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Study guides for every class, that actually explain what's on your next test, from class:.

A memoir is a narrative that recounts personal experiences and reflections, often focusing on significant events or periods in the author's life. It combines storytelling with truth, creating a compelling personal account that explores themes of identity, memory, and emotion while often revealing deeper truths about human experience.

congrats on reading the definition of memoir . now let's actually learn it.

5 Must Know Facts For Your Next Test

• Memoirs differ from autobiographies in that they typically focus on specific themes or events rather than covering the author's entire life.
• Writers of memoir often employ literary techniques such as dialogue, imagery, and character development to enhance the narrative and engage readers.
• A memoir can evoke strong emotions by highlighting the author's personal struggles, triumphs, and the universal truths found within their unique experiences.
• Fact and creativity must be balanced in memoir writing; while the story is based on real events, authors have the freedom to shape the narrative for artistic effect.
• Memoirs can serve as powerful tools for self-reflection and understanding, both for the writer and the reader, fostering empathy and connection through shared experiences.

Review Questions

• A memoir differs from an autobiography mainly in its focus and narrative style. While an autobiography encompasses the entirety of a person's life, a memoir hones in on specific events or themes that hold significance for the author. This allows memoirists to explore deeper emotional truths and insights through storytelling, using literary techniques that create a more engaging and compelling narrative.
• Emotional depth is crucial in crafting a successful memoir as it helps readers connect with the author's experiences on a personal level. By sharing genuine emotions tied to pivotal moments in their lives, writers can evoke empathy and understanding. This emotional resonance not only enhances the narrative but also allows readers to reflect on their own lives and experiences, making the memoir relatable and impactful.
• Balancing fact with creativity in memoir writing is essential because it shapes how readers perceive both the narrative and its authenticity. When writers incorporate creative elements such as vivid imagery and character development while remaining true to the essence of their experiences, they create a more engaging story. This balance helps maintain credibility while also allowing for artistic expression, ultimately drawing readers into the author's journey and fostering a deeper connection with their story.

Related terms

autobiography : A detailed account of a person's life written by that person, typically covering their entire life span.

A short piece of writing that reflects the author's personal opinions, feelings, and experiences, often focusing on a specific theme or moment.

creative nonfiction : A genre of writing that uses literary styles and techniques to create factually accurate narratives, including memoirs.

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Creative non-fiction: Writing a memoir

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January 22, 2012 By Anne R. Allen 71 Comments

How to Write a Publishable Memoir: 12 Do’s and Don’ts

by Anne R. Allen

They say we all have a book inside us—our own life story. The urge to put that story on paper is the most common reason people start writing. Adult education programs and senior centers everywhere offer courses in “writing your own life.” Memoir is the most popular genre at any writers conference.

Unfortunately, it’s the hardest to write well—and the least likely to be published.

Agent Kristin Nelson once blogged that she’s seen so many bad memoirs that she cringes when she meets a memoirist a writer’s conference. Author J. A. Konrath offered the simple advice: “Unless you’re one of the Rolling Stones, don’t write anything autobiographical.” Miss Snark pronounced, “every editor and agent I know HATES memoir pitches…I’d rather shave the cat.”

But memoirs like  Eat, Pray, Love, In the Garden of Beasts  and  Townie: a Memoir , top the bestseller lists.

In this age of “reality” TV, there’s a huge audience for shared real-life experience. Readers are hungry for true stories: look how angrily they reacted to writers like James Frey and Herman Rosenblat, who passed off fiction as memoir.

So keep working on that masterpiece-in-progress. But hone your craft—brilliant wordsmithing and/or stand-up-worthy comedy skills help a bunch—and follow some basic dos and don’ts:

1)     DO read other memoirs 

Before you put pen to paper, it’s a good idea to read some currently selling memoirs. See what works and what doesn’t. Know the genre and the market

2)     DON’T write an autobiography

An autobiography is a list of events: “I was born in (year) in (place) and I did (this) and (that.) Mr. Konrath is right—unless you’re Mick Jagger, nobody cares. (Except your family. Don’t let me discourage you from self-publishing a chronicle of your life as a gift to your descendants.)

3)     DO tell a page-turning story

Abook-length memoir is read and marketed as a novel. It needs a novel’s narrative drive. That means tension and conflict—and ONE main story arc to drive the action. Most memoirs fail from lack of focus. Choose a basic storyline, like: “Orphan kids save the family farm during the Depression,” or “A cross-dressing teen survives high school in the 1950s.”

4)     DON’T confuse memoir with psychotherapy

Writing a book about a traumatic personal event may be cathartic for the writer, but there’s a reason shrinks charge big bucks to listen to people’s problems. Put the raw material in a journal to mine later for fiction, poetry, and personal essays.

5)     DO remember that a memoirist, like a novelist, is essentially an entertainer .

A memoir may be nonfiction, but it requires a creative writer’s skill set. Always keep your reader in mind. Never fabricate, but only tell what’s unique, exciting and relevant to your premise.

6)     DON’T expect a big audience for medical journaling

If you or a loved one has a serious disease, chronicling your experiences can be invaluable to those suffering similar trials. To the general public—not so much. You may find it’s best to reach your audience through online forums, blogs, and magazines. (See #6) Remember that publishing is a business, and no matter how sad your story, if it’s not an enjoyable read, it won’t find an audience.

7)    DO consider non-book formats to tell your story.

Beginning writers often make the mistake of jumping into a book-length opus. It’s smarter and easier to start with short pieces—what a writer friend calls “memoiric essays.” Nostalgia and senior-oriented magazines and blogs are great venues for tales of life in the old days. Some niche journals and websites focusing on hobbies, pets, disablities, veterans, etc. even provide a paying market. These will also give you some great publishing credits, and you won’t have to slog for years before reaching an audience.

This is one area where  BLOGGING  can provide you with a fantastic forum. A new blog I love is by  Tony Piazza , a veteran of the film business—and mystery author—who has insightful stories about every Hollywood star you ever heard of.

8)     DON’T include every detail 

Including every little incident and every character because “it’s what really happened” doesn’t make good storytelling. Just because something is true doesn’t mean it’s interesting. Your happy memories of that idyllic Sunday school picnic in vanished small-town America will leave your reader comatose unless the church caught fire, you lost your virginity, and/or somebody stole the parson’s pants.

9)     DO limit the story to an area where your experience is significant and unique .

If you gave birth in the mud at Woodstock, dated Elvis, or helped decipher the Enigma code, make that the focus of your book. I knew a musician who worked with of some of the great legends of American music. His memoir of those jazzy days was gripping, but because it was buried in his “happy ever after” life story, he never found a publisher.

10)   DON’T jump into the publishing process.

First hone your skills as a creative writer. Unless you’re only writing for your grandchildren (nothing wrong with that—but be clear in your intentions) you need to become an acomplished writer before you can expect non-family members to read you work. Even the most skilled editor can’t turn a series of reminiscences into a cohesive narrative.

NOTE:  There are ghostwriters who specialize in memoirs, so if you want to get your story into book form and aren’t interested in becoming a professional writer, you can hire one. Many editing services offer ghostwriting—a more expensive process than editing—but worth the cost if you don’t enjoy the writing process. I’d recommend using a memoir specialist like  YourMemoir.co.uk ., which looks like an excellent service.

11) DO look at small and regional publishers.

A national publisher may not be interested in stories of the vanished ranch life of old California, but a local publisher who has outlets at tourist sites and historical landmarks may be actively looking for them. Another plus: you don’t need an agent to approach most regional publishers. A good example of a memoir that found a home at a regional press is Anne Schroeder’s  Branches on the Conejo,Leaving the Soil after Five Generations   (Another perk of being with a small regional press is that the book can still be in print after a decade.)

12) DON’T get discouraged.

Ann Carbine Best, an award-winning poet, knew she had a story to tell that would help thousands of women who shared her experience. Unfortunately, most publishers thought her subject matter was too niche and controversial to be a blockbuster. But with a small press, she found a welcoming audience for  In the Mirror , her memoir of a doomed marriage.

