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Telling the Story of Yourself: 6 Steps to Writing Personal Narratives

Jennifer Xue

Table of Contents

Why do we write personal narratives, 6 guidelines for writing personal narrative essays, inspiring personal narratives, examples of personal narrative essays, tell your story.

First off, you might be wondering: what is a personal narrative? In short, personal narratives are stories we tell about ourselves that focus on our growth, lessons learned, and reflections on our experiences.

From stories about inspirational figures we heard as children to any essay, article, or exercise where we're asked to express opinions on a situation, thing, or individual—personal narratives are everywhere.

According to Psychology Today, personal narratives allow authors to feel and release pains, while savouring moments of strength and resilience. Such emotions provide an avenue for both authors and readers to connect while supporting healing in the process.

That all sounds great. But when it comes to putting the words down on paper, we often end up with a list of experiences and no real structure to tie them together.

In this article, we'll discuss what a personal narrative essay is further, learn the 6 steps to writing one, and look at some examples of great personal narratives.

As readers, we're fascinated by memoirs, autobiographies, and long-form personal narrative articles, as they provide a glimpse into the authors' thought processes, ideas, and feelings. But you don't have to be writing your whole life story to create a personal narrative.

You might be a student writing an admissions essay , or be trying to tell your professional story in a cover letter. Regardless of your purpose, your narrative will focus on personal growth, reflections, and lessons.

Personal narratives help us connect with other people's stories due to their easy-to-digest format and because humans are empathising creatures.

We can better understand how others feel and think when we were told stories that allow us to see the world from their perspectives. The author's "I think" and "I feel" instantaneously become ours, as the brain doesn't know whether what we read is real or imaginary.

In her best-selling book Wired for Story, Lisa Cron explains that the human brain craves tales as it's hard-wired through evolution to learn what happens next. Since the brain doesn't know whether what you are reading is actual or not, we can register the moral of the story cognitively and affectively.

In academia, a narrative essay tells a story which is experiential, anecdotal, or personal. It allows the author to creatively express their thoughts, feelings, ideas, and opinions. Its length can be anywhere from a few paragraphs to hundreds of pages.

Outside of academia, personal narratives are known as a form of journalism or non-fiction works called "narrative journalism." Even highly prestigious publications like the New York Times and Time magazine have sections dedicated to personal narratives. The New Yorke is a magazine dedicated solely to this genre.

The New York Times holds personal narrative essay contests. The winners are selected because they:

had a clear narrative arc with a conflict and a main character who changed in some way. They artfully balanced the action of the story with reflection on what it meant to the writer. They took risks, like including dialogue or playing with punctuation, sentence structure and word choice to develop a strong voice. And, perhaps most important, they focused on a specific moment or theme – a conversation, a trip to the mall, a speech tournament, a hospital visit – instead of trying to sum up the writer’s life in 600 words.

In a nutshell, a personal narrative can cover any reflective and contemplative subject with a strong voice and a unique perspective, including uncommon private values. It's written in first person and the story encompasses a specific moment in time worthy of a discussion.

Writing a personal narrative essay involves both objectivity and subjectivity. You'll need to be objective enough to recognise the importance of an event or a situation to explore and write about. On the other hand, you must be subjective enough to inject private thoughts and feelings to make your point.

With personal narratives, you are both the muse and the creator – you have control over how your story is told. However, like any other type of writing, it comes with guidelines.

1. Write Your Personal Narrative as a Story

As a story, it must include an introduction, characters, plot, setting, climax, anti-climax (if any), and conclusion. Another way to approach it is by structuring it with an introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should set the tone, while the body should focus on the key point(s) you want to get across. The conclusion can tell the reader what lessons you have learned from the story you've just told.

2. Give Your Personal Narrative a Clear Purpose

Your narrative essay should reflect your unique perspective on life. This is a lot harder than it sounds. You need to establish your perspective, the key things you want your reader to take away, and your tone of voice. It's a good idea to have a set purpose in mind for the narrative before you start writing.

Let's say you want to write about how you manage depression without taking any medicine. This could go in any number of ways, but isolating a purpose will help you focus your writing and choose which stories to tell. Are you advocating for a holistic approach, or do you want to describe your emotional experience for people thinking of trying it?

Having this focus will allow you to put your own unique take on what you did (and didn't do, if applicable), what changed you, and the lessons learned along the way.

3. Show, Don't Tell

It's a narration, so the narrative should show readers what happened, instead of telling them. As well as being a storyteller, the author should take part as one of the characters. Keep this in mind when writing, as the way you shape your perspective can have a big impact on how your reader sees your overarching plot. Don't slip into just explaining everything that happened because it happened to you. Show your reader with action.

