Pun and Jokes

Laughing at the Life of a Ph.D.: 107+ Hilarious Ph.D. Jokes

Introduction.

Pursuing a Ph.D. is an impressive and challenging journey filled with academic rigor and intellectual growth. But every scholar deserves a break and a good laugh. 

In this article, we bring you a collection of light-hearted Ph.D . jokes that will tickle your funny bone. Let’s take a humorous detour from the world of academia and enjoy a bit of academic humor!

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Ph.D. Jokes

  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a ladder to class? To get to the highbrow discussions, of course!
  • What do you call a Ph.D. student who enjoys gardening? A “doctor in bloomology.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student stay up all night? Because they were trying to find the elusive “eureka” moment.
  • How does a Ph.D. student greet someone? “Hey, I’m a doctor. Well, almost.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a notebook to the conference? To record all the “wise” remarks!
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite type of music? “Theore-melodies.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student love math jokes? Because they were absolutely “integer”-taining.
  • What do you call a Ph.D. student’s favorite place in the library? The “thesis” section, of course!
  • Why did the Ph.D. student have a pet owl? Because it’s the only bird that can say “dissertation”!
  • How does a Ph.D. student solve a problem? They form a “committee” and write a proposal, of course!
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite word? “Citation,” because they love giving credit where credit is due.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student carry a backpack to the lab? To make sure they had enough “space” for their research!
  • What do you call a Ph.D. student who moonlights as a chef? A “doctor in gastronomics.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a magnifying glass to the thesis defense? To “focus” on the finer details.
  • How does a Ph.D. student order coffee? “One caffeine molecule, please!”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite app? “Notepad Pro,” for jotting down those groundbreaking ideas.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student choose to study chemistry? Because they wanted to have all the “solutions”!
  • What do you call a Ph.D. student’s favorite type of humor? “Academ-puns,” because they’re pun-derful!
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a thesaurus to the exam? To find a “synonym” for success!
  • How does a Ph.D. student get inspired? They read a thesis and think, “I can do better than that!”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s secret superpower? The ability to turn coffee into thesis chapters.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student attend the conference in pajamas? Because they believe in “sleep-search.”
  • What do you call a Ph.D. student’s preferred mode of transportation? The “scholar-ship.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a toolbox to the lecture? To “fix” any gaps in their knowledge.
  • How does a Ph.D. student describe their ideal date? “A peer-reviewed evening with intellectual compatibility.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student start a bakery? Because they wanted to knead some “dough” for research.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite exercise? “Critical bench-pressing.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a telescope to the library? To find those obscure references, of course!
  • How does a Ph.D. student introduce themselves at a party? “I’m like a Ph.D., but funnier.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a gardener? Because they wanted to conduct experiments on “plant-tations.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite subject in school? “Thesis-tory.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a highlighter to the lab? To make sure they didn’t “research” in the dark.
  • How does a Ph.D. student describe their research? “Like solving a mystery, but with more coffee.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s preferred form of communication? “Hypo-thesis statements.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a ladder to the graduation ceremony? To reach new heights of accomplishment.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite holiday? “Dissertation Day” – it’s like Christmas for scholars!
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a bag of alphabet pasta to the exam? To spell out the answers.
  • How does a Ph.D. student tell time? “In thesis chapters, of course!”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite game? “Hide and Publish,” because they’re always hunting for elusive research.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a GPS to the conference? To navigate through the sea of academic jargon.

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Funny Ph.D. One-Liners

  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s go-to snack? “Data chips,” for intellectual sustenance.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student attend a stand-up comedy show during finals week? Because they needed a “study break” full of laughs.
  • How does a Ph.D. student decorate their office? With “post-grad” posters and a perpetual coffee pot.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite bedtime story? “The Thesaurus and the Hare.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student choose to study psychology? Because they wanted to understand the “mind-boggling” aspects of academia.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite outdoor activity? “Peer-reviewed hiking” for fresh air and fresh ideas.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a map to the research expedition? To prove that they were “on the right track.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student stay warm in the winter? With a “thesis scarf” to keep the cold drafts of doubt away.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s ideal vacation destination? The “Library of Paradise,” where they can read and relax.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a jar of pickles to the lab? Because they heard it was a great way to conduct “dill-experiments.”
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a musician? Because they wanted to research the “sound science” of laughter.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite breakfast cereal? “Hypothesis Puffs,” for a scholarly start to the day.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a compass to the conference? To ensure they never lost their way in academic discussions.
  • How does a Ph.D. student organize their bookshelf? “By the Dewey Decimal System, but with a thesis on top.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite place in the world? The “Library of Alexandria,” if it were still standing.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a meteorologist? Because they wanted to predict the “forecast” for groundbreaking research.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite accessory? A “pro-thesis” cap, for those moments of academic celebration.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a ruler to the research lab? To ensure their data was always “measurelessly accurate.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student describe their social life? “Data-driven and hypothesis-hopeful.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite board game? “Stratego…thesis edition,” for intellectual battles.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student start a podcast? To discuss their findings and hypotheses with a “sound” audience.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s preferred mode of transportation? The “thesis-tube,” for quick journeys through knowledge.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a magnifying glass to the library? To find the tiniest details in the sea of information.
  • How does a Ph.D. student send text messages? With “peer-reviewed emojis” and scholarly language.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite kind of art? “Ab-stract,” because they appreciate the obscure and unexplained.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a detective? To solve the mysteries of “unsolved hypotheses.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite place to unwind? “The Quiet Room,” for moments of silent contemplation.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a calculator to the lab? To prove that research was a “calculated risk.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student plan a surprise party? With a “double-blind invitation” to ensure no leaks.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s preferred pet? A “research retriever,” for their love of collecting data.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become an artist? To illustrate the “abstract art of academia.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite season? “Thesis-writing season,” of course!
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a map to the library? To navigate through the “volumes of wisdom.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student pack for a vacation? With “peer-reviewed luggage” and well-documented travel plans.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite superhero? “Doctor Strange,” for his mystical approach to research.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a broom to the lab? To sweep away any research dust.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite hobby? “Sudoku-solving,” for those moments of brain training.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a puzzle enthusiast? Because they loved piecing together “data jigsaw puzzles.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student prepare for a presentation? They practice their “thesis-timony” until it’s perfect.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite type of poetry? “Haiku-ptheses,” for concise academic expression.

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Humorous Ph.D. Jokes

  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a flashlight to the library? To shine a light on obscure references.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite way to relax? “Data-day spa” for intellectual pampering.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student start a YouTube channel? To share their “theoretical tutorials” with the world.
  • How does a Ph.D. student pack for a conference? With “hypothesis-suitcases” full of academic attire.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite musical instrument? The “research drum,” for intellectual beats.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a crossword enthusiast? To solve “knowledge crosswords.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s go-to accessory? A “thesis-ring” for intellectual commitment.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a magnifying glass to the lecture? To scrutinize every detail of the topic.
  • How does a Ph.D. student stay cool during the summer? With a “dissertation fan” to beat the heat.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite genre of literature? “Nonfiction-fiction,” for scholarly reading.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a historian? To uncover the “histo-theses” of the past.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite workout routine? “Thesis-robics,” for mental fitness.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a dictionary to the lab? To define success one word at a time.
  • How does a Ph.D. student take notes? With “annotated annotations” and meticulous highlighting.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite musical genre? “Ph.D.-estrian,” because they walk to the beat of their own research.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student start a blog? To share their “research musings” with the world.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite movie genre? “Docu-mentaries,” for factual entertainment.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a lab coat to the art museum? To investigate the “canvas of creativity.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student unwind after a long day of research? With a “peer-reviewed cup of tea.”
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite way to stay organized? “Thesis-planners” for academic scheduling.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a suitcase to the library? Because they wanted to check out a lot of knowledge.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite app? “Thesisbook,” for social networking with fellow scholars.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student become a chef? To master the “recipe for research.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student navigate through a dense academic text? With a “thesis GPS” to find their way.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s favorite type of music? “Dissertation-strumental,” for focused study sessions.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a backpack to the conference? To carry all their “intellectual baggage.”
  • How does a Ph.D. student organize their desk? With “peer-reviewed piles” of papers and books.
  • What’s a Ph.D. student’s preferred workout? “Hypo-thigh-sis” exercises to stay in shape.
  • Why did the Ph.D. student bring a stopwatch to the lecture? To measure the time spent on each topic.
  • How does a Ph.D. student order food at a restaurant? They ask for the “thesis special,” of course!

Read More: 

Jokes About Teacher Student

Jokes About Medical Students

A Ph.D. journey may be a serious pursuit, but a good laugh can always be a refreshing break. These Ph.D. jokes remind us that humor can be found in even the most intellectual of places. So, whether you’re a Ph.D. student or not, let’s appreciate the lighter side of academia.

Are these Ph.D. jokes meant to make fun of Ph.D. students?

Not at all! These jokes are meant to celebrate the academic journey with humor and affection, highlighting the lighter aspects of the Ph.D. experience.

Can Ph.D. students relate to these jokes?

Ph.D. students often enjoy academic humor and can certainly relate to the unique challenges and experiences referenced in these jokes.

Is humor important during a Ph.D. journey?

Yes, humor can be a valuable tool for maintaining a positive outlook, relieving stress, and fostering camaraderie among Ph.D. students.

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LaffGaff

PhD Jokes And Puns

These funny PhD jokes and puns are a real lesson in humor! In fact, they’re in a class of their own! No need to doctor them, they get top marks just as they are!

Funny PhD Jokes

My socially anxious friend just got a PhD in palindrome studies.

I call him Dr. Awkward.

What is Dr. Pepper’s PhD in?

I have finished writing my PhD thesis on penguins.

In hindsight, I probably should have written it on paper.

I got a PhD in rap and washing clothes.

They call me Dr. LaunDré.

What do you call an owl with a PhD?

I have a friend who just finished her PhD in Botany.

Instead of math and statistics, her dissertation is full of pictures of exotic plants.

She sure has a lot of photos in thesis.

A Gen Z kid and a boomer walk into a bar.

They sit down and the Gen Z kid orders from the gluten free vegan menu and the boomer orders a T-Bone steak.

They start chatting and the Gen Z kid says that social justice issues are the biggest problem facing the world, and that the white supremacist patriarchy is a plague on society.

The boomer waves this off and says the kids these days are just too sensitive, and that he fought for civil rights in the sixties and did his part.

They go back and forth on this for a while, and finally the Gen Z kid says, “We’re just not gonna settle this. We don’t see eye to eye. You’re too old and out of touch and I’m too young and inexperienced. What we need to do is ask a Millennial with a PhD in sociology for their opinion.”

The boomer says, “That’s a great idea!” And yells, “HEY BARTENDER, C’MERE!”

Flight attendant: Do we have a doctor on board?

Me: I have a PhD in mathematics.

Flight attendant: one passenger is having a heart attack and one passenger is having an asthma attack.

Me: nodding that makes two.

I have a PhD in procrastin …

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer.

“I just completed my PhD in Scottish poetry,” he tells the bartender. “Now I’ve got third degree Burns.”

What do you call a cat with a PhD in Marine Biology?

A Doctopuss.

What do you call a chili with a PhD?

Dr. Pepper.

Who is the only Looney Tunes character with a doctorate?

MIT’s Computer Science PhD application only accepts text files.

That’s really ASCII a lot, in my opinion.

My PhD was about torque.

I guess that makes me a spin doctor.

I have a friend who a PhD in interactions of matter and energy at all length and time scales in the physical universe.

The only job he could get was at a soda factory.

In a roundabout way, he did become a fizzicist.

Dad: “My first son has a PhD in arts, my daughter has two degrees in communication and journalism and my youngest son is a burglar.”

Friend: “Wow a burglar? You should kick him out!”

Dad: “Nah… he is the only one who makes money.”

A man walks into a bar and finds its patrons raucously celebrating with a young man standing on the bar shouting for more drinks, on him.

He walks up to the bar and shouts to the young man, “What’s the occasion?”

