires, and trade routes are connecting the Americas to Europe. Rulers of early modern empires circa 1450-1750 very effectively used traditional methods to consolidate power, for example, Suleiman I, a former ruler of the Ottoman Empire conquers Tripoli in North Africa and starts a period of reform called the Devishrime; in the Safavid Empire, Shah Abbas comes to power in 1588 and tries to modernize the empire through encouraging trade and building bureaucracy, and in the Mughal Empire, Akbar establishes Divine Faith in attempts to normalize religious tolerance.

Context can be focused on the time period under discussion but context usually branches out into time before and possibly even after the prompt’s time period. You do have an excellent, if narrow, thesis.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 3

Before the time period of 1450-1700,the Mongols contributed to the downfall of the Abbasid caliphate as they invaded it and weakened its political influence.This caused the development of network exchanges like the silk road and Indian ocean trade routes. As a result,religions like Christianity and Islam spread and diffused but it is not always tolerated.Rulers of early modern empires used traditional methods to consolidate power like in the ottoman empire, the sultan Suleiman ,was obeyed by janissaries so this is how he got a bigger military and smarter government,in the safavid empire the ruler attempts to build a bureaucracy and modernize

Something to keep in mind is that while connecting to other events keep in mind connections and causation. For example how is the fall of the Abbasid Caliphate connected to the Silk Road. The common denominator is the Mongols, but it does not read as such. You end your context by discussing tolerance which might be a nice transition to discussing the tolerance of the Gunpowder Empires, keep that in mind.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 4

Although the potency of empires and dynasties apart of the early modern era was composed through more-novelty methods such as sabotage and social hierarchy change, because consolidation was implemented through pervasive conversions such as how the Ottomans used the Hagia Sophia and the use of trade such as the Portuguese assimilating dominance across the trading route of the Indian Ocean methodization for imperialism between 1450 and 1700 tends to take on more traditional forms, therefore religious legitimization and commerce were attractive for gaining power to empire rulers. The differentiation of methods was promoted during the postclassical era (1200-1450). This is shown in how the Song Dynasty brought out power through advancement in multiple fields; through the allowance of varying methods power was well achieved, almost acting as a model for future imperial powerholders.

Your context is well done. While using advanced language is fine, just be sure you are clear on the meaning of these words. Your thesis, which is excellent, seems to come in the middle of the paragraph. This works, though it is a bit hard to follow.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 5

In the years leading up to 1450, The Mongols gained power all over Afro-Eurasia through their harsh warfare lead by Genghis Khan. The Mongols controlled many of the trade routes such as the Silk Roads. When they eventually fell they split up into 4 Khanates spread out over Afro-Eurasia. With these new empires forming, emperors needed to have complete power over these territories. Although few rulers created new ways to control their conquered people such as new economic advantages in Western Europe, during the period 1450-1750, rulers used traditional methods to consolidate their power by warfare, adapting/keeping previous cultures in the Middle East and Asia, and controlling international trade.

Your Context while detailed and provides a timeline to follow it does not transition smoothly into your thesis. Consider mentioning the Mongols, but in a way that dovetails into what your thesis will be about such as Mongol ruling policy or warfare. Also your thesis can be made stronger with a specific reference to a previous culture or an example of controlling international trade.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 6

Prior to 1450, vast trade networks such as the Silk Roads and the Indian Ocean networks arose, increasing interregional connection across Afro-Eurasia. This increase in connection between cultures and peoples and the use of newer technologies such as gunpowder facilitated the growth of large empires throughout the entirety of Afro-Eurasia. After the rulers of these empires had conquered enough territory, they had to find ways to solidify, or consolidate, their power over these large, culturally diverse areas of land. Although some empires used traditional religious ideals to consolidate their power, most empires turned to radical changes in the way in which trade was conducted and the unprecedented strengthening of military assets in order to accomplish this goal.

Your context is excellent, and it dovetails nicely into your thesis. Your thesis could be a bit more specific. What military assests? What trade? One good specific example really helps.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 7

Previously, in 1200-1450, empires like the Abbasid Empire and Mongol empire expanded and consolidated power through developments in technology like caravans and saddles, and also through military conquests like the implementation of the Mongolian Khanates. These approaches characterized how empires consolidated power during the postclassical era. Starting in 1450-1750 rulers of early modern empires shifted to a more traditional approach to consolidating their power through the use of religious tolerance and military conquest . Specifically, the gunpowder empires used both religious worship and militaristic conquering to expand consolidate and legitimize. Also, empires in a East Asia like the powerful Ming Dynasty expanded vastly through the conquering of lands in Mongolia and Central Asia. Lastly empires in Europe consolidated power through the development on new monarchies that centralized power through controlling taxes, army and religion. Through conquest, religious tolerance and centralized government, rules in the modern era were able to successfully consolidate power.

Your context is well done, balancing specific evidence with general trends. Your thesis is a bit long though. May I suggest combining the last three sentences into one using commas to list ideas. For example the Ming conquest of Mongolia, New Monarchs in Europe. et all

DBQ Student Practice Sample 8

In the late 14th century the Ottoman Empire developed a system called devshirme that staffed their military and government. This system expanded in the 15th and 16th centuries and continued to build up the Ottoman military. Christian boys were recruited by force to serve in the Ottoman government. The most well known group were Janissaries, which formed elite forces in the Ottoman army. The other Christian boys that were forcibly removed from their families had to be completely loyal to the sultan and some of them served as bodyguards. Janissaries were able to gain more power in the Ottoman Empire and some families wanted their sons to become a part of the service. The Ottomans could control the conquered Christians through the use of Janissaries in their armies. In 1450-1750, rulers of early modern empires used traditional methods such as improved military forces to consolidate their power.

