3
Most of the content is relevant and the target reader is informed.
There should be more of a balance of the arguments with a bit more focus on the nursery.
You are also over the word limit so I would suggest writing fewer points with more backing up. Perhaps you could shorten the introduction.
The target reader would be able to reach a decision following as a result of your arguments.
3
The conventions of essay writing have been used.
Some of your points could be strengthened with further examples and evidence. Fewer points with more justification would be good.
The tone of the essay is generally appropriate and the use of a title is also appropriate.
Although the essay is quite easy to follow, some of the language could be tailored more precisely towards the wording of the question. This would help to communicate your ideas more clearly.
4
The essay is well organised and quite coherent.
Each paragraph focusses on a separate argument. Within the paragraphs there are good organisational patterns used to emphasise certain points 'but, above all...' or to show contrast 'Unfortunately, on the other hand...'
2
There is a good range of vocabulary and grammatical structures used appropriately, 'Usually, it was the mother, who had to leave her job...'
However there are also quite a few errors where a more appropriate word could have been used. The choice of words at times detracts from how closely your answer ties to the question.
There are a range of linking devices used appropriately, 'furthermore', 'another solution could be', 'on the other hand'. There are also some errors 'advantages in this approach' but these do not impede communication.
Adding the marks together, the student has scored:
Content: 3/5
Communicative Achievement: 3/5
Organisation: 4/5
Language: 2/5
Total: 12/20.
If you can't remember what these scores mean, watch my CAE writing marking criteria video .
If this student got 12/20 for their part 2 writing in the exam, they would have 24/40 for the C1 Advanced writing paper.
The student would therefore pass this exam paper.
To understand how these marks are calculated, check out this page . I suggest using a table like this to mark your scores when you are practising for all the different exam papers.
This question has come from ' Cambridge English Advanced Practice Tests - Plus 2 ' by Nick Kenny and Jacky Newbrook.
While you read this example answer, you should write down any mistakes you find on this document , then complete the examiner assessment template below:
Online template
Hard copy Assessment Scale Template
Example Answer Download
If you haven't done it yet, download this assessment template here , or complete it online here with your thoughts on the writing above.
Here is the student's answer with my corrections and comments written in ( bold and italics).
Nowadays , many young people tend to ask themselves how valuable is the benefit of taking part in sport competitions in which they participate ( I don’t think these words add any extra to the sentence) . It is said that ‘ it’ ( after using the phrase ‘it is said/thought that’ you should repeat the subject) is worth y (you should use ‘worth’ here) for healthy people to hav ing a positive attitude and th is (the attitude) are also usually able to contribute s more to a the healthy mind.
But which point s can be highlighted as valuable from ‘ having’ healthy lifestyles? (Personally, I wouldn’t ask questions in an essay). Not only ‘ does’ physical condition ha ve a very important role to play, but also mental condition might be affected ‘ as a result’ . This (what starts at the beginning?) starts at the beginning (the beginning of what?) when the young child can learn about the value of exercise. Despite having a fit ness body, this (what is ‘this’?) should not only be aimed at sport s competition s . They need to have continuous ‘win nings and los ses ings ’ in order to understand the importance of being trained mentally ( I think the argument of the essay disappears a bit here). For instance, Usain Bolt is an excellent athlete thanks to ‘ his’ capability to accept to los s e s and train hard for the next sport competition.
Attitude alone, however, is not enough. Young athletes need to have easy access to resources which will enable them to learn in a better way. There is no point in having a great attitude to learn if they cannot find materials that other athletes can share as tips in order to make the difference. In this case, these materials refer s to personal experiences and train ing methods ed abilities which youngsters need to pay more attention ‘to’ . If cooperation is not performed (we don’t normally ‘perform cooperation’, it would be more common to say ‘if cooperation does not exist’ , young people are all too likely to slip into bad habits (this paragraph is well written) .
To sum up, of the two values outlined above, healthy lifestyles is the more effective one. lt is more far reaching in that it relates to all aspects of living healthily. In addition to this, after all, through (‘developing the right’) attitude , that a person will learn why it is better to go to a sport competition than to lie on a couch in front of the television. (I don’t think I understand this final sentence. Do you mean attitude will teach a person? I probably wouldn’t introduce a new idea into the final sentence of an essay).