“My career’s in ruins!” the lad cackles.

The man, shocked, replies, “Then why are you celebrating?”

“I’ve just completed my PhD in archaeology!”

What’s the difference between a jungle cat who wrote his PhD thesis on the economic effects of taxation, and the order of insects that includes butterflies and moths?

One’s a leopard doctor of tax economy, the other’s a lepidopteral taxonomy.

So, I have this friend who studied to become an Egyptologist.

The only way he can make a living is by becoming a PhD and teach others to become Egyptologists.

As far as I’m concerned, it is a pyramid scheme.

A rabbit says to a fox, “I’m writing a dissertation on how rabbits eat foxes.”

“Come on, you know that’s impossible! No one will publish such rubbish.” says the fox.

“Well, follow me and I’ll show you.”

They both go into the rabbit’s dwelling and after a while, the rabbit emerges with a satisfied expression on his face.

Then comes a wolf.

“Hello, what are we doing these days?”

“I’m writing the second chapter of my thesis, on how rabbits devour wolves.”

“Are you crazy? Where is your academic honesty?”

“Come with me and I’ll show you.”

As before, the rabbit comes out with a satisfied look on his face and a diploma in his paw.

Finally, the camera pans into the rabbit’s cave and we see a mean-looking, huge lion, sitting, picking his teeth and belching, next to some furry, bloody remnants of the wolf and the fox.

The moral: It’s not the contents of your thesis that are important – it’s your PhD advisor that really counts.

I’ve been doing my psychology PhD thesis on the mental health and well-being of little people.

After 4 long years and multiple studies, I’ve concluded…

6 out of 7 dwarves aren’t Happy.

What do you call someone who does a BA in Arts, a MA in English and a PhD in Gender Studies?

A well educated Barista.

To the woman I met in the bar last night who was mad at me this morning…

I never said I had a PhD in theoretical physics. I said I had a theoretical PhD in physics.

What does PhD stand for?

Fancy Degree. It’s so fancy it’s spelled with a Ph.

After many years of studying at a university, I’ve finally become a PhD.

Or Pizza Hut Deliveryman as people call it.

Due to the size of my student loans for my PhD I have debts no honest man could pay.

Luckily I’m a statistician.

What’s the difference between a PhD in mathematics and a large pizza?

A large pizza can feed a family of four.

My PhD student claimed to have made a breakthrough in hyperbolic geometry.

Turns out he was just exaggerating.

I’m starting a charity for PhD students so they can finally afford to live on their own without the need for roommates.

It’s called “Doctors without Boarders.”

An illiterate dad and his son who has a PhD in astronomy went camping.

They unpacked and set up their tent.

After dinner they went to sleep.

A few hours later dad woke and was looking up at the stars.

He woke his son up and asked him, “What do you see?”

The son said, “Astronomically, it tells you that there are a lot of galaxies out there.”

His father interrupted, “No you idiot, someone stole the tent.”

What do call a fish with a PhD?

A brain sturgeon.

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Jokes About PhDs

If you liked these hilarious pun and jokes about PhDs, be sure to check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more funny jokes, such as these:

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PhD Puns: Playful Jokes for Doctoral Students

Celestino-Miller

  • March 18, 2024

In the world of academia, PhD students often find themselves drowning in research papers and late nights spent in the lab. However, amidst all the stress and hard work, there is also room for some humor in the form of hilarious PhD puns. These witty jokes and wordplay bring a much-needed lightness to the intense world of higher education, allowing students to bond over the shared experience of navigating the challenges of pursuing a doctorate degree.

From clever plays on words related to their specific field of study to puns about the never-ending dissertation process, PhD students have a knack for finding humor in the most unexpected places. These puns not only provide a moment of laughter in an otherwise serious environment but also serve as a way for students to connect and commiserate with one another over the unique struggles they face during their academic journey.

phd puns

Family Friendly Phd Puns

1. Why did the Ph.D. student bring a ladder to the library? Because they heard the exams were on a higher level. 2. How does a Ph.D. student organize their bookshelf? By theses. 3. Did you hear about the Ph.D. student who won the marathon? They wrote a dissertation on how to pace themselves. 4. Why did the Ph.D. student bring a pencil to the exam? In case they needed to draw some conclusions. 5. What did the Ph.D. student do on their day off? They took a break from the lab and had a eureka moment in the shower. 6. How did the Ph.D. student break up with their significant other? They said, “Our relationship is like my dissertation – it’s not working out.” 7. What did the Ph.D. student say when they finally defended their thesis? “I’m feeling very hypo-thesis-tical right now!” 8. Why did the Ph.D. student become a baker? They wanted to experiment with different types of dough-science. 9. How did the Ph.D. student fix their computer? They tried turning it off and on again, then wrote a thesis on technical problem-solving. 10. What did the Ph.D. student say to their advisor at graduation? “Thanks for being my thesaurus throughout this journey.” 11. Why did the Ph.D. student always carry a calculator? They wanted to add up all their accomplishments. 12. How does a Ph.D. student make tea? They steep it for exactly 5 published papers. 13. What did the Ph.D. student say to their research participants? “Thanks for being my data-sources of inspiration.” 14. What did the Ph.D. student say after their first year of grad school? “I’m one step closer to becoming the doctor my mother always wanted.” 15. How did the Ph.D. student celebrate finishing their dissertation? They threw a hypothesis testing party. 16. Why did the Ph.D. student choose to study psychology? They wanted to analyze their own psyche during the process. 17. What did the Ph.D. student do when their experiment failed? They wrote a journal article on the importance of resilience in academia. 18. How does a Ph.D. student relax after a long day of research? They unwind with some peer-reviewed journal articles and a glass of wine. 19. What did the Ph.D. student say to their non-academic friends? “Sorry, I can’t make it to your party, I have a date with my thesis.” 20. How does a Ph.D. student stay motivated during tough times? They remember that every setback is just another data point in their success story.

Best Phd Puns

1. Why did the Ph.D. student bring a ladder to the library? Because they heard the books were on another level! 2. Why did the scientist bring a marker to their presentation? Because they wanted to draw some conclusions! 3. Why did the computer scientist go broke? Because they used up all their cache! 4. Why did the biologist break up with their microscope? Because they couldn’t see things eye to eye! 5. Why did the mathematician get a pet snake? Because they wanted to study the python programming language!

One-liner Phd Puns

1. I’m so good at multitasking, I could write a dissertation while multitasking. 2. Why did the scientist break up with his girlfriend? He found out she was dating her hypothesis. 3. I’m not lazy, I’m just in a state of potential thesis. 4. I’m not a quitter, I’m just conducting a longitudinal study on procrastination. 5. Breaking news: Researcher discovered the cure for boredom. It’s called a Ph.D. 6. The only thing standing between me and my Ph.D. is everything that needs to be done. 7. Ph.D. students know how to make every minute count, especially the ones leading up to a deadline. 8. I’m not stressed, I’m just conducting an experiment on the effects of caffeine on productivity. 9. Ph.D. students have a way of turning coffee into late-night discoveries. 10. The only thing sharper than my mind is the number of tabs open on my browser right now. 11. Some people collect stamps, I collect data points for my research. 12. I’m not a perfectionist, I’m just striving for a statistically significant result. 13. Why did the Ph.D. student bring a ladder to class? To reach new heights of knowledge. 14. A thesis defense is just a fancy way of saying “let’s get ready to rumble with knowledge.” 15. A Ph.D. candidate walks into a bar and asks for the latest issue of the Journal of Experimental Bartending. 16. Why did the Ph.D. student bring a pencil to the exam? In case there was a “graph” question. 17. The only thing scarier than a blank page is a full citation list that needs to be written. 18. What do you call a Ph.D. student who always gets the best grades? A “genius bar.” 19. Why did the mathematician get a Ph.D. in geography? He wanted to study the correlation between pie charts and actual pie. 20. Grad school tip: Don’t cry over spilled data, just collect more and keep moving forward.

Homophonic Phd Puns

1. Did you hear about the scientist who got injured? He had a PHD (pun badly hurt). 2. Why did the professor bring a ladder to his lecture? He wanted to get to the highest degree – his PHD (pun higher degree). 3. I told my dad I was going to get my doctorate in comedy. He said, “So you’re going for a PHD (pun humorous degree)?” 4. My friend tried to make a joke about advanced degrees, but it just ended up being a PHD (pun hard to deliver). 5. Why did the researcher bring a map to the lab? To navigate his way to a PHD (pun higher degree). 6. The scientist’s favorite type of joke is a PHD (pun highly developed). 7. I asked the librarian for a book on puns related to doctorate degrees. She said, “Let me check the PHD (pun higher degree) section.” 8. Why did the physics professor make bad puns? He couldn’t help himself – it was in his PHD (pun hard-wired brain). 9. I can never remember jokes about advanced degrees. They always go PHD (pun higher dimension). 10. The mathematician made a joke about her extensive education. It was a PHD (pun high in digits). 11. Why did the biology professor start a comedy club? He wanted to study the science of PHD (pun humorous data). 12. I tried to tell my friend a doctorate-related joke, but I think it went PHD (pun hardly detectable). 13. The chemistry professor told a joke about advanced degrees. It was so funny, I think it deserves a PHD (pun hearty chuckle). 14. The engineer tried to make a joke about doctorate degrees, but it ended up being a PHD (pun hard drive). 15. Why did the psychology professor start a stand-up comedy career? He wanted to explore the PHD (pun humor depth). 16. The geologist’s favorite type of pun? A PHD (pun earthy humor). 17. I tried to make a witty comment about someone with a doctorate degree, but it just came out as a PHD (pun halfway decent). 18. The linguistics professor made a joke about doctorate degrees. It was a real PHD (pun language-dependent). 19. The astronomer tried to tell a joke about advanced degrees, but it was a PHD (pun heavenly dull). 20. Why did the computer scientist become a comedian? He wanted to program some PHD (pun humor dynamics).

Compound Phd Puns

1. Did you hear about the scientist who accidentally drank a beaker of chemicals? He passed his pH-D test! 2. Why did the biology professor break up with his girlfriend? She kept giving him pH-Drama! 3. I asked my friend if he had finished his doctoral thesis on acid-base reactions. He said, “I’m pH-Done with that!” 4. How do you know if someone has a PhD in chemistry? They’re always at the top of the pH scale! 5. The scientist got his pH-Degree in record time because he was so basic! 6. Why did the pH-D student bring a ladder to the lab? He heard the best research is conducted at a high pH-level! 7. The chemistry professor was feeling salty because his students kept making acid puns during his pH-D lecture. 8. The microbiologist said he was feeling neutral about his pH-D research project. 9. The physicist couldn’t understand why the chemist was so obsessed with pH-D puns until he realized they were in their element! 10. The organic chemist was so excited to defend her pH-D thesis that she was positively charged! 11. The biologist joked that getting a pH-D was the only way to stay balanced in the scientific community. 12. The environmental scientist joked that getting a pH-D was the key to maintaining a neutral relationship with her colleagues. 13. The geologist laughed that getting a pH-D was a rocky road, but worth the sediment in the end. 14. The mathematician teased that a pH-D was just a formula for success in the academic world. 15. The physicist quipped that a pH-D was the perfect solution to all his intellectual problems. 16. The engineer chuckled that a pH-D was the ultimate source of power in the knowledge industry. 17. The psychologist mused that a pH-D was the secret to unlocking the human mind. 18. The astronomer pondered if a pH-D was the universal truth to understanding the cosmos. 19. The nutritionist joked that a pH-D was the recipe for a fulfilling career in academia. 20. The archaeologist teased that a pH-D was the ancient key to unlocking the mysteries of the past.