If you’re working on a memoir, polish your creative writing skills, remember publishing is a business, keep your reader in mind–and you’ll avoid the cringe-making amateurishness that agents, editors and readers fear.

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About Anne R. Allen

Anne writes funny mysteries and how-to-books for writers. She also writes poetry and short stories on occasion. Oh, yes, and she blogs. She's a contributor to Writer's Digest and the Novel and Short Story Writer's Market.

Her bestselling Camilla Randall Mystery RomCom Series features perennially down-on-her-luck former socialite Camilla Randall—who is a magnet for murder, mayhem and Mr. Wrong, but always solves the mystery in her quirky, but oh-so-polite way.

Anne lives on the Central Coast of California, near San Luis Obispo, the town Oprah called "The Happiest City in America."

January 22, 2012 at 5:59 pm

Whoo! Well done Cayla! I shall go and put this on her Facebook wall so she can find it, bahaha!

As for autobiography … I've often been told my Army Brat upbringing would make a good story, but I'm not so sure. There's enough army brats out there aren't there? besides, it's the hilarious misadventures that happen briefly in between the normality that would make mine different, and I have no idea how interested the reader would be. I shall stick to fiction, methinks 🙂

Awesome post though! 🙂

January 22, 2012 at 6:09 pm

These are some fantastic tips! Thank you!

I wish my life was interesting enough to write a memoir but I've not had anything extraordinary happen to me. I might write one for my children/grand-children/descendents though. I hope it inspires them enough to become writers also!

January 22, 2012 at 6:20 pm

Not something I would ever write (my life was rather average) but great tips for those who do.

July 6, 2021 at 7:50 am

You may think your life was average, but you never know what other’s think!

January 22, 2012 at 6:38 pm

Hi Anne! I wholeheartedly agree with all your advice. I've been writing my memoir (off and on!) for a LONG time. But I've learned so much and become a better writer over the past couple of years, so I do believe things are progressing as they should. I just sent a check to Ann Best for her memoir! Can't wait to read it!

January 22, 2012 at 6:41 pm

Anne, great, usable advice as always.

But there is one other approach, the one my DH used: have a horrible, traumatic, earth-shattering (literally) experience & then wait 50 years to tell it.

At a young soldier, Michael was sent to the Pacific Proving Ground to "observe" as the Army called it, the US H-bomb tests. He made notes at the time & over the years tried many times to tell the story but the events were so bizarre and horrific, he couldn't quite figure out how to write it.

Slow forward 50 years: he tried again & this time we managed to laugh just about all the way thru. The book is called THE ATOMIC TIMES (the name of the Eniwetok newspaper he edited) and has been praised by readers from Henry Kissinger to Robert Parker.

Lesson: some experiences need quite a long time to marinate!

January 22, 2012 at 7:22 pm

Charley–I sure find it easier to write fiction than the real stuff. I can't stop making things up, for one thing. 🙂

Kamille–A great memoirist can make "ordinary" things become extraordinary, but that's not a talent I have. Fiction works better for me, too.

Alex–You mean the CassaStar books aren't written from your personal experience in intergalactic travel? Well, I'm going to tell Oprah…

CS (aka Wordmonger)–How many people have quit their jobs to go live on a remote goat ranch for a year?

Ann–Excellent advice from somebody who knows how to do it right. Thanks.

Becky–You've got it exactly right. It takes a long time to write a professional-quality memoir.

Mark–Welcome! I'm so glad you found it helpful. Your book sounds intriguing.

Ruth–You're right. And I think Michael's experience isn't unique. I think a lot of people have to process a traumatic event for a long time before they can write about it.

January 22, 2012 at 9:10 pm

@Charley R – I think you could have a collection of shorts that's all those oddly bizzare moments, those would work great. Or stick to fictin. You're really good at that! *giggles*

AND OMG I won! *excited dance* (I actually saw the e-mail first so I got out most of my squeeling then. Hopefully not to the detriment of Catherine's ears/eyes.) Anyway before I babble too much(too late I know)…

yeah my life has been fairly bland, after all that's why I write fiction. I've been escaping the bland into my own fantastical worlds for quite some time.

January 22, 2012 at 11:00 pm

Phyllis–Yes, of course you can print it out and pass it around, as long as you give credit me and the blog. You might mention there will be more stuff like this in the book I'm writing with Catherine Ryan Hyde that will be out in June.

And oh, my you do have some intense life experiences to write about. But I think for those of us who are long-time fiction writers, that stuff gets into our writing in many ways, doesn't it?

Mark–You're so right that travel memoirs do really well. That's what Eat, Pray, Love is, essentially. And if people want to get a travel memoir published, they should be writing short travel articles now.

Cathryn, Congratulations! I don't think it's your life experiences that make you a fiction or nonfiction writer–no matter how exciting your real life is. I think it's something you're born with. I've been into fiction from the time I could hold a crayon. I guess I'm a born liar. 🙂

January 22, 2012 at 11:03 pm

But if you want to make money at memoir writing, you still have a few more steps to go:

13) be extremely famous before starting

14) cross platforms of fame before even thinking first draft, ie. if you are a pop star, do something on Broadway, or if you are an actor, build a school in Gambia.

15) randomly split names of past lovers into two groups. For the first group, mention every last salacious detail. For the second group, appear to have difficulty remembering who that person was.

Now the money will start flowing in!

William Doonan http://www.themummiesofblogspace9.com

January 23, 2012 at 12:47 am

Anne, another meaty post. I had to laugh at #8–"DON’T include every detail because 'it’s what really happened.'”

Anyone who has ever taught creative writing knows how tough it is to drill this rule into people's heads. I knew a few teachers who actually assigned an autobiography to students in the first class, so they could do an "information-dump" and kind of purge all these details from their systems. (Wouldn't that be fun to grade? Aargh.)

Fact is, many people sign up for creative writing courses beCAUSE they have some trauma or strange twist in their personal narratives that they're dying to tell people about. As their teacher, you need to repeat until you're blue in the face: all details are not equally important, interesting or evocative, and a crafted memoir is the only one readers want to read.

January 23, 2012 at 12:59 am

Anne, I really like the idea of FIRST writing short personal essays or vignettes for special markets in print or online (#7 above if I interpreted correctly). Writing these short pieces is a great way to find your voice and to apply craft to real experience: dialogue, sense of place and time, story arc, etc. All good story components are critical, I think, for writing exciting and compelling memoir. Start small. Especially if you're thinking of writing a much longer work later on.

Great post, as usual, Anne.

January 22, 2012 at 6:22 pm

Another fine post. Thanks, again, Anne, & I'm with Kamille. I'm such a milquetoast!

January 22, 2012 at 6:30 pm

My advice: pretty much as you've outlined here, Anne. Get the necessary writing skills and read other memoirs, and use the techniques of fiction, which is crucial. My skill with dialogue was what made my memoir as strong as it is (I'm not as good with descriptive passages). Readers like dialogue. It really moves the story along.

I began writing pieces of my memoir even three decades before it finally came together and was published. Even after I got the publishing contract, there were MANY times when I was discouraged; it isn't easy delving into painful memories. But I'm glad I didn't "throw in the towel" as I sometimes felt like doing during the editing process. The book launch was a great 71st birthday present. It's never too late to write and be published! So if you think you've got a compelling story to tell…I agree that people do like to read "true" stories. So write a good one!

Great post, Anne. And thanks for including a link to my memoir. Ann Best, Author of In the Mirror & Other Memoirs

January 23, 2012 at 2:38 am

The only way I'd ever write a memoir is in graphic novel form so I could be a superhero, or at least have a cool cape. Triple stars for your advice to mine life's events for use in fiction.

January 22, 2012 at 6:40 pm

Aloha Anne,

I found your blog via a tweet from Alex Cavanaugh (which I retweeted:)

As someone who's co-writing a memoir about a opera singer (who lost his voice, but found his cause) I wanted to say thanks and that this was a *great* post for me. You have a new follower:)

January 22, 2012 at 8:00 pm

I started a writing club here five years ago and most members now want to write memoirs. Can I print and pass out copies of your wonderful 12 Dos and Donts?