This is an excellent description of how the system helped strengthen the Ottoman Empire, but in terms of either Contextualizing Units 3/4 or serving as a Thesis this would not work, it is too narrow, only one idea. A good thesis would have 2-3 ideas.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 9

There were three important ways that the leaders of states and empires consolidated their rule before 1450: the conquering of new lands, the proliferation of certain religions or religious tolerance, and by proliferating trade along the Indian Ocean, the Silk Road, and the Trans-Saharan trade network. Religions such as Islam and syncretic sects spread across the Trans-Saharan, Indian Ocean, and Silk Road trade networks. Empires from 1200-1450 often instritued currencies and encouraged trade to spread their empire’s religion. The Mongols controlled much of the Silk Road during the 13th and early 14th centuries. However, theMongols’ rule fell in the 14th century due to the fragmentation of the empire; the Ming, Ottoman, and Russian empires subsequently sprang up. The Ottoman, Mughal and Russian empires conquered other lands from 1450-1750 and either proliferated a certain religion or they instituted a religious tolerance policy within their empires. European empires arose in 1450-1750 by conquering trade ports and lands from around the world. Explorers also tried to proselytize others. European conquerers administered these lands by controlling the production and exportation of valuable agricultural goods to Europe, and by using forced labor systems to produce goods such as sugar and tobacco. Although rulers of early modern empires in 1450-1750 conquered foreign lands and proliferated a religious policy by emphasizing religious tolerance or by encouraging the conversion of others to one religion, European empires used maritime technologies to aid them in conquering other lands worldwide. Empires in Africa and Asia in 1450-1750 still conquered empires on land, and religious tolerance was an idea that was much more common there than in European conquests of foreign lands.

Your context is quite excellent and blends nicely into the thesis. For your thesis, it could be shorter and be strengthened by adding a specific technology such as one maritime technology or a religious that was spread by an empire. That last sentence is not nessessary unless thats part of your consolidation argument.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 10

Before the 15th century, many different empires have shown highly traditional values that have been used to cosolidate power. Among these states are the Mongols who showed major tolerance to other cultures and helped to expand trade. The Byzantine empire was also a nation that resisted up to the 15th century and, despite the constant Islamic attempts of invasion, they had religious tolerance and were open to negotiate with various merchants and leaders including Muslims. Although the empires that remained and emerged during 1450-1750 used new innovations to maintain their power and keep as well as protect their people, being tolerant to new cultures and encouraging the expansion of trade was also important to consolidate their power.

Your paragraph shows understanding of the time period before and during this DBQ. Specifically:
Describes a broader historical context relevant to the prompt :  maybe , the Mongols and the Byzantine empire were context for early modern empires, but this would be stronger with a clear link to the developments you will discuss in your essay. Did later Empires adopt these techniques from the Mongols and Byzantines?
2**. Responds to the prompt with a historically defensible thesis/claim:** yess you have an evaluation, although this could be more clear, and you lay out a line of reasoning.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 11

Prior to 1450 many empires consolidated powers through multiple ways. For example, China used Confucianism to create a bureaucracy through the civil service on Confucian ideals. On the the other hand, the Mongols consolidated power through heavy secure control of the silk roads through large khanates and the policy of Pax Mongolica (Mongol Peace). In addition, they used religious tolerance since they really didn’t have a culture of their own and also to avoid any attempted cultural revolts. Although belief systems were a traditional way to consolidate power, such as China’s use of Confucianism, many nations used military expansion through gunpowder weaponry and also through expansion of trade

Be careful with claiming that societies lacked culture, that is essentially impossible, even if in societies which adapt elements of other cultures.
1.  Describes a broader historical context relevant to the prompt:   attempted  , Confucianism and the Mongols are elements of context, but this needs a clear connection to the prompt. How did these developments create the context for the growth of early modern empires?
Responds to the prompt with a historically defensible thesis/claim:  attempted -you outline a couple of reasonable claims&mdash:which is good—this lacks an evaluation. How much do did early modern empires rely on traditional, as opposed to innovative, means? This requires a qualifier, such as strongly or secondarily.

DBQ Student Practice Sample 12

In the 13th century, the Mongols marched across Eurasia and soon became the largest continuous land empire in history. Throughout their rule, they revitalized international trade and built a system of roads which they maintained and guarded. The Mongols ruled successfully due to their understanding of centralized power which was soon spread and copied by other empires. After their fall in the mid 14th century, other empires like the Ottomans and the Safavids, rose to power as a result of their own military might along with the weakness and corruption of the regimes that they replaced. Although wealth and religious ideals were essential to early modern empires, traditional methods like increased trade and advancements in the military were used to consolidate power in the period of 1450 to 1750.

Describes a broader historical context relevant to the prompt :  yes , the Mongol Empire is relevant context, and, more importantly, you connect this to Empire building in the time period of the prompt. This would be even stronger with connection to at least one more empire, besides the Ottomans, from the documents. Safavids would be excellent as outside evidence.
2.  Responds to the prompt with a historically defensible thesis/claim :  maybe , this addresses the prompt, but may not be historically defensible because wealth and religious ideals were also traditional methods of imperial rule.

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