Metaphoric Phd Puns

1. What do you call a bear with a PhD? A bear of very brainy. 2. Why did the PhD student bring a ladder to the library? To reach the highest shelves of knowledge. 3. Did you hear about the mathematician with a PhD who went broke? He just couldn’t figure out the equation for success. 4. How does a PhD student stay cool during exams? They just keep a thesis on things. 5. What do you call a PhD superhero? Doctorate Strange. 6. Why did the PhD student break up with their textbook? It didn’t have enough references. 7. How did the biologist with a PhD make friends? By introducing them to his cell culture. 8. What do you call a PhD student who loves to cook? A doctorate of deliciousness. 9. Why did the chemistry PhD student bring a ladder to the lecture? To reach new heights in their field. 10. What do you call a group of PhD students trapped in a room full of papers? A thesis conundrum. 11. Why did the psychology PhD student become a baker? To learn the secrets of the mind through baking. 12. How did the historian with a PhD make a fortune? By digging up buried treasures of knowledge. 13. What do you call a PhD student who loves to garden? A doctor of dirt. 14. Why did the PhD student bring a magnifying glass to the thesis defense? To examine every detail under scrutiny. 15. How did the linguist with a PhD apologize? By using the language of forgiveness. 16. What do you call a PhD student who loves to dance? A doctorate of rhythm. 17. Why did the physics PhD student bring a calculator to the party? To calculate the forces of attraction. 18. How did the literary critic with a PhD review a bad book? With a thesis of disapproval. 19. What do you call a group of exhausted PhD students? A research wreck. 20. Why did the archeologist with a PhD never lose his keys? Because he always digs up the past.

Syllepsis Phd Puns

1. Studying for a PhD is like riding a bike – it’s all about balance and perseverance. 2. A PhD is like a puzzle; you have to piece together knowledge to see the whole picture. 3. When pursuing a PhD, every day is a new chapter of your academic journey. 4. Getting a PhD is like climbing a mountain – it’s a challenging but rewarding journey. 5. Writing a dissertation for a PhD is like running a marathon – it’s a long and grueling process. 6. Pursuing a PhD is like planting a garden; you have to nurture your ideas to see them bloom. 7. A PhD student’s life is like a rollercoaster ride – full of ups, downs, and unexpected twists. 8. Going for a PhD is like cooking a gourmet meal – it takes time, effort, and careful planning. 9. Pursuing a PhD is like playing chess; you have to strategize your moves to succeed. 10. A PhD program is like a symphony; you have to harmonize your research to create a masterpiece. 11. Completing a PhD is like building a house – it requires a solid foundation and attention to detail. 12. Researching for a PhD is like solving a mystery; you have to piece together clues to find the answer. 13. Going for a PhD is like learning to dance; you need to practice, be disciplined, and have a good sense of rhythm. 14. Writing a thesis for a PhD is like crafting a work of art – it requires creativity and precision. 15. Pursuing a PhD is like preparing for a marathon; you have to train, stay focused, and never give up. 16. Getting a PhD is like mastering a musical instrument – it takes dedication, patience, and practice. 17. A PhD program is like a complex recipe; you have to follow each step carefully to achieve the desired result. 18. Researching for a PhD is like exploring a new territory; you have to be curious, brave, and persistent. 19. Going for a PhD is like playing a game of chess; you have to think several steps ahead to outsmart your opponents. 20. Completing a PhD is like reaching the summit of a mountain – the view is worth the climb.

Synthetic Phd Puns

1. Did you hear about the mathematician who got a PhD in geometry? Now she’s always around in every angle of the conversation. 2. I decided to write my thesis on puns and jokes, but my advisor said it was too much of a pun-ishment. 3. The scientist with a PhD in chemistry really knows how to bond with the crowd at parties. 4. The psychologist with a PhD must analyze every situation and find a deep meaning, it’s quite mind-boggling. 5. My friend who got a PhD in computer science is always coding for attention. 6. Did you hear about the biologist who got a PhD studying plants? Now she’s branching out into new research areas. 7. The historian with a PhD is always digging up old jokes to share at social gatherings. 8. The physicist with a PhD is a real force to be reckoned with in any discussion. 9. The economist with a PhD has a lot of wealth of knowledge to share with others. 10. The linguist with a PhD really knows how to spin a yarn in any conversation. 11. The engineer with a PhD is always building up new ideas to share with others. 12. The astronaut with a PhD is always reaching for the stars in any debate. 13. The sociologist with a PhD is quite adept at analyzing the dynamics of any group conversation. 14. The nutritionist with a PhD has a lot of food for thought to share with everyone. 15. The geologist with a PhD really rocks every discussion with their knowledge. 16. The architect with a PhD always has the blueprint for a great joke. 17. The artist with a PhD in fine arts is always painting a colorful picture in any conversation. 18. The nurse with a PhD really knows how to inject some humor into any situation. 19. The environmental scientist with a PhD is always planting ideas in other people’s minds. 20. The marine biologist with a PhD sure knows how to dive deep into any topic.

How to use Phd Puns in Conversation?

When engaging in a conversation about PhD studies, incorporating puns can not only lighten the mood but also demonstrate your clever wordplay. Whether you are a current PhD student, a graduate, or simply interested in the topic, adding some PhD-related puns can make the discussion more enjoyable. Here are some tips on how to use PhD puns in a conversation:

Know your audience

Before dropping PhD puns into the conversation, it’s essential to gauge the receptiveness of your audience. Some people might not be familiar with the world of PhD studies or might not find puns amusing. Make sure the individuals you are talking to are open to playful wordplay before incorporating any PhD-related puns.

Be relevant

When using PhD puns, ensure they are relevant to the topic at hand. Whether discussing research, academia, or the challenges of pursuing a doctorate, tie in the puns to make them more impactful. This not only shows your wit but also highlights your understanding of the subject matter.

Timing is everything

Like any form of humor, timing is crucial when incorporating PhD puns into a conversation. Look for natural openings where a pun can fit seamlessly without disrupting the flow of the discussion. Whether it’s a lighthearted comment during a break or a witty remark related to the topic, choose your moments wisely.

Experiment with wordplay

PhD puns can range from clever twists on research terms to playful interpretations of academic concepts. Get creative with your wordplay and experiment with different pun styles to see what resonates with your audience. Mixing up puns related to thesis writing, data analysis, or academic conferences can keep the conversation engaging and entertaining.

Practice makes perfect

Like any skill, incorporating puns into conversations takes practice. Don’t be discouraged if your puns don’t always land perfectly – keep trying and refining your pun delivery. With time and experience, you’ll become more adept at seamlessly integrating PhD puns into your discussions.

Conclusion From defending a thesis to celebrating graduation, PhD puns add a touch of levity to the often-intense journey of pursuing a doctorate. With their clever play on words and academic references, these jokes bring a smile to the faces of both aspiring and established scholars. Whether shared among colleagues in the laboratory or with friends at a post-defense celebration, the universal appeal of PhD puns transcends disciplines and brings people together through laughter.

As the academic community continues to grow and evolve, the tradition of sharing hillarious PhD puns is likely to endure as a cherished form of academic humor. These puns serve as a lighthearted reminder that even in the midst of rigorous research and scholarly pursuits, there is always room for a good laugh. With their creative wordplay and clever wit, PhD puns will undoubtedly continue to entertain and unite scholars of all backgrounds for years to come.

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A list of puns related to "Phd"

I call him Dr. Awkward

She sure has a lot of photos in thesis.

Parentheses

jokes on phd students

Theoretical Fizz-ics.

I guess that makes me a spin doctor

jokes on phd students

A pet-degree

I asked him if he is now called a Doctor of Pillosophy.

He's an aye doctor.

It was a 2nd-degree burn.

It was a third degree burn

They were all arrested for third-degree murder.

"What's with the third degree?"

Photos in thesis.

She really gave him the third degree.

Background:

My dad recently retired and has since gotten a new favorite joke that he tells everyone who calls to congratulate him with his retirement.

The pun doesn't really work in english(I'm danish), but I thought I would share it anyway. This is how it usually goes:

Caller: How are you holding up? are you enjoying your spare time?

Dad: I actually just started my pHD

Caller: What? Wow

Dad: Pensioner every day

(In danish It would be: P entionist h ver d ag, hence the PhD)

It's not funny at all, but he loves it and tells it to everyone

Outstanding in his field.

A Doctopuss.

Dad: Are you thinking of doing a PhD?

Me: pffffffft

Dad: oh is that how it's pronounced

Because no matter the amount of proof his work remained a mere Hippo Thesis.

Watching The Strain when the doctors start doing an autopsy on a vampire body

Sister: So the vampire virus destroys all of the hosts organs?

Me: No it just changes them into different organs.

Dad: Yeah, they're... disorganized!

Laughter ensues

Turns out she's just a spin doctor.

He said it has its pluses and minuses.

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jokes on phd students

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PhD Memes About Research Life | High Impact PhD memes

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Explore the world of “High Impact PhD Memes,” where humor meets academia. This collection of memes delves into the unique challenges and relatable moments of the PhD journey. From battling writer’s block to celebrating small victories, these memes capture the essence of research life. Join fellow doctoral candidates in sharing a laugh and finding solace in shared experiences. Get ready to dive into the comical side of academia!

Check this impact meme, interesting and funny PhD memes about research life from iLovePhD Memes Facebook Page

This is how I Run my PhD Life with Research Problems and Life Problems

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Research Gap Identified

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A Night Before Thesis Defense

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When My Supervisor Shouts At Me

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Position to Read Article in PDF

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References and Review Paper

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I heard he’s doing PhD in stress management

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How deadlines chsing me

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Motivation During First and Final year of the PhD

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Can you Proof Read my Article

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Cofee with First Publication Motivate a lot

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Ph.D. Couple Goals | We Love PhD

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Forget Princess I Want to be a Scientist – PhD Memes

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Difference between First and Fifth year in LAB

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PhD Scholar after Thesis Defence

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Graphical Abstract vs. Abstract – PhD Memes

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Welcome to PhD – Memes

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When you notice people reading your research work but no one citing it.

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Where is the novelty

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PhD advisor before and after PhD admission

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What if someone had published your idea

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Eat and Innovate

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Difference between Theory and Practice

Difference between Theory and Practice

Procrastination to write a research paper

jokes on phd students

Advisor with new project ideas

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What I am doing in Life | Why I joined PhD

jokes on phd students

Show the difference between existing vs proposed work

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Before deadline vs after deadline

iLovePhD Memes

When your experiment gives outstanding result but you don’t know how

iLovePhD Memes

The idea of graduating and having to write my thesis

iLovePhD Memes

When scholar says he/she will submit manuscript draft tomorrow, but it’s been 6 months now

jokes on phd students

When everything is going wring in your life but you’re used to it

jokes on phd students

Study vs Stress Meme

iLovePhD Memes

Lab on Sunday

iLovePhD Memes

When you start thinking about your research during dinner

ilovephd memes

“High Impact PhD Memes” offers a humorous and relatable glimpse into the world of research and academia. These memes resonate with the experiences of doctoral candidates, highlighting the challenges, victories, and moments of camaraderie that define the PhD journey. As we explore this collection, it becomes evident that humor can be a powerful tool for coping with the rigors of research life. So, whether you’re in the midst of your own PhD adventure or simply curious about the world of academia, these memes provide a lighthearted and insightful perspective that brings a smile to your face and a sense of connection to the scholarly community.

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Six Effective Tips to Identify Research Gap

24 best free plagiarism checkers in 2024, how to check scopus indexed journals 2024, leave a reply cancel reply, most popular, types of research variable in research with example, what is hypothesis in research types, examples, & importance, how to write a research paper a complete guide, 14 websites to download research paper for free – 2024, google phd $50000 fellowship program 2024, phd funding schemes in india 2024, how does gptzero work ai detector for chatgpt / gemini / copilot / meta ai, best for you, what is phd, popular posts, 480 ugc-care list of journals – science – 2024, popular category.

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iLovePhD is a research education website to know updated research-related information. It helps researchers to find top journals for publishing research articles and get an easy manual for research tools. The main aim of this website is to help Ph.D. scholars who are working in various domains to get more valuable ideas to carry out their research. Learn the current groundbreaking research activities around the world, love the process of getting a Ph.D.

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  • 12 May 2021

The 100 memes that immortalize my PhD defence

  • Sophie Dufour-Beauséjour 0

Sophie Dufour-Beauséjour works as a policy analyst for the Government of Canada’s Climate Change Preparedness in the North Program.