As for Moi, do I write about finding Mr. Right in marriage number three? Or about having my son kidnapped? Oh yes, and then ten years later, my other son was kidnapped.

January 22, 2012 at 9:09 pm

Memoirs that cross into other genres are the best commercially.

Bill Bryson's travel memoirs are huge sellers because they are simultaneously memoir, travelogue, humour and narrative non-fiction.

Everyone loves to travel, so well-written travel memoirs will always be popular.

January 23, 2012 at 8:16 am

NOT a memoir writer, but I'm glad you paid special attentiion to them here.

…….dhole

January 23, 2012 at 9:16 am

Hi Anne, Thanks so much for including me, Marnie from Your Memoir, in this post. It's absolutely brilliant and full of great advice. I think my favourite tip would be to remember that you have to entertain the audience and to this end a memoir needs a novel's narrative drive, no question. This is quite a difficult concept for some of my clients, who feel that to give their story a narrative drive is in some way not being authentic. They are quite reticent to treat themselves, and their story, as a 'real' book. Most of my clients are writing 'just' as a personal record for family and friends you see. A great post and some very interesting comments from people whose books I would love to read. Even those who say their lives are dull. I don't believe them. No such thing. Everybody's life is unique and interesting, which is why I love my job. Thanks again.

January 23, 2012 at 2:26 am

You are so right about reading other memoirs. The more of them I read, the more I see different ways to structure the story I want to tell. And the best ones I read (e.g., Bill Bryson) really put their story within a universal frame. In other words, the story is not really all about me. If it were, who besides my family would want to read it. Finally, I agree with the idea of getting the feet wet by publishing essays, but it's difficult to figure out where to tell my story beyond literary journals. I'm still working on that writing problem.

January 23, 2012 at 5:50 am

Great post, Anne. I am sure I'll never do a memoir. I mean who wants to read one more story about an ex hippie flower child who railed against the establishment, went without a certain undergarment (before gravity and childbirth ravaged them) and who basically had the best time when sex, drugs and rock 'n roll didn't cause a communicable desease? So what if I can't hear in one ear and my grandchildren don't understand why grandma is so different? You think for one minute I'd confirm any of it in print? Hell no! I mean, for me it's like identity theft, anyone stupid enough to steal my identity gets what they deserve 🙂

January 23, 2012 at 3:51 pm

Excellent post. I'm wary of memoirs, and tend only to read them when my book club insists. (I found eat, pray, love intensely boring and self indulgent.)

I love the idea of a memoirist putting several years of distance between the events and the recounting. I'm sure that lessens the "then this happened, then that happened" kind of narrative.

January 23, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Great detail and advice. I'm forwarding your link to the memoir discussion groups I belong to.

I would add that Memoir doesn't have to mean YOUR STORY. Expanding the personal to include the universal will involve more readers in "your" story.

Writing BRANCHES ON THE CONEJO taught me the importance of capturing social history. That little book has nearly sold through its 3500 print run and is now on out-of-print book sites for $75.

January 23, 2012 at 6:58 pm

William—LOL. Actually the most successful memoirs, like Eat Pray Love and Angela’s Ashes aren’t by mega-celebrities, but they are by professional writers and journalists with some stature in the business. It helps to have friends.

Rebecca—I think all of us who have taught newbies run into this all too often. It might be good to put this on the board on the first day and keep it there “a crafted memoir is the only one readers want to read.” People love to make lists of unrelated events.

Mindprinter—You know whereof you speak. You’ve written some superb personal essays that have found homes in lots of prestigious journals. And I’m still hoping for a screenplay of your story of your friendship with an emperor!

Julie—Think screenplay. Seriously. A screenplay is much easier to adapt from a shorter work than a longer one. If you have a great episode in your life to tell about, it might just make a good film. I’ve had the privilege of reading Mindprinter’s article from the African American Journal that I KNOW would make a hell of a movie.

Leslie—I love the idea of a graphic novel memoir. Has anybody done that? Cape or no cape, it could be awesome.

Fois—Oh, yes. I’m a member of the sex drugs and rock and roll generation too. We were so spoiled, weren't we: no horrible STDs or the TSA molesting us at airports. "Flying into Los Angeleez, bringing in a couple of Keys…" I’m not sure anybody but us wants to read about it now. But damn, it was fun.

Donna—Thanks. But never say never. You’ve got a job that provides a lot of fodder for writing.

Marnie—Thanks for stopping by. I’m really impressed with your site and your service. A lot of people are dying to tell their life story, but don’t care to learn to become professional writers, and you’re just the one to help them. Although I don’t envy you having to teach them it’s not “wrong” to turn history into something readable.

Mari—I love Ruth’s suggestion too. A few decades of aging might be required to make some stories palatable to the general public. (I’m generally not a fan of memoirs either, although every so often one astonishes me.)

LK—It sounds as if you’ve hit on a niche audience that will be loyal. Congrats on your success. The travel memoir (or essay) is a very popular form. With people who hope to travel to those place for real, or just in their armchairs.

Anne—Very good advice: a memoir doesn’t have to be about you. It’s nice to know your book is a collectible, but I hope you’ll put it in ebook soon so it doesn’t go out of print!

January 23, 2012 at 4:18 pm

My first book is a memoir about my backpacking days around Australia. During that year I kept a detailed diary of my experiences, and I thought it would be such a waste if I didn't try to write a book at the end of it. I published my manuscript as an ebook in April last year after having the work edited. I had no idea if I would sell any copies at all, so you can imagine my delight that at 9 months later, I have received several 5 & 4 star reviews from total strangers, most of whom live in America (I live in the UK). I still can't believe that I've created something which other people love and tell me they can't wait for book no. 2 – another memoir about travelling Canada.

January 25, 2012 at 6:12 am

Nicely done. Good advice. I have been thinking about ghost writing a memoir. This helps. Ciao, Carole http://www.facebook.com/Writingdivine

January 26, 2012 at 7:16 pm

golden–I think ghosting memoirs can be rewardiing. As long as the client understands that most memoirs don't make a lot of money. (People can have grandiose ideas of book profits, if they aren't familiar with the realities of the market.) Good luck. I'm glad this helps.

January 28, 2012 at 10:19 pm

Some really good tips here, thanks for this Anne. Thinking of some local celebrities who could have done with this list of does and don'ts lol.

January 29, 2012 at 5:30 pm

Thanks Emily. Yes, celebrities who don't use ghosts can put out some pretty unreadable stuff. And it sells anyway 🙁

July 19, 2012 at 8:22 pm

Great article. My husband's life has been bizarre journey through various subcultures and the seedier elements of society. Not only has he survived extreme scenarios that most people never encounter, the details are hilarious. He's a natural story teller, but some of the best stories are dependent on the weird cadre of people he has met. He wants to tell his story as a memoir and has no qualms about offending anyone, but being sued for some of the scandalous details is a real concern. How can he tell his story with all the oomph and appeal of "truth" without inviting defamation suits? None of the people involved would ever agree to be included, and while names can be changed, the real stories are too good to fictionalize. Have any advice?

July 19, 2012 at 8:41 pm

Anon–He will need to tread carefully. I would change the names of any character who is likely to take offense and do the Dear Abby trick of saying. "my friend…I'll call him 'Bud' did blankety-blank.."

And if he's accusing somebody of criminal activity–even a very long time ago–he's treading on very dangerous ground.

Most important, remember that a memoir needs to tell a story, not relate a series of anecdotes, so he might do better with a collection or series of funny stories.

I'd advise him to read some of David Sedaris's books and see how he uses funny personal stories in a way that's not libelous.

But your husband would probably do well to run things by a lawyer before publishing.

March 4, 2013 at 4:48 pm

David–Thanks. Most people write autobiography instead of memoir–and autobiography can be pretty dull, even when the subject is wildly famous. Most people prefer to read a story rather than a series of events. So if you can write about one incident instead of a whole lifetime, you're way ahead of the pack.