You can check for instances of telling rather than showing with ProWritingAid. For example, instead of:

"You never let me do anything!" I cried disdainfully.

"You never let me do anything!" To this day, my mother swears that the glare I levelled at her as I spat those words out could have soured milk.

Using ProWritingAid will help you find these instances in your manuscript and edit them without spending hours trawling through your work yourself.

4. Use "I," But Don't Overuse It

You, the author, take ownership of the story, so the first person pronoun "I" is used throughout. However, you shouldn't overuse it, as it'd make it sound too self-centred and redundant.

ProWritingAid can also help you here – the Style Report will tell you if you've started too many sentences with "I", and show you how to introduce more variation in your writing.

5. Pay Attention to Tenses

Tense is key to understanding. Personal narratives mostly tell the story of events that happened in the past, so many authors choose to use the past tense. This helps separate out your current, narrating voice and your past self who you are narrating. If you're writing in the present tense, make sure that you keep it consistent throughout.

6. Make Your Conclusion Satisfying

Satisfy your readers by giving them an unforgettable closing scene. The body of the narration should build up the plot to climax. This doesn't have to be something incredible or shocking, just something that helps give an interesting take on your story.

The takeaways or the lessons learned should be written without lecturing. Whenever possible, continue to show rather than tell. Don't say what you learned, narrate what you do differently now. This will help the moral of your story shine through without being too preachy.

GoodReads is a great starting point for selecting read-worthy personal narrative books. Here are five of my favourites.

Owl Moon by Jane Yolen

Jane Yolen, the author of 386 books, wrote this poetic story about a daughter and her father who went owling. Instead of learning about owls, Yolen invites readers to contemplate the meaning of gentleness and hope.

Night by Elie Wiesel

Elie Wiesel was a teenager when he and his family were sent to Auschwitz concentration camp in 1944. This Holocaust memoir has a strong message that such horrific events should never be repeated.

The Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank

This classic is a must-read by young and old alike. It's a remarkable diary by a 13-year-old Jewish girl who hid inside a secret annexe of an old building during the Nazi occupation of the Netherlands in 1942.

The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion

This is a personal narrative written by a brave author renowned for her clarity, passion, and honesty. Didion shares how in December 2003, she lost her husband of 40 years to a massive heart attack and dealt with the acute illness of her only daughter. She speaks about grief, memories, illness, and hope.

Educated by Tara Westover

Author Tara Westover was raised by survivalist parents. She didn't go to school until 17 years of age, which later took her to Harvard and Cambridge. It's a story about the struggle for quest for knowledge and self-reinvention.

Narrative and personal narrative journalism are gaining more popularity these days. You can find distinguished personal narratives all over the web.

Curating the best of the best of personal narratives and narrative essays from all over the web. Some are award-winning articles.

Narratively

Long-form writing to celebrate humanity through storytelling. It publishes personal narrative essays written to provoke, inspire, and reflect, touching lesser-known and overlooked subjects.

Narrative Magazine

It publishes non,fiction narratives, poetry, and fiction. Among its contributors is Frank Conroy, the author of Stop-Time , a memoir that has never been out of print since 1967.

Thought Catalog

Aimed at Generation Z, it publishes personal narrative essays on self-improvement, family, friendship, romance, and others.

Personal narratives will continue to be popular as our brains are wired for stories. We love reading about others and telling stories of ourselves, as they bring satisfaction and a better understanding of the world around us.

Personal narratives make us better humans. Enjoy telling yours!

Write like a bestselling author

Love writing? ProWritingAid will help you improve the style, strength, and clarity of your stories.

Jennifer Xue is an award-winning e-book author with 2,500+ articles and 100+ e-books/reports published under her belt. She also taught 50+ college-level essay and paper writing classes. Her byline has appeared in Forbes, Fortune, Cosmopolitan, Esquire, Business.com, Business2Community, Addicted2Success, Good Men Project, and others. Her blog is JenniferXue.com. Follow her on Twitter @jenxuewrites].

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How to Write a Personal Narrative like a Pro (With Examples)

Last Updated: December 12, 2023 Fact Checked

Template and Sample Narrative

• Brainstorming

This article was co-authored by Grant Faulkner, MA . Grant Faulkner is the Executive Director of National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo) and the co-founder of 100 Word Story, a literary magazine. Grant has published two books on writing and has been published in The New York Times and Writer’s Digest. He co-hosts Write-minded, a weekly podcast on writing and publishing, and has a M.A. in Creative Writing from San Francisco State University.  There are 7 references cited in this article, which can be found at the bottom of the page. This article has been fact-checked, ensuring the accuracy of any cited facts and confirming the authority of its sources. This article has been viewed 863,248 times.