Below, you can read my critique on the examiner assessment scale...
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This student has scored:
Communicative Achievement: 2/5
Organisation: 3/5
Language: 3/5
Total: 11/20.
If this student got 11/20 for their part 2 writing in the exam, they would score 22 out of 40 and they would not pass the CAE writing exam at a C1 level.
The student might still pass the exam if he/she gets higher marks in the other exam papers, Reading , Use of English , Speaking and Listening .
Let's have a look at another example essay that a student sent to me. Similar to the first two, we'll have a look at the question, answer and my feedback.
Fantastic work if you've made it this far...you're really going to be helping yourself prepare for this tricky part of the exam. High five!
The following question can be found on this website .
While reading the next answer, you should complete the assessment scale. You can download the assessment template here or complete this online version .
CAE Essay Examples - Answer 3 pdf
Okay, so hopefully you've completed the hard copy or the online examiner assessment template with your marks and comments. Before reading my corrections below, you should now write down any mistakes you find on this document.
We live in a wor ’l’ d where there are so many options for travelling (Spelling mistakes are not a huge issue, but they are important if they disrupt the flow/meaning of your writing. This spelling mistake is in the first sentence and therefore might put negative thinking in the examiner’s mind) . According to a recent article, there has been an increase in international travelling. Since the article did not find the major causes of what is causing this new trend (can you think of a way to avoid saying ‘causes’ and ‘causing’ in the same sentence?) , I decided to raise two crucially important factors which could presumably contribute to this.
It cannot be denied that we take most means of transport for granted and flying on a plane is becoming more prevalent (Good sentence) . In comparison to the previous century, the cost of airline tickets has noticeably decreased. In other words, most airlines are now aiming at a wide ’r’ range of ‘people’ public . (We don’t often say ‘a range of public.’) Not only do they want to attract the affluent, but they also want to ensure that even the poorest citizens can afford to buy a ticket. Moreover, the convenience of aircraft also plays a vital role as flying is not so time-consuming. (Good paragraph).
Another potential factor is global business and trade. The majority of successful companies, such as Foxconn and Apple, are spread out into ‘across’ the whole world. If they did not do this, they would not be able to satisfy their customers. Therefore, they often have no other option, but to dispatch (‘dispatch’ is not often a word used for people but more for inanimate objects) their representatives , (remember the comma as this is a non-definite relative clause because the next part of the sentence is extra information) who always travel by plane. Secondly, the world economy has reached its peak, that is to say, our population is buying more cars. (I think this point would be made stronger by adding another sentence.)
To sum up, as far as I am concerned, global business plays a bigger role when it comes to the increase in travelling. Despite the fact that means of transport have changed, companies have a major impact. To make it clear, companies have the power to shape our society. We are under the influence of them. They set down the rules in terms of new trends in our society (I think you could combine the final two sentences and avoid repeating the words ‘our society’) .
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I have awarded the essay the following marks:
Content - 3 Communicative Achievement - 4 Organisation - 4 Language - 4
Total: 15/20
In my opinion, this is a good essay. Remember you only have 90 minutes to complete 2 writing tasks in the exam, but if you could write this and a similar part 2 answer in 35 minutes each, leaving time for planning and checking, I think you will stand a good chance of passing at a C1 level. The examiners tend to mark the writing paper quite strictly in my experience and so it’s possible that some of the marking criteria could be awarded a 3, but it’s also possible some could be awarded a 5. It depends a little bit on the individual examiner. Well done!
This came from the book ' Cambridge English Advanced 2 ' which you can buy here >>
You should print off a copy of the answer below here and write down any mistakes you find.
Alternatively, you can write the mistakes on a separate sheet of paper or on this online template .
You should also complete the examiner assessment scale template in hardcopy or online .
Here is a video of me critiquing this answer:
If you would like to receive a similar video critiquing one of your answers, check out my CAE writing assessment service >>
Below, you can read the answer with my corrections and what I wrote on the examiner assessment scale...