March 4, 2013 at 3:06 pm

This blog is great. I'm pleased I discovered it. I had my autobiography, Never Ending Circles, published last August but I had in mind a niche audience which were students. So I was surprised when it became popular with local general readers too. This was partly because they knew me and partly because I had written about things that had effected most people. I'm working on my memoir now and realising that you never stop learning your craft. I am now starting this one with a major incident in my life to grab the reader rather than childhood which I sort of wish I had also done with the auto/bio but its all part of the learning process I suppose. Look forward to more of your posts.

May 2, 2013 at 8:30 am

Best advice I've heard in a long time! I'm one of those medical "cases" (LOL) and I know I have to work extra, extra hard on the entertaining angle (not to the point it shows or is ridiculous, of course! Ha!) but enough that readers stay entertained, my themes shine through, and my message gets across. Quick n' easy… Yeah, right! I'm trying! Thanks for honest, straight-to-ya advice. Much appreciated. -Leslie aka The Healing Redhead

January 20, 2014 at 6:46 pm

I missed this one Leslie. Sounds as if you'll have a good book! Keeping in mind that it needs to be entertaining is half the battle.

January 20, 2014 at 10:18 am

I want to write up my travel memoirs from my year around the world. If this was yours memoir how would you write it? Person, theme, style etc? Would you focus on the photo side? Natalie

January 20, 2014 at 10:21 am

Brilliant advice.

How you would write a travel memoir from a year around the world?

I can't seem tho chose my narrative style for it or decide whether to make it a travel guide or memory based photo book.

January 20, 2014 at 6:53 pm

Natalie–If it were me, I wouldn't have the photos because I'm the world's worst photographer 🙂 But first let me congratulate you on managing to travel around the world. What a great accomplishment and how fun!

Trips like yours can often be best done in blog form. That way you can post all the photos and keep the narrative going in a simple linear style.

For a book, you need to consider the cost of photos. Big, big bux for print and tough to put in ebooks (Basic Kindles only see black and white)

Then you want a story arc. Look at what works in other memoirs. In Eat Pray Love, her arc was finding herself (and love) after a bad breakup. What's your reason for the trip? What thwarted you from accomplishing it? That's the thread that will keep readers turning the pages.

April 21, 2015 at 1:31 am

I've been trying to write my story (teen years) for about 10 years now. I had something very traumatic happen to me, it was a very abusive relationship. I couldn't write about the story because the man I was involved with was arrested and later became one of the first charges of it's kind in the country. There was a publication band and I couldn't write about it. But I just learned the other of the man's death. My friends who have read my blog writings and have followed the story are begging for me to write the story and share it because of the topic and because of the media attention the case got early on in investigation before the ban. I'm sitting here torn. I've written most of the story down over the years. Now that the man is dead I'm free to write about the trial (what I know) and him. But how to put this all in one book is overwhelming for me.

April 21, 2015 at 2:37 am

Wendy–Sometimes the best way to write about something is in fiction rather than confessional pieces and memoir. I find it much easier to do that. I wrote The Gatsby Game about an old boyfriend who died under mysterious circumstances. But by making the story fictional, I didn't have to go places I didn't want to go. (Which wouldn't have added to the story.).

And I once read a great piece of advice from playwright Marsha Norman, who wrote the gut-wrenching "Night Mother". She said "You can't write about something until it's over." And that means it has to be over and fully processed for YOU. There still may be things you need to process.

And nobody says you have to write about your traumas. Mostly I don't. I've been through a lot of things nobody needs to know about except my family and friends. I think we live in an era of too much information. It's okay to keep something private if you'd prefer to do that. There are lots of other subjects to write about besides trauma.

July 17, 2015 at 10:21 pm

Thank you for this. Do you have a polite and sales-friendly way to say "no comment" when someone asks if a novel is autobiographical? I mean, I don't want to alienate a reader who is looking to bond with an author; however, it really is nobody's business.

Did I write a memoir about an anorexia sufferer's journey and the frustrating intricacies of the treatment industry? I don't know. I CAN tell you that I just published a book.

July 17, 2015 at 10:47 pm

Congrats on your new book! With a memoir, you have do deal with people who say "how can you remember exactly what somebody said 20 years ago–how can it all be true?" and if you write a novel, they think everything in it really happened to you..

With a memoir, you can say, "memory is always subjective. This is how I remember it".

With a novel you can say. "It's fiction, so it's all a product of my imagination. But of course real life experiences influence where my imagination goes."

July 17, 2015 at 11:21 pm

Thank you, and thanks for that helpful advice!

February 23, 2016 at 8:30 am

Thankyou so much. I’m writing my first Memoir at age 54 and am researching Blog vs Book . Hmm I might combine them both.

February 23, 2016 at 12:19 pm

Michelle–Blogging your memoir first and later turning it into a book can work really well. Check out Nina Amir’s blog “Blog Your Book.”

May 7, 2016 at 9:18 pm

Thank you!! This information is so helpful! I’m in the process of having my memoir edited and look forward to the new journey

May 7, 2016 at 9:25 pm

Rosann–I’m so happy this helps. A lot of people think memoir is easy to write, but it may be one of the toughest forms to do well. You’re very wise to hire an editor. Best of luck with your book!

March 20, 2017 at 4:25 am

I’m finding all this information from you, as well as the comments, very interesting indeed, and I’m making lots of notes longhand for later!

I too am in the process of writing a thematic memoir. The prompt, for want of another word, is the discovery of my journals handwritten when I was 13 yrs old, all of which contain incredible details of my life then which I couldn’t share in real-time, but which proved to be key evidence in a trial. Without those diaries there would have been no conviction or custodial sentence, which gives me the notion that a higher power was at play in those childhood days, preserving the evidence for the future me to have justice served, over FORTY years later…!

I’m getting loads of encouragement from friends, supporters and professional writers alike, to write this thematic memoir, not least to give courage to other people who, like me, survived, and to show that it is never too late to disclose and report historic crimes.

What I love about my childhood journals most though is the vivid observations, particularly about nature and the countryside I lived in. And how opinionated my young self was…oh my goodness! From all the social commentary the diaries contain it would appear that I also had my finger on the pulse of national & international news…

So anyway, that’s a rather long-winded way of saying how buoyed up I am by this blog with regard to my own writing. I have given myself a 3-year deadline from now to being ready to publish. And that’s despite the fact that I already have about 40,000 words gathered on my laptop over the past 3 years… I guess these things just take time, eh?

Thanks for listening as well as for all the great tips. All the best, Esther

March 20, 2017 at 9:31 am

Esther–It sounds as if you have a goldmine there in your childhood journals. I saved my childhood journals as well and incorporated them into my novel Food of Love. I think they gave the work an immediacy and intensity my mature voice would have missed.

Do consider starting a blog on the subject and use some of the stuff that can’t go in the book on the blog. You will then start building an audience that will be ready-made when your book is finished and you may help a number of young people along the way.

Best of luck!

June 11, 2017 at 8:45 am

Excellent. I’ve been editing lately for memoir writers, and I explain the problems with publishing but encourage the enterprise with realistic expectations. Sharing this!

June 11, 2017 at 9:21 am

Cindy–Thanks. I think that was the toughest part of editing for me–telling writers that a personal memoir was probably not going to be a big seller and not to expect the big bux. Some personal memoirs do break out, but most agents and publishers are not going to take a chance on them. 🙁

August 3, 2017 at 10:30 pm

Hi, thanks for the helpful list! I’m currently working on a collection of memoir-esque, dark/comic narrative non-fiction stories inspired by my time as an army “journalist” during the early years of the Iraq War. I’m roughly 50,000 words in and attempting to think ahead to next steps as I near completion (my goal is 70-90K words). The publishing process seems like it’s going to be a nasty beast, so that last point about not getting discouraged was well-placed for me. Your tips are already coming in handy. Thanks again, take care.