Personal narratives focus on a particular real life event that was pivotal or important for the writer. You may have to write a personal narrative as part of a college application or as an assignment for a class. To write a strong personal narrative, start by coming up with an engaging idea. Then, write the narrative with an opening hook and a detailed, organized structure. Always review and revise the personal narrative before handing it in so it is at its best.

Things You Should Know

• Center your narrative around an important moment in your life. For example, you might write about a time you had to make a hard decision or deal with a conflict.
• Move chronologically through the events you’re discussing. This will make your narrative easy to follow and draw your reader in.
• Finish with a moral takeaway or a life lesson. What did you learn from these events, and why is it important? How did they shape you as a person?

Brainstorming Ideas for the Narrative

• For example, you may write about your struggles with body image in high school and how you overcame them in adulthood. Or you may write about your disastrous 15th birthday party and how it affected your relationship with your mother.

• For example, you write a personal narrative about your complicated relationship with your birth mother. Or you may write about a conflict you have with a sport you play or a club you are a part of.

• For example, you may explore a theme like poverty by writing about your family’s struggle with money and finances. You may write about having to defer college applications to work at your parent’s business to make ends meet for your family.

• The Boys of My Youth by Jo Ann Beard
• Slouching Towards Bethlehem by Joan Didion
• Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
• The Lives section of The New York Times

Writing the Personal Narrative

• For example, the first line in the personal narrative by Tony Gervino is attention grabbing: “I was 6 when my brother John leaned across the kitchen table and casually whispered that he had killed Santa Claus.” [5] X Research source

• For example, in Tony Gervino’s essay, he sets the scene by providing setting, character, and narrative voice: “It was July 1973, we were living in Scarsdale, N.Y., and he was four years older than I was, although that seemed like decades.”

• For example, you may start with an event in childhood with your older sister and then move forward in time to the present day, focusing on you and your older sister as adults.

• For example, you may describe the feeling of your mother’s famous lemon cake as “rich and zesty, with a special ingredient that to this day, I cannot identify.”

• For example, you may end a personal narrative about your complicated relationship with your troubled sister by ending on a recent memory where you both enjoyed each other’s company. You may leave the reader with a lesson you have learned about loving someone, even with all their messiness and baggage.

Polishing the Personal Narrative

• You can also try reading the narrative out loud to someone else so they can hear how it sounds. This can then make it easier for them to give you feedback.

• Be willing to accept feedback from others. Be open to constructive criticism as it will likely strengthen the narrative.

Community Q&A

You Might Also Like

• How to Write a Narrative Essay
• How to Write a Journal Entry
• How to Write an Epistolary Narrative
• How to Write an Autobiography
• ↑ https://www.indeed.com/career-advice/career-development/personal-narrative-examples
• ↑ https://www.byrdseed.com/writing-better-personal-narratives/
• ↑ https://grammar.yourdictionary.com/grammar-rules-and-tips/tips-for-writing-a-personal-narrative-essay.html
• ↑ https://www.nytimes.com/2011/07/17/magazine/lives-a-rats-tale.html
• ↑ https://open.lib.umn.edu/writingforsuccess/chapter/10-1-narration/
• ↑ https://writingcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/reading-aloud/
• ↑ https://writingcenter.unc.edu/tips-and-tools/revising-drafts/

About This Article

To write a personal narrative, start by choosing a memorable moment, event, or conflict in your life that you want to write about. Then, use your personal narrative to describe your story, going chronologically through the events. Try to use a lot of sensory detail, like how things smelled, sounded, felt, and looked, so your readers can picture everything you're describing. At the end of your narrative, include a lesson you learned or something you took away from the experience. To learn how to brainstorm ideas for your personal narrative, read on! Did this summary help you? Yes No

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Writing a Personal Narrative

Sep 02, 2014

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Writing a Personal Narrative. Narrative – A spoken or written account of connected events; a story. A Personal Narrative:. Is an interesting story about you – the writer! (The narrator is the person who tells the story, either through writing or speaking.)

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• good transitions
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Writing a Personal Narrative Narrative – A spoken or written account of connected events; a story.

A Personal Narrative: • Is an interesting story about you – the writer! • (The narrator is the person who tells the story, either • through writing or speaking.) • Is written in the first person (using the pronouns I, me, and my. • Presents events in a clear order. • Uses details to help readers see people, places, and events. • Shows how the writer feels about the experience and why it is meaningful to him or her.