You can also search for this author in PubMed   Google Scholar

I finished my PhD on sea-ice dynamics in Nunavik, an Inuit territory in the Canadian Arctic, during the pandemic. My defence took place on 30 October 2020, over Zoom.

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doi: https://doi.org/10.1038/d41586-021-01273-8

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Thirty PhD Memes For The Grad Student Who's Checked The Eff Out

Grad school is no joke; you're stressed out all the damn time and you can't catch any sort of break ever. But if you do in fact find yourself with a fleeting moment to take a break, we think you'll like scrolling through these relatable memes for anyone in the thick of finishing up their PhD.

If you want to feel even more angry about your academic woes, click here for more grad school memes!

Text - Grace Mallon @GraceMallon3 PhD student, c.2020: Here's a limited argument I made based on years of specialized research. Hope it's OK O Philosopher dude, c.1770: Here are some Thoughts I had in the Bath. They constitute Universal & Self-Evident Laws of Nature. FIGHT ME. 6:02 AM · 2/3/20 · Twitter Web App 17.9K Retweets 104K Likes

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17 Hilarious And Real Tweets For PhD Students

Ask me how my thesis is going one more time.

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Academia Obscura @AcademiaObscura How it feels to be a first year PhD student. 08:30 AM - 29 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
Owl Meat @Owl_Meat Reason to do a PhD #19: woman having baby on plane "Is there a Dr on board" Me: yes lol *gets out laptop and loads up MATLAB* #phdchat 06:20 PM - 04 Aug 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
Big Lore @HapaxLegoman impostor syndrome is real 12:23 PM - 20 Oct 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
Matthew Hankins @mc_hankins - Article please - Abstract? - No, article - HTML? - No, PDF - Weird PDF? - No, PDF - PDF in browser? - No, PDF - Download PDF? - Yes - OK 08:37 AM - 16 Feb 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
Grad Girl Problems @gradgirlprobs Me in office hours today 07:26 PM - 20 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
Dustin Lang @dstndstn "Congratulate [colleague] on a 3-year work anniversary as a postdoc." Oh LinkedIn, you do not understand how academia works 07:15 PM - 17 Dec 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
Tomas Petricek @tomaspetricek Making silly #latex jokes is much more fun than doing final tweaks in my thesis on #coeffects... 05:00 PM - 11 May 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
paperwash© @PaperWash Our Ideal candidate: -Minimum 3,000 years exp. -Must have 8 PhD's -Speak Klingon 80 hrs a week $7.15 an hour Must be passionate about work! 04:04 PM - 10 Jan 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite
ibid @ibid78 "Your résume says you spent 4 years in England. What were you doing?" *flashback to me trying to find the actual Hogwarts* "Grad school." 03:34 AM - 18 Nov 2014 Reply Retweet Favorite
Academia Obscura @AcademiaObscura Oh you have a PhD, how nice. Just put your CV in this "collection box". 09:15 AM - 26 Nov 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
void baby @poemsaredumb exclusive new pictures of me writing my thesis 02:04 AM - 06 Jul 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
PHD Comics @PHDcomics Let's be honest. https://t.co/M9oDlm2v22 #tbt 03:31 PM - 24 May 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
Katherine McDonald @Katherine_McDon Acknowledgements strike again. 07:28 AM - 03 Feb 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
Jamie Woodham @jwoodham People are always impressed to hear that I graduated from Harvard at 16, but you can do anything you set your mind to if you just lie. 02:17 AM - 03 Jan 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
Lauren SheDevil @DameSavage77 Paparazzi shot of me submitting my thesis just moments ago. #PhD #PhDChat #ItsOver 10:44 AM - 01 May 2015 Reply Retweet Favorite
Marianne Brooker @curiousvolumes Model for PhD chapter outline 11:53 AM - 26 May 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite
Ethicist For Hire @ethicistforhire When you enter grad school. When you leave grad school... #GameofThrones 11:39 PM - 27 Jun 2016 Reply Retweet Favorite

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ThePhDHub

Top PhD memes of 2021 (Updated)

The era is of the internet. People are passing their time on the internet, blog, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter. Memes are evolved recently. It is a pictorial representation of a joke. And people love memes.

Our social media is flooded with jokes, memes and gifs. Here in the present article, we have enlisted some of the meme material related to PhD. PhD is a very serious business, still, some of the memes are incredible and describe some of the common problems everyone faces during their PhD time.

jokes on phd students

See this What a PhD student feel on Friday when everyone is planning to party!

jokes on phd students

This meme is best understood by those who are still struggling to write their research paper.

jokes on phd students

A cold-blooded insult to a PhD student.

jokes on phd students

This story is for those who have actually mastered a skill to describe their research like no one other did do it.

jokes on phd students

This one is actually exciting.

jokes on phd students

Another next level of insult to us (PhDs).

jokes on phd students

This happens to everyone. By reading a few papers we think we know everything.

jokes on phd students

Dr. Tushar Chauhan is a Scientist, Blogger and Scientific-writer. He has completed PhD in Genetics. Dr. Chauhan is a PhD coach and tutor.

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What is an Honorary Doctorate or honorary PhD?

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Graduate Student Jokes

What does a graduate student with a science degree ask "why does it work" what does a graduate student with an engineering degree ask "how does it work" what does a graduate student with an accounting degree ask "how much will it cost", a professor asks a graduate student what he's working on these days., a graduate student submits his thesis to his advisor..., an economics graduate student crosses the road..

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A graduate student in psychology

She yells, "no, i won't sleep with you tonight, you pig", how many graduate students does it take to change a light bulb, "hey, graduate student minotaur, what are you up to today", who is a graduate student's least favorite greek hero, nobel prize winner is dying (long), i don't understand why people think that an animation graduate student would not be able to get a job. well i'm here to tell them they're wrong. i'm working i'm doing my job making many kids happy..., [long]a theoretical physicist is working diligently in his office at columbia university..

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jokes on phd students

JokoJokes Funny Jokes

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77 phd jokes and hilarious phd puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about phd that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article contains hilarious jokes related to PHD. It includes bad PHD quotes from professors. Read to re-discover commonly used PHD acronyms like 'Pay Huge Dollars' and 'Push Harder, Dude'. Moreover, jokes related to economics, professors, and other research fields are also featured. Enjoy the funniest pieces of PHD-related humour!

Quick Jump To

  • Short Phd Jokes

Phd One Liners

Phd degree jokes, earned phd jokes.

  • More Phd Jokes

Funniest Phd Short Jokes

Short phd jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The phd humour may include short economics jokes also.

  • My nerdy friend just got a PhD on the history of palindromes. We now call him Dr. Awkward.
  • My friend told me, You have a Bachelor's, a Master's, and a Ph.D., but you still act like an idiot. That was a third degree burn.
  • but I have a PhD... "Here's a broom go and sweep the floors." "But I have a PhD..." "Oh sorry, give me the broom, I'll show you how its done."
  • What did the philosophy Ph.D say to the fat black woman? Welcome to McDonalds. May I take your order?
  • What do you call someone who does a BA in Arts, a MA in English and a PhD in Gender Studies? A well educated Barista
  • I've been doing my psychology PhD thesis on the mental health and wellbeing of little people. After 4 long years and multiple studies, I've concluded... 6 out of 7 dwarves aren't Happy.
  • To the woman I met in the bar last night who was mad at me this morning I never said I had a PhD in theoretical physics. I said I had a theoretical PhD in physics.
  • My friend said: You have a BA, a Masters and a PhD, but you still act like an idiot… It was a third degree burn.
  • A father has 4 sons in his house. 3 have a PhD, but one is a robber. Why won't he kick out the robber? Because he's the only one making money
  • "Here's a broom go and sweep the floors." "But I have a PhD..." "Oh sorry, give me the broom, I'll show you how its done."

Share These Phd Jokes With Friends

Which phd one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with phd? I can suggest the ones about professor and prof.

  • My nerdy friend got a Ph.D on the History of palindrome . He's now Dr.Awkward.
  • Why are black people unable to get a PhD? Because they can't get past their masters
  • I recently received my PhD in palindromes. I now go by Dr. Awkward
  • So my crush wants a guy with a phd And apparently that doesn't mean pretty huge debt
  • What do call a fish with a Phd? A brain sturgeon.
  • I'm like Dr. Strange without the PHD and magic cape. Strange...
  • What did Dr. pepper earn his PhD in? Fizz-ics
  • I asked my Indian father for a PS3 He said "No beta, it's pronounced PH.D."
  • I have a phd A pretty huge...
  • What does Dr. Pepper have his PhD in? Theoretical fizz-ics.
  • Why couldn't the black man get a PhD? He couldn't get past his masters.
  • Which field of study does Dr. Pepper have his PhD in? Fizzy-ology.
  • So, you are watching a Christopher Nolan movie? Do you even have a PhD?
  • My Starbucks barista thinks he's so smart just because he has a PhD in humanities.
  • What is Doctor Pepper's PhD in? Particle Fizzics.

Here is a list of funny phd degree jokes and even better phd degree puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • My friend said, You have a B.A., Master's, and a Ph.D., but you still act like an complete idiot. It was a third degree burn.
  • How come there are only PHD and bachelor's degrees in Czechia? Because they have No Gods, No Masters.
  • My friend said, You have a B.A., Master's, and a Ph.D, but you still act like a m**.... It was a third degree burn.
  • Who called it phd and not 3rd degree t**...?

Here is a list of funny earned phd jokes and even better earned phd puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • How many millennials does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 100 99 to earn a PhD in electrical engineering and interview for the job, and one to agree to do it for the "experience".
  • Did you hear about the man who earned his PhD in well drilling? He was well educated.

Related Comedy Topics

  • mathematics
  • theoretical

Unearthly Funniest Phd Jokes to Tickle Your Sides

What funny jokes about phd you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean university jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make phd pranks.

Two drunk people are sitting at a bar having an argument about Coronavirus.

The first one says "You're just trying to scare people. You don't know anything." The second replies, clearly fed up with the first, "I'm a doctor! I'm paid to know these things, I have a PhD and everything!" The first one slurs back, "Well ***I*** have a ***DhD.***" The second says, exasperated, "What the h**... is a DhD??" The first cackles, "You're some doc if you don't know what ADHD is!"

"My first son has a PHD in arts, my daughter has two degrees in communication and jornalism and my youngest son is a burglar."

Friend: "Wow a burglar? You should kick him out!" Dad: "Nah... he is the only one who makes money."

My career's in ruins!

A man walks into a bar and finds its patrons raucously celebrating with a young man standing on the bar shouting for more drinks, on him. He walks up to the bar and shouts to the young man, What's the occasion? My career's in ruins! the lad cackles. The man, shocked, replies, Then why the h**... are you celebrating? I've just completed my PhD in archaeology!

Why God never got a PhD

1. He had only one major publication. 2. It was written in Aramaic, not in English. 3. It has no references. 4. It wasn't even published in a refereed journal. 5. There are serious doubts he wrote it himself. 6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then? 7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited. 8. The Scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results. 9. He unlawfully performed not only Animal, but *Human* testing. 10. When one experiment went awry, he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects. 11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample. 12. He rarely came to class, just told his students to read the book. 13. Some say he had his son to teach the class. 14. He expelled his first two students for learning. 15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests. 16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.

What's the difference between a jungle cat who wrote his PhD thesis on the economic effects of taxation, and the order of insects that includes butterflies and moths?

One's a leopard doctor of tax economy, the other's a lepidopteral taxonomy

So, I have this friend who studied to become an egyptologist

The only way he can make a living is by becoming a PhD and teach others to become egyptologists. As far as I'm concerned, it is a pyramid scheme.

An Asian kid asks his mom

Mom, what does an Apple a day keeps the doctors away mean? Mom says, ah, my dear son, it means that if you play games on your Apple phone everyday, you will never get your PhD

Did you hear about the p**... with a PhD in Psychology?

She'll blow your mind.

Due to the size of my student loans for my phd I have debts no honest man could pay....

Luckily I'm a statistician.