Social trends are part of today’s society and they could be described as peculiar behaviours that become ‘a’ fundamental characteristic of a society. In the last few years there have been many changes such as the development of ‘the’ internet, mobile phones and cheaper flights that have had an important influence in ‘on’ social trends.
As far as I’m concerned, the factor which influence ‘s’ the most social trends ‘the most’ is the communication and especially the new communication via social network ‘s’ . As a matter of fact s , the way we communicate has been influenced a lot by the development of ‘the’ internet and technology. Therefore, internationally widespread social networks such as Twitter, Instagram and TikTok have created ways of communicating that make it very easy to spread a peculiar ‘specific’ social trend by imitat ‘ing’ e the trends of other countries.
Other people may say that advertising is shaping social trends because of its u ‘i’ nescapable influence on consumers. Although it surely plays an important role and everywhere we go we are surrounded by advertising, in my humble opinion , we are totally used to them and we know how to ignore them, so they don’t ‘ do not’ have such a big influence on social trends.
In conclusion , it ’s ‘i s evident that what influence ‘s’ ‘social trends’ the most social trends are the ways of communicating used by the people of today. They have the ‘ability’ peculiarity to make the world smaller and spread a new trend amazingly rapidly with the feature that it will affect a big amount ‘number’ of people in a small amount of time.
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| 3 | All parts of the question have been adequately addressed. The target reader can see which of the two points the writer is discussing in the essay. It is also clear which point the writer thinks has the biggest influence on social trends. The first main point about communication could be made slightly stronger. |
| 3 | The writing could be slightly easier to follow at times, for example in the conclusion. This would also help keep the target reader engaged. There are one or two places in the essay where the arguments could be expanded and strengthened to help the target reader follow and understand the main points. |
| 4 | Some words and phrases have been used to start new paragraphs but also to connect ideas within a paragraph, helping maintain a good structure and also to express your ideas and opinions, for example: ‘Therefore’ The whole essay has a good structure. |
| 2 | There is evidence of different and a variety of grammatical structures, for example, the present perfect. It would be good to see you attempting some more complex grammatical structures. There are some less common words and phrases used, for example: ‘Peculiar’ ‘Fundamental characteristic’ However, there is some repetition of certain words where there is opportunity to show more variety and a wider knowledge of the English language. There are a few small errors, for example, using an incorrect preposition or missing articles. Some of the language is slightly too informal for an essay. |
Content - 3
Communicative Achievement - 3
Organisation - 4
Language - 2
Total: 12/20
You need a minimum of 24 out of 40 possible marks to pass the CAE writing paper. Remember, there are 2 different writings to complete, so you need to average 12 out of 20 for each writing task.
Remember, you do not need to pass every exam paper in order to pass the C1 Advanced (CAE) exam and get a certificate.
If you want to find out more about what marks you need in order to pass the exam, have a look at this page >>
I recently published a book with 6 CAE essay examples and 15 other CAE sample writings. They all have my mistakes and suggestions highlighted, as well as critique based on official writing marking criteria.
Some of you can read it for free with Kindle Unlimited:
Take a look inside >>
Register to start the course below >>
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Format: cae writing paper contains two parts. Timing: 1 hour 30 minutes
Parts: 2 Task: candidates are required to complete two tasks:
A range from the following: email/letter; essay; report; review; proposal
Your essay should be organised well, including an introduction, supporting paragraphs and a compelling conclusion. The composition should capture the reader’s attention and express sophisticated ideas using a range of stylistic structures and vocabulary.
You will be asked to explain which of the two points is more important and to express reasons for your viewpoint. Your essay should include a well-organised introduction, supporting paragraphs and an appropriate conclusion.
How much do I have to write? 220–260 words.
C1 advanced (cae) writing: part 2 – one task from three.
You write a text from a choice of text types – letter/email, proposal, report or review. To guide your writing, you’ll be given information about context, topic purpose and target reader How much do I have to write? 220–260 words.
Practice, write & improve, c1 advanced (cae) writing: part 2 – types of writing.