What to Write About • A memorable event • A good time • A bad time • An important time • A first time • A last time

What to Write About Remember, your narrative does not need to be about an extraordinary event. Just make sure that it is about an experience that is interesting and important to you!

How to Start Think of a topic – your personal experience that you want to share. List several events and details that you want to include in your story. Put the events in chronological (time) order.

Writing your Story Write a topic sentence that clearly introduces the purpose of your narrative. Connect your events using good transitions. Use vivid1 details to describe the characters and events in your narrative. 1Vivid – producing powerful feelings or strong, clear images in the mind.

Writing a Vivid Sentence “I was so embarrassed that my face turned red.” “I was so embarrassed that my face turned as red as a tomato!”

Writing your Story Try to recreate the events as they happened, rather than simply telling about them. Sometimes it’s OK to use dialogue to make the story more interesting for the readers. Make sure your narrative includes: a plot – including setting and characters – a climax, and an ending.

Finishing your Story Review your story. Read it aloud to yourself or a partner. Did the introduction capture your attention? Is the order of events clear? Did you include good transitions? Did you use vivid details? Does the conclusion finish the story appropriately?

Practice: Is this an interesting topic sentence? Once I almost drowned. It’s a good start, but not enough details. X

When Robert was fifteen, he made his first gift of true love to his father. ✓

A journey of 1 mile or 5000 miles begins the same way: with a single step. This sentence might be a good beginning for an essay, but not for a personal narrative. We don’t really know what the story will be about. X

When I was five, I discovered that learning was fun. ✓

The 5-minute drive to the hospital seemed to have taken hours. What’s the central idea of the narrative? X

He was driving home one evening, on a two-lane country road. What’s the central idea of the narrative? X

Xiao Wang has proved once again that he is an incurable optimist. Not too bad, but a little bit more detail would be nice. ✓

The day I got the letter of admission from BFSU (Beijing Foreign Studies University) was one of the happiest of my life. Great! ✓

My family believed that if something went wrong, it was always someone else’s fault. A good start to an essay, but not a personal narrative. X

One of my most memorable experiences took place when I worked as a school teacher in a mountain village. Excellent! Lots of details. We know the writer’s role (school teacher) and the setting (mountain village). ✓

Transitions Time/Order – Later (on), a little bit later, soon, while, when, (shortly) afterward, after that, shortly thereafter, before, then, subsequently, the next day. Importance – First, next, finally, most of all, more importantly, last but not least. Cause & Effect – Because, since, for, so, therefore, as a result, consequently. Comparison – Similarly, in the same way, unlike, on the other hand, nevertheless Examples – For example, for instance, such as, like, in other words, along with

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Personal Narrative Essay Writing - Presentation, Graphic Organizers, and Rubric

What educators are saying

Description.

Personal Narrative Essay Writing - Presentation, Graphic Organizers, and Rubric: Help your students tell a story from their lives using this engaging personal narrative essay writing resource. This lesson includes a detailed presentation, a fun stations activity, engaging graphic organizers, a writing checklist, and a teacher rubric, so you will have absolutely everything to empower your students they need to navigate the personal narrative essay format successfully. Elevate your students' storytelling skills with this all-in-one resource for narrative essay writing!

Included in This Personal Narrative Essay Writing Resource:

➡️ Personal Narrative Essay Presentation Slides: Use this 24-slide PowerPoint presentation to guide you through the entire lesson and walk students through all aspects of writing a personal narrative.

➡️ Personal Narrative Topic Brainstorming Stations Activity: Use this fun stations discussion activity to help your students select a topic for their personal narrative. The activity includes task cards and a brainstorming page.

➡️ Personal Narrative Pre-Writing Graphic Organizers: Students will use these pre-writing graphic organizers during the early stages of writing their personal narrative. The graphic organizers will allow students to consider characters, conflict, setting, background information, theme, and plot before they write.

➡️ Personal Narrative Peer Editing Checklist: After students have completed their rough draft, they will complete a peer editing checklist for a partner to help them with effective and practical feedback for improvement

➡️ Personal Narrative Writing Rubric: This easy-to-use rubric will make grading your students' personal narrative essay writing quick and easy. There is an editable version included as well.

What Teachers Are Saying About This Personal Narrative Essay Writing Resource:

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ This was such a great breakdown of a personal narrative . It made it easy for the students to understand how to write their paper.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ This is a great resource - excellent way to introduce personal narrative writing to my students. Very good details and even a great extra activity to help students think of ideas to write about.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ These resources guided students through the narrative writing process with ease. The graphic organizers were helpful and the prompts helped students come up with ideas.