A dishonest college graduate wrote PhD on his transcript

I guess you could say he doctored it

My brother just finished his doctorals

So he went to Starbucks to celebrate. The cashier said. "What would you like sir?" "I would like an espresso please" my brother replied. "Okay sir, I just need your name." The cashier said. "It's Stephen" My brother replied. "With a 'ph'?" The cashier asked. My brother then replied. "No, it's Stephen, with a PhD"

Did you know that Brian May, the guitarist from British rockband Queen, has a PhD on Astrophysics?

Yeah, he started his schooling before Queen formed, and achieved his PhD in 2007. One of his dissertations is heavily criticized by the science community though, and it's because he has an odd theory of what causes the Earth's rotation. You see, he thinks that 'Fat Bottomed Girls make the Rockin World go round.'

My PhD student claims to have made a breakthrough in hyperbolic mathematics

Turns out he was just exaggerating

After working long and hard for my PhD people finally recognize me..

As the neighborhood pizza Hut delivery guy now.

Become a PhD

After many years of studying at a university, I've finally become a PhD… or Pizza Hut Deliveryman as people call it.

A friend of mine is really set on becoming the first emperor of Asia, He's pursuing a PhD in English Literature...

When I asked him why chose English Literature he said he wanted to be "a great reader".

I'm starting a charity for PhD students so they can finally afford to live on their own without the need for roommates...

It's called "Doctors without Boarders."

I once held a PHD in the field of literature

And then he asked me to put him down and pick up all the books I threw all over the grass

Educated Sons

1st son : Degree in Economics. 2nd son: MBA. 3rd son : PhD 4th son : Thief Neighbour: Why can't you throw the 4th son out of your house? Father : He is the only one earning money. The rest are unemployed.

I've decided to get a PhD in how much soda you should have for the end of the world.

Dr. Prepper, at your service.

An awkward friend of mine just finished his PhD in palindrome theory..

Now he's Dr. Awkward.

A nerdy friend of mine just got his Ph.D. on the history of palindromes.

He is now Dr. Awkward.

Where did the microbiologist go after receiving his PhD?

...to a cell-laboratory gathering

I tell my dates I have a PhD in s**... talk.

They are not as impressed when learning my dissertation was on the "effects of female ultrasonic vocalization on male impotence in rats"

My friend has a PhD in s**... deviancy

She can talk about a**... asphyxiation until she's blue in the face!

My friend has a PHD.

Even though he only has a Public Highschool Diploma, he has been living a pretty happy life. Side note: My father loves to make this joke, so I had to share.

there was a suspicion of university diploma forgery

There was a suspicion of university diploma forgery. The police went to investigate that. "There was no proof that any crime was commited," said the police officer, John Brown J.D., M.D., B.D., Ph.D.

How do you make a venetian blind?

Poke his eyes out Credits go to my 90 year old grandfather, currently completing his PhD

jokes about phd

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75 Hilarious Jokes About Graduation That Will Make Your Commencement Day Even Better

Hey there, are you feeling the countdown to graduation day yet? That mix of excitement and nerves as you prepare for a big milestone can be pretty overwhelming. But don’t sweat it! As someone who recently graduated myself, I totally get where you’re coming from. And guess what? I’ve got just the thing to make your commencement day even more unforgettable: 75 side-splitting jokes about graduation.

In this article, we’ll take a deep dive into all kinds of humor – from silly dad jokes to clever one-liners that will have everyone in stitches. We know graduations can drag on forever, but armed with these witty quips, you’ll sail through the whole shebang like a pro. So sit back and relax as we celebrate the end of one journey and the beginning of another – with lots of laughter along the way!

List of Jokes About Graduation

jokes about graduation

1. Why did the scarecrow graduate from college? Because he was outstanding in his field! 2. What do you call a bookworm who graduates? A wise-cracker! 3. Why did the math book always graduate summa cum laude? Because it had so many problems solved! 4. Why did the computer graduate early? It had a lot of byte! 5. What do you say to a graduate who can’t find a job? “You’ll make a great barista!” 6. Why was the math book sad after graduation? It had too many imaginary friends! 7. What did the pencil say to the graduating student? “You made your mark!” 8. Why did the biology student graduate with honors? Because they kept their plants alive! 9. What did the graduate tomato say to the other tomato? “Catch you later! We’re both ripe for success!” 10. How do you know the diploma was well-behaved? It never got a single detention! 11. What’s the smartest type of wood? Grad-wood, because it’s always making the grade! 12. Why did the musician graduate early? They had perfect “note”-tendance! 13. How did the graduate astronaut throw a graduation party in space? They planned a “universal” celebration! 14. Why was the computer science major a great poet? They had a way with code! 15. What did the film student say after graduation? “That’s a wrap!” 16. How did the graduate volcano celebrate? It had an “erupt-ious” party! 17. Why was the book so proud of its graduation? It finally found its “cliff”-notes! 18. What do you call a graduate who becomes a chef? A culinary “master’s”! 19. How did the graduate frog celebrate? They hopped for joy! 20. Why was the graduate cellist always calm? They had great “cello-control”!

jokes about graduation

21. How did the graduate bee celebrate? With a “buzz”-worthy graduation party! 22. Why did the psychology student graduate early? They analyzed all the “classics”! 23. What did the light bulb say to the graduating student? “You brightened up the class!” 24. How did the graduate tree celebrate? It put on its “cap” and branches! 25. Why did the archaeology student throw a graduation party? They finally found their “sense” of accomplishment! 26. What did the ocean say to the graduating student? “Seas the day and make a splash in the world!” 27. How did the graduate duck celebrate? With a “quack”-tacular graduation ceremony! 28. Why did the graduate squirrel become a comedian? They had lots of “acorn”-y jokes! 29. What did the graduate kangaroo say to the other kangaroo? “Hoppy graduation!” 30. How did the graduate firework celebrate? It went out with a “bang”! 31. Why did the graduate bee receive a standing ovation? They were always “on fleek”! 32. What did the book say to the graduating student? “You’ve reached the final chapter!” 33. How did the graduate spider celebrate? By spinning a web of success! 34. Why was the graduate giraffe so popular? They always stood tall in their achievements! 35. What did the clock say to the graduating student? “It’s about time you graduated!” 36. How did the graduate squirrel celebrate? They climbed to new heights of success! 37. Why did the coffee cup congratulate the graduating student? They were brewing with success! 38. What do you call a graduate who loves gardening? A “bloom”-ing success! 39. How did the graduate snail celebrate? They took their time and enjoyed the journey! 40. Why did the chef graduate with honors? They had a “flour”-ishing career ahead!

jokes about graduation

41. What did the calculator say to the graduating student? “You can always count on me!” 42. How did the graduate monkey celebrate? They went bananas with joy! 43. Why was the graduate cat always purring? They had a degree in contentment! 44. What did the balloon say to the graduating student? “Soar high and reach for the sky!” 45. How did the graduate dolphin celebrate? They made a big splash with their achievements! 46. Why was the graduate owl considered wise? They aced all their exams with “owl”-standing grades! 47. What did the road say to the graduating student? “Congratulations on paving your way to success!” 48. How did the graduate lion celebrate? They roared with pride! 49. Why did the graduate fox become a detective? They were always sly-solving mysteries! 50. What did the basketball say to the graduating student? “You scored big in academics!” 51. How did the graduate elephant celebrate? With a trunk-ful of achievements! 52. Why was the graduate dolphin always smiling? They had a “fin”-tastic future ahead! 53. What did the smartphone say to the graduating student? “You’ve unlocked the key to success!” 54. How did the graduate horse celebrate? They galloped into a bright future! 55. Why did the graduate sheep become a musician? They always had a great “baa”-seline rhythm! 56. What did the mountain say to the graduating student? “You’ve reached the peak of success!” 57. How did the graduate owl celebrate? They stayed up all night to hoot their success! 58. Why did the graduate horse receive a standing ovation? They had a track record of excellence! 59. What did the cactus say to the graduating student? “Stick to your dreams and grow!” 60. How did the graduate penguin celebrate? They danced with delight on the ice!

jokes about graduation

61. Why did the graduate zebra become a referee? They always knew how to make the right “stripe” decisions! 62. What did the mirror say to the graduating student? “Reflect on your accomplishments and shine!” 63. How did the graduate pig celebrate? They had a “ham”-azing graduation feast! 64. Why did the graduate monkey join the circus? They were always “ape”-t at performing! 65. What did the flower say to the graduating student? “Blossom into greatness!” 66. How did the graduate lion celebrate? They ruled the kingdom of success! 67. Why did the graduate kangaroo become a teacher? They loved to “bounce” knowledge to others! 68. What did the telescope say to the graduating student? “You’ve reached for the stars and achieved greatness!” 69. How did the graduate penguin celebrate? They slid into the future with joy! 70. Why did the graduate elephant become an artist? They had a brush with success! 71. What did the GPS say to the graduating student? “You’ve reached your destination: success!” 72. How did the graduate giraffe celebrate? They stretched their neck out for a bright future! 73. Why did the graduate parrot become a public speaker? They had a way with words! 74. What did the flag say to the graduating student? “Wave your success proudly!” 75. How did the graduate turtle celebrate? Slowly and steadily, they crossed the finish line of success!

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180 Jokes for the Classroom

  • Christopher Olson
  • August 31, 2021
  • No Comments

Knock, Knock!?  (Who’s there?)  Jokes!  (Jokes who?)  180 JOKES FOR THE CLASSROOM THAT’S WHO!

Alright, so I promise the following 180 jokes are WAY BETTER than that.  I mean, would you even call that a joke?  I digress…  so where did this idea come from to compile this major list of jokes?  Teaching during the pandemic. I was teaching completely virtual for almost the entire school year.  I had to find a way to motivate my students and keep them engaged and smiling when they signed on every morning.  What better way than to have an entire “joke month” with a joke of the day.  We called it “Joke January!”

jokes on phd students

I created google slides with my jokes and Bitmoji characters in various funny positions.  Also, to make it even more engaging and exciting I had a student assigned each day to tell a joke as well!  I even made a point to include several of their jokes within this list!  My plan for this upcoming school year is to do an entire year’s worth of jokes!

Here is my plan for the upcoming school year: When the jokes are presented to my students on the slide,  I will provide time for students to read the joke on their own first.  Some days I have them pair and share what they think the answer may be.  Or, I will complete it whole group with several students taking guesses before providing the answer.  I hope this will start the day with a smile!

jokes on phd students

A huge thank you to several of my former students for some of these hilarious jokes!  Also, a big thank you to the Teaching Trailblazers in our Fearless Kindergarten Facebook Group , Fearless First Grade Facebook Group , and Fearless Second Grade Facebook Group for funny jokes in the classroom!   Sit back, relax and enjoy these 180 Jokes for the Classroom!  I can’t stop laughing at the Cow and Dinosaur sections!

1 – Which school supply is the king of the classroom?

          The ruler

2 – What runs around the yard (or playground) all day, but never gets tired?

          The fence.     ~ Peggy H. 

3 – Why did the teacher have to wear sunglasses?

          her students were so bright.     ~ anita c. .

4 – What is a snake’s favorite subject?

         Hisssssstory

Joke 5 – Why did the crayon cry?

         He was feeling blue.

6 – Where do pencils go on vacation?

         Pennsylvania     ~ Carrie B. 

7 – Why did the dog do so well in school?

         Because he was the teacher’s pet! 

8 – Why did the kid cross the playground?

          to get to the other slide..

9 – How do bee parents send their little bees to school?

          They go by school buzz.

Joke 10 – Why was the broom late for school?

          It overswept!

Even MORE School Jokes

11 – How do you get Pikachu on the bus? 

          You Poke-e-mon (poke him on).     ~ Cherie M. 

12 – What do elves do after school?

          GNOME-work

13 – What is a cat’s favorite color crayon?

          ”Purr”ple

14 – I just can’t remember all the letters of the alphabet…

           i don’t know why     ~ steve t. .

Joke 15 – What flies around the kindergarten room at night?

          The alpha-BAT.