August 4, 2017 at 9:11 am

emj–Your idea sounds intriguing. Short memoiric essays (especially funny ones) tend to do better than long narrative memoirs because they can be published in magazines and on websites. You can start building an audience now, even before you finish the whole collection.

Look at the career of David Sedaris, who is the master of the short comic essay. If you can record some of them as podcasts, you can start building an audience with audio, too. Best of luck! .

August 4, 2017 at 11:32 am

Yes, I was planning on doing audio eventually, largely because I’ve always loved David Sedaris’ work. Maybe I’ll start sooner than later. And if you can recommend any publishers in the market for this sort of thing, I’m definitely all ears! Thanks for the quick reply.

August 4, 2017 at 3:12 pm

emj–The big publishing houses and most agents aren’t interested in memoir, unless you’re a Rolling Stone or you’ve run for President. But you may find a small press. Look at the Authors Publish website. They list publishers who don’t require an agent.. There’s a link to Authors Publish in most of my “opportunity alerts” at the bottom of recent blogposts. hit “home” to read the recent ones.

But your best way to get the book length collection published is to get smaller journals to publish pieces of it first.

And start a blog! I’ll be talking about that tomorrow.

January 9, 2018 at 5:15 pm

I appreciate the sage advice. I am in the process of writing my own memoir, roughly 75,000 words into it. I have began to stall, almost like I have run out of things to say. I did not think that was possible. I suffer from Bipolar and I started writing as a form of therapy; it has been cathartic to say the least. I have remembered things from my past I thought long gone from my memory. I have numerous funny stories, mostly about my mother, running throughout the book. My question is concerning your comment about not including all of the details. How do you know what details to leave out?

Thank you for your time.

January 9, 2018 at 6:57 pm

Jonathan–75K is actually a very respectable length for a nonfiction book these days. They’ve been shrinking fast in the last decade.

What you leave out is anything that’s not “Chekhov’s gun”. Chekhov famously said “if you have a gun on the table in act one, make sure it’s fired by the end of the play.” (I paraphrase.) But that’s true of all narrative. Only put in the details that move along the story.

You may find that you have enough out-takes to put into a blog or some nostalgia or inspirational anthologies. A blog, magazine, or anthology is a great way to get an audience for your book. Best of luck!

January 10, 2018 at 9:34 am

I actually had a blog once upon a time; I deleted it because nobody read it. Silly, I know. I thank you for the advice. I will see where this journey takes me. I will continue to follow your blog; glad to have found it.

January 10, 2018 at 9:52 am

Jonathan–You might find a lot of help in my new book “The Author Blog: Easy Blogging for Busy Authors.” I have several chapters devoted to memoirists like you. It’s only $2.99 right now for the ebook. 🙂

January 10, 2018 at 10:19 am

Thank You. I will look into it. If I may, I have one more question. How much of the memoir would you recommend posting on the blog?

Again, I appreciate your kindness. To not just me, but all aspiring authors. You do not have to do that.

January 10, 2018 at 10:33 am

Jonathan–You don’t want to put the memoir on the blog, because then it will be considered “published” and “freely available on the web” so both Amazon and trad pub will reject it. But what you want to put on the blog is all the out-takes and research.

That funny story that doesn’t quite fit, or long story about a peripheral character that makes the book too long. And photos! You can put all those photos that are so expensive to put in print.

January 4, 2019 at 12:32 pm

Hi, my husband and I are writing his memoir of his years as an army brat living in Okinawa with his family during the height of the Vietnam war in 1968, 1969 and 1970, When he was 11, 12 and 13 years old. The manuscript is about 48,000 words. It has been a three-year process with many drafts. We are Seeking advice about what our next step should be. Years ago when I lived in Oregon, I was a member of Willamette writers Guild. In the past, I wrote an art instructional book called Paint Happy (North Light 2002, 2004). I thought I live in California, should I re-join WWG to look for an agent? One reader (i sent it to a few friends) told me that a memoir should be 32,000 words. Another one told me it should be longer. I’m a bit at a loss. Can you please give me some advice? Thanks- And happy new year Cristina

January 4, 2019 at 2:47 pm

Hi Cristina–Here’s my post on how long a book should be by genre. http://bit.ly/2H5lJoS Generally a memoir is sold like a novel, so it should be about the same length (70K words) but it can be as few as 40K, depending on your audience. Your friend who quoted 32K was way off. Your length is probably fine.

You don’t need to belong to a writers’ group to get an agent. You do need to educate yourself on how to write a query, learn agent protocol, etc and you can learn a lot by networking with other writers. But you can do that online. Check out all the info on our page “How to Get Your Book Published” The link is in the menu bar at the top of the blog just under the header.

December 10, 2020 at 1:37 pm

Hello, I found this very helpful in my future writing project. Every one of us is a book holding on to be composed, and that book, whenever composed, brings about an individual clarified. Come and visit my blog on The Importance of Writing a Memoir

Thanks Byron

[…] Nothing could be further from the truth. Nonfiction needs to be even more carefully structured than fiction—especially memoir. A simple chronology almost never makes for compelling reading. (For more on writing memoir, see my post on How to Write a Publishable Memoir.) […]

[…] more on writing memoir, see Anne’s piece HOW TO WRITE A PUBLISHABLE MEMOIR and Ruth’s interview with memoirist Michael Harris on THE STORY THAT TOOK 50 YEARS TO […]

[…] That means you have to superimpose those things on a story that already exists, instead of creating your story around a structure.  More on this in my post “How to Write a Publishable Memoir.” […]

[…] time to consider which stories to include in your memoir.  According to writer, poet, and blogger Ann R Allen, you should choose the story/stories where your experience is “significant and unique.”  […]

[…] author and writing coach Anne R Allen instructs aspiring writers to scope out their competition.  Read other memoirs.  Study the […]

[…] Here are some excellent tips from Anne R. Allen for penning your memoir. […]

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Anne r allen’s blog with ruth harris.

• Personal Appearance and Reading October 13, 2024 Anne R. Allen
• Books by Anne R. Allen
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• HOW TO GET YOUR BOOK PUBLISHED

What Is a Memoir? Definition & 15+ Examples

Ever wondered how your life would read if it were a book? Welcome to the world of memoirs, the literary realm where life imitates art and personal tales echo universal truths.

Unraveling the threads of human experience, memoirs invite us into the intimate corners of a person’s world, offering a lens into their most transformative moments. They’re not just about recounting facts but about painting vibrant pictures of the human journey.

Buckle up for an exploration of memoirs and the remarkable ways they thread together the individual and the universal, the specific and the profound.

Table of Contents

Defining Memoir

A memoir is a form of creative nonfiction that enables an author to tell their personal story or share experiences in an artful and engaging manner. Generally derived from the French word “mémoire” (meaning memory or reminiscence), memoirs differ from autobiographies in that they focus on specific events or periods of the author’s life instead of presenting an extensive, chronological account.

Memoirs are highly subjective, allowing writers to examine their own lives through the lens of personal experiences and emotions. This leads to a more intimate portrayal of their stories, potentially resonating with readers on a deeper level.

Typically, memoirs tackle themes of identity , relationships , growth , and change , often borrowing stylistic elements from fiction.

Memoir vs. Autobiography vs. Biography

When you’re exploring the world of personal writing, it’s essential to understand the distinctions between memoir, autobiography, and biography. Each type of writing delves into a person’s life but with different approaches and intentions.

A memoir focuses on a specific aspect or time period in the author’s life, offering a personal and emotional glimpse into their experiences. As a memoir writer, you will share your unique perspective, allowing your readers to connect and empathize with your journey. Memoirs tend to be more emotional and reflective than autobiographies and biographies.

An autobiography is a comprehensive account of the author’s entire life, written by the subject themselves. As an autobiography writer, your task is to provide a factual and chronological account of your life, from birth to the present or at a specific point in time.

Unlike memoirs and biographies, autobiographies emphasize the personal perspective of the subject, offering a unique firsthand account of their life story.