The different types of tasks that may appear on the CAE writing exam endeavour to establish frameworks for candidates to develop their ideas on a topic with a purpose for writing and a target reader in mind.
is written for a group of contemporaries like club members or colleagues. Candidates will be expected to make suggestions backed by facts to persuade their readers.
How to write a proposal? | C1 Advanced (CAE)
is written to respond to a situation outlined in the question reflecting the appropriate register and tone for the specified target reader. Candidates are asked to develop correspondence to, for example, an English-speaking friend or colleague, a potential employer, a college principal or a magazine editor.
is always written for a teacher. lt should address the prompt provided in terms of addressing both content points and providing a new viewpoint of the writer’s own. The essay should be well developed with an introduction, appropriate conclusion as well as w ritten in an appropriate register and tone.
How to write an essay? | C1 Advanced (CAE)
is usually developed for a superior (e.g. a teacher) or a peer group (e.g. members of an English club). The question identifies the subject of the composition and the areas to be covered. Candidates must provide some factual information and make recommendations, but there is space for them to incorporate their own ideas and experiences.
How to write a report? | C1 Advanced (CAE)
is written traditionally for an English-language magazine, newspaper or website. The main purpose is to describe and express a personal opinion about something which the writer has experienced (e.g. a film, a holiday. a product, a website etc.) and to give the reader a clear impression of what the item discussed is like. Description and explanation are key functions for this task and a review will normally include a recommendation to the reader.
How to write a review? | C1 Advanced (CAE)
As you can see, C1 writing is not that easy at all. See what are the most common mistakes you should avoid.
Certificate in advanced english (cae).
The themes/topics covered in each writing paper can be found below each link.
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test One Reducing traffic / review, letter, report Exercise Number: CAE067
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Two Local TV station / letter, proposal, report Exercise Number: CAE068
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Three Protecting the environment / report, email, review Exercise Number: CAE069
to help you improve your English! Grammar explanations. and . - First, Advanced, Proficiency, IELTS, TOEFL materials. , imaginative quizzes and games. . Track your progress as your English ! ! | ||
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Four Working from home / report, proposal, letter Exercise Number: CAE070
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Five Spending government money / review, letter, report Exercise Number: CAE071
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Six New school subject / review, email, report Exercise Number: CAE072
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Seven School speech giver / review, email, report. Exercise Number: CAE073
Cambridge C1 English Advanced (CAE) Writing - Test Eight Local town economy / email, proposal, review. Exercise Number: CAE074
Use of English: Ten practice tests for the Cambridge C1 Advanced | See in UK
Cambridge English Qualifications: C1 Advanced Volume 1 Practice Tests Plus with key | See in UK
Grammar and Vocabulary for Advanced Book with Answers and Audio | See in UK
Cambridge English Advanced 1 for Revised Exam - Student's Book with Answers: Authentic Examination Papers | See in UK
CAE Writing Masterclass (Parts 1 & 2) Cambridge English Advanced Writing | See in UK
Grammar & Vocabulary CAE & CPE Workbook With Key | See in UK
Listening exercises.
Here you have some useful phrases for your essays (advanced level). Hope you like it and find it useful !!
Introducing the phenomenon to be discussed
Stating your opinion
Changing topic
Presenting arguments
Describing causes
Proposing steps and measures
I think you should also have a few pages somewhere where you can keep a record of other useful essay phrases that you come across in your reading. Write them down and practise using them in your own writing.
Look out for more advanced expressions that you can use in place of phrases that weren’t even impressive at the B2 level – phrases like “solve the problem”. Here are a few alternative problem and solution phrases to get you going.:
a crisis in education which must be addressed
something that must be tackled / be dealt with
a challenge which must be met
something must be done to restore law and order in the inner cities
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The C1 Advanced Writing exam has two writing parts, which you must complete in 90 minutes. Both parts have a word limit of between 220-260 words. We recommend getting lots of writing practice under these conditions! Part 1 is always a discursive essay. It requires you to think about arguments for and against a topic.
How to write C1 Advanced (CAE) Cambridge English Essay? Structure, Writing Guide, Example Answers, Writing Topics, Tips, Marking Criteria, Useful Phrases & Expressions. words to start essay, to conclude an essay, to use in an essay, Perfect essay structure, You need to answer the question with between 220-260 words. In the text, you need to analyse a question using different points of view. It ...