16 – What’s the difference between a teacher and a train?

          A teacher says, “Spit out that gum!” and a train says, “Chew! Chew!”

17 – What did the paper say to the pencil?  

          You have a good point!     ~Serina W. 

18 – Why was the music teacher stuck outside his classroom?

          Because his keys were on the piano!

19 – What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?

          Supplies!

Joke 20 – Why did the students eat their homework?

          because the teacher told them that it was a piece of cake..

21 – Did I tell you the joke about the broken pencil?

          Response: no

          Well, there’s no point.     ~ Serina W. 

22 – What are ten things you can always count on?

          Your fingers!

23 – What do you call a hen who counts her own eggs?

          A mathemachicken.        ~ Kelly R.

24 – What did the circle say to the triangle?

          i don’t see your point..

Joke 25 – What was the banker’s favorite player on the football team?

          The quarterback.

26 – What did 50 do when she got hungry?

          58     ~ Anna W. 

27 – Why is a math book always unhappy?

          Because it always has lots of problems.

28 – What is a mathematician’s favorite day of the week? 

          Tuesday, because it has a “number” in it. TWOsday.     ~ Letitia B. 

29 – How do you make seven an even number?

          by removing the ‘s’.

Joke 30 – When is it time to go to the dentist?

          Two-thirty! (Tooth-hurty).     ~ Julie B. 

31 – What has hands but can’t clap?

          A clock!

32 – Why is 6 afraid of 7? 

          Because 7-8(ate)-9     ~ Tenna T.

33 – There’s a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. 

          Only a fraction of you will get this.

34 – What did the 0 say to the 8? 

          Nice belt!     ~ Sherie T.  

jokes on phd students

Joke 35 – Which tool do you use for math?

          multipliers.

36 – What happened when 50 ran a race?

          51     ~ Anna W. 

37 – What did one penny say to the other penny? 

          We make cents!  

38 – What do you call an empty parrot cage?           A polygon.

39 – What’s a tornado’s favorite game to play?

          Twister. 

jokes on phd students

Joke 40 – What does the cloud put on before the storm? 

          Thunderpants.     ~ Michele J. 

41 – Why is the moon like a dollar?

          Because it has four quarters

42 – How does a scientist freshen his breath?

          with experi-mints.

43 – What kind of flower grows between your nose and your chin?

          Two lips     ~ Candice W. 

44 – Which planet is the noisiest?

          Saturn, because it has so many rings!

Joke 45 – What is a vampire’s favorite fruit? 

          A neck-terine     ~ Sandy P.

46 – What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?

          spelling.

47 – What is a ghost’s favorite pie?

          Boo berry pie     ~ Peggy H. 

48 – What do Italian ghosts have for dinner?

          Spook-hetti!

49 – Where do monsters get an education?

          In ghoul school!

Thanksgiving 

Joke 50 – why did the turkey join a band,           so he could use his drumsticks.

51 – If April showers bring May flowers what do May flowers bring? 

          Pilgrims!     ~ Judy R. 

Winter/Christmas

52 – What did one snowman say to the other snowman?

          I smell carrots.     ~ Deborah P. 

53 – What do you get if you cross a vampire and a snowman?

          Frostbite

jokes on phd students

54 – What do elves learn in school?

          the elf-abet.

Joke 55 – What often falls in winter, but never gets hurt?           Snow

56 – What type of Mexican food do snowmen like?

         Brrrrrr-itos!

57 – What is a snowman’s favorite drink?

          Ice Tea

58 – What treat should you make for the Snowman Holiday Party?

          Ice Krispy Treats

59 – What do they sell at McDonald’s at the North Pole?

          brrrrrrr-gers  .

Joke 60 – What does Santa do at football games?

          He gives a little cheer!

Valentine’s Day

61 – What kind of flower do you never want to get on Valentine’s Day? 

          Cauliflower

62 – What do you call two birds in love? 

          Tweet-hearts

63 – What did the calculator say to the other calculator on Valentine’s Day?

          let me count the ways i love you..

64 – What is a frog’s favorite drink? 

          Croak-a-cola.     ~ Jennifer M. 

Joke 65 – What do you give a sick lemon?

          Lemon-aid.

66 – What do you call a sad strawberry?

          A blueberry

67 – Why did the banana go to the Doctor?

          Because it wasn’t peeling well!

68 – What do you call a fake noodle?

          an im-pasta     ~ heather g. .

69 – Why did the banana go to the hospital?

          He was peeling really bad.

Joke 70 – What day of the week does the potato look forward to the least?

          Fry-day

71 – What do you call cheese that doesn’t belong to you?

          Nacho cheese!     ~ Callea J. 

72 – Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?

          Because it lost its filling!

73 – What do you call a bear with no teeth? 

          A gummy bear!     ~ Susan R. 

74 – Why do eggs hate jokes?

          because they crack up..

Joke 75 – What are twins’ favorite fruit?

          Pears

76 – What did Mr. and Mrs. Hamburger name their daughter?

          Patty!

77 – Why did the cookie go to the doctor? 

          Because he felt “crumby”     ~ Nicole O. 

78 – When potatoes have babies, what are they called?

          Tator Tots 

79 – Where do hamburgers go to dance?

          They go to the meat-ball!

Joke 80 – Why did the elephant cross the road?

          Because it was the chicken’s day off

81 – What do a car and an elephant have in common?

          they both have trunks..

82 – What color of socks do bears wear? 

          They don’t wear socks… they have bear feet (bare feet)!     ~ Jenny D. 

83 – How does a penguin build a house?

          Igloos it together!     ~ GiAnna D. 

84 – Two giraffes run a race. 

          They are neck and neck.     ~ Rachel W. 

Joke 85 – What’s the best day for monkey business?

          The first of Ape-ril!

jokes on phd students

86 – What do you call bears with no ears?

          b .

87 – What nickname do you keep for a monkey selling potato chips?

          You can call them a chipmunk!

88 – Why can’t a cheetah play hide and seek?

          Because he’s always spotted

89 – What did the buffalo say when his son went to school?

          Bison!

Joke 90 – What do you call a camel with no humps? 

          Humphrey     ~ Marion L. 

91 – What do monkey cooks wear when they are working in the kitchen?

          They wear the Ape-rons

jokes on phd students

92 – What do you call an alligator in a vest?

          an investigator.

93 – What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine?

          A slowpoke.

94 – Which animal cheats in the exams?

          CHEATah     ~ Jaxon W.

Joke 95 – Which animal is white, black, and red all over the body?

          A little sunburnt penguin!

96 – What movies do pandas enjoy watching the most?

          They love watching the old movies because the movies are black and white!

Farm Animals

97 – What’s a rabbit’s favorite kind of music?

          Hip-hop.

98 – What did the duck say after she bought Chapstick? 

          put it on my bill     ~ marcia g. .

99 – What do you call a horse that lives next door?

          Neigh-bor!

Joke 100 – What’s a frog’s favorite game?

          Hopscotch

101 – Why did the bee get married?? 

          He found his honey!     ~ Stacy P. 

102 – How do you get a mouse to smile?

          Say cheese!

103 – What’s the smartest insect around?

          The spelling bee.

104 -What do pigs get when they’re sick? 

Joke 105 – Where do sheep get a haircut?

          at the baa-baa shop, more animal jokes.

106 – What type of dog loves going to the groomer?

          A shampoodle

107 – What did the duck say to the clown?

          You quack me up

108 – What did one firefly say to the other?

          You glow, girl!

109 – What is a cat’s most favorite magazine?

          It is a CAT-alogue.

Joke 110 – Why couldn’t the pony sing in the choir?

          Because she was a little horse

111 – Where do dogs park their cars?

          in a barking lot..

112 – What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?

          A labracadabrador.

113 – What do you call a pig that does karate?

          A pork chop

114 – There are ten cats standing on a boat. One cat jumps off the boat, how many more cats are left?

          None, because the cats were all copy cats

Joke 115 – What’s a cat’s favorite nursery rhyme?

          Three Blind Mice

116 – What did the cat say when someone stepped on its tail?

          me-ow.

117 – Why are frogs always so happy?

          They eat whatever bugs them.

118 – What do you call a cow with no legs? 

          Ground beef.     ~ Julie M. 

119 – What do you call a cow in an earthquake?

          A milkshake!     ~ Isaac G. 

Joke 120 – Where do cows go on the weekend?

          to the moo-vies.

121 – How can you tell which cow is the best dancer?

          You can select the cow that has the best “mooooooooves”!

122 – What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

          A lawn moo-er!

123 – What does the secret agent cow say to the other agent cow before a mission?

          He says, “Are you going ‘udder cover’?”

124 – Why did the cow cross the road?

          To get to the udder side!

Joke 125 – What do you call a sleeping cow?           A bulldozer!

126 – What kind of dinosaur loves to sleep?

          A Stega-SNORE-us!  

127 – What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?

          Dino-SNORE     ~ Ila C. 

128 – What do you call a blind dinosaur?

          do-you-think-he-saur-us.

129 – What dinosaur should never drive a car? 

          Tyrannosaurus Wrecks!     ~ Miranda T. 

Joke 130 – When dinosaurs keep scoring touchdowns, what does its team get?

          The team will keep getting dino-scores! 

131 – When building a house, what tool do dinosaurs use the most?

          They frequently use a dino-saw

132 – What animal will you get if you combine a dog and a dino?

          you will get a dog-a-sore.

133 – How does the solar system throw a party? 

          THEY PLANET     ~ Tanner P. 

134 – Why did Mickey Mouse become an astronaut?

          So he could visit Pluto!

Joke 135 – Where do astronauts keep their wallets?

          In air-pockets   

136 – What dance steps can cows do on the moon?

          the moooooooon walk.

137 – How did the cow jump over the moon?

          They followed the milky way. 

138 – When do student astronauts eat?

          During launch time!

Knock, Knock Jokes 

139 – Knock, knock. 

Who’s there? 

You’re welcome!

Joke 140 – Knock knock?

Who’s there?

Ummm…Orange who?

Orange you glad you’re in this class!     ~ Kathy S. 

141 – Knock, knock. 

Cows go who , no, silly, cows go moo.

142 – Knock knock.

Cleopatra. 

Cleopatra who? 

The queen of denial.     ~ Kristin P. 

143 – Knock, knock.

Car go… Vroom vroom!

144 – Knock-knock.

Justin who?

Oh, Justin time for a spelling test! 

Joke 145 – Knock knock

Smell mop who, ( you’ll get it if you say it out loud)     ~ marv s..

146 – What do you call a fish with no eye?

          A fsh

147 – Why are fish so smart?

          Because they are always in a school.

148 – What did the ocean say to the beach?

          Nothing, it just waved

149 – What do you get when you cross an elephant and a fish?

          you get a swimming trunk.

jokes on phd students

Joke 150 – What sharks always end up working in the construction site?

          Hammerhead sharks work there because they are the most useful one!

151 – How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh out loud?

          Ten-tickles!

152 – How can you tell the ocean is friendly?

          It waves!

153 – Why did the fisherman put peanut butter into the sea?

          to go with the jellyfish .

154 – What did they call the girl born at the beach?

          Sandy

Joke 155 – What do you get when you throw a lot of books into the ocean?

          A title wave

156 – Have you heard about the new pirate movie?

          It’s rated Arrrrrrrrrrr.     ~ Julie B. 

          Because they spend a lot of time at C.

158 – What did the Lego pirate say when he lost his leg? 

          Where did my Lego leg go?     ~ Brenda W. 

159 – How did the pirate get his flag so cheaply?

          he bought it on sail..

Joke 160 – How much do pirates pay for body parts? 

          A buck an ear     ~ Chanda T. 

161 – What did the pirate say when he turned 80?

          Aye matey!

Miscellaneous 

162 – Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the road?

          Because it got stuck in the crack!     ~ Amanda B. 

163 – What did the drummer name his twins? 

          anna one,           anna two     ~ kendra j. .

164 – What kind of tree fits in your hand?

          A palm tree

Joke 165 – Why did the computer sneeze?

          It had a virus.