A biography is a detailed account of another person’s life written by someone other than the subject. When writing a biography, your focus is on researching and presenting the facts of your subject’s life, often using sources like interviews, letters, and archives.

As a biographer, you aim to create an accurate, engaging, and informative representation of your subject’s life story. Biographies tend to be less personal and emotional than memoirs and autobiographies, focusing mainly on facts and events.

To summarize:

History of Memoir

Memoir, as a form of writing, has a long and varied history. It allows you to delve into the thoughts, experiences, and emotions of the writer, offering an intimate perspective on their life and the events that shaped them.

One of the earliest known memoirs is Julius Caesar’s “Commentaries on the Gallic War,” written in 50 BCE . As a politician and general, Caesar documented his military campaigns, giving insight into the strategies and decisions that led to his conquests. This work set a precedent for future memoirists, who would also detail their exploits in politics, war, and other arenas.

In the 19th century , the genre evolved to focus more on individual experiences and self-reflection. Henry David Thoreau’s “Walden” (1854) is a notable example, as it chronicles his two-year experiment in simple living in a cabin near Walden Pond. Thoreau’s exploration of his connection with nature and society is a testament to the power of memoir in revealing one’s innermost thoughts and motivations.

The 20th century brought even more diversity to the genre with the likes of Ernest Hemingway’s “A Moveable Feast” (1964), a posthumous collection of the author’s memories of his time among the expatriate community in 1920s Paris.

Tripping on the intersecting lives of fellow writers such as Ezra Pound and Gertrude Stein , the memoir paints a vivid picture of the Jazz Age’s artistic milieu.

Another influential work from this period is George Orwell’s “Homage to Catalonia” (1938), which documents his experiences fighting on the Republican side during the Spanish Civil War. The combination of Orwell’s journalistic skills and personal involvement in the conflict results in a gripping account that highlights the complexities of a divided Spain and the ideological struggles that defined the 1930s.

As you can discern, memoirs offer unique insights into the lives of extraordinary individuals. By reading these diverse accounts, you gain a deeper understanding of the world’s rich tapestry of experiences, which has shaped the course of human history.

Functions of Memoir

Memoir is a reflection of personal history.

A memoir allows you to share your life experiences and memories. In doing so, you reflect on your personal history and the events that have shaped who you are today. This process of reflection can lead to a greater understanding and appreciation of your past and your role in it, as well as the lessons learned and wisdom gained.

Memoir Has Therapeutic Effects

Writing a memoir often has therapeutic effects on the author. It can serve as a means for processing painful or unresolved experiences, allowing you to gain new insights and perspectives on your life. Through this process, you may find a sense of healing and personal growth that you may not have achieved otherwise.

Memoir Educates

A memoir can educate readers about different times, cultures, and ways of life. By sharing your personal experiences and memories, you can provide a unique window into a world that others may not have had the opportunity to experience themselves. Your memoir can engage readers in a way that traditional education methods may not, making your story an invaluable learning resource.

Memoir Inspires

Your memoir can inspire others to persevere and overcome challenges in their own lives. By sharing your resilience, determination, and growth, you may help readers find the strength and motivation to face their struggles and pursue their dreams. Your life experiences may also inspire others to take action, change their perspectives, or pursue new opportunities.

Memoir Preserves Legacy

Writing a memoir is a way to preserve your legacy and ensure your story lives on for future generations. Through your memoir, you can pass down your experiences, values, and beliefs, allowing readers to learn from your life and appreciate the inheritance of wisdom and knowledge you have provided.

Memoir Encourages Dialogue

By sharing your memoir, you invite readers into an open dialogue about the shared human experience. This dialogue can foster understanding, stimulate discussion, and promote introspection among readers, encouraging them to engage in meaningful conversations about their own lives and experiences.

Memoir Cultivates Empathy

Reading a memoir exposes you to the thoughts, feelings, and emotions of the author. By delving into someone else’s life, you develop a better understanding of their experiences and an increased ability to empathize with others. This heightened empathy can lead you to connect more deeply with those around you, fostering a sense of compassion and humanity.

Memoir Reveals Truth

Memoir writing often reveals personal truths and realities that may have remained hidden or misunderstood. By sharing your story, you expose your vulnerabilities, triumphs, and fears, inviting readers to embrace your authentic self.

Through the process of writing and sharing your memoir, you allow others to gain insights into your life and discover the genuine experiences that lie beneath the surface.

Characteristics of Memoir

Memoir is personal.

A memoir is a personal account of your life experiences and memories. It allows you to delve into your own history, exploring the events, emotions, and characters that have shaped your journey. These memories can be vividly detailed, giving readers a sense of intimacy and connection with your story.

Memoir Is Reflective

In a memoir, you not only recount your memories but also reflect on their meaning. This involves examining your beliefs, emotions, and reactions and considering how your experiences have shaped your character and choices.

Reflective writing helps readers understand the significance of your memoir, providing depth and insight into your life.

Memoir Is Truthful

Honesty is an essential aspect of a memoir. Your goal is to convey the truth of your experiences, thoughts, and feelings, not to create a fictional story. While memories may be imperfect, strive to be as accurate and genuine as possible. This transparency lends credibility to your memoir and deepens the reader’s connection with your story.

Memoir Is Focused

A memoir should have a clear, focused theme or central idea. This could be a particular phase of your life, a significant relationship, or a life-changing event. By concentrating on a specific aspect of your life, you can create a cohesive narrative that engages and informs readers.

Memoir Has a Narrative Arc

While a memoir is based on your memories and experiences, it should still follow a narrative structure. A narrative arc includes a beginning , middle , and end , with a clear progression of events, conflicts, and resolutions. This helps to propel your story forward, keeping readers invested in your journey.

Memoir Is Detailed

To create a vivid and captivating memoir, include specific sensory details that evoke memories and emotions. Consider sights, smells, sounds, tastes, and textures when recounting your experiences. These details not only paint a rich, immersive picture but also make your story more relatable and memorable for readers.

Memoir Is Evocative

A successful memoir elicits reactions and emotions from the reader, creating a deep connection to your story. Use vivid language and authentic emotions to convey the essence of your experiences, allowing readers to feel what you felt and empathize with your journey.

Memoir Offers Insight

As you recount your experiences, consider the lessons you’ve learned and the insights you’ve gained. By sharing your unique perspective and personal revelations, you offer readers a valuable window into your world, encouraging them to reflect on their own lives and experiences.

Memoir Is Immersive

Your memoir should draw readers into your world, allowing them to experience your life as you lived it. Provide context for your memories, such as historical or cultural backdrop, so that readers better understand your experiences. By fully immersing your readers in your world, your memoir becomes a more enriching and engaging experience.

Memoir Is Transformative

A powerful memoir not only recounts your memories and emotions but also illustrates your growth and transformation. Address the impact of your experiences and the ways in which they have shaped your beliefs, values, or identity. This journey of personal growth resonates with readers, making your memoir a transformative reading experience.

Elements of Memoir

Personal perspective.

In a memoir, you share your personal experiences and perspectives. This form of writing allows you to delve into your memories and connect with your readers on a deeper level. You need to be open about your thoughts, feelings, and perceptions in order to create an engaging and authentic story.

Narrative Structure

Your memoir should have a clear narrative structure with a beginning , middle , and end . This will help your readers follow your story and understand the progression of your experiences. Use chronological order, or experiment with non-linear timelines, flashbacks, or parallel storylines to add depth to your narrative.

Reflection and Insight

Reflection is key in a memoir. You should examine the meaning behind your experiences and the lessons you learned from them. By exploring your memories, you can gain insight into your past and present self. This process of self-discovery can be enlightening for both you and your readers.

A memoir requires honesty and transparency. Be open about your feelings, thoughts, and actions, even if it makes you vulnerable. By being truthful, you will create a strong connection with your readers and allow them to empathize with your experiences.

Vivid Details

In your writing, include vivid details to capture the essence of your experiences. Use descriptive language to paint a clear picture of the events and settings of your story. By doing this, you will allow your readers to immerse themselves in your world fully.