Essay Samples/Model answers With Marks & Comments - C1 Advanced (CAE) .Check how to write your essay correctly, how it is scored and how to get the highest possible grade
C1 Advanced (CAE) Essay: Example Topics / Questions Below is a sample list of academic essay writing topics/tasks for C1-level (advanced) students. You can use them to practice writing English essays or to simplyy prepare for the Cambridge exam
• make notes on useful ideas and vocabulary to help you write a discursive essay strategies for planning, writing and re r writt Get to know the exam: Writing Part 1 The C1 Advanced Writing paper has two parts. Part 1 has only one task, which you must You will: answer.
3. Ask students to read the first sample Part 1 question on the sample tasks sheet very carefully, and with a partner to discuss what they have to do to answer the question. They should complete Exercise 2 (the writing plan) on their worksheets in pairs.
C1 Advanced Essay (CAE) Examples. December 16, 2019. This is a collection of CAE (Cambridge C1) essays written by my students, with my thoughts about them. There's also a video I made of me writing an essay. If you want CAE writing tips, there are lots in the writing section of this site. Special pandemic offer: For a limited time I am giving ...
In this article, I show you how to write an essay for Cambridge CAE Writing. In addition, I bring you a guide to C1 Advanced (CAE) Writing that will help you improve your writing.
Cambridge English: C1 Advanced (CAE) Writing Difficulty level: C1 / advanced What is the Advanced (CAE) Writing test like? The test has two sections and takes 90 minutes: Part 1 - Write an essay with a discursive focus Some material to read (up to 150 words) which may include material taken from advertisements, extracts from letters, emails, postcards, diaries, short articles, etc. Using this ...
The Cambridge C1 Advanced (CAE) essay is a formal, academic writing. You'll find it in Part 1 of the CAE writing exam.
Cambridge C1 Advanced (CAE): How to Write an Essay 83K views 3 years ago Let me show you all the little tips and tricks that will take your essay writing skills to the n ...more Teacher Phill 17 ...
C1 writing Are you an advanced (CEFR level C1) learner of English? Practise and improve your writing skills with these texts and exercises.
A CAE essay is an obligatory task in the C1 Advanced (CAE) Cambridge English exam. There are 4 CAE exam papers: Speaking, Listening, Reading & Use of English and Writing. The CAE essay forms part 1 of the 2 part writing paper. Students need to answer a question and write between 220-260 words. On the rest of this page I have put some CAE essay ...
C1 Advanced (CAE) Writing: Part 1 - Essay In the first part of the cae writing, there will be no choice of tasks. Your essay should be organised well, including an introduction, supporting paragraphs and a compelling conclusion.
Before you write your C1 Advanced (CAE) Essay, you must plan! But before you plan, you need to understand what type of essay structure to use. If you don't k...
Checklist to improve your writing: C1 Advanced Remember how the Writing paper is assessed Four criteria are considered when the Writing paper is marked: Content You have done what the task asked you to do. You have included all the important information.
Get better at the Writing paper and pass the C1 Advanced exam. Free practice exercises to help you improve and pass the exam.
Reasons for writing Write an essay based on points included in the text. Give reasons for your opinion. NOTE: It is essential to show your ability to select, defend and evaluate ideas.
In this video, I give 5 tips on how to improve your English writing skills. ️ If you need more help and guidance with your B2 First, C1 Advanced or C2 Profic...
To prepare for the C1 Advanced exam, learners should: Read widely to familiarise themselves with the conventions and styles of different types of writing (i.e. reports, proposals, reviews, letters and essays). Write 10-minute plans for a variety of questions in past papers, so that planning becomes automatic and quick.
Useful phrases for your essays (advanced level). Here you have some phrases to include in your essays (CEFR C1-C2).
English document from Spokane Community College, 1 page, Writing A Essay About Yourself Crafting an essay about oneself may seem like a straightforward task, but delving into the intricacies of personal experiences, achievements, and introspective reflections can make it surprisingly challenging. The difficulty