166 – What has four wheels and flies?

          A garbage truck

167 – How do you make a tissue dance?

          Put a little “boogie” in it.     ~ Lisa K. 

168 – Why did the soccer player take so long to eat dinner?

          he thought he couldn’t use his hands.

169 – Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants? 

          In case he got a hole in one.     ~ Sheryl F. 

Joke 170 – What’s the loudest pet you can get?

          A trumpet!

Wait…There’s MORE!

171 – Why is dark spelled with a K and not a C?

          Because you can’t see in the dark.

172 – Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?

          Because she will Let It Go!     ~ Sue B. 

173 – What do you call a happy cowboy? 

          A jolly rancher.

174 – Why did the kids put sugar on their pillows?

          They wanted to have sweet dreams!     ~ Jenny D. 

Joke 175 – Why did the policeman go to the baseball game?

          He’d heard that someone had stolen a base!

176 – What kind of shoes do all spies wear?

          sneak-ers..

177 – Where did the king keep his armies? 

          In his sleevies.     ~ Mary B. 

178 – What musical instrument is found in the bathroom?

          A tube-a toothpaste.

179 – What did the little corn say to the mama corn?

          Where’s pop-corn?

Joke 180 – Why can’t you ever tell a joke around glass?           It could crack up.

jokes on phd students

So I hope, now that you read 180 Jokes for School, that your cheeks don’t hurt too much from laughing/smiling!  OR, more so, I really hope you didn’t roll your eyes too much!  What were some of your favorites on this list?  Do you think you are going to be like me and have a joke of the day this upcoming school year?   Let us know in the comments below!   Even better, add your own jokes below too!   Keep laughing and keep smiling!

Written by – Christopher Olson

At  Education to the Core , we exist to help our teachers build a stronger classroom as they connect with our community to find trusted, state-of-the-art resources designed by teachers for teachers. We aspire to be the world’s leading & most trusted community for educational resources for teachers. We improve the lives of every teacher and learner with the most comprehensive, reliable, and inclusive educational resources.

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40+ Hilarious Graduation Jokes to Make Grads Laugh

Graduation marks an educational milestone. It’s an emotional time of achievement and memories. Laugh with funny graduation jokes.

Graduation cap.

Whether high school or college, it takes hard work and dedication to graduate .

So, take a moment to celebrate your graduation with friends and family .

Many graduates reflect on memories of their time in school , as it’s a time of various emotions.

As you celebrate, laugh with the following graduation jokes.

They’re also perfect for speeches and sharing with other grads.

The best graduation jokes

1 . Is longitude or latitude smarter?

Longitude because it has 360 degrees.

2 . Why didn’t the married man get an undergraduate diploma?

He wasn’t a bachelor.

Diploma.

3 . What did the corn say to its kid after graduation?

Corn-gratulations!

4 . What did the dad call his daughter after graduating from law school?

His daughter in law.

5 . Which lab equipment is the smartest?

The graduated cylinder.

6 . Why do seniors sleep after graduation?

They’re preparing for their dream job.

7 . What happened to the bread at graduation?

It made it to the honor roll.

8 . Why didn’t the broom graduate?

It was sweeping in class.

9 . Why did the South American animal go to the graduation ceremony?

To get a dip-llama.

10 . What do you call a doctor that graduates at the bottom of their class?

11 . Why do graduation ceremonies get so hot?

There are so many degrees.

12 . What’s a college graduate’s favorite TV show?

The Walking Debt.

13 . Where does a tall person graduate?

At the top of their class.

14 . Why didn’t the skeleton go to graduation?

It had no body to walk with.

15 . From what school do ice cream makers graduate?

Sundae school.

16 . How does a cactus look in a graduation outfit?

17 . What do dogs get after graduation?

A pedigree.

18 . What does a light bulb say in a graduation speech?

You have a bright future.

19 . Why did schools stop graduation ceremonies?

There was too much name-calling.

Graduation cap and diploma.

20 . What happens to candy after graduating?

They become Smarties.

21 . What does a bat say during graduation?

Con-bat-ulations!

22 . What did the graduate say when his mom asked why he didn’t pick up his phone after graduation?

I couldn’t pick up because the reception was horrible.

23 . How did the baking graduate’s final exam go?

It was a piece of cake .

24 . Which faculty member is friends with all the graduates?

The princi-pal.

25 . What did the fashion designer say to his daughter at graduation?

I’m so Prada you.

26 . How many college students do you need to change a light bulb?

One, but it might take more than four years.

27 . What does a whale say during a graduation speech?

Congratulations, and whale done.

28 . What do students look better after graduation?

They get one degree hotter.

29 . What do graduates in Athens get?

30 . What did the tortilla say after graduation?

That’s a wrap.

31 . What did the graduate say after getting a Bachelor of Science?

I’m done with this B.S.

32 . Why did the speaker have to wear sunglasses while in front of the dean’s list?

They’re really bright.

33 . What do you say to cheese at graduation?

34 . Why do students learn sign language before graduating?

It comes in handy.

Person using sign language.

35 . Why did the high school graduate go to flight school?

To pursue higher education.

36 . What did the duck say to the graduate?

Con-quack-ulations.

37 . What does a cat say to its graduating class?

Con-cat-ulations.

38 . What’s a student’s status after graduation?

Unemployed.

39 . Why didn’t the sun want to graduate?

It already has millions of degrees.

40 . What do you call someone that takes twice as long to graduate?

A gradu-late.

41 . What did the dessert say after realizing it might be the last time it sees its school friends?

I donut want to graduate.

42 . What’s the number one reason graduation rates have increased?

The internet.

Related : Hilarious Harry Potter Jokes Every Potterhead Will Love

Featured image by David Em/Humor Living .

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Free printable Mother's Day questionnaire 💐!

75 Funny and Sweet School Jokes for Kids

Why are fish so smart?

Why are fish so smart?

Sometimes you just need a good laugh, and your students do too! Whether it’s a chuckle about classrooms, students, supplies, or teachers, these school jokes for kids are just the thing to take in when you need a bit of humor during the day.

Our Favorite School Jokes for Kids

1. what is a snake’s favorite subject in school.

Hisssssstory.

2. Which school supply is king of the classroom?

3. why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school.

Because her students were so bright.

4. What time would it be if Godzilla came to school?

Time to run!

5. What is a witch’s favorite subject in school?

6. which letter of the alphabet has the most water, 7. what’s the best place to grow flowers in school.

In kindergarden.

8. Why did the teacher draw on the window?

Because he wanted his lesson to be very clear!

9. What do elves learn in school?

The elf-a-bet.

10. Why did the egg get thrown out of class?

Because he kept telling yolks.

11. Why did the dog do so well in school?

Because he was the teacher’s pet.

12. Why are fish so smart?

Because they live in schools.

13. Why do magicians do so well in school?

They’re good at trick questions.

14. What do you need to go to high school?

15. why did the kid eat his homework.

Because his teacher said it was a piece of cake.

16. Why isn’t there a clock in the library?

Because it tocks too much.

17. Why did the teacher jump into the pool?

He wanted to test the water.

18. What kind of school do surfers go to?

Boarding school.

19. What did one pencil say to the other on the first day of school?

Looking sharp!

20. What do you do if a teacher rolls her eyes at you?

Pick them up and roll them back!

21. Why was the broom late for school?

He over-swept.

22. Which building has the most stories?

The library!

23. How many letters are in the alphabet?

11: T-H-E A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.

24. How do fish get to school?

The octobus!

25. Why did the jellybean go to school?

To become a Smartie!

26. What does your computer do for lunch?

Has a byte!

27. What dinosaur had the best vocabulary?

The thesaurus.

28. What did the buffalo say at drop-off?

29. what does a book do in the winter.

Puts on a jacket.

30. What did the paper say to the pencil?

31. what contest do skunks win at school.

The smelling bee!

32. Why do calculators make great friends?

You can always count on them.

33. What school requires you to drop out in order to graduate?

Skydiving school.

34. What should you grow in a school garden?

Human beans.

35. Why did the girl do her homework on an airplane?

To achieve a higher education.

36. Why can’t pirates learn the alphabet?

Because they keep getting lost at C.

37. Why do music teachers need a ladder?

To reach the high notes.

38. How do bees get to school?

On the school buzz.

39. Why is history a sweet subject?

Because it has many dates.

40. Why didn’t the sun go to college?

Because it already has many degrees.

41. What is the blackboard’s favorite drink?

Hot CHALKolate.

42. What’s a butterfly’s favorite subject?

MOTHematics.

43. Who is everyone’s best friend at school?

The princiPAL.

44. Why is 2 + 2 = 5 like your left foot?

It’s not right.

45. Why did the square and triangle go to the gym?

To stay in shape.

46. Which animal cheats on exams?

47. what are the 10 things teachers can always count on.

Their fingers.

48. How do you make seven an even number?

By removing the S.

49. How did the music teacher get locked out of her classroom?

Her keys were on the piano.

50. What does a thesaurus eat for breakfast?

A synonym roll.

51. What school does an ice cream man go to?

Sundae school.

52. What’s so fresh in the chemistry class?

The experiMINTS.

53. Why does the math class make students sad?

Because it is full of problems.

54. Which is the tallest school building?

The library, because it has so many stories.

55. Why are music teachers good baseball players?

Because they have a perfect pitch.

56. What do you call a classmate with a dictionary in their pants?

Smartie pants.

57. Who’s the superhero in computer class?

The Screen Saver!

58. What did the paper say to the pen?

You have a good point.

59. What is black when it’s clean and white when it’s dirty?

The blackboard.

60. Why do we measure a snake in inches?

Because it doesn’t have feet.

61. Which tree is the math teacher’s favorite?

62. what’s the most tired school supply.

A knapsack.

63. Why did the student throw her watch out of the school window?

She wanted to see time fly.

64. Which are the smartest letters of the alphabet?

The (wise) Ys.

65. Why do fireflies get bad grades at school?

Because they are not bright enough.

66. Why is the obtuse angle always upset?

He can never be right!

67. What’s a frog’s favorite year?

A leap year.

68. Which state is called the land of pencils?

Pennsylvania.

69. Which U.S. state has the most math teachers?

Mathachusetts!

70. How do you know that Saturn was married more than once?

Because it has so many rings!

71. What does a spider do on the Internet?

Create a WEBsite.

72. When do student astronauts eat?

During launch time.

73. What are the coolest letters of the alphabet?

74. what makes a circle overqualified.

It has 360 degrees!

75. How much do computers eat for lunch?

Want even more school jokes for kids check out our math jokes , history jokes , science jokes , grammar jokes , and music jokes ., if you liked these school jokes for kids and want more articles like this, be sure to subscribe to our newsletters .

We all need a good laugh on occasion! Put up these school jokes for kids for a fun humor break for your students.

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Department of Statistics celebrates hundreds of spring 2024 graduates

jokes on phd students

On Wednesday, May 8, the Department of Statistics community gathered to celebrate a total of 647 new alumni, including 566 undergraduates and 81 graduate students, across the department’s array of academic programs.

The department’s spring 2024 graduates have successfully completed the following programs:

  • Data Science Major: 334
  • Statistics Major: 59
  • Data Science Certificate : 182
  • Statistics Certificate : 10
  • MS Statistics: Statistics and Data Science option: 51
  • MS Statistics: Biostatistics option: 1
  • MS Statistics: Statistics option: 4
  • MS Data Science: 2 (This is the first-ever graduating cohort of the MS Data Science , a joint professional program between the Departments of Statistics and Computer Sciences.)
  • PhD Statistics: 4

Our new alumni have a wide range of backgrounds and skill sets, as the five vignettes below illustrate.

Susan Glenn, PhD Statistics

jokes on phd students

“You’re trying to understand the unknowable,” Glenn said. “I think that’s the side of statistics I really love.”

Statistics highlights: Glenn has assisted Cisewski-Kehe on research in the field of astrostatistics, looking for patterns in data to reveal astronomical discoveries. Her research has also delved into Topological Data Analysis (TDA), which pulls methods from topography, allowing researchers to look for patterns in noisy datasets by scrutinizing the shape of the data in space—and looking for holes.