Dialogue plays a crucial role in bringing your memoir to life. Use authentic conversations to enhance your narrative and reveal aspects of your relationships with other characters. Ensure that your dialogue sounds natural and reflects the emotions and personalities of the characters involved.

A strong theme can give your memoir a sense of purpose and direction. Identify the central theme or overarching message you want to convey through your story. This could be related to personal growth, relationships, overcoming adversity, or other aspects of your life.

Character Development

Your characters should be well-developed and multidimensional. Show the complexities of their personalities, emotions, and motivations. Focus on both their strengths and weaknesses, and demonstrate how they evolved over time. Remember to treat yourself as a character as well, and display your growth throughout the memoir.

Set the stage for your narrative by describing the settings in which your experiences took place. Provide clear, detailed descriptions that help your readers visualize the locations and understand their importance in your story.

Conflict drives any compelling narrative, and your memoir should be no exception. Address the conflicts you faced, whether they were internal or external. Show how you confronted these challenges, and illustrate the impact they had on your life.

Structure of Memoir

Introduction.

When writing a memoir, you should start with an engaging introduction that sets the stage for your narrative and draws readers in. Use descriptive language and vivid imagery to establish the setting, characters, and context.

In the exposition, provide background information about your life, including key moments and characters. This helps readers understand your story and connects them to your experiences. Organize your exposition around themes or milestones to maintain a consistent narrative.

Inciting Incident

Identify the inciting incident — the event or situation that prompts you to tell your story. This event should hook the reader’s interest and set your memoir in motion, revealing the purpose behind your narrative.

Rising Action

During the rising action, build tension and drama by recounting events that lead up to the climax. Develop your characters and their relationships, share memorable anecdotes, and explore the emotional impact of these experiences on your life.

Reach the climax, or turning point, in your memoir. This moment should be emotionally charged, presenting a conflict or challenge that you must overcome. The climax is a critical part of the narrative, as it demonstrates personal growth and transformation.

Falling Action

Detail the events that follow the climax in the falling action. Show the consequences of your choices and explore how you grapple with the aftermath of the climax. This section should begin to wrap up your narrative while illustrating the lessons learned.

In the resolution, wrap up the main storyline and resolve any lingering conflicts or questions. Reflect on the journey you’ve shared, and explain how your experiences have shaped the person you are today.

Take time to reflect on the impact of your memoir and the lessons you’ve learned. Delve into your feelings and thoughts, and share how your life has changed as a result of your experiences.

Epilogue (optional)

An optional epilogue can be included to provide an update on your life or the lives of the characters in your memoir. It offers a sense of closure and allows readers to see how your story continues to unfold.

Themes of Memoir

Coming of age.

In this memoir theme, you write about your transformation from childhood to adulthood, focusing on pivotal moments that shaped your character and beliefs. You can explore various experiences, friendships, and learnings that helped you grow into the person you are today.

The theme of identity allows you to delve deep into your personal history, exploring how your cultural, ethnic, or religious background has shaped your life. This theme often tackles your struggles and milestones, as well as your acceptance and pride regarding your unique identity.

Survival-themed memoirs explore stories of resilience, whether in the face of adversity, trauma, or challenges. You can share your experiences of overcoming obstacles and the lessons learned through perseverance and determination.

Healing and Recovery

Memoirs with a healing and recovery theme display a journey toward inner peace and overcoming struggles with physical or emotional challenges. You can delve into your experiences navigating the healing process with honesty and vulnerability.

Love and Relationships

This theme focuses on the different relationships that have played a significant role in your life. You can write about romantic encounters, friendships, and family bonds you’ve shared over the years, along with the triumphs and tribulations that come with forming connections.

Journey and Transformation

Journey and transformation memoirs chronicle significant life changes and experiences that contributed to your growth. You can explore personal discoveries, epiphanies, or impactful events that transformed your view of the world or yourself.

Struggle and Resilience

By writing about personal struggles and resilience, you can share honest and raw accounts of the challenges you’ve faced and how you’ve overcome them. You can reveal the resilience and inner strength that carried you through difficult times.

Search for Meaning or Purpose

In this theme, you can express your inner quest to find meaning or purpose in life. You can share your philosophical reflections, spiritual awakenings, or life-changing lessons learned through personal search or exploration.

Cultural or Social Commentary

Cultural or social commentary memoirs give you the opportunity to discuss your personal experiences in a broader societal context. You can address issues of cultural identity, social norms, or broader historical events that affected you and your community.

Loss and Grief

A memoir about loss and grief provides an opportunity to explore the emotions and struggles you’ve faced in times of sorrow. You can share your journey of grief, the memories of your loved ones, and the impact they had on your life.

Types of Memoir

Personal memoir.

In a personal memoir, you focus on your own life experiences and emotions. You dive into specific moments, relationships, and challenges that have shaped your identity. Personal memoirs often reveal intimate details about a person’s life and thoughts as they recount those events.

Portrait Memoir

A portrait memoir focuses on the life of someone else. You, as the writer, can observe and reflect on the person’s experiences and give an account of their life, allowing readers to have a better understanding of that individual. It can be about someone you know closely or an admired figure you studied.

Coming-Of-Age Memoir

A coming-of-age memoir revolves around your journey from childhood to adulthood. It usually deals with major life events and transformations you face during adolescence. These memoirs often provide insights into the societal and cultural aspects of the time that influenced your growth and development.

Spiritual Quest Memoir

A spiritual quest memoir details your journey exploring spirituality and seeking meaningful answers to life’s biggest questions. It usually entails experiences with religious practices, beliefs, or spiritual teachers and the lessons learned from those encounters.

Travel Memoir

Travel memoirs are all about your adventures in different places. They involve your experiences and reflections while exploring new locations, cultures, and ways of living. These memoirs often provide vivid descriptions of the places you’ve visited, allowing readers to feel like they’re experiencing those journeys alongside you.

Confessional Memoir

A confessional memoir is characterized by its raw honesty and openness about your inner thoughts and darkest secrets. You share your emotions and vulnerabilities, allowing readers to connect with your personal challenges and triumphs. It can be therapeutic for the writer and provide comfort for the reader who may relate to those experiences.

Political Memoir

A political memoir covers your life in connection to your political career or beliefs. It focuses on your role in shaping or observing pivotal political events and movements during your lifetime. These memoirs offer a unique behind-the-scenes perspective on historical events and the individuals involved.

Public or Celebrity Memoir

Public or celebrity memoirs are written by or about well-known figures, exploring their lives and the experiences that led to their rise to fame or prominence. These memoirs often reveal previously untold stories and personal insights that help paint a more complete picture of the public figure.

Examples of Memoirs in Different Formats

Memoirs in books, film and television, graphic memoirs, memoirs in music, importance of memoir, memoir is a gateway to empathy.

Reading memoirs allows you to walk in another person’s shoes and glimpse their life experiences. By delving into their stories, you can develop empathy and better understand the challenges and emotions they have faced.

Memoir Provides Insight

Memoirs offer insights into the author’s thought processes, choices, and motivations. As you read, you may gain valuable lessons and inspiration that can be applied to your own life or the lives of those around you.

Memoir Acts as A Historical Record

Memoirs serve as personal accounts of historical events, providing a unique perspective that may not be captured in textbooks or mainstream media. They help preserve a piece of history, enriching your understanding of the world and its past.

Memoir Demonstrates Resilience

Memoirs often detail an individual’s journey through adversity and the triumphs they achieved along the way. These stories can inspire you to face your own challenges with courage and determination.

A Memoir Has Therapeutic Value

Writing or reading a memoir can be a cathartic process, allowing you to examine your own emotions, relationships, and experiences. This can lead to personal growth and healing.

Memoir Contributes to Cultural Preservation

Memoirs help preserve and pass on cultural heritage by documenting customs, traditions, and folklore. By reading and sharing memoirs, you can contribute to keeping these cultural aspects alive for future generations.

Memoir Builds Connection

Reading about someone’s life experiences can create a bond between you and the author, fostering a sense of connection. This can lead to increased empathy and understanding, not only towards the author but towards others as well.