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Narrative Essays

Narrative: The spoken or written account of connected events; a story

Narrative Introductions

The introduction of a narrative essay sets the scene for the story that follows. Interesting introductions—for any kind of writing—engage and draw readers in because they want to know more.

Since narratives tell a story and involve events, the introduction of a narrative quite often starts in the middle of the action in order to bring the reader into the story immediately, as shown in examples 1, 3, and 5 below. Other effective introductions briefly provide background for the point of the story—often the lesson learned—as in 4 below and the first example on the reverse side.

Below are some strategies for writing effective openings. Remember your introduction should be interesting and draw your reader in. It should make your audience want to read more. If it's a person , begin with a description of the person and then say why that person mattered. If it's an event , begin with the action or begin by reflecting back on why the event mattered, then go into the narrative.

• "Potter...take off!" my coach yelled as I was cracking yet another joke during practice.
• Why do such a small percentage of high school athletes play Division One sports?
• It was a cold, rainy night, under the lights on the field. I lined up the ball on the penalty line under the wet grass. After glancing up at the tied score, I stared into the goalkeeper's eyes.
• My heart pounds in my chest. My stomach full of nervous butterflies. I hear the crowd talking and names being cheered.
• Slipping the red and white uniform over my head for the first time is a feeling I will never forget.
• "No football." Those words rang in my head for hours as I thought about what a stupid decision I had made three nights before.
• "SNAP!" I heard the startling sound of my left knee before I ever felt the pain.
• According to the NCAA, there are over 400,000 student-athletes in the United States.

Narrative Story

• Unified: Ensure all actions in your story develop a central idea or argument.
• Interesting: Draw your readers into your scene(s), making them feel as if they're experiencing them first-hand.
• Coherent: Indicate changes in time, location, and characters clearly (even if your story is not chronological).
• Climactic: Include a moment (the climax) when your ending is revealed or the importance of events is made clear.
• Remember the 5 W's : Who? What? When? Where? Why?
• Write vividly : Include significant sensory information in the scene (sight, sound, touch, smell, taste) to make readers feel they are there
• Develop " Thick Descriptions "

Clifford Geertz describes thick descriptions as accounts that include not only facts but also commentary and interpretation . The goal is to vividly describe an action or scene, often through the use of metaphors, analogies, and other forms of interpretation that can emote strong feelings and images in your readers' minds.

"The flatness of the Delta made the shack, the quarters, and the railroad tracks nearby seem like some tabletop model train set. Like many Mississippi shacks, this one looked as if no one had lived there since the birth of the blues. Four sunflowers leaned alongside a sagging porch. When the front door creaked open, cockroaches bigger than pecans scurried for cover [...] walls wept with mildew."

—from Bruce Watson's Freedom Summer

Narrative Checklist

• Does the story have a clear and unifying idea? If not, what could that idea be?
• If the story doesn't include a thesis sentence, is the unifying idea of the story clear without it?
• Is the story unified, with all the details contributing to the central idea?
• Is the story arranged chronologically? If not, is the organization of ideas and events still effective and clear?
• Do the transitions show the movement from idea to idea and scene to scene?
• Are there enough details?
• Is there dialogue at important moments?
• Is there a climax to the story—moment at which the action is resolved or a key idea is revealed?

501 E. High Street Oxford, OH 45056

• Online: Miami Online
• Main Operator 513-529-1809
• Office of Admission 513-529-2531
• Vine Hotline 513-529-6400
• Emergency Info https://miamioh.edu/emergency

1601 University Blvd. Hamilton, OH 45011

• Online: E-Campus
• Main Operator 513-785-3000
• Office of Admission 513-785-3111
• Campus Status Line 513-785-3077
• Emergency Info https://miamioh.edu/regionals/emergency

4200 N. University Blvd. Middletown, OH 45042

• Main Operator 513-727-3200
• Office of Admission 513-727-3216
• Campus Status 513-727-3477

7847 VOA Park Dr. (Corner of VOA Park Dr. and Cox Rd.) West Chester, OH 45069

• Main Operator 513-895-8862
• From Middletown 513-217-8862

Chateau de Differdange 1, Impasse du Chateau, L-4524 Differdange Grand Duchy of Luxembourg

• Main Operator 011-352-582222-1
• Email [email protected]
• Website https://miamioh.edu/luxembourg

217-222 MacMillan Hall 501 E. Spring St. Oxford, OH 45056, USA

• Main Operator 513-529-8600

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