Glenn said Cisewski-Kehe and Zhu were both “amazing advisors,” and she credited several other faculty members with opening her eyes to new statistical techniques, including Associate professor Garvesh Raskutti and Professor Cécile Ané.

Post-graduation plans: Postdoctoral Researcher, Los Alamos National Laboratory (New Mexico)

Claire Knutson, Data Science major

jokes on phd students

Statistics highlights: For Knutson, one of the more memorable courses in her time at UW-Madison was STAT 340 (Data Modeling II) with Brian Powers . “I really enjoyed the class and his teaching style,” Knutson said. “He always worked to make the class interesting and I enjoyed when he would make statistics jokes. I appreciated the sense of lightness and fun it brought to the class.”

Post-graduation plans: Software Engineer at ForeFlight (Austin, TX). “ForeFlight is a flight planning software company, where I previously interned and have been working throughout my Senior year,” Knutson said. “I am passionate about aviation, so I’m excited to apply the skills I have learned at the UW to help solve real problems in the aviation industry.”

Yinuo Chen, Data Science & Statistics double major

jokes on phd students

Statistics highlights: While many technical disciplines leave little room for uncertainty, Chen noted that, like Glenn, she liked that the opposite is true in Statistics.

“My experience in Statistics and Data Science experience has taught me to embrace complexity and uncertainty, enabling me to make impactful contributions to real-world challenges,” Chen said.

Post-graduation plans: Applying to Statistics graduate programs

Zekun (Bill) Wang, MS Statistics: Statistics and Data Science Option

jokes on phd students

Statistics highlights: Wang thanked numerous faculty members for their impact on his MS journey. “I am very honored and fortunate to have started my research journey under the guidance of Assistant Professor Joshua Cape and Assistant Professor Vivak Patel,” Wang said. “I also sincerely thank Assistant Professor Yiqiao (Joe) Zhong, Assistant Professor Nicolas Garcia Trillos, Assistant Professor Yinqiu He, and Professor Chunming Zhang, for their wonderful lectures and recommendations to Ph.D. programs in Statistics.”

Post-graduation plans: Pursuing PhD in Applied Mathematics and Statistics at Johns Hopkins University (Baltimore, MD). “The Department of Statistics at UW-Madison has been instrumental in nurturing and equipping me for the upcoming PhD journey,” Wang said.

Grant Zhou, Statistics major

jokes on phd students

Grant Zhou is graduating with a double major in Statistics and Mathematics, in addition to a Computer Sciences Certificate. As an undergraduate, he was involved with research for the IceCube Neutrino Observatory; he will transition directly into his PhD program next year.

Statistics highlights: Zhou described his work with Cisewski-Kehe in the IceCube Observatory as “unforgettable.”

He explained, “We spent almost two years working on developing new statistical methodologies for the IceCube Neutrino Observatory. [Cisewski-Kehe] is truly patient and inspiring, and she gives me priceless guidance in doing interdisciplinary research, which motivates me to keep working on related topics after graduation.”

Post-graduation plans: Pursuing PhD in Statistics at Carnegie Mellon University (Pittsburgh, PA). “I will focus on inverse problems and spatio-temporal data in physical science,” Zhou said.

Congratulations to all of the newest alumni of the UW-Madison Department of Statistics!

For more information about Department of Statistics degrees, explore our undergraduate programs or graduate programs .

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‘princeton princess’ whines that she’s ‘starving,’ blames university after choosing to go on anti-israel hunger strike.

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An anti-Israel protester at Princeton University sounded off about how she was “starving” during a self-imposed hunger strike and accused the prestigious university of purposefully “physically weakening” students.

Video shows the protester and other demonstrators railing into a megaphone about the New Jersey Ivy League school’s refusal to divest from Israel following Hamas’ unprovoked attack on the Jewish state on Oct. 7.

“This is absolutely unfair. My peers and I, we are starving. We are physically exhausted. I am quite literally shaking right now as you can see,” the protester says into the megaphone in a widely shared video on X .

A student-led hunger strike began Friday, with protesters demanding the school meet with them to discuss divestment and drop the criminal and disciplinary charges against two students who were arrested for erecting tents and 13 other peers who were arrested for trespassing an academic hall last month, Princeton’s student newspaper, the Daily Princetonian, reported Monday.

protesters

After meeting with administrators on Monday, students indicated that they have no intention of halting their protest, which has left them “immunocompromised,” according to the female protester whose rally cry has gone viral online.

“We are both hot and cold at the same time. We are all immunocompromised and based on the university’s meeting yesterday with some of our bargaining team, they would love to continue physically weakening us because they can’t stand to say no to unjust murder,” the protester said to cheers and banging of drums.

protester

Despite the complaints, the protester in the video concedes that going on a hunger strike was their choice.

“I will say I truly do not feel like I am doing anything special. This is my choice, and I would not spend my birthday doing anything other than being here,” the protester said.

“No matter how physically weak we may be, united we have never been stronger,” they added as the crowd began to chant, “The people united will never be defeated!”

protest

According to the student newspaper, at least 15 students were taking part in the hunger strike Sunday night.

It was not immediately clear how that number may have changed throughout the week.

School president Christopher Eisgruber, graduate school dean Rodney Priestley and Amaney Jamal, dean of the School of Public and International Affairs, told students in an email Tuesday that administrators were working with the protesters.

“My colleagues and I are now in direct conversation with the protestors,” he wrote. “I have told them that we can consider their concerns through appropriate processes that respect the interests of multiple parties and viewpoints, but we cannot allow any group to circumvent those processes or exert special leverage.”

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Since 2014, the Abdul Latif Jameel Water and Food Systems Lab (J-WAFS) has advanced interdisciplinary research aimed at solving the world's most pressing water and food security challenges to meet human needs. In 2017, J-WAFS established the Rasikbhai L. Meswani Water Solutions Fellowship and the J-WAFS Graduate Student Fellowship. These fellowships provide support to outstanding MIT graduate students who are pursuing research that has the potential to improve water and food systems around the world. 

Recently, J-WAFS awarded the 2024-25 fellowships to Jonathan Bessette and Akash Ball, two MIT PhD students dedicated to addressing water scarcity by enhancing desalination and purification processes. This work is of important relevance since the world's freshwater supply has been steadily depleting due to the effects of climate change. In fact, one-third of the global population lacks access to safe drinking water. Bessette and Ball are focused on designing innovative solutions to enhance the resilience and sustainability of global water systems. To support their endeavors, J-WAFS will provide each recipient with funding for one academic semester for continued research and related activities.

“This year, we received many strong fellowship applications,” says J-WAFS executive director Renee J. Robins. “Bessette and Ball both stood out, even in a very competitive pool of candidates. The award of the J-WAFS fellowships to these two students underscores our confidence in their potential to bring transformative solutions to global water challenges.”

2024-25 Rasikbhai L. Meswani Fellowship for Water Solutions

The Rasikbhai L. Meswani Fellowship for Water Solutions is a doctoral fellowship for students pursuing research related to water and water supply at MIT. The fellowship is made possible by Elina and Nikhil Meswani and family. 

Jonathan Bessette is a doctoral student in the Global Engineering and Research (GEAR) Center within the Department of Mechanical Engineering at MIT, advised by Professor Amos Winter. His research is focused on water treatment systems for the developing world, mainly desalination, or the process in which salts are removed from water. Currently, Bessette is working on designing and constructing a low-cost, deployable, community-scale desalination system for humanitarian crises.

In arid and semi-arid regions, groundwater often serves as the sole water source, despite its common salinity issues. Many remote and developing areas lack reliable centralized power and water systems, making brackish groundwater desalination a vital, sustainable solution for global water scarcity. 

“An overlooked need for desalination is inland groundwater aquifers, rather than in coastal areas,” says Bessette. “This is because much of the population lives far enough from a coast that seawater desalination could never reach them. My work involves designing low-cost, sustainable, renewable-powered desalination technologies for highly constrained situations, such as drinking water for remote communities,” he adds.

To achieve this goal, Bessette developed a batteryless, renewable electrodialysis desalination system. The technology is energy-efficient, conserves water, and is particularly suited for challenging environments, as it is decentralized and sustainable. The system offers significant advantages over the conventional reverse osmosis method, especially in terms of reduced energy consumption for treating brackish water. Highlighting Bessette’s capacity for engineering insight, his advisor noted the “simple and elegant solution” that Bessette and a staff engineer, Shane Pratt, devised that negated the need for the system to have large batteries. Bessette is now focusing on simplifying the system’s architecture to make it more reliable and cost-effective for deployment in remote areas.

Growing up in upstate New York, Bessette completed a bachelor's degree at the State University of New York at Buffalo. As an undergrad, he taught middle and high school students in low-income areas of Buffalo about engineering and sustainability. However, he cited his junior-year travel to India and his experience there measuring water contaminants in rural sites as cementing his dedication to a career addressing food, water, and sanitation challenges. In addition to his doctoral research, his commitment to these goals is further evidenced by another project he is pursuing, funded by a J-WAFS India grant, that uses low-cost, remote sensors to better understand water fetching practices. Bessette is conducting this work with fellow MIT student Gokul Sampath in order to help families in rural India gain access to safe drinking water.

2024-25 J-WAFS Graduate Student Fellowship for Water and Food Solutions

The J-WAFS Graduate Student Fellowship is supported by the J-WAFS Research Affiliate Program , which offers companies the opportunity to engage with MIT on water and food research. Current fellowship support was provided by two J-WAFS Research Affiliates: Xylem , a leading U.S.-based provider of water treatment and infrastructure solutions, and GoAigua , a Spanish company at the forefront of digital transformation in the water industry through innovative solutions. 

Akash Ball is a doctoral candidate in the Department of Chemical Engineering, advised by Professor Heather Kulik. His research focuses on the computational discovery of novel functional materials for energy-efficient ion separation membranes with high selectivity. Advanced membranes like these are increasingly needed for applications such as water desalination, battery recycling, and removal of heavy metals from industrial wastewater. 

“Climate change, water pollution, and scarce freshwater reserves cause severe water distress for about 4 billion people annually, with 2 billion in India and China’s semiarid regions,” Ball notes. “One potential solution to this global water predicament is the desalination of seawater, since seawater accounts for 97 percent of all water on Earth.”

Although several commercial reverse osmosis membranes are currently available, these membranes suffer several problems, like slow water permeation, permeability-selectivity trade-off, and high fabrication costs. Metal-organic frameworks (MOFs) are porous crystalline materials that are promising candidates for highly selective ion separation with fast water transport due to high surface area, the presence of different pore windows, and the tunability of chemical functionality. In the Kulik lab, Ball is developing a systematic understanding of how MOF chemistry and pore geometry affect water transport and ion rejection rates. By the end of his PhD, Ball plans to identify existing, best-performing MOFs with unparalleled water uptake using machine learning models, propose novel hypothetical MOFs tailored to specific ion separations from water, and discover experimental design rules that enable the synthesis of next-generation membranes.  

Ball’s advisor praised the creativity he brings to his research, and his leadership skills that benefit her whole lab. Before coming to MIT, Ball obtained a master’s degree in chemical engineering from the Indian Institute of Technology (IIT) Bombay and a bachelor’s degree in chemical engineering from Jadavpur University in India. During a research internship at IIT Bombay in 2018, he worked on developing a technology for in situ arsenic detection in water. Like Bessette, he noted the impact of this prior research experience on his interest in global water challenges, along with his personal experience growing up in an area in India where access to safe drinking water was not guaranteed.

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Related links.

  • Kulik Research Group
  • Abdul Latif Jameel Water and Food Systems Lab (J-WAFS)
  • K. Lisa Yang Global Engineering and Research (GEAR) Center
  • Department of Chemical Engineering
  • Department of Mechanical Engineering

Related Topics

  • Awards, honors and fellowships
  • Graduate, postdoctoral
  • Chemical engineering
  • Mechanical engineering
  • Desalination
  • Climate change
  • Sustainability
  • Environment
  • International development
  • Computer modeling

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