Memoir Spurs Social Change

Memoirs can raise awareness of important issues and injustices, prompting readers to reconsider their own beliefs and take action. By sharing your story, you may inspire others to make a difference in their own communities.

Memoir Is an Exploration of Self

Writing a memoir requires reflection and introspection, leading to a deeper understanding of who you are, your values, and your experiences. As a reader, you may also identify with aspects of the author’s life, prompting self-discovery and personal growth.

Writing Your Own Memoir

Choosing a theme and focus.

When you start your memoir, it’s essential to identify a central theme or focus. Consider your life experiences and the key moments that have shaped you. It might be a period of personal transformation, a specific relationship, or a significant event.

With this theme in mind, narrow down the scope of your memoir to include only the most relevant experiences that directly contribute to your narrative. This will give your memoir a clear direction and make it more engaging for the reader.

Developing Your Writing Style

As an author, you need to find the best writing style to convey your memoir. An effective way to develop your writing style is by reading other memoirs and analyzing their narrative techniques. You can then experiment with different approaches, such as writing in the present or past tense, using first or third-person perspectives, and incorporating descriptive language.

Pay attention to the rhythm and pacing of your story as well. Maintaining a balance between introspective reflection and vivid descriptions of your experiences is crucial in keeping your readers engaged and invested in your memoir.

Publishing and Sharing

Once you’ve completed your memoir, it’s time to consider how you want to share it with the world. You have a few options for publishing, such as traditional publishing, self-publishing, or even posting your work online through a blog or website.

If you choose traditional publishing , you might need to find a literary agent to represent your work and submit it to publishers on your behalf. Do some research on the publishing industry and the types of memoirs that are currently successful, as this will give you an idea of what publishers are looking for in new authors.

Self-publishing , on the other hand, allows you more control over the creative process and content of your memoir. Platforms like Amazon’s Kindle Direct Publishing make it easy to publish your work, set your own pricing, and retain full rights to your story. This option may involve additional effort with formatting and marketing, but it also allows you to reach a wide audience quickly.

Sharing your memoir through a personal blog or website is another great way to connect with readers while maintaining creative control. You can build an online presence and interact directly with your audience, gathering feedback and fostering a community around your work.

Frequently Asked Questions

Do memoirs have to be written in the first person.

Yes, memoirs are typically written in the first person. As a memoir is a personal account of your own experiences, using the first-person perspective (I, me, my) help you convey the story more intimately to your readers.

This approach allows the readers to see events from your perspective and understand your emotions and thoughts throughout the journey.

What is the difference between a memoir and a personal essay?

While both memoirs and personal essays offer a deep dive into the author’s personal perspectives, they differ considerably in terms of their scope and depth.

A memoir typically focuses on a specific period, event, or theme in an individual’s life, spanning a larger timeframe and delving deeply into the author’s personal experiences. It’s story-driven and emphasizes the growth or transformation the author has undergone through these experiences.

In contrast, a personal essay generally has a broader scope, covering an array of topics, ideas, or reflections. It tends to be shorter in length and may focus on exploring a single idea, thought, or concept.

Unlike a memoir, a personal essay may not necessarily share a personal narrative. It could lean more towards being opinion-based or analytical, offering a distinctive viewpoint or critical analysis on a particular subject.

How truthful does a memoir need to be?

The process of writing a memoir calls for a commitment to truth, although minor discrepancies or narrative adjustments are generally accepted. The crucial aspect is to preserve the essential truth of your experiences and emotions.

In striving for accuracy, it’s important to adhere to the facts as you remember them without amplifying events or experiences for dramatic effect.

Honesty plays a pivotal role, requiring you to delve into your feelings, thoughts, and motivations during the incidents you’re describing. This earnest portrayal of your emotions imparts authenticity to your memoir, making it more relatable.

The memoir’s perspective should reflect that it’s grounded in your personal recollections and interpretations of events. However, it’s critical to understand and respect that others might remember or perceive the same events differently.

As we conclude this exploration into the world of memoirs, it’s clear to see the unique and powerful role they play in literature. With their potent blend of personal experience and broader insights, memoirs not only offer readers an intimate look into someone else’s life but also provide a mirror for them to reflect on their own experiences.

Whether you’re an aspiring writer, an avid reader, or simply a lover of stories, understanding memoirs enriches our grasp of the human experience in all its complexity. They remind us that every life is a narrative worth telling, full of lessons, growth, and profound moments that shape us. From the personal to the universal, memoirs are an enduring testament to our shared journey through life.

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Aerielle Ezra

What is memoir?

Everybody wants to write a memoir.

At least, everyone I meet, in my capacity as director of a creative writing organization. When I ask a new student about their writing goals, I hear I want to write a memoir more than anything else.

Why the pull to write a memoir? I feel like there is an easy answer here: we want to communicate the truth of our lives. We want to record what happened.

What IS memoir is a trickier question.

A memoir is not simply a life story. That’s an autobiography, and it’s bound by the linear chronology of one’s major events and milestones, a la Dickens’ David Copperfield , “Chapter 1: I am born.” However the memoirist chooses to rearrange the details, birth and death bookend a life story.

A memoir is more than a life story. There are dozens of quality definitions out there, but the one I return to over and over is the one I learned from our own Helena Clare Pittman, who says that a memoir is an exploration of one of our “soul themes.”

See, each of us could write three, four, eight, 10 memoirs, because each of us has more than one theme of our existence. One of my soul themes is motherhood. Another is being a writer, and another is being an abuse survivor. Some of us might have cancer survival as a soul theme. For others, it’s travel, food, a notorious ancestor, a unique experience, a difficult relationship, or the spotlight of fame or fortune. A soul theme is recurrent, a motif or pattern that becomes part of the fabric of our identity.

A good memoir makes one or more of our soul themes the backbone of the narrative. By this standard, some of the incidents and events that might be included in the biographies of our lives might not make it into this or that memoir. A memoir isn’t about recording everything that’s ever happened to us. It’s about building a narrative around a soul theme.

One of the first memoirs I really connected with was Molly Peacock’s Paradise, Piece by Piece . Peacock’s soul theme in this memoir is the decision not to have children. Every detail, every story, in the memoir builds up this theme for the reader. Of course, there is more than one soul theme: childhood abuse, alcoholism, grief, a pervasive feeling of being different and not belonging within one’s family—formative and painful experiences that often make us run headlong toward dysfunctional adult relationship and habits. Peacocks’ memoir is not about running away from or toward anything, but about learning to stand still and figure out who she is on her own terms (a writer, a teacher, a lover, a survivor). Every story, every turn of the narrative, contributes to the theme of I don’t want to have children of my own . It’s not a defense, nor is it a judgment of anyone else’s lifestyle or choices; it’s the story of making a decision over and over again, at different times in one’s life, and the experiences that inform that decision.

Mary Karr wrote three memoirs: The Liars’ Club, Cherry , and Lit . Each has a different soul theme. (Incidentally, Karr also wrote The Art of Memoir , which is a must-read for anyone interested in writing one themselves.)

A memoir writing exercise

So, how many different soul themes do you have?

Helena would have you make a list of them. Today, I want you to ask yourself the question, What is the dominant soul theme of my life? Think about it for up to 10 seconds and then write down the first thing that comes to mind.

Now, think about what it would be like to explain who you are to someone you’ve never met, according to this soul theme. How would you describe yourself in the third person (if I were doing it myself, I would say, She teaches at the Center for Creative Writing or She is the mom of a rock star nine-year-old , etc.)? And most importantly, what stories or anecdotes would you share with this other person about your life that build a narrative around your chosen soul theme?

Write a page or two where you explain your identity in terms of your most dominant soul theme to someone you don’t know. 

What did you think of this definition of memoir, or this way of thinking about how to write one? Will you try this writing exercise? Share with us in the comments.

Related reading: Learn and strengthen your writing voice

Writing in pieces: In defense of fragments over finished products

Writing emotional vs. literal truth

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